[[quoteright:350:[[Website/{{Cracked}} http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/machinegundog_6460.jpg]]]]
[[caption-width-right:350:And if you think that's scary,\\
you should see the Schnauwitzer]]

->''"Mr. Powers, you'll notice that all the [[ThreateningShark sharks]] have [[FrickinLaserBeams laser beams]] attached to their heads."''
-->-- '''Dr. Evil''', ''Film/AustinPowers: International Man of Mystery''

A SubTrope of AttackAnimal and BeastOfBattle. What could be more dangerous than an animal, wild or not? Mounting weapons on it. Or simply [[StuffBlowingUp explosives]], to add animal cruelty to injury.

See also WeaponizedCar. {{Wikipedia}} has a [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Category:Military_animals category for this]]. For animals used as weapons, see BaaBomb, GrievousHarmWithABody, ShamuFu, and AbnormalAmmo. For weapons they ''already'' have without outside interference see NaturalWeapon. Not related to WeaponizedOffspring.

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!!Examples:

[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder:Anime]]
* ''Manga/GetterRobo'': [[TheEmpire The Dinosaur Empire]] uses dinosaurs and other prehistoric animals equipped with cannons, missile launchers, flame-throwers, blades attached to their claws...
* ''KingOfBanditJing'' (also known as Jing: King of Bandits): Jing is accompanied by Kir, a talking bird that somehow can attach to his arm and fire "Kir Royales"; extremely destructive green energy bolts. ([[spoiler:In one episode it is discovered that Kir's ability is not unique to his species]])
* {{Inverted|Trope}} in ''Manga/OnePiece'': Lassoo, Mr. 4's gun-dog, is an animalized weapon. How exactly this happened has yet to be explained. For added humor, it had a cold and sneezes explosive baseballs.
** Played straight during Skypiea. Shura's bird-mount [[BreathWeapon can breathe fire]] because it has a flame dial (sea shell) in its beak.
** The cover for Chapter 536 shows Franky building an "alpaca tank".
* ''GundamSeed'' has the mobile suits Bacue , and it's commander type Lagowe, four-legged, canine-based units designed for ground battle, excelling at mobilty on terrains that a two legged unit may struggle on. They also mount missile launchers and railguns for the former, and beam cannons on the latter.
** ''GundamSeedDestiny'' get the advanced versions, the Kerberos, which have two extra heads mounted on the back, doubling as beam cannons. then there is the Gaia Gundam, which can transform into a canine-based mode, and used side-mounted sword to quickly chop up enemies.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Card Games]]
* The ''[[http://wingnutgames.com/BC3ECover.JPG Battle Cattle]]'' game has ''cows'' with mounted weapons.
* ''TabletopGame/SmashUp'' has the Dinosaur faction. By which we mean cybernetically-enhanced dinosaurs with mounted laser guns and armor.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Comic Books]]
* ''{{Fables}}'': Talking animals developed various ways to carry and fire various guns and other projectiles during an attempted coup. Hilarious and scary at the same time.
** And later, the same devices would be put to use so that the Fable animals could take part in the war against the empire.
* ''ComicBook/{{We3}}''' centered its story around the ethics and consequences of this trope, together with a cyborg version of AIIsACrapshoot.
* ''ComicBook/BruteForce'': The good guys were a [[HeroicDolphin dolphin]], {{bears|AreBadNews}}, [[KangaroosRepresentAustralia kangaroo]], eagle, and lion. The villains were a [[EverythingsBetterWithMonkeys gorilla]], {{rhino|Rampage}}, vulture, [[ThreateningShark shark]], and [[EverythingsSquishierWithCephalopods octopus]]. All of them had their own weapons and PoweredArmor.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Films -- Animation]]
* ''WesternAnimation/LegendOfTheGuardiansTheOwlsOfGaHoole'': some of the owls have metal talons, and the bats have blades on their wings.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Films -- Live-Action]]
* ''Film/AustinPowers'' provides the page quote, though Dr. Evil didn't get them until ''Goldmember''.
* The movie ''Film/LeonardPart6'' included an ostrich with missile launchers mounted on it (which makes the movie sound far cooler than it actually was).
* The ''Film/BrotherhoodOfTheWolf'' attach metal armor, claws and fangs to their "beast" to make it more fearsome and otherwordly.
