[[folder:Anime & Manga]]

->''"You don't have to be rude just 'cause I wanna kill ya!"''
-->-- '''Kain Hikaru''', ''Manga/FairyTail''


[[folder:Fan Fiction]]

->"Who, the fuck, are you," he ground out slowly, though given the volume of his words he was all but shouting.\\
"Well, call me a concerned citizen. Now, if you want me to return the items I have taken, along with the one you haven't noticed me taking, you'll meet at the abandoned power station in Brooklyn. The one right off the 278 Interstate. See you there!" I said, cheerily.
-->-- '''[[{{Literature/Worm}} Taylor Hebert]]''', ''[[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/9645945/6/Fiend-or-how-I-learned-to-stop-worrying-and-love-the-Green-Sun Fiend]]''

->I will destroy you, and steal your fiance, booty, booty, booty, booty, rockin' everywhere!
-->-- '''Twilight Sparkle''', ''FanFic/FriendshipIsWitchcraft''

->Father had warned Draco against people like [Literature/HarryPotter], people who could ruin you and still be so likable that it was hard to hate them properly.
-->-- ''Fanfic/HarryPotterAndTheMethodsOfRationality''

->You know, this may be stating the obvious, but something really occurred to me while writing this chapter: people in this story, even the ones that are supposed to be on the same side, really don't like each other. If they're not screaming and trying to kill each other, they're being cold and sarcastic. Maybe that's part of the reason why Yuuka is so popular. Sure, she's a psychopathic, child-molesting lunatic, but at least she's nice!
-->-- Author's notes for Chapter 35 of ''FanFic/ImperfectMetamorphosis''

->Two ravens appeared from the darkness above them, landing on her shoulder. The hungry look with which they fixed their blood red eyes on him made the half-wight twitch uncomfortably. Hel grinned at him broadly, showing her sharp fangs. "Hugin and Munin are perfectly capable of this task, I should think," she continued, voice still a soft purr.
-->-- "[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11914159/4/The-Children-Of-The-Moon The Children Of The Moon]]"


[[folder:Film - Animated]]

->'''Tiana:''' You mean to tell me this all happened because you were messin' with the Shadow Man?!\\
'''Naveen:''' He was very charismatic!
-->-- ''Disney/ThePrincessAndTheFrog''


[[folder:Film - Live-Action]]

->''"They say I'm a 'madman', Barton. But I'm not mad at anyone. Honest, I'm not."''
-->--'''"Charlie"''' in the midst of a shotgun rampage, ''Film/BartonFink''

->''ďThis is very embarrassing. It seems there is a red box in your car. They canít get to it. They want ''me'' to make ''you'' unlock the car. I feel like an idiot. I donít know what to say. I am to torture you if you donít do it."''
-->--'''Kaufman''', ''Film/TomorrowNeverDies''

->''"Oh. This is not good. I am not killing you. Don't you understand? You must die. Will you cooperate?"''
-->--'''Franz''', ''Film/TheProducers''

->''"I know you care about him. Iíve never seen you like this with anybody, so donít get me wrong when I tell you that Tom, while being a very nice guy, is the Devil... What do you think the Devilís going to look like? [...] Come on. No oneís going to be taken in by a guy with a long, red, pointy tail. Come on, whatís he going to sound like? (''growls'') No! Iím semi-serious here... No, heíll be attractive, heíll be nice and helpful. Heíll get a job where he influences a great and God-fearing nation. Heíll never do an evil thing. Heíll never deliberately hurt a living thing. Heíll just, bit by little bit, lower our standards where theyíre important. Just a tiny little bit. Just coax along flash over substance. Just a tiny little bit."''
-->-- '''[[Creator/AlbertBrooks Aaron Altman]]''', ''Film/BroadcastNews''

->'''Rorschach:''' You killed the Comedian!\\
'''[[spoiler:Ozymandias:]]''' May he rest in peace.
-->-- ''Film/{{Watchmen}}''

->'''"Charlie":''' Don't look at me like that. It's just me! Charlie!\\
'''Barton:''' I hear it's Mundt. "Madman Mundt".\\
'''"Charlie:''' Jesus, people can be cruel. If it's not my build, it's my personality.



