-->''I think it's time [[TheMafiya Mr Vassikin]] was introduced to my friend: Mr Fist.''
--->--'''[[BattleButler But]][[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin ler]]''', ''ArtemisFowl: The Arctic Incident''

ICallItVera is when people name their guns. (Or swords, or other conventional weapons.) This trope is when people name their "guns." Or in plain English, their arms. This also sometimes happens with fists or any other body part that can be used in a fight. Usually occurs in the context of a threat, an actual fight, or just standing in front of a mirror admiring their physique (kissing optional).

Frequently TruthInTelevision. Has '''absolutely nothing to do with''' ADateWithRosiePalms. See ICallHimMrHappy for when people choose to name their more...intimate body parts.
----
!!!Examples

[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder:Film]]
* In ''WesternAnimation/ShrekTheThird'', Shrek jokes that if Arty doesn't agree to become king, he'll introduce him to his good friends, Persuasion and Reason. He holds up one fist at a time - "Here's Persuasion, and here's Reason".
* In ''Film/TheRundown'', Travis has named his left and right legs "Thunder and Lightning". Unfortunately, he's more good at getting his ass kicked than kicking ass.
* ''Film/AnchormanTheLegendOfRonBurgundy'' has Ron Burgundy threaten a cameo-appearance Jack Black to fisticuffs featuring lefty and righty, or "Jack Johnson and Tom O'Leary."
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Jokes]]
* One [[Website/ChuckNorrisFacts Chuck Norris Fact]] claims that Chuck is planning to sue {{NBC}} because Franchise/LawAndOrder are the trademarked names of his left and right legs.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:LiveActionTV]]
* ''Series/ThirtyRock'', Jack's big Boston Irish family has a brawl:
-->'''Jack Donaghy:''' ''[takes off jacket]'' [[CallingTheOldManOut I think of all the things that I've been holding inside me that I've wanted to say to you]], but ''[puts up fists]'' I'm gonna let St. Patrick and St. Michael do my talking for me!\\
'''Jimmy Donaghy:''' ''[puts up fists]'' You'll have to get through Tip O'Neill and Bobby Sands first!\\
'''Eddie Donaghy:''' You call those fist names? ''[puts up fists]'' Say hello to Bono and Sandra Day O'Connor!\\
'''Jack Donaghy:''' Those are the stupidest fist names I've ever heard.
* In one episode of ''Series/TheATeam'', Murdock annoys B.A. by introducing himself as Dr. Vern, and his assistent [[HandPuppet Socky]]. B.A. says "This is my talking fist. His name is Knock-Out. Would you like to hear Knock-Out speak?"
* Used hilariously during the Comedy Central Roast of Pamela Anderson. After it's all over, she steps on stage to thank the people for coming, then very bluntly draws attention to her kinda see-through shirt. After apologizing, she then states that she couldn't have been there without her two best friends, [[GagBoobs "Poncho and Lefty," points at her breasts,]] [[{{Gainaxing}} then enthusiastically bounced them around.]]
[[/folder]]

[[folder:NewspaperComics]]
* ''ComicStrip/MotherGooseAndGrimm'' for [[http://www.grimmy.com/images/MGG_Archive/MGG_2012/MGG-2012-05-19.gif May 19th, 2012]]. Literature/TheCatInTheHat and TheGrinch are in a bar. Literature/TheCatInTheHat holds up his fists in a threatening manner and says "Oh yeah? You want to meet Thing 1 and Thing 2?"
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[[folder:Pinball]]
* Inverted in the ''Pinball/{{Rocky}}'' pinball machine; it features two pairs of flippers, named "Left Jab", "Right Hook", "Left Hook", and "Right Jab".
[[/folder]]

[[folder:ProfessionalWrestling]]
* Santino Marella calls his biceps "Pasquale and Francesco".
* CMPunk once called his fists "Regular and Unleaded."
* HulkHogan calling his arms "24-inch pythons" may count.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:VideoGames]]
* In ''VideoGame/SuperPaperMario'', when Mr. L mocks Count Bleck's other flunkies in a cutscene, an angry O'Chunks offers to introduce him to "Fist Jr. an' his wee pal, Slappie!"
* In VideoGame/TeamFortress2 the Heavy's fists are his default melee weapon and can be named like all other weapons allowing this trope to be invoked by the players.
* In ''VideoGame/BrutalLegend'', a [[GiantHandsOfDoom Bouncer]] nicknamed 'Mittens' threatens to use the only two mooks he knows can get the job done: Fear (left fist) and Pain (Right fist).
[[/folder]]

