->''"Did you ever notice how men leave the toilet seat up? [{{beat}}] [ChirpingCrickets] ...That's the joke."''
-->-- '''[=McBain=]''', ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'', "[[Recap/TheSimpsonsS6E18AStarIsBurns A Star is Burns]]"

The stand-up comedy shticks that've been used, referenced, parodied, and satirized so much that they're tropes of their own, and possibly even cliches. Overlaps with StockPhrases and AcceptableTargets to some extent.

Often a case of SeinfeldIsUnfunny ([[TropeNamer literally]], in some cases) if a perfectly serviceable joke is ruined by sheer overexposure. Others fall victim to ValuesDissonance (see: most racial humour). May also be {{Outside Joke}}s if they're based solely on the listener's ignorance. Often cause listeners to think, "NeverHeardThatOneBefore!"

Another form is BottomOfTheBarrelJoke, when the comedian uses a raunchy or off-color remark as low-effort "humor."

Even if it's followed with a {{Rimshot}}, [[ToughRoom unruly audiences]] have been known to respond with a CollectiveGroan, or, if the comedian keeps it up too long, ProducePelting.

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!!Shticks:

* Starting off an act with "I just flew in from ______, and boy are my arms tired!"
* "A funny thing happened to me on the way to..."
* [[SeinfeldIsUnfunny "What's the deal with airline food?"]]
** "Why are the peanuts so hard to get into?"
** "[[PattonOswalt The food on airlines is BULLSHIT!]]"
** While [[NeverLiveItDown it's associated with him]], Seinfeld himself only ever did that shtick to make fun of how cliched it was.
* [[WhiteDudeBlackDude "White people go like this, but black people go like this!]]"
** The nasal white-guy voice that black comics use.
*** Latino comics go even further, making white men sound effeminate, or even [[CampGay gay]].
** "White people have no sense of rhythm."
** "[[{{Futurama}} The people under the yellow sun be like this, while the people under the red sun be like this!]]"
** "When I order fast food, nobody speaks English!"
* "How does the man who drives the snowplow get to work in the morning?"
* "Why does my VCR always flash '12:00'?" (Reason: You're an idiot who can't comprehend simple procedures.)
** [[TheSimpsons Krusty the clown]] lampshades this (and the airline peanuts example above) during an act where he bashes his fellow standup comedians.
-->'''Krusty''': I can't program my VCR, I can't open a bag of airline peanuts, I'm a freaking ''moron!''
* "Why are there instructions in Braille on the drive-through ATM's?" (Actual reason: they use the same interface as the walk-up [=ATMs=]. Not to mention blind people can sit behind the driver and be driven to the ATM.)
* [[RunningGag "What's the deal with airline food?"]]
* "[[MarsAndVenusGenderContrast I just can't understand women at all. No guy can.]]"
* "All men are stupid." (oddly, this is mostly used by male comedians, notably Creator/TimAllen)
** [[DirectionlessDriver "Men don't ask for directions."]]
** "Men are simple; women are complex."
** Parodied in TheSimpsons with Rainier "[=McBain=]" Wolfcastle's "Why do men leave the toilet seat up?...[[DontExplainTheJoke That's the joke]]."
* "[[PsychoExGirlfriend My ex-(boyfriend|girlfriend|husband|wife) is a (bastard|bitch).]]"
* "[[RussianReversal In Soviet Russia]], comedy stands you up!" (originally the shtick of Yakov Smirnoff)
* "Kids these days..."
** "The music these kids listen to..."
** "Kids are so spoiled with all these electronic toys..."
** "Have you seen the clothes these kids wear?"
** "Bike helmets and seatbelts and sunscreen are garbage! When I was a kid..."
* "Hollywood is so messed up- sex is rated R or X/NC-17, and explosions are fun for kids!"
* "[[OutsideJoke Why don't they just make the planes out of the black box material?]]" [[labelnote:Because...]]It would be too heavy to fly, and an unbreakable plane [[NotTheFallThatKillsYou wouldn't help all those poor breakable folks inside anyway]].[[/labelnote]]
