->'''Peter Quill:''' I'm gonna ask you this one time... where's Gamora?\\
'''Tony Stark:''' Yeah, I'll do you one better -- WHO'S Gamora?\\
'''Drax:''' I'll do YOU one better -- WHY is Gamora?!
-->-- ''Film/AvengersInfinityWar''

In comedy, two normal items followed by a non sequitur or humorous third item. The classic example is "Can I get you anything? Cup of coffee? Doughnut? Toupee?" from ''Series/TheDickVanDykeShow'', to the point where a bumper running on Creator/NickAtNite specifically explained the structure of the joke.

Not to be confused with MyFriendsAndZoidberg, where the things listed are one or more categories, and the non sequitur is an insult to a listener who ostensibly fits one of the categories.

Informed by the RuleOfThree (two items set up a pattern, and then the third breaks it, subverting expectations and registering as funny). It helps that these things tend to be [[RapidFireComedy rapid-fire]] so that viewers have just barely noticed the pattern before the punchline hits.

[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder: [[Sub Trope Sub-tropes ]]
]]

* ArsonMurderAndAdmiration
* ArsonMurderAndJaywalking
* ArsonMurderAndLifesaving
* BreadEggsBreadedEggs
* BreadEggsMilkSquick
* ClueEvidenceAndASmokingGun
* FamousFamousFictional
* TheThreeCertaintiesInLife

----
!!Examples:

[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder:Advertising]]
* An old Sega ad had a stewardess saying, "Coffee? Tea? SEGA!"
* A State Farm commercial has an alien mecha that seems to target one person.
-->There goes Duane's car... There goes Duane's house... And there goes Duane.\\
Man, [[{{Understatement}} that thing does not like]] [[ButtMonkey Duane]].
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Anime & Manga]]
* In an episode of ''Anime/ExcelSaga'', Il Palazzo is playing a dating sim, and the third option is always [[HGame "put it in".]] [[spoiler:Excel is later seen playing the same game.]]
* A very common stock joke phrase used in Japan (and in Japanese media), typically in a "man arriving home from work" context, goes like "Would you like a bath? Or dinner? [[LampshadedDoubleEntendre Or maybe]] [[PunctuatedForEmphasis m.e.]]?"[[note]]"Ofuro ni shiyou? Gohan ni shiyou? Soretomo a~ta~shi~?"[[/note]].
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Asian Animation]]
* ''Animation/BoBoiBoy'': Papa Zola gives three rules for the football game between [=BoBoiBoy=]'s team and Fang's: don't play dirty, don't use superpower during the game, and don't toy with a man's feelings ("If you don't love him, then don't act like you love him").
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Comedy]]
* A memorable gag by comedienne Creator/RitaRudner has her ending a confusing story with "Any questions? Any answers? Anyone care for a mint?"
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Comic Books]]
* ''ComicBook/JudgeDredd'': One story where the title character is chasing after Count Dracula sees the infamous vampire run into a Hall of Horrors tourist museum, prompting the following exchange between Dredd and an employee at the exhibit.
-->'''Dredd:''' You! Close the Hall! Get everyone out! Dracula's in there!\\
'''Employee:''' 'Course he is! So's Frankenstein, the Wolfman, UsefulNotes/MargaretThatcher...
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Fan Works]]
* ''Fanfic/TheWrongReflection'': When Dalin Bastra advises Gul Morag that they could just take Eleya's data on defeating the Terran Empire's Klingon-derived cloaking devices by force, Eleya pulls one of these.
-->'''Eleya:''' First of all, in your current state the ''Bajor'' outguns both of your remaining ships put together. Second, our cyberwarfare tech is way better than yours so you'll have to physically board us. My XO has orders to erase the files if they pick up any unauthorized transporter signatures, and you'll never get a shuttle docked in one piece. Third, quit testing my patience, you moron.
* In ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7665632/18/Potter-s-Protector Potter's Protector]]'' Xander states that you should never mess with death, time or his Twinkies.
* Lampshaded in ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/2114791/30/Ghost-of-a-Memory Ghost of a Memory]]'':
-->'''James:''' My first captain called me a natural. By the way, when Harry's older, I'd like to buy him his first broom. As his godfather it's my responsibility to encourage such dangerous sports as Quidditch, duelling and dragon hunting.\\
'''Draco:''' Dragon hunting? I assure you Evans, my son is not going anywhere near a dragon until he's at least seventeen.\\
'''James:''' I needed a third activity. Replace it with pranking, if you want. That can be dangerous, especially if he tries to prank us or Severus.
* ''Fanfic/ThePalaververse'': From the first chapter of ''Wedding March'', the three names of "a great and mountainous formation of ridges and river-carved canyons", when ends on a much less threatening note:
--> Willing visitors to the formation - which was varying known as the Black Defiles, the Obvious Location of Horror and Death to be Shunned by Any Ponies With the Sense the Creator Gave a Stoat (Literal Minded was generally regarded as one of the best pony explorers of the last few centuries, albeit as good with names as polio was with infants), or Home
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Films -- Animation]]
* In ''WesternAnimation/IceAge1'', Manny to Sid: "Is there no one else that you can annoy? Friends? Family? Poisonous Reptiles?"
