[[quoteright:241:[[Webcomic/ThreePanelSoul http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/3ps_doubly_happy.png]]]]
[[caption-width-right:241:[[Creator/BillEngvall "Here's]] [[AskAStupidQuestion your sign."]]]]

->''"Yeah. That is a gun in my pants. But that doesn't mean I'm '''not''' happy to see you..."''
-->-- '''SelfDemonstrating/{{Deadpool}}'''

Bob is a private detective. He's sitting in his office and waiting to meet his client, Alice. Bob has never met Alice in person before; he's only spoken to her on the phone. He has seen a picture of her before and, well, he… likes what he sees. The door to his office opens and he [[DoubleEntendre stands up]]. In walks Alice. Alice is extremely beautiful in a GaussianGirl or HelloNurse sort of way. Bob tries to [[DoubleEntendre keep his excitement down]] at meeting this gorgeous woman and tries to remain all business. Alice, however, is all too aware of the sort of the effect she has on men. Noticing the look on Bob's face--and Bob's ''pants''--she offers a sweet, sultry smile, and says, "Why detective, is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"

A clever line originating from early Hollywood sex symbol Creator/MaeWest, has now become a [[StockPhrase stock innuendo]] uttered by flirty women ([[HoYay or, occasionally, men]]). It's been said so much in media that subversions are more common; something else in his pants.

While the specific line just happens to be from Creator/MaeWest, this one is arguably OlderThanFeudalism:

->'''Herald:''' I am a herald, of course, I swear I am, and I come from Sparta about making peace.\\
'''Magistrate:''' But look, you are hiding a lance under your clothes, surely.
-->-- ''Theatre/{{Lysistrata}}'', Creator/{{Aristophanes}}, 411 BC

See also SomethingElseAlsoRises, DoubleEntendre, ThatsWhatSheSaid. For when it really is a gun in their pocket, see TrouserSpace or PhallicWeapon.



[[folder:Anime & Manga]]
* Inverted in the second volume of ''Manga/TheKindaichiCaseFiles'': Miyuki, wearing a low-cut dress, crouches down in front of Kindaichi, giving him [[{{Fanservice}} a good look at her cleavage]]. As she stands up, she notices his reaction and scolds him for keeping stuff in his suit pockets.
* After Sechs gets a male body in ''[[Manga/{{Gunnm}} Battle Angel Alita: Last Order]]'', the team's Deckman servant greets him with this line.
* Done in the infamous ''Anime/CodeGeass'' swimsuit Picture Drama. Cornelia's bodyguards Guilford and Darlton are standing watch as Cornelia and Euphemia try on swimsuits, with a lot of suggestive dialog. Immediately afterwards, we see Guilford looking down as he asks Darlton if that's really the best place to store his handgun (we later see that he's in a Speedo).
* In episode 8 of the ''LightNovel/ShakuganNoShana'' parody ''Shakugan no Shana-tan'', Wilhelmina and Margery are recast as prostitutes in a brothel Sabrac visits. Margery gets excited at how "large" he is down there, but he says it is the .44 Magnum in his pants.

* A variation from ''Comicbook/WhateverHappenedToTheManOfTomorrow?''
-->'''Hooker:''' I could break your heart for $50.\\
'''Metallo:''' ''(Rips open shirt to reveal a grappling hook where his heart should be)'' I doubt it.
* ''Comicbook/CableAndDeadpool'':
** Lampshaded:
--->'''Cable:''' Did you go to a bar with a ''grenade'' in your pocket?\\
'''Deadpool:''' Or am I just happy to see you?
** Played with again in an issue of a later volume after taking a GroinAttack which hurt Black Widow (the blonde one, Yelena Belova[[spoiler:, actually Natasha Romanoff working undercover in Norman Osborn's Thunderbolts]]) as well. See the Page Quote. Cue Black Widow trying to hold laughter in.
* An issue of DC Comics's series ''Comicbook/YoungJustice'' featured Superboy, Robin and Impluse at a Halloween party. A cheerleader flirts with Robin asking if he has a Batarang in his pocket, or if he's just happy to see her. He responses "Um, I'm [[LoveYouAndEverybody happy to see everyone here…]]"
* In ''Comicbook/TopTen'', after getting knocked into Dust Devil, Jackie Phantom says "That had better be a derringer in your pocket," to which Dust Devil replies, looking insulted, "Derringer?"
* In ''[[ComicBook/EarthX Universe X]]'', Venom (Mayday Parker) and dad [[SpiderMan Spidey]] are out of the fight with a gigantic Absorbing Man due to being hopelessly outclassed (he's taken on the attributes of ''Manhattan itself'' and is taller than the city skyline), so Spidey coaches her on one-liners "to make everyone think we have a plan". She finishes up with "Is that the Chrysler Building in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?" Everyone glares at them for making light of the catastrophe, and Peter responds with "Damn. We're in ''that'' much trouble?"
* Inverted variaton in ''Soeur Marie-Therese'':
-->'''Camille:''' ''(Not wearing any pants)'' I'm so happy to see you!\\
'''Marie-Therese:''' Yes, I've noticed.
* When ComicBook/BlackCanary and ComicBook/{{Zatanna}} see Franchise/JusticeLeague action figures in a toy store, Zatanna teases her friend by making the Black Canary and Green Arrow action figures talk to each other in [[BowChickaWowWow cheesy porn movie dialogue]]. In particular, "Black Canary" uses "Is that an arrow in your quiver or are you just happy to see me."