-> And just like that, it felt like someone had poured cold water down my back. The casual way the green-eyed man had just referred to murder had jarred me back into reality. Villains. Funny and almost likable, but still villains.
-->-- ''Literature/APracticalGuideToEvil,'' [[https://practicalguidetoevil.wordpress.com/2015/04/16/chapter-3-squire/ Book 1, Chapter 3]]

->''"He was the mildest-manner'd man that ever scuttled ship or cut a throat."''
-->-- ''Literature/DonJuan'', Canto III

->''"At what point did you forget that I am a vampire, Dresden? A monster. A habitually neat, polite, civil, and efficient monster. [...] {{I am what I am}}."''
-->-- '''Lara Raith''', ''[[Literature/TheDresdenFiles Turn Coat]]''

->''"Happy [[DeadlyGame Hunger Games!]] And may the odds be EVER in your favor!"''
-->-- '''Effie Trinket''', ''Literature/TheHungerGames''

->''"... trying to fix precisely what it was about [Crassus] which made him so disconcerting, I think it was this: his indiscriminate and detached friendliness, which you knew would never waver or diminish even if he had just decided to have you killed."''
-->-- '''[[FirstPersonPeripheralNarrator Tiro]]''', ''Literature/{{Imperium}}''

->'''Dr. Watson:''' You say he was affable?\\
'''Literature/SherlockHolmes:''' A purring cat who thinks he sees prospective mice. Some people's affability is more deadly than the violence of coarser souls.
-->-- "The Adventure of the Illustrious Client"

->''"Power tastes best when sweetened by courtesy."''
-->-- '''Roose Bolton''', ''Literature/ASongOfIceAndFire''

->'''Vivenna''': Denth used me. And the worst part is, I still feel like this must all be a misunderstanding. I feel that he's really my friend, and that I should go to him and find out why he did what he did. Maybe we are all just confused. But then I remember the things I saw him do. My friend Parlin is dead. Other soldiers sent by my father, stuffed in sacks. I'm so confused.\\
'''Vasher''': You're not the first one he's taken in, Princess. Denth... he's a subtle one. A man like him can be evil to the core, but if he's charismatic and amusing, people will listen to him. They'll even like him.
-->-- ''Literature/{{Warbreaker}}''

->''"Now listen to me. I like you. The consequence is that it would annoy me for just about two and a half minutes if I heard that you had died in torments. Well, if you ever tell the police or any human soul about us, I shall have that two and a half minutes of discomfort. On your discomfort I will not dwell. Good-day. Mind the step."''
-->-- '''Sunday''', ''Literature/TheManWhoWasThursday''

->''At seven o'clock precisely the twenty men who made up [[NebulousEvilOrganization this organization]] strode, lounged, or sidled, each according to his character, into the workmanlike board room on the third floor. Their chairman was already in his seat. No greetings were exchanged. They were ruled by the chairman to be a waste of breath and, in an organization of this nature, hypocritical.''
-->-- ''Literature/{{Thunderball}}''

->''About three months later, I got a nice letter from Captain Halsing, postmarked Milwaukee, thanking me for my hospitality. He was the model Nazi, cold, competent, and perfectly polite.''
-->--'''John Rumford''', ''Literature/{{Victoria}}''


[[folder:Live-Action TV]]

->''"Buffy, I'm here to kill you, not to judge you."''
-->-- '''Holden Webster''', ''Series/BuffyTheVampireSlayer'', "Conversations With Dead People"

->'''Romana I''': But he had such an honest face!\\
'''Fourth Doctor''': Well, you could hardly be a successful criminal with a ''dis''honest face.
-->-- ''Series/DoctorWho'', "The Ribos Operation"

->''"I'm a psychopath, I'm not ''rude''."''
-->-- '''River Song''', ''Series/DoctorWho'', "Let's Kill Hitler"

->''"Hello, ordinary person. Please maintain a minimum separation of three feet. I'm really trying not to kill anyone today, but it would be tremendously helpful if your major arteries were out of reach."''
-->-- '''Missy''', ''Series/DoctorWho'', "World Enough and Time"

->''"You're so ''polite''...you make me sick!"''
-->--'''Theo Kojak''' to a double-murderer, ''The Marcus-Nelson Murders''

->'''D'Argo:''' Stay back! Stay back or I swear, I will kill you.\\
'''Kaarvok:''' I don't think ''that's'' very polite.
-->-- ''Series/{{Farscape}}'', "Eat Me"

->'''Scorpius:''' Ka D'Argo, is it? I don't believe we've had the pleasure.\\
(''D'Argo leaps out of his chair, brandishing a metal goblet as an improvised weapon'')\\
'''Scorpius:''' I am totally unarmed; I bear you no ill will. Perhaps we should... well, [[NoMrBondIExpectYouToDine reorder, and share a repast...]]
-->-- ''Series/{{Farscape}}''

->''"Just because I'm an evil scientist doesn't mean that I'm not nice!"''
-->-- '''Dr. Wolfgang Amadeus Ratfink von Petal''', ''Series/TheGoodies''