* A non-verbal version happens in ''WesternAnimation/KungFuPanda1''. Tai Lung is breaking out of [[TheAlcatraz Chorh-Gom Prison]], only to be confronted by Commander Vachir and his thousand rhino soldiers. A messenger duck called Zeng is also present, [[MinionMaracas clutched in Vachir's fist]] to [[BearerOfBadNews stop him flying away]]. Vachir sees Tai Lung and growls. Tai Lung growls in reply. Zeng just squeaks in terror.
* In ''WesternAnimation/BeautyAndTheBeast'', the Beast asks his servants what he can give Belle. Cogsworth immediately pipes up with the standard romantic gestures: "Flowers, chocolates, promises you don't intend to keep..." (Fun fact, this line was [[ThrowItIn improvised]] by Creator/DavidOgdenStiers).
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Films -- Live-Action]]
* ''Film/NationalLampoonsChristmasVacation'':
-->'''Clark:''' Can I refill your egg nog for you? Get you something to eat? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you for dead?
* ''Film/WorkingGirl'': "Coffee? Tea? Me?"[[note]]The line is from a 1967 book. In fact, it's the title. (Well, ''Coffee, Tea, or Me?'')[[/note]]
* ''Film/{{The Nutty Professor|1996}}'' (the Eddie Murphy one): "Anything I can get for you? Juice? Coffee? Rack of lamb?"
* ''Film/MissCongeniality'': "By the way, what are you planning to do for your talent: sing, dance, chew with your mouth closed?"
* In ''Series/TheAddamsFamily'', Morticia is clearing out a closet and finds three bags. In bag #1, "Uncle Knick-knack's Winter Wardrobe". In bag #2, "Uncle Knick-knack's Summer Wardrobe". In bag #3, "Uncle Knick-knack."
* In ''Film/HaroldAndKumarGoToWhiteCastle'': "Go on inside, boys, and make yourselves at home. You can rest up, get something to drink, fuck my wife, whatever you want. Just don't do anything the good lord wouldn't do."
* ''Film/TheXFilesFightTheFuture'': When Scully got Mulder ''big time'', it was Mulder's turn to buy them something to drink:
-->'''Scully:''' You're buying.\\
'''Mulder:''' What? Coke, Pepsi, saline IV?\\
'''Scully:''' ''[smiling]'' Something sweet.
* In ''Film/{{The Avengers|2012}}'' Tony Stark asks Bruce Banner [[YouWontLikeMeWhenImAngry how he stays calm]].
-->'''Tony:''' What's your secret? Mellow jazz, bongo drums, huge bag of weed?
* As seen in the page quote, ''Film/AvengersInfinityWar'' has Drax tack on "''Why'' is Gamora?!" after hearing "Where" and "Who" being asked -- which the actor [[ThrowItIn apparently improvised on-set]].
* Cotton [=McKnight=], the announcer from ''Film/DodgeballATrueUnderdogStory'' is rather prone to these.
-->'''Cotton:''' Tomorrow we separate the men from the boys, the wheat from the chaff, and the awkwardly feminine from the possibly Canadian.
* ''Film/AdeleHasntHadHerDinnerYet'': Countess Thun's favourite reading? Dante, Goethe, and Nick Carter's stories.[[note]]Nick Carter is a GreatDetective FamedInStory who is a real investigator, but there are also pulp magazines and books about his real solved cases. [[/note]]
* ''Film/AFairlyOddMovieGrowUpTimmyTurner'': The live-action film has Timmy's parents attempting to offer gifts to Tootie when they try to marry their son off to her:
-->'''Mr. Turner:''' We'll give you money!\\
'''Mrs. Turner:''' Livestock!\\
'''Mr. Turner:''' Raisins!
* ''Film/Dracula2000''. Jeri Ryan is playing a news reporter.
-->'''Reporter:''' ''[to her cameraman]'' Ready to go? Getting the crash? Getting the sunset? [[MsFanservice Getting the tits?]]
* In the AfterTheEnd BMovie ''Film/{{Battletruck}}'' (a.k.a. ''Warlords of the 21st Century'') the villains have just seized a village.
-->'''BigBad:''' ''[to The Dragon]'' Tell the men to Inventory and Requisition.\\
'''TheDragon:''' ''[to his Mook Lieutenant]'' Tell the men to Inventory and Requisition.\\
'''MookLieutenant:''' ''[to everyone else]'' LOOT! LOOT!
* ''Film/YoungFrankenstein'':
-->'''Frau Blucher:'''[[note]]WHINNYYYYYYYYY[[/note]] Vould the doctor care for a brandy before retiring?\\
'''Frederick:''' No, thank you.\\
'''Frau Blucher:'''[[note]] WHINNYYYYYYYYY[[/note]] Some varm milk, perhaps?\\
'''Frederick:''' No. Thank you very much. No thanks!\\
'''Frau Blucher:'''[[note]][[SchmuckBait What did you expect?]][[/note]] Ovaltine?\\
'''Frederick:''' NOTHING!