[[folder:Fan Works]]
* No, it never does occur in ''Literature/HarryPotter.'' but as Makani demonstrates, [[http://makani.deviantart.com/art/harry-and-ginny-that-one-part-29065414 it should have.]]
* Mai said it concerning a Lightforce Sword in ''WebVideo/YuGiOhTheAbridgedSeries''.
* Inverted and subverted in the same line in ''WebVideo/YuGiOhGXTheAbridgedSeries''.
-->'''Alexis''': Is that an erection in your pocket or are you just a tennis ball?
* This seems to be a theme in ''Series/DoctorWho'' fanfiction; of course, the [[PowerPerversionPotential potential unconventional uses]] for sonic screwdrivers don't really help.
* Subverted with [[http://vanhinck.deviantart.com/art/Nice-Girls-Don-t-Date-Psychos-103792231?offset=0 this]] picture of SelfDemonstrating/TheJoker.
* Parodied in ''Fanfic/KyonBigDamnHero'', after [[spoiler:Kyon gets a new phone/PDA made from Ryouko's leftover data]]. Whilst the phone was still in his hand, this was said:
-->'''Tsuruya''': Is that the end of the world in your hand or are you just happy to see us?
* [[http://cosmicduckling.com/spirk/Kissing_by_Farf.jpg This]] ''Franchise/StarTrek'' drawing.
* In the ''Manga/DeathNote'' fic ''FanFic/FeverDreams'':
-->'''Light:''' You're hard.\\
'''L''' (thinking): No, I'm not. That's just the gun in my pocket.
* In ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6624252/12/Nocturnal Nocturnal]]'' Dumbledore tells Ron a story of which this is the OrphanedPunchline.
-->'''Dumbledore:''' …so then the Countess asked, "Is that your wand, Albus, or are you just happy to see me?"
* This ''Franchise/StarWars'' parody ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/2453328/1/Attack-of-the-Lightsabers Attack of the Lightsabers]]'' goes way overboard on the "Is that a lightsaber in your pocket…" jokes.
* Mara Jade uses the line on Luke in ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6852405/7/Fireworks-of-the-Soul-Series FIreworks of The Soul Series]]'' vignette "Jedi Luke-Meet Dancer Arica".
* In a fan fiction of ''Series/StarTrekEnterprise'' entitled "Confusion", Malcolm says to Hoshi, "Is that your universal translator or are you just glad to see me?". The only trouble is, Hoshi's a woman, both in the fan fiction and in the series, so that joke doesn't really make much sense.