** This joke has the dubious distinction of being so dumb and overused that DouglasAdams claims it made him want to never write comedy again.
* "If [[Series/GilligansIsland the Professor]] could build a radio transmitter out of [[BambooTechnology bamboo and coconuts]], why couldn't he fix the damn boat?" [[labelnote:note]]In an early episode, he almost did fix it, but the glue he used caused the entire boat to fall to pieces--so after that, fixing it was no longer an option. And [[JustEatGilligan guess whose fault it was]]?[[/labelnote]]
** It would have ended the series.
* Parodied in ''WebAnimation/HomestarRunner'': [[http://www.homestarrunner.com/ween04.html Women can't drive!]]
* Pretending to explain the joke to someone in the front row.
** Soaking up as much applause as possible, commenting that it helps stretch out their act (which stretches out their act even more).
* "How do you like my clothes/hairstyle?" (while sporting an OutdatedOutfit or bad hair)
* "The people in the religion I was brought up with are INSANE."
* "The people in my race or ethnic group are INSANE."
* "The people in my part of the country are INSANE."
* "Take my wife... ''please!''"
** Which is so famous ''as'' a Stock Shtick that it's possible to forget that it was originally meant to sound like it means "my wife, for example", and some people seem to think it's an example of an OrphanedPunchline.
* "Marriage is an institution, but who wants to live in an institution?" Though attributed to Groucho Marx on many sites, it's really an old vaudeville joke that was overused to death.
* [[ObnoxiousInLaws Interfering mothers-in-law]] as AcceptableTargets.
--> '''Creator/JasperCarrott:''' I don't like the whole tired old comedy schtick about mothers-in-law. I get on very well with mine. In fact I've just bought her a house. [[DoubleSubversion In Iran]].
* "But seriously, [[WesternAnimation/PhineasAndFerb what's the deal with airline food?]]"
* "... and then I got off the bus", otherwise known as 'pull back and reveal'. [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2j9yBOXyPVc Deconstructed]] by Lee and Herring.
* A ComicStrip/{{Dilbert}} cartoon referenced StockShticks when Dilbert entered a stand-up competition 'with the mandatory categories; UsefulNotes/DanQuayle, Flatulence and the [[MattressTagGag warning labels on mattresses]]'
* Speaking of which: [[MattressTagGag the warning labels on mattresses]].
* "Thank you, ladies and gentlemen, I'll be here all week." Said after a joke that didn't go over.
* Kids saying the darndest things. Summed up by StewartLee as "Some of the things kids say are mad though. It's like they can only understand the world from the perspective of a child"
* "Why are cabbies such bad drivers? And why are they all Middle Eastern or South Asian immigrants?"
* A comedian starting their act with 'I'm [name of comic], just in case you were thinking that [name of other celebrity that comic resembles] has let themselves go recently'
* "So, did you hear about [[BuffySpeak this [insert news story or pop-culture phenomenon] thing]]?" (Done to death by Jimmy Vulmer on ''WesternAnimation/SouthPark'': "Did you see this? Did you hear about this?")
* "Anybody here from out of town?"
** "''[[ComicStrip/{{Garfield}} Anybody]]'' here?!"
* "So a guy walks into a bar..."
** [[LiteralMinded "He says, 'Ow.' "]]
* [[WhiteDudeBlackDude "A priest and a rabbi..."]]
* DirectionlessDriver
* Stock heckler putdowns include:
** "I remember my first drink as well"
** "It's a shame when cousins marry"
** "There's a bus leaving in ten minutes time, why don't you be under it?"
*** "[[Series/TheGoldenGirls There's a man leaving in ten minutes. Be under him.]]"
** "Looks like there's a village missing its idiot"
** "I've heard better jokes from [inanimate object/animal/unintelligent person/something the heckler doesn't like]!"
* AwfulWeddedLife
* [[OverusedRunningGag Seriously, what is it with airline food?]]
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->''({{Rimshot}})''
-> [[TheStinger Thank you! I'll be here all night, folks!]]
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