* ''Film/TheRiseOfSkywalker'' has a case where the change is not in the wording, but the delivery.
-->'''C-3PO:''' Oh my! They [[JetPack fly now!]]\\
'''Finn''': [[YouHaveGotToBeKiddingMe They fly now?]]\\
'''Poe''': [[ThisIsGonnaSuck They fly now...]]
* ''Film/ZombielandDoubleTap'' has one featuring the same sentence: ''something'' besides the main characters' car makes Columbus go "YouHaveGotToBeKiddingMe", Wichita says the same... and then the camera shows another car, whose driver, Madison (who they thought had died) gleefully says "You've got to be kidding me!" And then it turns into a Quadruple, as Tallahassee goes "You've gotta be [[PrecisionFStrike fucking]] kidding me!"
* ''Film/BicentennialMan'': When Andrew asks Sir to teach him how to tell a joke, he tries "two drinks walk into a bar", he tries a KnockKnockJoke, and then a ChickenJoke. He's only to say the punchline for the last one, but Andrew (being a LiteralMinded RobotButler) still doesn't get it.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Literature]]
* ''Literature/TheHitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy1'':
** "In those days... men were real men, women were real women, and small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri were real small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri." - ''Literature/TheHitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy1''
** "The History of every major Galactic Civilization tends to pass through three distinct and recognizable phases, those of Survival, Inquiry and Sophistication, otherwise known as the How, Why, and Where phases. For instance, the first phase is characterized by the question 'How can we eat?' the second by the question 'Why do we eat?' and the third by the question 'Where shall we have lunch?" - ''Literature/TheRestaurantAtTheEndOfTheUniverse''
*** This may qualify as a meta-Triple, composed of two straight [[RuleofThree Rules of Three]] followed by a Triple.
* The 1978 essay "The Three Most Important Things in Life" by Creator/HarlanEllison; they're sex, violence, and labor relations.
* In her book, ''Literature/EatsShootsAndLeaves'', Lynne Truss remarks that, if people went about saying "Elizabeth'r Reign," instead of "Elizabeth Her Reign," there would be "...the regrettable result of making people sound a) a bit stupid, b) a bit drunk, or c) a bit from the [[UsefulNotes/TheWestCountry West Country]]." (39)
* The book ''Literature/CoffeeTeaOrMe?'', a memoir of two airline stewardesses that was a best seller in 1969.
* The fifth chapter of ''Creator/DaveBarry's Complete Guide to Guys'' is titled "Guy Problems: The Pain. The Anguish. [[MaleRestroomEtiquette The Men's Room.]]"
* Dave Barry's column "Don't Box Me In" refers to an electric ceiling fan switch with three positions: "Low," "Medium," and "Burn Down House."
* According to the protagonist of ''[[Literature/MonsterHunterInternational Monster Hunter Alpha]]'', badass Russians only have three emotions: revenge, depression, and vodka.
* In ''Literature/UnseenAcademicals'', Glenda realizes she's fed up with the romance novels she's been reading because they're [[StrictlyFormula so boring and formulaic]]: "It's absolutely guaranteed that, for example, an exciting civil war or an invasion by trolls or even a scene with any cooking in it is not going to happen."
* The book ''Miss Nelson is Missing!'' had the titular teacher's students wonder what happened to her when she's substituted by an EvilTeacher. They suggest that she was eaten by a shark, she was sent to Mars, or least seriously of all, a swarm of angry butterflies carried off her car.
* An understated version takes place in ''Literature/TheLordOfTheRings'' in the three main recipients of Aragorn's healing touch following the Battle of Pelenor Fields. Faramir the Steward of Gondor wakes with the words, "My lord, you called me. I come." Eowyn the Shieldmaiden of Rohan awakens with, "Eomer! What joy is this?" And Merry the Hobbit wakes with, "I'm hungry. What's the time?"
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Live-Action TV]]
* GameShows: Sometimes used in questioning, with two straight choices and a third that is clearly (and often humorously) incorrect or just plain humorous. Examples included ''All New 3's A Crowd'' and ''Series/RemoteControl''.
* ''Series/Batwoman2019''. Played seriously in "Drink Me". The VillainOfTheWeek injects Batwoman with a drug to immobilize her so she can be captured by the responding Crows Security agents.
-->'''Luke:''' I'm [[RemoteVitalsMonitoring reading your stats]]. She injected you with a paralytic.
-->'''Kate:''' I got that.
-->'''Luke:''' And you have six Crows incoming.
-->'''Kate:''' I got that, too.\\
'''Luke:''' Gonna hit you with an adrenaline shot. Takes about 30 seconds to kick in.
-->'''Kate:''' ''(hearing Agent Sophie Moore coming up behind her)'' I don't got that.