* ''Film/ReluctantInfidel'': a cell of bumbling jihadists attempt to attach an explosive vest to a crow, with [[HilarityEnsues predictable results]]
* In ''Film/{{Wanted}}'', the Exterminator makes bombs which he straps to the backs of rats.
* In ''Film/TheLordOfTheRings'', there are the [[http://lotr.wikia.com/wiki/Mumakil Oliphaunts]], fantasy equivalents of colossal, six-tusked elephants used as beasts of war by the warriors of Harad to aid Sauron's conquests. Most depictions have them with giant bamboo and canvas towers strapped to their backs filled with archers and spearmen, red banners, war paint, and sharp bamboo spikes strapped to their tusks to impale enemies.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Literature]]
* There is an instance of this in ''The Butter Battle Book''.
* The [[KnightTemplar Green Storm]] in the ''MortalEngines'' books use [[NinjaPirateZombieRobot undead cyborg Stalker-birds]] of a variety of sizes for combat and reconnaisance, with even the smallest packing a nasty set of blades on its claws and beak.
** Their chief MadScientist also shares plans for a stealthy Stalker-cat, machine-gun-armed Stalker-centaurs and an explosive-packed, suicide-bombing [[GiantMook Stalker-whale]] that could potentially sink an entire city.
* ''Literature/TheWindupGirl'' by Paolo Bacigalupi: war megodonts (giant genetically-engineered elephants) have carbon fibre armour, blades attached to their tusks and machine-gun cages on their backs.
* The Incendiary Cat Plot mentioned in the ''Literature/VorkosiganSaga'' may or may not be an example of this trope. [[NoodleIncident As it has not been explained in any detail, it's hard to be sure]].
* In the Creator/JackLondon short story "Moon-face", the narrator plots to kill his neighbor, the titular moon-faced man, using a variation on this. The gent in question had but a single vice: dynamite fishing, which he would engage in every spring without fail. So the narrator goes and gets a dog and teaches it a single trick: to fetch. Then he presents the moon-faced man with a dog that no matter what, will always ''always'' '''always''' bring back what has been thrown. Of course, the moon-faced man brings his new dog with him the next time he goes fishing...
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Live Action TV]]
* [[SaturdayNightLive Andy Samberg's]] Laser Cats!
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Music]]
* [[http://www.cowswithguns.com/cgi-bin/home.cgi Dana Lyons]]' [[http://www.cowswithguns.com/cgi-bin/listen_claymation.cgi?cart=1295989910 Cows]] [[http://www.cowswithguns.com/cgi-bin/listen_animation.cgi?cart=1295989910 with Guns]]
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Mythology]]
* In Russia, there is a legend about Olga the Wise, the wife of prince Igor. The legend is kinda like this: Igor was going about collecting taxes from his subjects. He decided to collect more than was agreed on from the drevlyane tribe. This did not turn out well: apparently, they decided they weren't putting up with his shit and [[CruelAndUnusualDeath ripped him apart]] [[TreeBuchet with trees]]. So, his wife, [[SilkHidingSteel Olga]], decided to avenge him. Among other things, she [[TheChessmaster manipulated and bullied them]] into paying her tribute, but demanded nothing more than a couple of birds per house. The drevlyane were more than happy to oblige, thinking they got off easy. However, Olga had her soldiers tie oil-soaked rags to the birds' legs and release them. According to the legend, the pigeons flew back to their nests and the whole city of the drevlyane [[KillItWithFire burned to the ground]].
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Newspaper Comics]]
* [[BloomCounty The Bassalope Defense System]] involved strapping a nuke between Rosebud's antlers and pointing him in the direction of Soviet Russia.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Tabletop Games]]
* Orks from ''TabletopGame/{{Warhammer 40000}}'' are fond of Squig-bombs and attack squigs.
** The setting also has grox- large, aggressive, omnivorous dinosaur-like herd animals raised by the Imperium as a food source. Most of the herd are lobotomized to make them more docile and safe to handle ("lobo-grox"), but to protect the herd, a few are instead fitted with a robotic arm tipped with a [[FrickinLaserBeams laspistol]] ("robo-grox").
* Similar to the real life example from the Crimea (below), the Empire from ''TabletopGame/{{Warhammer}}'' has, among its weapons of war, Herstel-Wenck Pigeon Bombs.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Toys]]
* ''{{BIONICLE}}'': Jaller Mahri had a Hahnah Crab that was equipped with a [[GatlingGood Cordak Blaster]].
