[[quoteright:350:[[Series/TheXFiles http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/Mulder_Scully_TheXFiles_BadBlood_LikeAnOldMarriedCouple2_9803.png]]]]
[[caption-width-right:350:[[Recap/TheXFilesS05E12BadBlood These two FBI agents are really comfortable with each other.]]]]

->'''Penny:''' It's kind of nice. Look at us, I'm reading, you're reading. We're like an old married couple.\\
'''Sheldon:''' If we were an old married couple, the wife would serve iced tea and snickerdoodles.\\
'''Penny:''' I don't have iced tea and snickerdoodles.\\
'''Sheldon:''' A good wife would go to the store.\\
'''Penny:''' I want a divorce...\\
'''Sheldon:''' Good, on the way to the lawyers pick up some tea and cookies.
-->-- ''Series/TheBigBangTheory''

Two characters who seem very comfortable with each other to the point that it seems like they have been married for a long time, though obviously it doesn't apply to couples who actually ''have'' been together for a long time. Usually it is done through constant arguments with each other, as only people who are so closely bonded can have such open communication between them ([[VitriolicBestBuds whether they will admit it or not]]). Someone is apt to comment that they behave just like a married couple.

Typically the argument will be a back and forth of opinions, such as a CavemenVsAstronautsDebate. It is likely to get heated but neither of them are willing to just leave. In extreme cases it might start getting ugly with insults about personal issues being flung about. If not an argument based, it is often tied with HeterosexualLifePartners where domestic issues are a common topic.

Often applied to those with BelligerentSexualTension and {{UST}}. Compare SlapSlapKiss. See also SheIsNotMyGirlfriend. For the JustFriends version, see VitriolicBestBuds. Can be a staple of having characters be MistakenForGay by way of adding to the HoYay-derived [[QueerPeopleAreFunny humor]].

----
!!Examples

[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder:Anime & Manga]]
* Mentioned HoYay in ''Manga/GetBackers'' by Ban Mido, talking about Kazuki and Juubei.
* ''Anime/MazingerZ'': Kouji and Sayaka were like this. Once while they are arguing -and fighting- in the background, Shiro is fortune-telling. He notes the cards tell his brother and Sayaka are destined to be together forever.
* The common observation of Nadia and Jean done by Marie turned into a running gag in ''Anime/NadiaTheSecretOfBlueWater''.
* Shinji and Asuka in ''Anime/NeonGenesisEvangelion''. The above running gag about Nadia and Jean was [[ShoutOut parodied]] by Toji about them.
** Shinji and Asuka ''double'' on this score in the LighterAndSofter manga spinoffs. There, Asuka's rage level and Shinji's ExtremeDoormat level are both turned down, so there's [[VitriolicBestBuds more arguing and more friendship]] at the same time. They're always together, care for each other deeply, and... never stop griping at each other. (Add to that Asuka crushing on Shinji, Shinji not noticing, and that being the cause of Asuka's more canon-Asuka-ish moments.) It's still Toji who jokes about it; he refers to them as "the newlyweds" more often than he actually uses their names.
** Ritsuko once said that Misato and Kaji act like a married couple
* ''Manga/RanmaOneHalf'': This observation is what gets Ranma and Akane engaged.
** Even their classmates notice.
--->"Ooo! A lovers' quarrel!"\\
"Practically married already."
** [[spoiler: After the end of the manga, they ''almost'' are, if not for the wedding being interrupted.]]
* Bulma and Vegeta in ''Manga/DragonBall'' do this infrequently in some episodes and the movies too. It's pretty funny watching them snip at each other.
** Goku and Vegeta also get a good share of bickering in, mostly while exploring Buu's body in Z and during the battle against Omega Shenron in GT.
* In episode 2 of ''Anime/DigimonSavers'', Marcus is trying to tell Yoshi to leave, but she refuses, so they get into an argument. Then Kristy walks past:
-->'''Kristy:''' ''(to Marcus and Yoshi)'' Stop arguing like an old married couple.\\
'''Marcus and Yoshi:''' [[SheIsNotMyGirlfriend We're not a couple]]!
* Mentioned about Yusuke and Kuwabara in ''Manga/YuYuHakusho''. Botan even has an ImagineSpot dedicated to it.
* Another HoYay example has Doumeki and Watanuki of ''Manga/XxxHOLiC'' behave like this around each other, much to the amusement of Yuuko (and [[YaoiFangirl the readers]]).