* "Is that a pistol in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?", supposedly said by Creator/MaeWest at the railway station in Los Angeles upon her return from Chicago, when a Los Angeles police officer was assigned to escort her home in 1936. She delivered the line on film to George Hamilton in her last movie, ''Film/{{Sextette}}'' (1978).
* ''Film/ItsPat'': When asked if Pat has a banana in a pocket, or are you just happy to see me, Pat simply whips out a banana and says "I, uh, have a banana in my pocket."
* ''Film/WhoFramedRogerRabbit'': When Eddie is rather obviously hiding Roger underneath his trenchcoat, Dolores sarcastically asks "Is that a rabbit in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?" Eddie immediately ask her to "cut the comedy".
* An interesting use in ''Film/AceVenturaPetDetective'': First Ace feels what he thinks is a gun while Lois Einhorn tries to seduce him, and points it out ("Your gun is digging into my hip."). But later, when he learns [[GenderBender who Einhorn really is]], Ace gets promptly {{squick}}ed and begins to cry "It wasn't a gun! ''It wasn't a gun!''", with the Boy George song [[AllThereIsToKnowAboutTheCryingGame "The Crying Game"]] playing in the background.
** When he originally asked that, Lois responded, "Don't you want me to read you your rights?"
** Made even more hilarious if you speak any German, as "Einhorn" means "Unicorn" or, literally, "one horn".
* From ''Film/ThePirateMovie'': "Is that a knife in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?" It turned out to be a knife that the pirate threw into the wall before demonstrating that he was indeed glad to see her.
* Used in ''Film/BlazingSaddles'' by Lily von Shtup, unsurprisingly. "Is that a ten-gallon hat, or are you just enjoying the show?"
** [[BiggusDickus "Oh, it is]] [[ElmuhFuddSyndwome twue!"]] This would have been a subversion, if the censors hadn't objected to the next line: "You're sucking on my elbow."
* ''Film/AmericasSweethearts'': During a dream sequence, we get this conversation between the ex-sweethearts: "Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?" "Actually, it's a gun." *shoots her repeatedly*
* Done in the Eddie Murphy remake of ''Film/TheNuttyProfessor'', by the main character's JerkAss alter ego. *hugs older woman from behind* "Is that a test tube in my pocket, or am I just happy to see you?"
* Used for HoYay in ''Film/TheBigRedOne''. Two soldiers are sleeping close to each other.
-->"Zeff, quit pockin' me with your rifle."\\
"That's not my rifle, Johnson."
* In ''The Chaperone'', Wrestling/TripleH's character hugs a man, then says in disgust, "That had ''better'' be your fanny pack."
* In ''Film/{{Machete}}'', the [[ShamelessFanserviceGirl naked woman]] in the opening feels Machete's pants and asks, "What is this ''long'', ''hard'' thing?" He answers, "My machete." It is.
* ''Film/{{Red}} 2''. A Korean hitman is shooting at Frank Moss and Marvin Boggs with a [[GatlingGood mini-gatling]]. Frank hugs the pavement as vehicles are chewed to pieces around him, only to find [[HoYay Marvin clutching him tightly]] for equally ineffectual cover.
-->'''Frank:''' Marvin, is that a stick of dynamite in your pocket?\\
'''Marvin:''' Yeah, but I'm saving it for an emergency.\\
'''Frank:''' Well, this is kinda an emergency, isn't it?
* Done without the line in ''Film/{{Hotel}}'' Creator/PaulMcGann's character is seen with a gigantic bulge in his itty bitty bicycle shorts; it turns out to be a chain lock for his bicycle.
* An awkward moment for Nick in ''Film/YouthInRevolt''. He sits on Sheeni while rubbing some suncream on her back.
-->'''Sheeni''': Hm, you get turned on easily. [Nick freezes] Don't stop, Nick. It's only natural. Girls are fortunate in that it doesn't show. [As he continues] For all the world knows, my vagina could be moist with desire as we speak.
* In ''Film/{{Ted}}'', when John and Lori are getting intimate at one point, she coyly asks if he has a Flash Gordon laser gun in his pocket. Turns out he does. She laughs and they continue.

* ''Literature/{{Discworld}}'' has the old Troll pickup line, mentioned in ''Discworld/MovingPictures'', "Is that the legendary Sceptre of Magma who was King of the Mountain, Smiter of Thousands, Yea, Even Tens of Thousands, Ruler of the Golden River, Master of the Bridges, Delver in Dark Places, Crusher of Many Enemies *takes a breath* in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?" The line is thankfully [[TranslationYes a lot more snappy in the original trollish.]]
* ''Literature/{{Dragaera}}'': Cawti, visiting Vlad Taltos in his bedroom, noticed a bulge in the blanket and asked, "Is that a knife in your hand, or are you happy to see me?" Vlad answered truthfully, "Both."
* In a moment that's a beautiful microcosm of the ''Literature/DresdenFiles '' series of as a whole, Elaine, Harry's former girlfriend that he spent most of his life thinking he'd killed, returns suddenly with a "Hello Harry, is that a wand in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?" Magic, noir mystery, Harry being a nerd, and Jim Butcher's fantastic sense of humor, all in one line.
* An innocent variation in Literature/{{Animorphs}}: Morphing is a painless process, so Rachel is surprised when she starts feeling pain during the process of going from seagull to human.
-->There was a pain in my back and I had this jolt of fear. Was I feeling the morphing itself? The Andalite morphing technology keeps that from happening, but was it failing somehow? The pain was pretty severe, like the pressure of a… well, of a knee being driven into my back.\\
"Jake, do you have your knee in--"
* ''The Bronze Horsemen'' by Paullina Simons. When Captain Belov decides to [[InsatiableNewlyweds consummate his marriage]] to Tatiana, the following dialogue occurs.
-->"Do you feel me, pressing against your hip?"\\
"Mmmm; I thought that was your rifle."\\
"Whatever you want to call it is fine by me."
* ''[[Literature/JohnRain The Detachment]]''. Dox releases a teenaged girl [[IHaveYourWife they're holding hostage]] and is [[AMatchMadeInStockholm uncomfortable with how much he enjoys being hugged by her in gratitude]]. There's a gun tucked [[PantsPositiveSafety into his front waistband]], so he thinks that it will do as an [[PhallicWeapon appropriate metaphor]].

