[[caption-width-right:362:Yes, this ''is'' what the entire video looks like.]]

->''"Watching this video, you will wonder, briefly, if Chris Dane Owens "means it". This is an ungenerous thought--dismiss it. You may also wonder why "Shine On Me" is modelled on early ABC and Spandau Ballet and padded out with an unnecessary layer of loud guitars. Irrelevant. What you need to know is that Mr. Owens will live forever--until the dragons rule the earth again (or the first time, whatever)--and that you are going to watch this video more times than you can imagine. You may dream of this video, but the dream won't be as good because it won't be this video."''

"Shine on Me" is a song by Chris Dane Owens (son of ''Series/LaughIn'' star Gary Owens) from his album ''Blue Stone''. An 80s love song made in 2008, under most circumstances it would just be thrown in the GuiltyPleasures pile without another look. But that was before Owens, armed with a budget that he's too embarrassed to admit, footage from other movies, a green screen, [[http://www.robertshort.com/ Robert Short]] and a PornStache, created an incomprehensible mess of a music video jammed with as many over-the-top fantasy cliches as possible.

And by "fantasy cliches", we mean all the evil sirens, dragons, [[StuffBlowingUp explosions]], assorted swashbuckling, stallions, fair maidens, floating fair maidens, glowing books, ghosts, goths, an electric guitar, sculpted body armour, sculpted body armor nipples, pirate ships, exploding pirate ships, a Legolas lookalike, a Dr. Doom lookalike, witches, hot witches in catsuits, spinning crystals, [[InstantAwesomeJustAddDragons dragons]], Stonehenge, [[ChromaKey awful bluescreen effects]] and an [[BigLippedAlligatorMoment alligator.]] ... well, by now it's safe to say it's made of pure awesome. And [[SoBadItsGood cheese.]]

Was [[Website/{{Cracked}} Cracked.com]]'s #1 for the "6 Worst Professional Music Video" (of course Swaim ends up saying "Who am I kidding, this video is fucking amazing" at the end) and won ''The New Yorker''[='s=] "Video Of The Year" award.

It can be watched [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDyDz8WeiM4 here]].

Not to be confused with Mr. Big's "Shine", which was the closing theme for ''Manga/{{Hellsing}} TV''.
'''This music video contains examples of:'''
* AllThereInTheManual:
** ''My character is part of the witches kingdom, which is the second kingdom. I'm actually part of their army and an enforcer, a general, if you will. I meet that young lady Arra who is secretly being trained by the angels and they hand her a book. That book is the book of golden symbols which can only be understood by the spirit, by the living soul. She's being trained secretly to be the queen of this realm, to overthrow the forces of darkness. My character actually meets her and falls in love with her and decides to leave the dark side, so he has an epiphany.''
** He happily explains the video and the sequel [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AZbNeFzZQXM here]]. The way he talks about it, it almost makes sense.
* ArtifactsofDoom
* BackFromTheDead: Resurrection apparently involves ripping your shirt off while blinding light bursts out of your chest.
* BadassCape
* CaliforniaDoubling: Los Angeles doubles for [[TheLordOfTheRings Middle Earth]].
* ChromaKey: Abused like a bag of free heroin.
* CoolHorse
* CoolSword: so cool, it actually looks uncannily like a Franklin Mint reproduction.
* CueTheSun
* DevelopmentHell: A manga, book adaptation and two sequels were planned, but never produced. Well, not so much "planned" as "made unrealistic pie-in-the-sky dreams of", but still.
** Actually, the sequel [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MRumTSNXTe0 was released in March 2014]]. It's pretty much exactly what you'd expect.
* DullSurprise: Everyone has an unchanging slack-jawed stare.
* EpicRocking
* EverythingsBetterWithSparkles: Owens fights off a menacing swarm of blue sparkles.
* FemmeFatale: FemmeFatale goths with catsuits and magical powers.
* FantasyKitchenSink
* {{Gainaxing}}: Owens' lover and her...assets.
* InstantAwesomeJustAddDragons
* MalevolentMaskedMen
* MatteShot: Also abused.
* NeverSmileAtACrocodile
* NinjaPirateZombieRobot: arguably, the main character considering he goes from pirate to plate-armored knight in the space of four minutes.
* NippleAndDimed: About a minute in. Whoops.
* OminousFog
* {{Pirate}}s: Just because.
* PointyEars
* PornStache
* RuleOfCool
* SceneryPorn: Tons of it.
* SlippySlideyIceWorld: Complete with a frozen dragon carcass and random ice castle.
* StockFootage: Half the scenes are ripped from other movies.
* StuffBlowingUp
'''''Love has enemies'''''