* [[JerkWithAHeartOfGold Konata]] and [[{{Tsundere}} Kagami]] from ''Manga/LuckyStar'' are pretty good examples of this. Much of their dialogue consists of verbal jousting, and the barbs get quite vicious on occasion. You just ''know'' that both would happily give every organ in their body to the other if they had to.
* Negi and Asuna of ''Manga/MahouSenseiNegima'' have gotten this at least once.
** Kotaro and Natsumi sometimes act similarly too. [[spoiler:They eventually ''do'' get married.]]
** Chisame sometimes acts this way towards Negi as well, possibly lampshading it during the Magic World arc when she appoints herself Asuna's proxy.
* Gilbert and Alice of ''Manga/PandoraHearts'' have the tendency to act like this. All the time. they can hardly have a serious conversation without making some sarcastic retort to the other. [[BigBrotherMentor Oscar]] even made the comment that "They get along well enough to bicker".
** Elliot and Leo also have the tendency to bicker over various things, and some of these bickerings may escalate to an outright fight with a lot of fighting and throwing of various nearby objects. Despite this (more like [[OppositesAttract because of]]), they're still best friends.
* Heiji and Kazuha from ''Manga/DetectiveConan'', they are ChildhoodFriends who bicker with each other, but do love each other, even if they have a very hard time confessing to each other.
** The same goes to Shinichi in Ran; when [[spoiler:Conan was reverted to Shinichi for a day in ''Desperate Revival'',]] their classmates just referred to them as married.
* In the ''Manga/LoveHina'' manga, when Keitaro decides to get a job, he suits up and all the girls laugh at him. Naru however, does up his tie, leading Kitsune to make this exact comment about them. [[HeIsNotMyBoyFriend Denials follow.]]
* Not [[LampshadeHanging lampshaded]] in the animanga itself, but Yamamoto and Gokudera from ''Manga/KatekyoHitmanReborn'' do act like this
* ''Manga/LovelyComplex'': Koizumi and Otani are accused of acting like this - after they're already together, surprisingly, but they still both get embarrassed.
* In one of the better moments from the ''Anime/{{Beyblade}}'' dub, Max and Rey referred to Tyson and Kai this way. The sheer amount of SlashFic those two inspired back in the day makes this about ten times funnier.
* Kyo and Yuki are called out on this (word for word) by Shigure in ''Manga/FruitsBasket''. They're both displeased with the comment.
* Oh my god ''England and America'' from ''Manga/AxisPowersHetalia'', whose arguments have warranted a comment from [[DepravedBisexual France]] about their {{UST}}... and their {{UST}}... and their {{UST}}.
** And with that, there's ''France and England'', who've known each other since the very beginning of time and probably have a thousand romance tropes under their belt.
* [[spoiler:After consummating their love for one another]] Guts and Casca from ''Manga/{{Berserk}}'' begin acting like this toward one another throughout the entire Griffith rescue operation, with them both getting miffed and jealous toward one another, but are clearly seen being very caring and sentimental toward each other (with some SlapSlapKiss action in-between, especially from [[{{Tsundere}} Casca]]). Judeau and Pippin take this as a good thing and play it for the laughs. Griffith, judging from they way he is [[KubrickStare staring at the couple from underneath his helmet]] and seeing that [[spoiler:he had been through the hideous ordeal of being tortured for a year only to come back to see a change in authority, power, and affection between Guts, Casca, and himself]] [[GreenEyedMonster doesn't seem very pleased with this]]...
* ''Manga/{{Naruto}}'' has one with the villains; both Deidara and Sasori and Kakuzu with Hidan bicker to one another like, as fans put, this trope. However, they take it in two different ways; Deidara and Sasori, being artists, bicker about their type of art (apparently often), even when the situation at hand has ''NOTHING'' to do with it. Kakuzu and Hidan, on the other hand, already hate each other, so all they need is one reason, and they're very likely to go off on one another and spend a pointless amount of time doing so.
* In ''Manga/LittleHouseWithAnOrangeRoof'', Rina and Youta's classmates specifically mention this trope in reference to their constant spats.
* Black☆Star and Tsubaki from ''Manga/SoulEater'' are all but HappilyMarried. [[spoiler:They are even raising a kid together!]]
** Maka and Soul too. They are very comfortable around each other (like the above two, they live together), have the occasional lover's spat and SnarkToSnarkCombat and can read each other well. Arachne even comments on of the fights they had as entertaining.