[[folder:Live Action TV]]
* A subversion from ''Series/{{Scrubs}}''
-->'''Gift Shop Girl:''' Is that a roll of quarters in your pocket, or are you just having a really good time?\\
'''J.D.:''' Actually it ''is'' a roll of quarters. ''(takes it out and shrugs awkwardly)'' Laundry day…
* ''Series/TheXFiles'':
** The episode "Hollywood A.D.", the on-screen adaptations of Mulder and Scully have a moment. They roll into a coffin together, and Scully asks whether it's his flashlight or if he's just happy with their position. The joke is further extended when the movie Scully tells Mulder she's in love with A.D. Skinner. When asked by Mulder what Skinner has that he doesn't, Scully answers "bigger flashlight".
--->'''Movie Scully:''' Is that your flashlight, Mulder, or are you just happy to be laying on top of me?\\
'''Movie Mulder:''' My flashlight.
** A deleted scene from the episode "Home" has the subversion when it's really an object in his pocket. Taken from the scene where the duo is doing an autopsy on a dead infant in an impossibly tiny bathroom (the "dead infant" part probably explains why the exchange was cut), Scully stops suddenly and looks at Mulder incredulously, who is behind her.
--->'''Mulder:''' That's my penlight.\\
'''Scully:''' Really? I thought a longstanding curiosity had just been satisfied.
** In the Season 8 episode "Roadrunners", Agent Doggett phones in a lead on the local cult that kidnapped Scully, explaining "I just talked to a guy with a gun in his pocket--and I don't mean he was happy to see me!"
* ''Series/PeeWeesPlayhouse'' had a GettingCrapPastTheRadar moment: It substituted "wrench", and had Miss Yvonne say it to Carlos. He had a wrench, obviously; The Radar isn't blind.
* Lord Flasheart does this to himself in series two of ''Series/{{Blackadder}}''. "Nursie! I like it firm and fruity. Am I pleased to see you, or did I just put a CANOE in my pocket?!".
* Used in ''Series/PushingDaisies'', though without the exact line. After [[spoiler: Olive kissed Ned]] in a previous episode, Olive tries to make light of the awkwardness between them. When they bump against each other, she says "This is… what it is, isn't it? Unless that's not a rolling pin under your apron." Ned, of course, reaches under his apron and produces a rolling pin. Olive is ''quite'' the optimist, it seems.
* There is an episode of ''Series/StargateSG1'' where Carter and O'Neill are laying together for warmth. It's purely a joke on O'Neill's part, since he's half-dead at this point and Carter wasn't feeling anything but drawing his attention to something else she'd noticed.
-->'''Carter:''' Uh, sir?\\
'''O'Neill:''' It's my sidearm, I swear.
* ''Series/SpinCity'':
-->'''Caitlin:''' You're enjoying this, aren't you?\\
'''Mike:''' What? No.\\
'''Caitlin:''' Then what's that pressing against me?\\
'''Mike:''' It's a cross wrench.\\
'''Caitlin:''' I don't care what you call it, just pull it back.\\
'''Mike:''' ''(produces cross wrench)'' It's a cross wrench.\\
'''Caitlin:''' Well, what's that?\\
'''Mike:''' OK, maybe I'm enjoying this a little.
* Happens beautifully in the ''Series/TheOfficeUS'', when Pam hugs Michael after he stands up for her.
-->'''Pam:'''' Do you have something in your pocket?\\
''(long, awkward pause)''\\
'''Michael:''' A Chunky. ''(takes Chunky candy bar out of his pocket)''
* ''Series/TheThinBlueLine'': PC Maggie Habib is getting into character for an entrapment operation, and uses the line on PC Kevin Goody--a naive manchild type character with a crush on her. After collapsing in embarrassment, he replies that "Actually, it's a Curly-Wurly" (chocolate bar)
* In the ''Series/ThirdRockFromTheSun'' episode "Why Dickie Can't Teach", Harry enters an executive meeting with a salami in one of his pockets (long story) and someone asks him if that's a salami in his pocket. He, of course, replies, "Nah, I'm just happy to see ya."
* In ''Series/RobinHood'' TV series:
-->'''Marion:''' Why Robin, is that Sir Guy's sword in your scabbard?\\
'''Robin:''' No, I'm just happy to see you!
* Referenced in the finale of ''The Detectives:''
-->"Um, no, actually, it's my inhaler."
* ''Series/{{NCIS}}''. Ziva accidentally falls on top of [=McGee=] while inspecting a robot car.
-->'''Ziva:''' That had better be your handcuffs.
** Abby enthusiastically hugs Gibbs after a long absence, then asks if that's his badge she's feeling. Gibbs naturally produces his badge.
** Tony also preemptively denied it whilst [[NotWhatItLooksLike rolling naked in a bed with Ziva]]. "For your information, that's my knee!"
** And then again with Tony and Ziva, when she jumps on top of him to protect him from an explosion, and knocks him to the ground, staying on top of him.
-->'''Tony:''' This is nice. I miss the old Ziva.\\
'''Ziva:''' I can tell.\\
'''Tony:''' Don't flatter yourself. That's just my knee. (both smile at each other.)
* ''Series/WhiteCollar'', after a female suspect searches Neal very ''thoroughly'' for bugs:
-->'''Agent Lauren Cruz:''' What is that? She making sure that's not a gun in his pocket?
* Subversion in ''Series/ComedyInc''.
-->'''Woman''': Is that a gun in your pocket or are you happy to see me?\\
'''Man''': Both. *Shoots her*