** Pit War Tortoises had mounted [[EverythingsSquishierWithCephalopods Squid Launchers]].
** Thanks to tampering from the Great Beings, the Skopio species have [[AbnormalAmmo Thornax]] Launchers on their [[BewareMyStingerTail tails]].
* The Trendmasters ''Franchise/{{Godzilla}}'' toyline once included figures of Godzilla and Rodan that had power-up armor which fired toy missiles.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Video Games]]
* ''VideoGame/{{Mother 3}}'': [[EverythingsBetterWithMonkeys Gorillas]] with [[EpicFlail wrecking balls]], hippos with missiles, moles with [[ThisIsADrill drill]] arms, mice with propellers, and so much more.
** Also worth mentioning is a reconstructed turtle that looks like a normal enemy until it turns around. Then there's [[OhCrap an entire armada of cannons installed]]. MoreDakka, indeed.
* ''MetalSlug'': various slugs are animals, such as elephants, mules, camels, and ostriches.
* In ''VideoGame/ResonanceOfFate'', several enemies are two-legged 'walker' animals (usually seen used to carry heavy loads) fitted with a variety of weapons, from side-mounted gatling-guns and underslung tank-cannons, to flame-throwers for close-up work and heavy explosives for those kamikaze charges...
* ''VideoGame/{{Scribblenauts}}'' provides us with the aforementioned laser-sharks as well as a novel item: ''glue''. Glue + large steel spike + elephant + [[ChainsawGood chainsaw]] = '''awesome'''
* In ''Tribal Rage'', the redneck faction can train [[ActionBomb explosive pigs]].
* In ''VideoGame/WorldOfWarcraft'', Engineers can create... [[http://www.wowhead.com/item=4384 the Explosive Sheep]].
* ''VideoGame/{{Worms}}'' created the Explosive Sheep first, as well as featuring such weapons as Mad Cows, Concrete Donkeys, and Mole Bombs. To say nothing of the fact that ''worms'' are deploying all of these devices.
* ''TransformersWarForCybertron'': the slugs encountered in the Autobots campaign have turrets mounted on them for Optimus and co. to use.
* ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyXIII'' features militarized monsters enhanced with cybernetics and magic which can be summoned from MagiTek portals. It's all very flashy. Ironically, they're consistently ''less'' fearsome and dangerous than the actual animals they're based on.
* ''VideoGame/CommandAndConquerRedAlert2'' first featured [[HeroicDolphin dolphins]] equipped with sonar weaponry, as well as Soviet anti-ship squid. The sequel kept the dolphins and introduced attack dogs and [[BearsAreBadNews attack bears]] with sonar amplifiers that can paralyze attackers.
** As an April Fool's joke, the ''VideoGame/CommandAndConquerRedAlert3'' website features specs of a new unit: the Mammoth Tank. Unlike the classic Command and Conquer unit it's homaging, though, this was ''an actual mammoth'' mounted with gigantic guns.
* ''VideoGame/PokemonBlackAndWhite'' features the new Pokémon Genesect, which is a Bug/Steel type. With a ''[[FrickinLaserBeams laser cannon]] on its back''. It's species is listed as the 'Paleozoic Pokémon', and there is only one because it was [[spoiler: brought back to life by Team Plasma, who modified the laser]]. It was also stated that it was regarded as the fiercest hunter 300 million years ago. Now imagine if [[OhCrap this was a native species in the present timezone]].
** ''{{Pokemon}}'' also has [[TurtlePower Blastoise]] who has cannons under its shell. Octillery can be an example since evolution altered it to become a octopus/tank hybrid with a cannon-shaped mouth.
** There's also Magmortar, with its hand-flamethrower thing.
* In ''VideoGame/{{Okami}}'', Amaterasu, the sun goddess protagonist in white wolf from, can wield various weapons which hover over her back. She starts out with a [[FlamingSword flaming]] [[LuckilyMyShieldWillProtectMe shield]], but can also use other shields, [[CoolSword swords]], or necklaces, (which are used like a [[WhipItGood whip]], or shot like bullets.)