->'''Hannibal:''' Mason is discourteous. [[MythologyGag Discourtesy is unspeakably ugly to me.]]\\
'''Will:''' Are you thinking about eating him?\\
'''Hannibal:''' Whenever feasible, one should always try to eat the rude.
-->-- ''Series/{{Hannibal}}''

->''"Now you can't have any of my pie."''
-->-- '''Daniel Linderman''', ''Series/{{Heroes}}''

->'''Ben:''' I'd like you to take a walk with me.\\
'''Jack:''' You say that like you're not going to knock me out and put a bag over my head if I say no.\\
'''Ben:''' Then don't say no.
-->-- ''Series/{{Lost}}''

->''"Ray is protective, kind.\\
Ray is dangerous, a criminal."''
-->-- '''Elliot''', ''Series/MrRobot''

->'''Hilda:''' Salem, what's the matter?\\
'''[[SnarkyNonHumanSidekick Salem]]:''' (''looking at a robin's corpse while crying'') I killed him. I landed on him when I fell out of the tree! [[CatsAreMean All I wanted to do was scare, humiliate, and emotionally scar him for life]] - I didn't want to hurt him!
-->-- ''Series/SabrinaTheTeenageWitch''

->''"I didn't want to hurt you, Sabrina. I just wanted to ''rule'' you!"''
-->-- '''Salem''', ''Series/SabrinaTheTeenageWitch''

->'''Apophis:''' May your reign last days... and your death years!
->'''Baal:''' ''(smirk)'' [[ActuallyPrettyFunny That's actually rather good. Isn't it?]]
->''(Teal'c nods)''
->'''Baal:''' Did you plan to say that when you walked in? ''(cuts off a piece of Apophis' head with a sword, killing his symbiote)'' [[BondOneLiner Or was it just off the top of your head?]]
-->-- ''Series/StargateSG1''

->''"Don't believe we've met; Proposition Joe. You ever steal from me, I'll kill your whole family."''
-->-- ''Series/TheWire''



->''Please allow me to introduce myself\\
I'm a {{man of wealth and taste}}\\
I've been around for a long, long year\\
Stole many a man's soul and faith\\
And I was 'round when Jesus Christ\\
Had his moment of doubt and pain\\
Made damn sure that Pilate\\
Washed his hands and sealed his fate\\
Pleased to meet you\\
Hope you guess my name''
-->-- '''Music/TheRollingStones''', "Sympathy for the Devil"

->''I'd like to help you Tom, in any way I can\\
I sure appreciate the way you're working with me\\
I'm not a monster Tom, well, technically I am\\
I guess I am''
-->-- '''Music/JonathanCoulton''', "Re: Your Brains" (A song used in VideoGame/Left4Dead2)


[[folder:Tabletop Games]]

->[[ImmortalityImmorality With the single exception of her undeniable desire to continue her own life and youth at the expense of others]], Mrs Talitha Johnson is a virtuous and respectable woman. She volunteers at the local library, tends her yard and flowerbeds and, generally speaking, [[VillainWithGoodPublicity is a sweet and kind presence in the neighborhood]]. She [[FriendToAllChildren genuinely likes children]] and regrets the necessity of [[WouldHurtaChild preying upon them]], but has plenty of time between the ceremonies to put the [[LifeDrinker harm she does]] in the back of her mind. Even during the ceremony she does her utmost to make certain that the process is the least painful and frightening possible for her target child.
-->--"The Forever Club," ''[[TabletopGame/NewWorldOfDarkness Innocents]]''

->What is that? You meant no offence? My dear boy, none taken! Your [[SorcerousOverlord wizardly masters]] may cloister themselves in [[MageTower their towers]], glowering balefully on strangers, but we [[HumanoidAbomination Tzimisce]] are an [[SacredHospitality open and trusting folk]]. Indeed, our reputation for receptiveness is matched only by our reputation for [[CruelMercy mercy]]. Would you not agree, Stephen? What is it that your masters call us, as they fearfully scan the night from their battlements?
->Why, Stephen, you are pale and shaking! Did I not say that the night air might prove bad for your health? I had thought to let you pass the night and leave come the morn, but you seem gripped with illness! That settles it, then: you shall stay with us indefinitely and we shall work [[{{Biomanipulation}} our arts of physick]] upon you, that you might be made... [[BodyHorror well]]. What - oh, do not think to thank us! It is the smallest task, and one we shall set with alacrity! After all, save for the stimulating division your Tremere masters have recently seen fit to offer, there is little to occupy us in the Old Country. No, we stand ready to provide our fullest attention to you tonight... and the night after... [[AndIMustScream and the night after...]]
-->--'''Boleslav Volhyny,''' ''TabletopGame/VampireTheMasquerade - Libellus Sanguinis: Masters of the State''