* Lampshaded slightly in the series ''Series/AlienNation''; a neighbor of Detective Matt Sikes gives him a plate of poached trout for dinner, in gratitude for an act of kindness that Matt didn't remember performing. He then visits Newcomer neighbor (and inevitable romantic interest) Cathy, who greets him teasingly at the door; "Well, Matt, is that a fish in your hand or am I happy to see you… no, that didn't come out right."
* Subverted in an episode of the short-lived series ''Series/TheCommish''. In a [[NoirEpisode dream episode set in an old crime-noir setting]], the main character pulls a gun out of his pocket to which, the FemmeFatale responds, "That was a gun? I thought you were just happy to see me!".
* Happens in ''Series/{{Bones}}'' when Booth and the title character go to a strip club, and the woman that they're questioning gives Booth a lap dance. He insists, "That's my gun." He does, however, send Bones away at the end of the scene.
* Played with in ''Series/{{Supernatural}}''.
-->'''Dean:''' Oh God, please let that be a rifle.\\
'''Jo:''' (holding a gun to his back) No, I'm just really happy to see you.
* In the climactic scene of the third episode of ''Series/{{Sherlock}}'' :
-->'''Moriarty:''' Is that a British Army Browning [=L9A1=] in your pocket, or are you just pleased to see me?\\
'''Sherlock:''' ''[Aims the gun at him]'' Both.
** In the series three finale, Charles Magnussen's men frisk both Sherlock and John before their first meeting. Sherlock assumes they needn't bother with John, only to see he's carrying both a switchblade and a tire iron (having visited a drug den on a case earlier--he took the knife off someone who threated him).
-->'''John:''' (to the guard) Doesn't mean I'm ''not'' pleased to see you.
** Used once again in the 2015/2016 New Year's Special, with two different euphemisms.
-->'''Moriarty:''' [[ADateWithRosiePalms It's a dangerous habit, to finger a loaded firearm in the pocket of one's dressing gown.]] Or are you just pleased to see me?
-->'''Sherlock:''' You'll forgive me for taking precautions.
* On one episode of the mock talk show ''Series/NightStandWithDickDietrich,'' two guests were competing for a free plastic surgery; a woman with a huge nose and a man with a tiny penis. Over the course of the show they fell in love and decided they didn't need the surgery. As they embraced for the first time…
-->'''Woman:''' Hey, is that a roll of pennies in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?\\
'''Man:''' Well, I am happy to see you, but… (takes coins out of his pocket) yeah, it's just a roll of pennies.
* ''Series/MarriedWithChildren'' played with this trope at least twice.
** Peg once asked Al if that was money in your pocket or if he was happy to see her. She then realized it had to be money.
** Kelly once had to play the role of MadameCurie and assumed she was some hooker but Bud quickly explained who Madame Curie was. The mistake wasn't mentioned during the rest of the episode but [[BrickJoke was referenced to]] when Kelly's version of Madame Curie asked somebody if that was radium in his pocket of if he was happy to see her.
* ''Series/LoisAndClark'': At the two-part finale of Season 1, ComicBook/LexLuthor bought Kryptonite from a dealer who tried to kill him to get the money and keep the Kryptonite. After the dealer and Lex's hired double killed each other, Luthor reclaimed the Kryptonite and searched the dealer's pockets for the Kryptonite, asking if there was Kryptonite inside them or if he was happy to see Luthor.
* Subverted in ''Series/TheGoldenGirls'': [[LovableSexManiac Blanche Devereaux]] asks one of the men at the local bar this. Turns out he really ''is'' carrying a gun in his pocket.
* Parodied in ''Series/TimeGentlemenPlease'':
-->'''Janet:''' Is that a spanner in your pocket, or do you just have a six-inch metallic penis?
* On ''Series/GameOfThrones'', Jon and Ygritte have to snuggle for warmth when they sleep. The next morning they are both surprised by Jon's reaction.
-->'''Ygritte:''' Did you pull a knife on me during the night?
* On ''Series/{{Glee}}'' Sam and Blaine hug it out after Sam tells Blaine that he's fine with his crush on him. Then Sam asks if what he's feeling is a roll of breath mints in Blaine's pants. It was.
* On the British sketch show ''Al Murray's Multiple Personality Disorder'', there was a skit involving gay [[ThoseWackyNazis Nazi]] Ueberbombfuehrur Horst Schwul arresting an American soldier (played by John Barrowman) who had just parachuted into the German's [[DoubleEntendre camp]]. They quickly take a liking to each other, which leads to this exchange:
-->'''American Soldier:''' Is that a Luger in your pocket, or are you just pleased to see me?\\
'''Horst Schwul:''' …both!
* Referenced on ''Series/{{Arrow}}'', when Roy's stolen police radio starts squawking in the middle of a date with Thea.
-->'''Thea''': Do you have a police radio in your pocket?\\
'''Roy''': No, I'm just happy to see you.
* In ''Series/TheNewStatesman'' Alan poses as a terrorist hijacking a plane after one of his schemes backfires, and takes the SexyStewardess hostage. As he gives orders she says "do what he says, he's got a gun pressing into my back!" One of his hands is around her neck, the other is holding a grenade.
* In ''Series/CrazyExGirlfriend'', Rebecca tries to have a one-night stand and sings [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8a4vtGanrFA "Sex with a Stranger,"]] which includes the line, "Is that a gun?! Oh thank God, it’s just your penis."