* ''Anime/{{Free}}'' has Haruka and Makoto. The latter is frequently seen taking care of Haru, saying exactly what he thinks and knowing just how to convince him of something. The occasional bickering, while quite mild, is also present. In recent episodes though their [[HeterosexualLifePartners relationship]] starts to show signs of slipping into [[HoYay other territories]].
* [[OneManArmy Levi]] and [[BrainyBrunette Hanji]] from ''Manga/AttackOnTitan'' seem to have this going on. They're implied to have known each other for quite some time and they're almost always teasing one another. (Something most people would get roundhouse kicked for if they tried that with Levi.)
* Sayaka and Kyouko, of ''PuellaMagiMadokaMagica,'' evolved from bitter rivals to this by the time of [[AllThereInTheManual the Drama CDs]] and TheMovie. They could be argued as VitriolicBestBuds, but that's certainly [[HoYay not how the fandom sees it.]]
* [[HoYay Hotsuma and Shusei]] of [[UragiriWaBokuNoNamaeWoShitteiru UraBoku]] are super harmonic and gentle with each other but they do bicker quite often and ''Luka'' (yes, that [[TheStoic Luka]]) calls them out on it at one point. [[BerserkButton They're not amused.]]
* ''Anime/{{Patlabor}}'': While the relationship between Captains Gotoh and Shinobu is [[StrictlyProfessionalRelationship strictly professional]], they fit the trope to a tee. Their bickering rarely goes beyond snarking, and they relate as if they've known each other their entire lives. This is best seen in ''"The [=SVU's=] Longest Day"'' in the OVA continuity, and the entirety of the ''[[Heartwarming/{{Patlabor}} "Two in Karuizawa"]]'' episode in ''The Mobile Police/New Files'' continuity.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Comic Books]]
* ComicBook/CaptainAmerica and ComicBook/IronMan, throughout almost all of their [[HeterosexualLifePartners friendship]].
** [[YoungAvengers Wiccan and Hulkling's]] relationship often smacks more than a little of this. Of course, [[OfficialCouple there is a reason for that...]]
* On a totally different note, LewisTrondheim's ''ComicBook/KaputAndZosky''.
* BoosterGold used the phrase (in #36 of his ongoing title) to describe his own relationship with BlueBeetle (Ted Kord), after Brainiac 2 assumed they were lovers. (This was rather a broad-minded assumption on Brainy's part, but only because [[spoiler:Ted had been transformed into a chipmunk at the time]]).
* {{Wolverine}} and [[Comicbook/{{X-Men}} Nightcrawler]] act as a married couple and parents, sometimes for Kitty and Piotr (with Dad!Wolverine being hard when Piotr hurts Kitty or 's wishing that his "daughter" remains on the team)
* ''ComicBook/{{Bone}}'' gives us the Two Stupid Rat Creatures. Pretty much every time they appear they spend most of their panel time bickering with each other like idiots. The fact that one of them is hopelessly determined to eat a quiche dosen't help.
-->'''Purple Rat:''' If we keep him for ourselves we can do whatever we want with him.\\
'''Brown Rat:''' Does that include baking him into a quiche?\\
'''Purple Rat:''' '''NO, IT DOES NOT INCLUDE THAT!'''
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Films - Animated]]
* Used in a deleted scene of ''Disney/ThePrincessAndTheFrog'', between [[AllWorkVsAllPlay Naveen and Tiana]].
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Films - Live Action]]
* In ''Film/HarryPotterAndThePrisonerOfAzkaban'' , Snape enters the Shrieking Shack and remarks to Sirius and Lupin, "Listen to you two, quarreling like an old married couple."
* This is how Creator/RobertDowneyJr described the relationship between his character and Watson in ''Film/SherlockHolmes''.
* ''Grapevine''. To Susan Crawford and Matt Brewer:
-->'''Thumper Klein:''' Why don't you two just get married right now? You already argue like an old married couple.
* Lampshaded by WordOfGod in his commentary of ''Film/RedEye'' when Lisa reminds Jackson of his promise that he would call off the gunman in front of her father's house:
-->'''Jackson:''' What?\\
'''Lisa:''' You know what. My dad. Make the call. Your part of the deal.\\
[Jackson takes the phone and puts it on the receiver]\\
'''Jackson:''' I still need you.\\
'''Lisa:''' You ''promised''.\\
'''Jackson:''' And I'll ''keep'' that promise...