** Oki also wields a sword, which hovers over his back when he is in wolf form, like Amaterasu.
* The [[WebGames flash game]] ''VideoGame/UltimateCrabBattle'' has a shark named Bobbeh with various weaponry, including FrickinLaserBeams.
* In ''VideoGame/{{Iji}}'', after the [[SillinessSwitch Scrambler]] is unlocked, "missile ponies" (a pony with missiles) become a reoccurring conversation subject.
* ''VideoGame/{{Turok}}'' games famously feature all manner of [[MoreDakka weapon-toting]] [[EverythingsBetterWithDinosaurs dinosaurs]].
* One of the three main playable characters in ''JetForceGemini'' is Lupus, a dog with a laser gun on his back. Later in the game he is upgraded into some sort of [[NinjaPirateZombieRobot jet pack tank dog.]]
* In ''VideoGame/GearsOfWar'', the Locust equip many of their various [[BeastOfBattle warbeasts]] with weapons and/or amour.
* The laser-shooting Toaster Dog in ''VideoGame/SecretOfEvermore''.
* In ''[[VideoGame/RomeTotalWar Rome: Total War]]'' one of the earliest units you can create is a herd of pigs. As you might suspect pigs are not fearsome fighters. So instead you would cover the pigs in oil, set them alight and hope they charge into the enemy. The aim was to break up formations, demoralize the men and spook any animals on the opposing side.
* Many of the examples listed in Real Life appear in the ''VideoGame/AgeOfEmpires'' series and other History-based RTS games.
* ''VideoGame/SwordOfTheStars: The Pit'' has Cyberjaeger Bears, which are native bearlike creatures turned into cyborgs and given heavy weapons.
* Near the end of ''Videogame/FarCry3BloodDragon'', Rex comes across [[spoiler:the [[FunWithAcronyms Battle Armored Dragon Assault Strike System]], a Blood Dragon (a creature that was already the most powerful predator of the game) with a mini-gun strapped to it.]] Thanks to the [[SwordOfPlotProgression Killstar]], the creature states that Rex is now it's rider. Cue the rampage as Rex and the [[spoiler:BADASS]] destroy what's left of the villain's forces.
* ''VideoGame/MedalOfHonor: Rising Sun'' had a set-piece towards the end of the game featuring a machine gun mounted on the back of an elephant, which you get to ride. This was rather less awesome than it sounds, unfortunately.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Western Animation]]
* Conversed in ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons''
-->'''Burns''': I suggest you leave immediately.\\
'''Homer''': Or what? You'll release the dogs, or the bees, [[BreadEggsBreadedEggs or the dogs with bees in their mouths]] and when they bark they [[BeeBeeGun shoot bees at you]]? Well, go ahead -- do your worst! ''Burns slams the door and locks it'' He locked the door! I'll show him -- ''rings the doorbell and runs away''
** In a deleted scene they had a [[PokeThePoodle Robotic Richard Simmons]] instead of the closing the door gag.
* In ''WesternAnimation/{{Centurions}}'' , [[BigBad Doc Terror]] once broke out of a correctional facility using cyborg mice with little [[FireBreathingWeapon flamethrowers]].
* The heroes and villains alike in ''{{Hero 108}}'' routinely mount cannons on turtles and chameleons, respectively, and aren't above weaponizing other animals.
* In ''WesternAnimation/TheVentureBrothers'', Baron Underbeit keeps "tiger bombs" to take care of traitors.
* The cult classic ''DinoRiders'' had a race of good HumanoidAliens (possibly far-removed descendants of human space colonists) fighting a race of evil reptilian/amphibian/fishy aliens. They somehow ended up back on prehistoric Earth, and the first thing they thought to do was strap a bunch of armor and lasers and rockets to the various dinosaurs they found.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Web Original]]
* ''{{Zoofights}}'' has it right in the title.
* Though only a fan work, [[http://guarddog.50webs.com/ The Item Retrieving, Cannon-Appended Canine Unit]] [[http://www.teamfortress.com/1308.htm got recognition]] from the Team Fortress team.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Real Life]]
* The [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anti-tank_dog anti-tank dog]] is possibly the most famous and [[ThatPoorDog tragic]] real-life example.
** Version 1.0 was hilarious instead. The idea was that the dog would drop the payload under the tank, then come back, thus saving considerable expense that, in later versions, would have to be sunk into training a new dog from the ground up. The problem was that, as is usually the case with dogs, they were much smarter than the people who came up with the idea gave them credit for; they would emerge from the trenches, decide that all this gunfire nonsense was way hotter than they were willing to deal with, drop their payload right there, and return to the trench.