* In a ''Game Informer'' review of the UsefulNotes/PlayStationPortable version of ''VideoGame/MaddenNFL 06'' (November 2005, Issue #151), the subtitle under the review header says, "Is that a football in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"
* ''[=GamePro=]''[='=]s [[https://web.archive.org/web/20050204221133/http://gamepro.com:80/sega/dreamcast/games/reviews/5721.shtml review]] of the UsefulNotes/SegaDreamcast version of ''[[VideoGame/NightmareCreatures Nightmare Creatures II]]'' says, "Is that a bloody axe in your hand or are you just happy to see me?"

* Music/PetShopBoys use a variant of this in "Pandemonium" to imply the subject… err… likes wild parties:
-->Is this a riot, or are you just pleased to see me?\\
Why aren't we holding hands and talking sweet?
* This line appears in a Music/BritneySpears song called "Kill The Lights": "Is that money in your pocket or are you happy to see me?"
* "Bullet" by Music/JessieJames.
-->Be careful what you wish for, you get what you see\\
Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
* A well-loved 1970s Swedish revue number, "Vad har du i fickan, Jan?"[[note]]What's that in your pocket, Jan [male name in Swedish]?[[/note]] has the performers dancing the tango. The male sings the verses about how he loves to dance close embrace style tango, but always gets this strange question--then the female takes over the refrain, which is her speculating about what he might have in his pocket, namely a giant banana, a rolled-up poster, a baguette, one of Tarzan's liana vines, a hefty tulip, or maybe a live swan?

* The stage play ''Theatre/LostInYonkers'' reveals that Uncle Louie does keep a gun in his pocket. He says that the ladies think it's something else when they dance real close.
* From the second ''[[Series/{{Bottom}} Bottom Live]]'' stage show, as Richie and Eddie, in prison, rehearse for Richie's forthcoming encounter with the jail's Mister Big:
-->'''Richie''': Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you pleased to see me?\\
'''Eddie''': Why, it's... [pulls out gun] A gun!\\
'''Richie''': My, it is a whopper, isn't i--''FUCKING HELL EDDDIE THAT'S A GUN!''
* ''Theatre/ThePeeWeeHermanShowOnBroadway'': When all the lights go out, Pee-Wee begins searching for his flashlight with his friends, and we can only the characters ByTheLightsOfTheirEyes. The flashlight in question is unquestionably Conkey's... thing.
-->'''Pee-Wee:''' Oh, here's my flashlight! Ha-ha! Hm, I can't find the button.\\
'''Conkey:''' That's not a fl-fl-fl-fl-flashlight, Pee-Wee!\\
'''Pee-Wee:''' Oh! Sorry, Conkey.

-->'''Magic Screen:''' ''Ooh''… wow… here's the flashlight.\\
'''Conkey:''' M-m-magic Screen, th-thats not the flashlight! Th-th-that's ''not'' the flashlight!\\
''Magic Screen:''' [[CrossesTheLineTwice Well, that's not my belly button either.]]