* In ''[[Film/TheNakedGun The Naked Gun 33 1/3]]'', Frank Drebin is infiltrating a family gang hired to blow up the Academy Awards. Then his wife Jane shows up, thinking that he is cheating on her. Playing his role, he suggests they keep her as a hostage. Then they start arguing (even though they supposedly don't know each other), causing the head of the gang to get suspicious and claim that they sound like they're married.
* ''Film/HighAnxiety'' the Mel Brooks character and Arthur Brisbane's daughter use this to get through airport security undetected by being a loud old arguing married (Jewish) couple.
* [[WillSmith Detective Spooner]] and [[HotScientist Doctor Calvin]] in ''Film/IRobot''.
* Scientists Dr. Newton Geiszler and Dr. Hermann Gottlieb in ''Film/PacificRim'', which may be the most popular pairing in the fandom despite a couple of canonical pairings. Though they almost never stop fighting over their approaches to the kaiju, [[AwLookTheyReallyDoLoveEachOther they really do seem to care about each other]]:
** Hermann [[spoiler: panics when he finds Newt unconscious after having drifted with a kaiju]].
** Later, he offers [[spoiler: to share the neural load with Newt when he drifts with another kaiju. Newt's response? (not a direct quote, but close) "You'd do that for me? I-I mean, you'd do that ''with me''?" Hermann coyly responds that the world is hanging in the balance, so he doesn't have much choice.]]
** And finally, [[spoiler: at the end of the film, Hermann sidles close to Newt, who throws an enthusiastic arm over his shoulder in a hug.]]
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Literature]]
* Shasta and Aravis in ''[[Literature/TheChroniclesOfNarnia The Horse and His Boy]]''. They end up getting married [[CrowningMomentOfFunny "so as to do it more conveniently."]]
* Tonker and Lofty in ''Discworld/MonstrousRegiment''. Jackrum blurts out 'What are you, married?' at them in the middle of the book, though it's quite likely that he already knew they were an item.
* In ''Literature/{{Boundary}}'' the two linguists are described as this by several characters. They end up getting a RelationshipUpgrade at the end making then the [[BetaCouple Gamma Couple]]
* Monk and Ham in the ''Franchise/DocSavage'' novels.
* It's more subtle than usual, but in ''Literature/HarryPotterAndTheOrderOfThePhoenix'', Ron and Hermione's bickering strongly reminds Harry of Molly and Arthur Weasley's bickering at one point. Molly and Arthur ''are'' an old married couple. [[spoiler: Pretty damn cool method of foreshadowing.]]
* In one of the ''Literature/{{Bunnicula}}'' books, "Return to Howliday Inn", the ''ghost'' [[spoiler:(actually Hamlet the dog pulling some ventriloquism)]] comments that Harold and Chester argue like an old married couple.
* Toward the beginning of ''Literature/{{Redwall}}'', as Matthias and Cornflower take care of the Churchmouse twins, Colin Vole comments knowingly that they're like an old wedded couple. He's instantly told off, since Matthias is in line to become a brother in the Redwall order, [[spoiler:but sure enough, they're married by the end of the book]].
* [[TheStoic Asher]] and [[ManicPixieDreamGirl Eliza]] in ''Literature/SomeoneElsesWar''. Respectively sixteen and fourteen.
* The relationship of Christine Taylor and her brother Lee's high school friend Dayton Nickles when she comes back to the Indian reservation when she contracts a terminal illness in Michael Dorris' ''Literature/AYellowRaftInBlueWater''.
* British statesman Lord Chesterfield in ''Literature/LettersToHisSon'': "the Duke of Newcastle and [[WilliamPittTheElder Mr. Pitt]] jog on like man and wife; that is, seldom agreeing, often quarreling; but by mutual interest, upon the whole, not parting." (letter 221)
* The bickering between Literature/NeroWolfe and Archie Goodwin can take on this edge since their working relationship specifically revolves around the latter being hired to nag, provoke and irritate the former into working when he is determined not to.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Live-Action TV]]
* In ''Series/{{Smallville}}'', Lois and Clark are all over this for ''years'' before they actually even admit having feelings for one another.
* ''Series/BostonLegal'' has Denny Crane and Alan Shore, who make more jokes about their own HoYay than the rest of the cast put together. When Denny catches Alan doing their OnceAnEpisode balcony routine with another man, he reacts as though Alan were cheating on him. [[spoiler: In the finale, they actually do get married and literally become an old married couple, which is to say they are 'old' (Denny is 75) and married.]]
* ''Series/{{Cheers}}''. Three words: Sam and Diane.