** And in the following episode when Sophie starts [[DatingCatwoman Dating Batwoman]].
--->'''Batwoman:''' [[TheMasqueradeWillKillYourDatingLife How do you see this playing out]]... dinner, movie, I take you back to my cave?
--->'''Sophie:''' You have a cave?
* ''Series/{{Castle|2009}}'':
-->'''Captain Montgomery:''' Feds say he is a white male, 25 to 45 years old.\\
'''Castle:''' ''[to himself]'' Could be me.\\
'''Captain Montgomery:''' With a dysfunctional relationship with his mother.\\
'''Castle:''' Still me.\\
'''Captain Montgomery:''' He has a menial, unimportant job.\\
'''Beckett:''' [[DeadpanSnarker Definitely you.]]\\
'''Castle:''' Just for that, my next book is based on Esposito.
* ''Series/DontHugMeImScared'': During the intro song in "Friends":
-->'''Duck Guy''': And every day's a new surprise!\\
'''Yellow Guy''': When you're learning with us guys!\\
'''Red Guy''': And we live in an actual ''[[SuddenlyShouting NIGHTMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE!]]''
* In ''Series/{{Eureka}}'', Dr. Boyle lists off his grandmother's missing heirlooms after the bank is stolen. She had a gold wedding ring, a pearl necklace, [[OhCrap some antimatter...]]
* ''Series/{{Friends}}'' did a variation on this. When Rachel's pregnancy became a plot point at the beginning of season eight, Phoebe tries to figure out who the father is. When she invites the (wrong) man to the coffee house and it's revealed that, no, Tag is ''not'' the father, Phoebe is understandably embarrassed.
-->'''Phoebe:''' Can I get anyone anything? Coffee? Tea? Poison? Just me? Okay.
* In ''Series/StargateUniverse'', when Volker needs a kidney transplant:
-->'''Park:''' Still a lot of other potential post-operative drawbacks. Infection, high blood pressure, erectile dysfunction...\\
''[everyone except Volker snickers]''\\
'''Volker:''' Why is that funny?\\
''[everyone else snickers again]''
* ''Franchise/StarTrek'':
** In its various incarnations, the shows have a tendency to do this when a character is comparing someone to great artists, scientists, explorers or whatever: they will list [[FamousFamousFictional two ones from our past and an unfamiliar third]], often sounding like that of an alien. Alternately, two historical people and one contemporary. (Granted, this person may well be considered historical by their standards.) An example is when listing blind poets and going with "Homer, Dante, [[Music/StevieWonder Wonder]]."
** ''Series/StarTrekTheNextGeneration''. Amanda Rogers, an intern on ''Enterprise'', has superpowers and Q is sent to investigate.
--->'''Q:''' Very impressive the way you contained that explosion. What else have you done?\\
'''Amanda Rogers:''' I-I don't understand.\\
'''Q:''' Telekinesis? Teleportation? Spontaneous combustion of someone you don't like? ''[shoots a meaningful glance at Picard]''
** In "The Arsenal of Freedom", the crew speculate on what might have caused the {{Arms Dealer}}s [[PlanetOfHats populating Minos]] to disappear:
---> '''Worf:''' War?\\
'''Data:''' Disease?\\
'''Geordi:''' A dissatisfied customer?
** ''Series/StarTrekVoyager''. Voyager's EMH is examining Dr. Zimmerman.
--->'''EMH:''' To your knowledge, have you been exposed to theta radiation?\\
'''Zimmerman:''' No.\\
'''EMH:''' Neutron flux?\\
'''Zimmerman:''' Never.\\
'''EMH:''' Have you ever had intimate relations with a Bolian?
** In "Barge of the Dead" the crew have organised some Klingon celebrations. The EMH encourages [[IceQueen Seven of Nine]] to get into the spirit of things.
--->'''EMH:''' Think "Qapla!" Think "Long live the Empire!"\\
'''Seven:''' [[DeadpanSnarker Think again.]]
* ''Series/GameOfThrones''. Jaime Lannister is shamelessly {{troll}}ing the [[NoGuyWantsAnAmazon huge female knight]] who's holding him captive. "Have you known many men? [[LesYay Women?]] [[BestialityIsDepraved Horses?]]"
* In ''Series/TwoAndAHalfMen'', this is how others react to the news that Jake heard Judith and Herb having sex through his bedroom wall.
-->'''Alan:''' [[OhCrap Oh, boy]].\\
'''Charlie:''' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck Oh, God]].\\
'''Berta:''' [[PassThePopcorn Oh, Goodie]]!
* ''Series/RedDwarf'' has an example similar to the ''Franchise/StarTrek'' ones, where Rimmer lists some of the classical musicians as Mozart, Mendelssohn, and Music/{{Motorhead}}.
* ''Series/{{Angel}}'': "The Girl in Question"
-->'''Spike:''' The Immortal. This is what he does. Every time he shows up, I either lose my girl, get beaten by an angry mob, or get [[UndeadTaxExemption thrown in prison for tax evasion]]. ''[off Angel's look]'' [[ItsALongStory Long story.]]