[[folder:Video Games]]
* Used in ''Videogame/MonkeyIsland'': "Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just happy to see us?" The hero had just stolen a banana from these guys. They weren't pleased.
** Also in the [=PS3=] version of ''VideoGame/TalesOfMonkeyIsland'', one of the bronze trophies obtained in Chapter 1 (when Guybrush sees the effects of the Pox of [=LeChuck=] on the inhabitants) is labeled, "Is That a Pox on Your Face, or Are You Just Angry to See Me?"
* In ''Videogame/IndianaJonesAndTheFateOfAtlantis'' when completely dark room is entered, the "Look" command is replaced with "Touch". Indy can "touch" Sophia to which she'll respond with "Is that a ship rib in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?". (Indiana does have a ship rib in his inventory)
* Both ''VideoGame/{{Civilization}} 3'' and ''4'' give us this line from Catherine the Great, parodying the usual depictions of her as a sex-hungry slut:
-->"Is that a treaty in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"
* Walking up to female villagers you saved in ''VideoGame/{{Overlord}}'' may cause them to say: "Is that a pumpkin in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"
* Used in one of the ''VideoGame/{{Gex}}'' games: "Is that a lightsaber, or are you just happy to see me?"
* ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyXII'' has a sidequest NPC use this line:
-->"Pardon me, Bhadra. Is that a bottle of Bhujerban Madhu in your pocket, or are you… it is?"
* Played with in ''VideoGame/Uncharted2AmongThieves'' with the following exchange, said while he's carrying her with her legs wrapped around him:
-->'''Chloe:''' Is that an ancient Tibetan ritual dagger in your pocket?\\
'''Drake:''' Maybe I'm just happy to see you.
* In the ''VideoGame/UltimateSpiderMan'' video game, upon seeing R.H.I.N.O., Spidey will ''attempt'' this.
-->'''Spider-Man:''' Hey, is that a horn on your head or are you just… happy… to see… I'm so scared I can't even finish my lame joke.
* Used in the 2009 game ''VideoGame/BionicCommando'' along with [[BreakingTheFourthWall another trope]] at the beginning of a boss fight.
-->'''Spencer:''' Whoa, is that a long health bar, or are you just happy to see me?
* Reading a shirt in ''VideoGame/NetHack'' may yield the following message:
-->"Is that Mjollnir in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"
* One of the female Blood Elf /flirt emotes from ''VideoGame/WorldofWarcraft''
-->"Is that a mana wyrm in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"
* Used in ''VideoGame/TeamFortress2'', in the description for the "Itsy Bitsy Spyer".
-->"Is that a miniature Spy in your pocket, or are you just happy to OH GOD STOP HITTING ME!"
* A variant of this appears in ''VideoGame/BladeRunner'', courtesy of Bullet Bob:
-->'''Bullet Bob:''' Is that a .45 blaster under your coat, or are you just happy to be here?
* In ''VideoGame/TrueCrimeStreetsOfLA'' during a scene at a strip club:
-->'''Stripper: Is that a gun in your pants?'''\\
'''Nick: No, I'm just happy to see you!"
* In ''Videogame/BaldursGate'', one of the lines that can come up when speaking with a courtesan:
-->'''Courtesan:''' I don't much care if you're happy to see me, as long as that's a pouch of coins.
* When talking to Willy in the streets of ''Videogame/ThimbleweedPark'', either of the FBI agents will ask him what that thing is in his pocket (wallet) upon which Willy replies that he may just be happy to see them.
* In the manual for ''Videogame/{{Whacked}}'', MsFanservice Lucy is introduced with "Is that a controller in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"

* [[http://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php?date=20051026 Referenced]] in ''Webcomic/GirlGenius'', when a still-rather-innocent Agatha portrays a [[FemmeFatale her mother]] in a play, having practiced her lines out of context: "--and when I asked him if that was a ''wrench'' in his pocket--"
** The play in question being "''[[http://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php?date=20051017 The Socket Wench of Prague]]''" and is [[TakeOurWordForIt well-known for being risqué]]--the circus wanted to leave town quickly, and suggested using it to get thrown out, until they found that the prince wanted to see that specific play. [[HotterAndSexier "PS: Tart it up."]]
* Art and Kat are trapped in a closet in ''Webcomic/SequentialArt''; Kat is about to say this line when Art yells "Broom Handle!" Later, Kat checks the grill in the door to see if anyone is outside, which puts her rear in proximity to his groin. She shoots him a dirty look and he defends ''"Well: stop rubbing your arse against me!!"''
* The ''Webcomic/ExterminatusNow'' strip [[http://exterminatusnow.comicgenesis.com/d/20070127.html where Jamilla kisses Eastwood]] features something similar:
-->'''Jamilla:''' What's that poking my in the thigh under you coat?\\
'''Eastwood:''' Uhm... it's... a... '''PACKET OF MINTS'''!\\
'''Jamilla:''' Well, you must like em, feels like it's half empty.
** Behind them, his... [[WithFriendsLikeThese "friends"]] are covering their mouths to barely stop them from being in throes of laughter.
* In ''Webcomic/QuestionableContent'', during the early days of WillTheyOrWontThey between Marten and Faye, she gives him a [[JustFriends purely platonic]] hug, and then comments "I'm just going to pretend that a roll of quarters in your pocket is what I feel poking into my hip."
* In [[http://eecomics.net/EEArchives/?strip_id=259 this strip]] of ''Webcomic/EmergencyExit'', Saya asks [[ChasteHero Eddie]] while drunk, "Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?" Eddie then pulls out a banana.
** [[http://eecomics.net/EEArchives/?strip_id=305 So Saya… you ate Eddie's banana?]]
* ''Webcomic/AndShineHeavenNow'' has the Spirit of the Scarlet [[http://hellsing.comicgenesis.com/d/20090902.html asking Pip]] if that's a gun in his pocket or if he's happy to see her. After producing the gun in question Scarlet then has to ask if he has ''two'' in there.
* Played with in [[http://www.explosm.net/comics/1911/ this]] ''Webcomic/CyanideAndHappiness'' comic.
** Another has "It's a gun. And I hate seeing you." Followed by the man making a thrusting motion, and the gun shooting the questioner.
* ''Webcomic/{{Sinfest}}'' did it with [[http://www.sinfest.net/archive_page.php?comicID=3204 Blue vs. Criminy]] (it obviously ''is'' a telescope and the line [[LiteralMinded backfired]]) and [[http://www.sinfest.net/archive_page.php?comicID=1132 Monique vs. Slick]].
* ''Webcomic/LukeSurl'' had a [[http://www.lukesurl.com/archives/3266 WACOM stylus]] in the pocket. Or not.
* ''ComicStrip/WhatsNewWithPhilAndDixie'', when they finally got their [[RunningGag "Sex and D&D" themed issue]]. This specific gag was [[http://www.airshipentertainment.com/growfcomic.php?date=20080601 about orcs…]]
* ''Webcomic/ComicWho'' does this with Jack and the Doctor. They hug, and Jack asks if the Doctor had a banana in his pocket, or was just happy to see him. [[http://comic-who.blogspot.com/2012/01/banana-in-pocket.html Jack's disappointed.]]
* Butch of ''Webcomic/ChoppingBlock'' [[http://choppingblock.keenspot.com/d/20010917.html has declared it to be both.]]