[[folder:WebAnimation]]
* In an EasterEgg in the [[WebAnimation/HomestarRunner Strong Bad Email]] "road trip", Bubs combines this with a reference to a famous Los Angeles law firm:
-->'''Coach Z:''' Whaddya mean, I'm the green Bubs? If anything, you're the orange Coach Z!
-->'''Bubs:''' The first person to call me "the orange Coach Z" is gonna get a free consultation with my friends Jacoby ''(balls up his left fist)'' and Meyers! ''(balls up his right fist)''
[[/folder]]

[[folder:WebComics]]
* Goro, a muscular surgeon in ''Webcomic/TheDragonDoctors'', was de-strengthed for a while and quite delighted to get her big arms back. After cracking a bug-man's back plates into alignment again, she thanks her "lovely assistants!"
* In ''SkinHorse'', Konstantine declares [[http://skin-horse.com/2010/todays-comic-185/ his biceps have clever names]]. It later transpires this applies to [[http://skin-horse.com/2010/todays-comic-357/ all his muscles]].
[[/folder]]

[[folder:WebOriginal]]
* In the "Nicktoons" ''[[WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic Nostalgia Critic]]'' review, while reviewing ''WesternAnimation/HeyArnold'', Critic shows the example from that show (see Western Animation below) and says he has named his fists "Betsy" and "Pancake".
* {{Invoked|Trope}} in Episode 39 of [[Machinima/YogscastMinecraftSeries the Yogscast's Jaffa Factory series]]. LetsPlay/{{Sips}} mentions that he never carries any weapons ([[BadBoss presumably because a big-shot CEO would rely exclusively on others for protection]]). Simon Lane jokingly suggests that he actually has the two lethal weapons of Lefty and Righty on him at all times. Sips says that's true, but corrects him on the names: Fuckin' A and Fuckin' B.
** Fuckin' A and Fuckin' B carried on to ''VideoGame/TheElderScrollsVSkyrim'', where Sips's character, Princess Leia the lizard/wizard/fabulous prositute, has upgraded them to throw firebolts.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:WesternAnimation]]
* In ''WesternAnimation/{{Recess}}'', Spinelli threatens a couple times to introduce students to her good friend, "Madam Fist." In TheMovie, ''WesternAnimation/RecessSchoolsOut'', the other kids remark that it seems to be [[YourAnswerToEverything her answer to everything]].
* Helga from ''WesternAnimation/HeyArnold'', meanwhile, has "Old Betsy and the Five Avengers."
-->'''Harold:''' Old who, and a the five what?
-->'''Helga:''' My fists, stupid!
-->'''Harold:''' Wait, your fists have names? You're confusing me!
* In the ''WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic'' episode "The Mysterious Mare-Do-Well", Applejack calls her back legs "Bucky [=MacGillicuddy=] and Kicks [=McGee=]".
* Bender in the initial finale of {{WesternAnimation/Futurama}} affectionately names his hands Grabby and Squeezey.
** In a later episode, "Assie Come Home", they're instead named Gropey and Cheaty.
* ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'':
** Groundskeeper Willie refers to his fists as "The Lads".
** In "I, D'oh-bot":
-->'''Pimple Faced Kid:''' Are you here with your children, sir?
-->'''Moe:''' Uh, yeah, my two kids. ''(holds up fists)'' "Screw", and "You".
** In "[[Recap/TheSimpsonsS23E7TheManInTheBlueFlannelPants The Man in the Blue Flannel Pants]]," Dolph says Bart will hear from ''his'' sisters and raises his fists.
-->'''Jimbo:''' Your fists are sisters?
-->'''Dolph:''' Yeah, "Poke-ahontas" and "Sock-a-jaw-ea".
-->'''Bart:''' Nice save.
* In the WesternAnimation/{{Chowder}} episode, "The Moldy Touch":
-->'''Mung:''' Funjl, if you don't release Chowder, I'll have to introduce you to my friends, ''(holds up fists)'' Mr. Fisty and his wife, Elaine.
* A variant appears in ''WesternAnimation/ACharlieBrownChristmas'', where Lucy says she has five good reasons for Linus to stop dragging his blanket around on stage during the Christmas pageant, and counts off her fingers as she curls them into a fist.
* In an episode of ''WesternAnimation/KungFuPandaLegendsOfAwesomeness'', Tigress makes a joke like this...and [[DontExplainTheJoke tries to explain the meaning of the joke]].
-->'''Tigress''': My friends are the twins...Discipline..and Sacrifice.
-->'''Po''': Heh..I don't think they'll like me.
-->'''Tigress''': *dryly* That's okay, you'll never meet them.
-->'''Po''': OH-HOH! You made a funny!
-->'''Tigress''': *proud* That was funny, wasn't it? It has meaning on two levels: You can't meet them because they're an abstract idea and you WON'T because you're laz-
-->'''Po''': *unamused* Yeah...okay, now you're just wrecking it.
[[/folder]]