* ''Series/BurnNotice''[='s=] pilot features this line when Mike and Fiona are hashing out why they broke up the last time.
-->'''Michael:''' Fi, there's a few things I'm good at: tactical analysis, hand-to-hand combat, and I'm a decent cook.
* ''Series/TheProfessionals''. In this case though the 'funny' one is actually the second example.
-->'''Cowley:''' Bodie. Doyle. Hold on a moment. World Chemical Products. Man just fell out of a seventh-storey window.\\
'''Doyle:''' That's police business.\\
'''Cowley:''' He jumped.\\
'''Bodie:''' [[BlackComedy That's his business.]]\\
'''Cowley:''' Somebody had slipped him a drug. Him and half the staff there.\\
'''Doyle:''' Well, that's, uh--\\
'''Bodie:''' --drug squad--\\
'''Doyle:''' --drug squad business.\\
'''Cowley:''' What are you two, some kind of music hall act?
* ''Series/HappyEndings'' frequently features this:
-->'''Dave:''' Hey, Pen. What's goin' on?\\
'''Penny:''' Oh, you know, standard, just cleanin' up after a slumber party. Some light dusting, dishes, chipping my unmentionables out of the freezer...\\\
'''Jane:''' ''[about Brad's father's visit]'' What kind of tests?\\
'''Brad:''' MRI, CAT scan, EKG, routine stuff.\\
'''Jane:''' Routine? Oh, yeah, sure, no, my morning routine is a cup of coffee, a mammogram and a camera up my va-Jane-a. Are you sure everything is okay?\\
'''Brad:''' Totally. If it wasn't, I'm sure he would have talked to me about it.\\
'''Jane:''' Really? Cause I kinda feel like you guys don't talk... that much.\\
''[flashback]''\\
'''Brad:''' ''[on the phone]'' 7:30... No... Scottie Pippen.\\
'''Jane:''' I mean more than just what time is the Bulls game, are you going and if you had to sleep with one Bull, who would it be?\\\
'''Pauline Blum ([[StraightGay Max]]'s mom):''' From what Max has told us, that Alex girl leaving you... that was the best thing that could have happened.\\
'''Dave:''' That's what I've been saying.\\
'''Pauline:''' Now you're free to be who you are.\\
'''Dave:''' Exactly.\\
'''Pauline:''' And find happiness with men.\\
'''Dave:''' Yes! Wait. What's that with the men thing?
* ''Series/BlakesSeven''. One of the many quotable comments of snarky AntiHero Avon.
-->'''Avon:''' I am not expendable, I am not stupid, and I am not going.
* ''Series/ThirtyRock'':
** A subtle one from Tracy: (The boat in question is not metaphorical.)
-->I've taken this boat many places. Miami. Tokyo. Denver.
** Liz has a habit of doing these. Lampshaded when she lists some of her good qualities, and the third item is, "I always think of a third thing when I'm listing stuff."
* A HarsherInHindsight one from ''Series/TheGoodies''.
-->'''Graham:''' Operator, this is an emergency! Get me the police... the army... Creator/JimmySavile! Anybody!
* ''Series/HoratioHornblower:'' In episode "Mutiny", Captain Sawyer has an interesting variation on the motto of the French revolution:
-->'''Sawyer:''' Started by that damn dangerous French revolutionary nonsense. Liberty, fraternity, stupidity.
* ''Series/ImpracticalJokers'': In the episode "Brother of the Sisterhood", in response to the question "What are your three biggest fears?" Joe is told to answer "Heights, being locked in a room with a man suffering from gigantism while a bomb slowly and inevitably ticks, and spiders".
* In the ''Series/{{Seinfeld}}'' episode "The Puerto Rican Day," Kramer, in his MockMillionaire identity as "H.E. Pennypacker," introduces himself as a "wealthy industrialist and philanthropist and uh...bicyclist."
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Myths & Religion]]
* The three "major prophets" of the [[CrossoverCosmology syncretic Cao Dai religion]] of UsefulNotes/{{Vietnam}} are Lao Tzu, Confucius and... Creator/VictorHugo.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Radio]]
* ''Series/DeadRingers:'' Andrew Neil lists the guests on his show, which inevitably are two bizarre things - e.g. Davros, creator of the Daleks, a jellyfish with an arts degree - AND DIANNE ABBOT!
* ''Radio/OurMissBrooks'' has one rapid-fire breakfast exchange with her landlady:
-->'''Miss Brooks:''' Toast?\\
'''Mrs. Davis:''' Toast.\\
'''Miss Brooks:''' Cereal?\\
'''Mrs. Davis:''' Cereal.\\
'''Miss Brooks:''' Hat-coat-and-bicarbonate?\\
'''Mrs. Davis:''' ...
* Done all the time by the Voiceover Guy for the introduction of the 1990's ''Series/TheXFiles'' spoof, ''The X Fools''.
-->''"They are two unusual agents investigating unusual mysteries: Haunted houses... UFO's... If a man climbs a mountain because it's there, why doesn't he do the washing up?"''