--> '''Sam:''' You know--while we're talking about ''problems'', you wanna know what ''really'', REALLY bugs me about you?
--> '''Diane:''' Fine!
--> '''Sam:''' The way you eat ''pretzels''! ''({{Beat}})''
--> '''Diane:''' ''Pretzels''!
--> '''Sam:''' Yeah, that's right--''three'' bites! Not ''two'', not ''one'' like the rest of us--but THREE BITES!
--> '''Diane:''' Do you want to know ''what "bugs" me about YOU''?!
--> '''Sam:''' Oh, I'd love to. What?
--> '''Diane:''' THE COLOGNE YOU ALWAYS WEAR IS TOTALLY WITHOUT ''NUANCE''!!!
* ''Series/{{Frasier}}''.
** In the episode "Bla-Z-Boy", Frasier becomes upset that he's been living with his father for 8 years, and 26 if his childhood is included. Things come to a boil when Daphne mentions that the two could be considered common law spouses. After Frasier snarks at Martin an umpteenth time, Roz muses, "Just like an old married couple!", which makes Frasier absolutely ''fume''. This ends up causing a bit of friction over the episode, since Frasier isn't particularly thrilled with the implication that the most significant relationship he's ever had or is likely to have is with his father.
** Also, Martin and Daphne on a constant basis. While their relationship is strictly father-daughter/doctor-patient, whenever they argue they really do sound exactly like an old married couple. Beautifully played with in the episode "Three Valentines". When Daphne and Martin find themselves having dinner together on Valentines Day, Daphne starts talking about their relationship, and how she enjoys looking after him, and it's almost like Martin is her ... then breaks off. It eventually turns out that she was thinking "It's sort of like you're my pet". Cue them arguing ... like an old married couple.
** And Frasier and Niles, of course, do this constantly, what with the nitpicking, unwarranted commentary, and the barrage of swiftly and pitch-perfectly thrown insults so easy and practiced that it's almost a reflex. Whenever they don't sound like [[Franchise/HarryPotter Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger]], they sound like [[ILoveLucy Fred and Ethel Mertz,]] to the point of DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything.
* ''Series/TheAdventuresOfSinbad'' (1996). Sinbad and Maeve are arguing.
-->'''Caipra:''' Alright you two, that's enough. Stop acting like an old married couple.
* Dr. House and and his [[HeterosexualLifePartners bromantic best friend]] Dr. Wilson in ''Series/{{House}}''. They even live together for the better part of season 6 and for a few episodes in season 2.
-->'''House''': Please have an answer to this question: what's for dinner?\\
'''Wilson''': You STILL haven't done the dishes?!
* Lily and Marshall in ''Series/HowIMetYourMother''. In one episode, where the couple remains in the bathroom after their friend Ted and girlfriend Victoria don't realize they are home after staving of their anniversary vacation, Lily says that her and Marshall seem like an old married couple...
-->'''Lily:''' ''And we're not even married yet!''
* A memorable scene in ''Series/BabylonFive'' had Londo and G'Kar[[note]]Mutually-hostile Ambassadors from mutually hostile governments[[/note]] arguing, to which a newcomer to the station remarks, "I wonder how long [[FoeYay they've]] been married."
** Of course, jokes about G'Kar and Londo being a married couple go all the way back to the first season, in a weird form of EveryoneCanSeeIt.
** Doctor Franklin and Marcus Cole tended towards this when working together, most particularly when they were undercover in a SmithicalMarriage.[[note]]Leading to a Fanon joke that while G'Kar/Londo is not supported by Canon, Fraklin/Marcus ''is''[[/note]]
** Also Captain John Sheridan and his exec Commander Susan Ivanova, who had worked together even before he was stationed at Babylon 5. Because she's his NumberTwo (and also [[LikeBrotherAndSister his best friend]]), they go back and forth like this a lot, especially when she's playing CommanderContrarian. Unlike many examples of this trope, however, there is ''no'' risk of this relationship turning romantic; Sheridan is desperately in love with [[{{Ambadassador}} Delenn]], and in any case he and Susan acknowledge openly and comfortably that there's absolutely nothing of that sort between them anyway (in the middle of a bickering match that could easily make new viewers think they [[LikeBrotherAndSister actually are siblings]]). This doesn't stop them from interacting like they've been married for decades, though.
* ''{{Friends}}'': Chandler and Monica at times. A hilarious scene has them seriously discussing how to organize their CD's while Rachel, who has actual romantic problems, almost explodes with frustration.