[[folder: Web Original]]
* In the third episode of ''Podcast/TheBrianAndJillShow'', Brian uses the trope word-for-word in a game of "No Apparent Reason" as a clue to try and get the players to guess 'Banana.' Answers given included [[ItMakesSenseInContext "whale sperm"]], "a pickle", "a roll of quarters", and "gum" before someone finally guessed it.
* In an IGN [[http://www.ign.com/articles/2009/10/20/wwe-smackdown-vs-raw-2010-psp-review review]] of [[VideoGame/WWEVideoGames WWE SmackDown vs. Raw 2010]] for UsefulNotes/PlayStationPortable, the subtitle under the review header says, "Is that John Cena in your pocket or are you just happy to see us?"
* One of WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic's "[[https://youtu.be/3ypgzzDvZS4?t=8m39s Top 15 David Bowie Dick Jokes]]" in his [[Recap/TheNostalgiaCriticS9E3 review]] of ''Film/{{Labyrinth}}'':
-->''Is that [[Franchise/TheMuppets Gonzo's nose]] in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?''

[[folder:Western Animation]]
* ''WesternAnimation/{{Futurama}}'': Amy to Kif: "Is that your camouflage reflex or are you just happy to see me?"
* Played with (and then immediately lampshaded) in ''WesternAnimation/LucyTheDaughterOfTheDevil'' (while Lucy is stealing supplies from a dildo factory).
-->'''Security Guard:''' Is that a dildo in your pocket?\\
'''Lucy:''' No! I'm just happy to see you!\\
'''Security Guard:''' [[NeverHeardThatOneBefore I've heard that one. Every shoplifter uses that joke.]]
* Played with once in ''WesternAnimation/FamilyGuy'': Cleveland once begins with "Is that a banana in your pocket," but ends it with "or an erection in your pocket?", essentially [[DontExplainTheJoke explaining the joke]] before it's finished.
* In ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'', Lovejoy's wife hugs her husband and asks "Is that a train in your pocket or are you happy to see me?" He replies, "Both".
* [[JustForPun Comes up]] occasionally in WesternAnimation/{{Archer}}.
* From ''WesternAnimation/TheVentureBrothers'':
-->'''Shore Leave''': This isn't my gun; it's an indication of how excited I am to be doing this. ''[[DramaticGunCock This]]'' is my gun.

[[folder:Real Life]]
* Though it was re-used later in ''SheDoneHimWrong'' and later still in ''Sextette'' Creator/MaeWest originally used this line in a LA train station upon her return from Chicago, to a police officer assigned to escort her home.
* [[http://www.komonews.com/news/45715787.html This Clerk]] uses the line on an armed robber (who DID have a pistol in his pocket), before calling him a dumbass!
* [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CAepItFDXc4 That's my penis]].
* {{Invoked}} a [[http://notalwaysright.com/moms-gotta-love-em/1300 couple]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/is-that-a-pinot-noir-in-your-pocket/1605 times]] on Website/NotAlwaysRight.
* [[http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/07/16/jonah-falcon-largest-penis-frisked-by-tsa_n_1675767.html Someone's actual penis got him in trouble with the TSA.]]