* Used frequently on ''Radio/WaitWaitDontTellMe'', as when they were discussing the debut of ''Inspire'', a glossy magazine especially for jihadi terrorists.
-->'''Peter Sagal:''' No longer will terrorists have to rely only on magazines like ''Car Bomb and Driver''... ''U.S. Jews and World Report''... or ''Martha Stewart Living''.
** A more conventional RuleOfThree followed:
--->'''Sagal:''' If this works there's another line of jihadi magazines ready to go: ''Better Caves and Gardens''... ''Bomb Apetit''... ''Ladies Never Leave the Home Journal''...
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Theater]]
* ''The Abduction of Figaro'' by Music/PDQBach:
-->'''[[WomanScorned Donna Donna]]''' ''(to Donald Giovanni)'': You worm! You skunk! You yellow-bellied imperialist running-dog!
* ''Theatre/SundayInTheParkWithGeorge'', "Color And Light":
-->'''George:''' More red... More blue... More beer...
* The song "I Believe" in ''Theatre/TheBookOfMormon'' is built around this structure, but interestingly the third item isn't even a joke, technically, but rather a real Mormon belief that just sounds really bizarre out of context.
-->''I believe that the Lord God created the universe. I believe that he sent his only son to die for my sins. And I believe that ancient Jews built boats and sailed to America...''
* ''Theatre/TheBibleTheCompleteWordOfGodAbridged'' explains that the Letters basically teach three things: "Love the Lord thy God"; "Love thy neighbor as thyself"; and "Women: you're responsible for the downfall of mankind, so shut up and obey your husbands."
* ''Tenderloin'' has one with a pun at the end of "What's In It For You?":
-->'''Tommy:''' You're deep.\\
'''Brock:''' You're shrewd.\\
'''Both:''' Your move.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Video Games]]
* The intro cinematic of ''Videogame/DeathSpank'' promises "a tale of [[BloodyHilarious blood]], and [[SwordTropes steel]], and ''bacon''!"
* The backstory for ''Pigskin 621 A.D.'', as presented in the Player's Handbook, is captioned: "Before Football, Before Rugby, Before Bubonic Plague..."
* ''VideoGame/Portal2:''
-->'''KNOW YOUR ALLERGENS:''' Pollen. Animal dander. Plastics. Antimatter.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Web Animation]]
* ''WebAnimation/{{Arfenhouse}} Teh Movie Too'':
-->"TOMAYTOOZ!!!!" ''[whap]''\\
"[=K0RNN!!11!1!!!!=]" ''[whap]''\\
"[[RayGun LAYYZDR GNU!!!!!!!]]" ''[pewpewpew]''
* In ''WebAnimation/TheLazerCollection 3'' a gritty new detective comments that a detail of the case he was assigned is, quote, odd. This launches his senior officer into a mini-rant.
-->'''Senior Officer:''' Odd? Odd is Benjamin Franklin playing tetherball with Van Helsing. Odd is a big-toed tadpole tainted by the tides of a dawn since past. Odd is a 40-year-old senior officer who cries himself to sleep every night dreaming of a life on the road as a traveling naked contortionist, never returning home, never stopping or breaking his stride! ... Unless he saw a TGI Fridays. He [[SoundEffectBleep f**king]] loves that place.\\
'''Detective Randall:''' ''[stare]''\\
'''Senior Officer:''' This isn't odd, Randall. This... is a mystery.
* ''WebAnimation/StupidKids'': Bazsi wants to go inside the kitchen but Boti builds a border there and asks for an ID card, a passport and a red rubber ball from him in ''Ahol a méreg sem segít'' (''Where even poison does not help'').
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Web Comics]]
* ''Webcomic/TheOrderOfTheStick'':
** In [[http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0709.html #709]], Tsukiko complains about how Paladins forbid things left and right: "Don't walk on the grass, don't litter, don't rape the cycle of life with your unclean power."
** Also, [[http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0020.html #20]]: "Fireball!" "Arrrgh!" "Lightning Bolt!" "Arrrgh!" "Evan's Spiked Tentacles of Forced Intrusion!" "Wait, what? --AAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHH!!!"
** ''Start of Darkness'' has the Unholy Master ready to choose his new second-in-command:
--->'''Unholy Master:''' Will it be: The wizard Yydranna?\\
'''Yydranna:''' Darkness is my ally.\\
'''Unholy Master:''' The sorcerer Xykon?\\
'''Xykon:''' The dead are mine to command.\\
'''Unholy Master:''' Or two-time Origins-Award-winning game designer Keith Baker?\\
'''Keith Baker:''' You know, I'm not really evil, per se. I'm just here to promote my card game, TabletopGame/{{Gloom}}™.
* [[http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=1483 This]] ''Webcomic/QuestionableContent'':
-->'''Marigold:''' Large Phillips screwdriver.\\
'''Momo:''' Large Phillips screwdriver.\\
'''Marigold:''' Thermal paste.\\
'''Momo:''' Thermal paste.\\
'''Marigold:''' Squirrel.\\
[...]\\
'''Momo:''' S-SQUIRELL!\\
'''Marigold:''' I was... I was joking!