->''O villain, villain, smiling, damned villain!\\
My tables-meet it is I set it down\\
That one may smile, and smile, and be a villain.''
-->-- '''Theatre/{{Hamlet}}'''

->''"And though scary is exciting, nice is different than good."''
-->-- '''Little Red''', ''Theatre/IntoTheWoods''

->''"You'll remain as hostage here, should Hilarion disappear, we will hang you - never fear! - most politely, most politely, most politely."''
-->-- '''King Hildebrand''', ''Theatre/PrincessIda''

->''I am a sentimental man\\
Who always longed to be a father\\
That's why I do the best I can\\
To treat each citizen of Oz as a son\\
Or daughter\\
So Elphaba, I'd like to raise you high\\
'Cause I think everyone deserves the chance to fly\\
And helping you with your ascent al-\\
-lows me to feel so parental\\
For I am a sentimental man''
-->-- '''[[VillainWithGoodPublicity The Wizard,]]''' ''Theatre/{{Wicked}}''

->'''Quirrell''': The Yule Ball has finally arrived! I have the key!\\
'''Voldemort''': I KNOW, Quirrell, I HEAR EVERYTHING YOU HEAR!\\
'''Quirrell''': Sorry, my lord.\\
'''Voldemort''': No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have snapped. I'm just nervous, that's all.


[[folder:Video Games]]

->''"Ah, [[PlayerCharacter commander]]! You must be lost! This is not your precious Blue Zone, this is Nod territory! Tell you what... I'll have my troops send you home. ({{Beat}}) In a body bag...
-->-- '''Kane''', ''VideoGame/CommandAndConquer3TiberiumWars''

->''"Wednesday, we spill the blood of virgin chickens. Thursday we anoint ourselves in said blood. Friday is, of course, poker night."''
-->-- '''Cultist of Shadow''', ''VideoGame/{{Fable}}''

->''"Killing you and giving you good advice aren't mutually exclusive. The rocket really is the way to go."''
-->-- '''[=GLaDOS=]''', ''[[VideoGame/{{Portal 1}} Portal]]''

->''"I wanted to talk to you for a moment, if I may. I'll be honest: The death traps have been a bit of a failure so far. For both of us. I think you'll agree. And you are getting very close to my lair. 'Lair' - heh, weird isn't it? First time I've said it out loud. Sounds a bit ridiculous, really. But I can assure you it is one. It is a proper lair. Deadly lair. And I just wanted to give you the chance to kill yourself now. Before you get to the lair. You can just jump into the masher, just there. Less a death trap, more a death option for you."''
-->[[spoiler:'''Wheatley]]''', ''VideoGame/{{Portal 2}}''



->''"I mean, just because I'm evil doesn't mean I have to be rude. It's important to me to be a good host. That's just how I was raised, y'know? We are living in a society, after all. We have rules. Without them, we'd be no better than... than... [[NotSoImaginaryFriend FOREST IMPS]]!!!"''
-->-- '''Garland''', ''Webcomic/EightBitTheater''

->'''Red Mage:''' Did you see that?!\\
'''Black Mage:''' Garland is so hideously evil that he can afford to be nice before he kills us!\\
'''Fighter:''' He must be so powerful that even the shiniest sword could not save us now!
-->--[[https://www.nuklearpower.com/2002/01/17/episode-109-a-little-kindness-goes-a-long-way/ The Light Warriors]] reading Garland entirely wrong, ''Webcomic/EightBitTheater''

->'''Helen''': You might be able to avert doom.\\
'''Artie''': And what if you're the one causing it?\\
'''Helen''': Well, that's to be expected.


[[folder:Web Original]]

->''"Sure, she steals things that are pretty hard to steal, but then she gives you clues on how to find her, just because it's sportsmanlike."''
-->-- '''WebVideo/TheNostalgiaChick''', on Franchise/CarmenSandiego

->''"Whether itís the [[WickedCultured classical music]] playing in the background, [[NoMisterBondIExpectYouToDine the omelette]] or the [[ManOfWealthAndTaste fine]] suits, Fisk repeatedly asserts his own humanity and civility. No matter where the day takes him, no matter how it plays out, Fisk at least starts the day as a refined and cultured gentleman. It is a lie, but it is no greater a lie than that told by Matt Murdock."''
-->--'''[[http://them0vieblog.com/2015/04/20/daredevil-shadows-in-the-glass-review/ Darren Mooney]]''' on ''Series/{{Daredevil 2015}}''

