->''I say, if a novelty Christmas song is funny the first time, it's funny '''every''' time.''
->-- '''Calvin''', ''ComicStrip/CalvinAndHobbes''

->''If every day were Christmas Day, by some fantastic trick...\\
If every day were Christmas Day, we'd all be bloomin' sick.\\
If every day were Christmas Day, we'd never get our uncle Harold to leave...''
-->-- '''Eric Idle''', ''Do Not Adjust Your Set''

->''Santa's comin' and he's gonna kick your ass\\
He's gonna kick your ass\\
He's gonna kick your ass\\
Santa's comin' and he's gonna kick your ass\\
'Cause you've always been a rotten little brat!''
-->-- '''TheArrogantWorms''', "Santa's Gonna Kick Your Ass"

->''They tried to decorate and make it look more Christmassy\\
But what they did was more like Christmas in hell\\
[[AluminumChristmasTrees They nailed a Santa to a cross in front of everyone]]\\
It wasn't pleasant, but I'm sure they meant well.''
-->-- '''JonathanCoulton''', in a deleted verse from "Chiron Beta Prime"

->''In department stores, do it just because\\
Pull the whiskers off of the Santy Claus\\
Bite his leg and I run away\\
I'm the angel in the Christmas play!''
-->-- ''Spike Jones'', "The Angel in the Christmas Play"
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