* From ''Webcomic/CrimsonDark'', [[http://www.davidcsimon.com/crimsondark/index.php?view=comic&strip_id=42 Chapter 01: Page 22]]. Kari takes control of the ''Niobe's'' guns as the enemy closes in. Doubles as a PreMortemOneLiner.
-->'''Kari:''' Sorry, guys, but this is what happens when you destroy my ship, kill my friends, come after my rescuers, and ''fly level while in formation''.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Web Original]]
* When Tweeterman287 [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4lxXpayJme0 reviewed a handheld game console]], he said (holding up each object in turn) "Rapid-fire size comparison so you can get an idea of the size of this in RealLife. Platform/XBox360 controller, [[Platform/PlayStationPortable PSP-3000]], and a turtle made out of clay."
* [[http://www.cracked.com/article_18611_the-10-most-important-things-they-didnt-teach-you-in-school.html According]] to Website/{{Cracked}}, success depends on three things: Talent, hard work, and [[LuckBasedMission randomly]] meeting the right people and not pissing them off.
* ''WebVideo/FreemansMind'' has an episode where he yells to a vortigaunt alien:
-->'''Freeman:''' You stay on your side of the line! Your side of the line is where everyone is dead. My side of the line is filled with love, hope, and sub-machine guns!
* ''Blog/WhatIf'': The first image of [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/51/ "Free Fall"]] labels the parts of Mount Thor with "East Slope", "Summit", and "AAAAAAAAAAAAA" (pointing at the sheer cliff).
* A meme comparing different generations' humor styles goes like so:
--> '''Boomer:''' [[AwfulWeddedLife I hate my wife!]]\\
'''Millennial:''' [[SelfDeprecation I hate my life!]]\\
'''Gen Z:''' ''[=[=][[SurrealHumor Image macro of an elongated dog surrounding a kneeling man, shouting "Where are my balls John?"]][=]=]''
* ''WebVideo/RivalsDirect'' 3 has a few gags of this sort relating to class names:
** Aether University's top-rated classes are Psychology, Cryptozoology, Applied Astrology, and Taxidermy.
** Clairen's classes are Aetherian History, Abyssthrapology, Sylvan Expressionism, Hyperborean Philosophy, and Math 2.
* From WebVideo/ScottTheWoz's deep dive of ''VideoGame/SuperSmashBros64'':
-->'''Scott''': ''VideoGame/SuperSmashBros'', the most prolific crossover series on the planet, allowing you to pit Nintendo and gaming icons against each other. Mario versus Link, Samus versus Kirby, [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brown_v._Board_of_Education Brown versus Board of Education]]...
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Western Animation]]
* ''WesternAnimation/AaahhRealMonsters'': In "The Ickis Box", The Gromble scolds Ickis for getting distracted by human TV programs during a scare at an electronics store.
-->'''The Gromble:''' You were snapping your fingers! You were tapping your toes! You were ''[[ShakingTheRump shaking your groove-thing!]]''
* ''WesternAnimation/{{Animaniacs}}'':
** [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fjQKNDtdtt8 Coffee? Tea? Monster?]] And yes, [[CrazyPrepared Dot did have a monster on hand for that purpose]], and [[SchmuckBait someone did ask for it.]]
** In "Sir Yaksalot": "Candy? Gum? Dynamite?"
** The PowerTrio of the Warner Siblings are pretty much designed to deliver this kind of punchline. For example, in "The Taming of the Screwy" when they're excited about getting to meet famous actors:
--->'''Yakko:''' Creator/MichellePfeiffer!
--->'''Dot:''' Creator/MelGibson!
--->'''Wakko:''' Creator/DonKnotts!
* ''WesternAnimation/DarkwingDuck'': A more serious example occurs in "[[Recap/DarkwingDuckS3E4StarCrossedCircuits Star-Crossed Circuits]]"; when Launchpad tells Darkwing [[JobStealingRobot he doesn't think he's any use to him with the D-2000 around]], Darkwing takes exception. Launchpad asks for a example, and Darkwing brings up [[CoolPlane the Thunderquack]] and lifting heavy boxes (before remembering that [[DoAnythingRobot the D-2000]] can do that as well). His last suggestion is singing show tunes — but he immediately shuts Launchpad down when he actually tries to perform them.
* A Triple combined with a JuliusBeethovenDaVinci from ''WesternAnimation/{{Futurama}}'':
-->'''Calculon:''' I was all of history's great acting robots; Acting Unit 0.8, Thespomat, Creator/DavidDuchovny.
* ''WesternAnimation/TheFairlyOddParents'' episode in which Mr. Crocker first appeared has this:
-->'''Crocker:''' Can I offer you anything with that? Cream, sugar, magic?\\
'''Wanda:''' What was that last one?\\
'''Crocker:''' ''[unsure]'' Sugar?