->''"This guy was borderline unhinged, too much power in too unstable a package, and I almost ''liked'' him.''"
-->-- '''Weaver''' on Phir Sē, ''Literature/{{Worm}}''

->''"Hold on, I'm getting a call. ''*looks at phone*'' "Jesus". Thank Heavens. Hey, you're on the whole "hailstone" thing today, right? Raining down from above? Yeah, and you talked to Timmy, he's gonna hold the Sun in the sky so that they have more time for the slaughter? Okay, now remember, I want to kill more people with the hailstones than the people on the ground kill. *laughing* I know, I'm ridiculously competitive. Okay. Alright, bye-bye."''
-->--'''''WebVideo/MisterDeity''''', "Mr. Deity and the Promised Land"

->''"Thanks for your question! I look forward to killing'' you ''soon!"''
-->'''The Ninja''', ''WebVideo/AskANinja''


[[folder:Western Animation]]

->'''Mr. Toad''': Boss! It's the Bat Guy!\\
'''Professor Pyg''': It's Batman, Toad. Remember, respect our enemies.
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/BewareTheBatman'', "Hunted"

->''"Bad man. Good manners."''
-->--'''Ron Stoppable''' on Señor Senior, Sr., ''WesternAnimation/KimPossible''

->''"Oh boy, here I go killing again!"''
-->-- '''Krombopulos Michael''', ''WesternAnimation/RickAndMorty''

->''"Homer I'm disappointed, but I think you need to do what's best for your family. [...] But Homer, on your way out, if you wanna kill somebody, it would help me a lot."''
-->-- '''Hank Scorpio''', as commandos storm his {{elaborate underground base}}, ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons''

->''[[NamesToRunAwayFromReallyFast Scorpio!]]\\
He'll sting you with his dreams of power and wealth.\\
Beware of Scorpio!\\
His twisted twin obsessions are [[TakeOverTheWorld his plot to rule the world]]\\
[[BenevolentBoss And his employees' health]].\\
He'll welcome you into his lair,\\
Like the nobleman welcomes his guest.\\
With free dental care and a stock plan that helps you invest!\\
But beware of his generous pensions,\\
Plus three weeks paid vacation each year,\\
And on Fridays the lunchroom serves hot dogs and burgers and beer!\\
He loves German beer!''
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons''

->'''Man:''' Well I say we ban Homer from our restaurants.\\
'''Akira:''' No, [[JapanesePoliteness that would be impolite.]] I say we KILL HIM!
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'', "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?"

->'''Killer Moth''': My demands are simple. The city will declare me ruler, the Teen Titans will surrender, and Robin.... ''will take this lovely young lady to her junior prom''.
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/TeenTitans'', "Date With Destiny"

-> '''Mojo Jojo''': Powerpuff Girls save the day? Curses! I SWEAR that today is the day, that I will crush the Powerpuff Girls! BUT FIRST, I must intend to do the dishes of the soil of the food that I have eaten.
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/ThePowerpuffGirls'', "Just Another Manic Mojo"

-> "They meet Jojo, a monkey (though technically a chimpanzee) with an all-around sympathetic nature, but is he on their side
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/ThePowerpuffGirlsMovie'', "The movie's manual about Mojo Jojo"

-> ''"Don't let their congenial manner fool you; they're a lot tougher than they look. This one ate a Congressman! And this one destroyed a city before he could walk."''
-->--'''[[WhenTreesAttack King Pistachion]]''', describing his children; ''WesternAnimation/MiloMurphysLaw''

-> ''"I hate to admit it, but for an evil villain, you have been '''very''' hospitable."''
-->-- '''Dojo''' to '''Chase Young''', ''WesternAnimation/XiaolinShowdown''

[[folder:Real Life]]

->''"The Master said, 'Fine words and an insinuating appearance are seldom associated with virtue.'"''
-->-- '''Creator/{{Confucius}}'''

->''"When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite."''
-->-- '''UsefulNotes/WinstonChurchill'''

->''"I have to say, that I quite liked the man. I am ashamed to say such a thing. But had I not been able to see what was happening outside the window I would have said he was very civilised. Odd, isn't it?"''
-->-- '''Carl Giles''' on [[UsefulNotes/NaziGermany Josef Kramer, commandant of the Bergen-Belsen concentration camp]]

->''"It was like watching {{Film/Gidget}} address the Reichstag."''
-->-- '''Matt Taibbi''' on the [[UsefulNotes/SarahPalin 2008 Republican National Convention]]