** There were also sometimes issues with the fact that the dogs were trained using Soviet tanks; as a result, once out in the field, they'd race straight for... well, you get the picture.
* War elephants were often equipped with huge blades on their tusks, to add even more power to [[DemonicSpiders an already hellishly dangerous fighting force.]]
** And some were trained to use a [[EpicFlail ball and chain]] with their trunks in case foot soldiers got too close.
** Speaking of war elephants, they risked becoming obsolete when cannons became widespread. So what did people do? [[http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/8f/Siamese_Elephant_Mounted_Artillery_in_Laos_1893.jpg Put cannons on the elephants.]]
** During [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Timur Tamerlane]]'s invasion of India, the Indian army, among other troops, brought 120 armor-clad elephants with poisoned tusks. Tamerlane's answer? Take all his camels, ''light them on fire'', and send the screaming beasts towards the enemy. Elephants, for their size, scare easily, and the Indian army was [[CurbStompBattle trampled by their own elephants]]. Apparently, deciding that only he was crazy enough to use this trick, Tamerlane then goes ahead and incorporates these same elephants into his own army, although he first forces them all to kneel before him.
* The US army investigated [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bat_bomb the use of bats mounted with napalm-based explosives]]. The bats were to be released over a city, find places to roost amongst the buildings, then explode, lighting countless fires. In practice, the bats were kept in hibernation until released, most didn't come out of hibernation fast enough and went splat instead.
** They had a solution for the splatting problem, involving parachuting the bats down giving them time to wake up. Still wasn't used in warfare because the atomic bomb was finished first.
* Another WW2 US military example: Pigeons are relatively well known in behavioral psychology circles for being easily programmable. That is to say, if you teach them to peck at a colored light to get food, and they will obsessively peck at that light hundreds of times a minute until they get it. This was exploited by teaching them to recognize aerial photos of ''German and Japanese warships'' and peck at them. The pigeons were then [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Project_Pigeon loaded into the nose-cones of bombs and missiles]] behind a glass screen. Their pecking would tilt the screen in the direction of the ship and steer the bomb. The test-runs worked a charm, but the military flat-out refused to use such a bizarre weapon, and the inventor went on to develop it as a way of spotting life-rafts from planes after the war (this being the days before thermal imaging).
* The US military had a program in place to train dolphins to attack enemy divers. The only real success was getting dolphins to the point of being able to disarm mines the hard way.
* More than one [[ForcedPrizeFight cockfight]] organizer has [[BloodierAndGorier livened things up]] by attaching bits of razor blade to the cockerels' spurs. [[OneThousandWaysToDie At least one organizer]] has been ''[[KarmicDeath stabbed by his own enraged bird]]'' as a result.
* According to Pliny the Elder, the ancient Romans would cover pigs in oil and light them on fire, then release them into the enemy armies. Their squealing could also spook other animals, which was especially dangerous when the enemy had elephants. (It also presumably sped up the process of serving a victory feast afterwards.) However, it's uncertain whether or not this really happened.
** It's also been claimed that Mongol and Chinese armies sometimes tied packages to camels, horses, oxen and even elephants and lighted them on fire, directing the spooked animals against the enemy and disrupting their lines. [[http://depts.washington.edu/chinaciv/miltech/firearms.htm Sometimes]] the animals would also get spears attached to take one or two soldiers with them. Need more proof that HumansAreBastards?
* During the CrimeanWar, the Russians trained pigeons to associate a person with a red coat with food. Then they tied a grenade to it and released it during a battle...
* There is at least one instance of the ancient Chinese using automatic repeating crossbows that were knocked, drawn and fired by a mechanism tied to a cart's axle. A force that had more horses than soldiers would tie horses to the carts and then attach burning rags to their tails, creating a hell-bent arrow-shooting chariot of death.
* The SpikesOfDoom of the RightHandAttackDog might be for show nowadays, but they were developed as defensive weapons in fighting and shepherd dogs since wolves and dogs instinctively try to bite their opponent in the neck.
* [[http://www.heliograph.com/trmgs/trmgs2/camel.shtml Machine Gun Camels.]]
[[/folder]]

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