* ''WesternAnimation/FamilyGuy'': In "Holy Crap", after Peter tells Lois that his father [[ActivistFundamentalistAntics Francis]], who he just got made president of the factory he works at, is turning the break room into a chapel:
-->'''Lois''': Where will you all eat lunch?\\
'''Peter''': Lois, lunch is a sin. Taking a break is a sin. [[BestialityIsDepraved Bestiality is a sin.]] [[LampshadeHanging I'm not sure how that came up exactly...]]
* In one episode of ''WesternAnimation/AmericanDragonJakeLong'', when Spud and Trixie are looking over Lao Shi's store while he and Jake are away, Fu Dog tells them not to touch anything, not to open any drawers, and if [[EvilDebtCollector a big toothless guy named Morty showed up saying "Where's the money?"]], they were to tell him Fu had moved to Machu Picchu.
* Some episodes of ''WesternAnimation/RogerRamjet'' do this during the fight scenes where all that is flashed on screen are sound effect words like "Bam," "Pow" and "Ouch." In one episode the word "indigestion" turns up.
* Played with on ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'', after Krusty gets fired:
-->'''Krusty:''' They took my dressing room, my parking space, even my writer, so I don't have a funny third item.
* ''WesternAnimation/{{Rugrats}}'':
** In one episode, Angelica has a list of things she needs before she can examine Chucky.
--->'''Angelica:''' Lil, I'm going to need a box of cookies, about a hundred Band-Aids, some water, and a helicopter!\\
'''Lil:''' Where am I gonna get a box of cookies?
** The episode "Grandpa's Date" has this well-known example when Grandpa is babysitting Tommy and Chuckie.
--->'''Grandpa:''' I rented you boys some movies. ''Reptar Come Home'', ''Reptar Redux'', and my personal favorite, ''[[DemographicallyInappropriateHumour Lonely Space Vixens]]''. Uh, that's for after you go to bed.
* In ''WesternAnimation/BuzzLightyearOfStarCommand'', Buzz is thrown into the far future ([[spoiler:it's actually a trick]]) and sees what became of his team:
-->'''Buzz:''' Commander Booster... President Nova... XR... with a mustache.
* In ''WesternAnimation/TaleSpin'', Shere Khan questions his employees as to how they're investing their budgets. The first two suggest petroleum and electronics...and then the third one is glow-in-the-dark sunglasses.
* In the ''WesternAnimation/AmericanDad'' episode "Red October Sky", when Stan is looking for a former KGB agent, his guesses to where he might be are Cuba, China, and back in time to kill Betsy Ross.
* ''WesternAnimation/MuchaLucha'' has the principles that Masked Wrestling is founded upon: Honor, Family, Tradition and Donuts.
* In the finale of ''WesternAnimation/GravityFalls'', Dipper and Mabel rally the townspeople with a rousing speech where they claim that they can win if they combine all of their strengths, their smarts, and...whatever it is Toby Determined has.
--> '''Toby''': Various rashes!
* ''WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic'': In "Dragonshy", Rainbow Dash gets tired of her friends' failed attempts to gently convince a napping dragon to move further from Ponyville.
-->'''Rainbow Dash:''' Alright, that's it! We've tried persuasion... charm... whatever it is Pinkie Pie does...
* In ''WesternAnimation/MiloMurphysLaw'', when the main character is described as "[[TheJinx whatever the opposite of a rabbit's foot is]]":
-->'''Milo:''' A rabbit's ''head?''
-->'''Melissa:''' A fox's foot?
-->'''[[{{Cloudcuckoolander}} Milo]]:''' [[NonSequitur A pound of sugar?]]
* ''WesternAnimation/YoungJustice2010''. Beast Boy demands proof that Impulse comes from the future.
-->'''Beast Boy:''' Tell us something we don't know--yet! When do I become leader of the team? When do I join the Justice League? When do I get my own reality series?
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Real Life]]
* [[http://www.news.com.au/breaking-news/skinny-jeans-adult-films-human-excrement-sell-like-hot-cakes-in-north-korea/story-e6frfku0-1225977652099 This article.]] "Skinny jeans, adult films, human excrement sell 'like hot cakes' in North Korea"
* During the 2008 Democratic primaries, when UsefulNotes/BarackObama, UsefulNotes/HillaryRodhamClinton, and John Edwards were the three candidates left in the race, Obama mentioned in one of the debates how historic a time it was, because it included the first African American final contender for the presidential campaign, the first woman, and John.
* Writer Michael Dare [[https://web.archive.org/web/20050205094258/http://www.disinfotainmenttoday.com:80/darenet/animania.htm says that]] ''Westernanimation/{{Animaniacs}}'' showrunner Peter Hastings only accepted to have a meeting with him after sending a humorous "possible reasons for not responding" list. Among the items are "Your music is nice but your lyrics suck", "Your lyrics are nice but your music sucks" and "[[BreadEggsMilkSquick Your sucking is nice but your lyrics aren't musical.]]"
[[/folder]]
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