--> Chandler: Well, if we’re gonna do that we should come up with some kind of order. Y’know alphabetically or by genre?
--> Monica: Hmm, I don’t know. We really have to talk this through.
--> Rachel: Oh my God!! You guys have such problems!! I feel so terrible for you
* ''Series/DoctorWho''
** In the episode "Forest of the Dead", one of several arguments between the Doctor and River Song is interrupted by a character remarking that they're "squabbling like an old married couple". [[spoiler:Naturally, ''they are'', in fact, married.]]
** The like-an-old-married-couple-factor is taken to the next level in "The Big Bang". [[spoiler:When the Doctor saves River from a constant time-loop, he teleports into the TARDIS and saves her life that way.]] The following dialogue occurs:
--->'''The [[Creator/MattSmith Eleventh Doctor]]''': "Honey, I'm home!"\\
'''River''': "And what sort of time do you call this?"
** "The Pandorica Opens." ''Christ.''
--->'''The Eleventh Doctor''': You graffitied the oldest cliff face in the universe!\\
'''River''': ''You'' wouldn't answer your ''phone!''
** The first time Amy Pond met River, she eventually asked if River and the Doctor were married.
** The [[Creator/TomBaker Fourth Doctor]] and Romana in the Classic series. True for [[TheNthDoctor both of her]], as Romana I's book-smart personality clashes with the Doctor's street-wise nature and Romana II... well... [[RomanceOnTheSet yeah.]]
** The [[Creator/DavidTennant Tenth Doctor]] and Donna Noble. There had to be a reason why everyone kept mistaking them for married. Ironic, since Donna is the only long-term female companion in New Who who ''isn't'' hot for the Doctor.
** The Sixth Doctor and Peri seemed to do this a lot. Every episode with them has them exchanging insults and arguing about the stupidest things.
** And now added onto the list of girls who argue provocatively with the Doctor, [[CargoShip we have the old girl herself]], in "The Doctor's Wife".
--->''The Eleventh Doctor:''' You are ''not'' my mother!\\
'''[[spoiler:TARDIS]]-Idris:''' And ''you'' are not my child!
* ''Series/StarTrekTheOriginalSeries'' seemed to have an old married threesome:
** Kirk and [=McCoy=].
** The BelligerentSexualTension between [[HoYay McCoy and Spock]].
** Kirk and Spock would be the most obvious example, especially in the movies.
* Lenni from ''Series/{{Ghostwriter}}'' gets pissed off at her dad after he remarks that she and the boy she's working on a school project with are acting "like an old married couple."
* The NotThatTheresAnythingWrongWithThat TropeNamer episode of ''Series/{{Seinfeld}}'' has the reporter who thinks Jerry and George are a gay couple include the line "The two bicker about the cleanliness of a piece of fruit like an old married couple." in her article about Jerry.
* ''Series/{{NCIS}}''. ("One Shot One Kill"). Kate is bickering with [=DiNozzo=] about his driving.
-->'''Gibbs''': Brings back memories.\\
'''Kate''': Memories of what?\\
'''Gibbs''': Marriage.
** Tony and [=McGee=], in "Guilty Pleasure".
--->'''Ziva''': You know what, you two? I have actually heard of this. You two are having a seven year bitch.\\
'''Tony''': Itch, and yes we are.\\
'''Ziva''': You two are like a married couple.
** Tony and Ziva themselves can be like this.
** Gibbs and Jenny Shepard often resembled this too. She stole his coffee, he used her glasses, and they generally acted comfortable around each other, though they also had amazing arguments.
--->'''Gibbs''': No they're not - [[CrowningMomentOfFunny they're still speaking]].
** Oddly, Gibbs and FBI's Tobias Fornell also qualified as this sometimes.
* ''Series/ICarly'': Freddie and Carly act like this, but more the "familiar and comfortable with one another" side than the bickering one.
** When Sam and Freddie end up dating, they [[AvertedTrope don't]] fight Like An Old Married Couple. They fight like ''Sam and Freddie''. Constantly bickering, picking each other apart, escalating arguments, never ending fights and dragging Carly into them, until Carly gets fed up and chews them out, saying if they can't ''stop'' fighting, they shouldn't be dating at all.
* ''Series/StargateSG1'':
** Daniel Jackson and Jack O'Neill. This does help in at least three cases to help prove the identity of one of them:
*** In "Holiday", an old alien scientist switches bodies with Daniel, so Daniel has to convince the others that he really is trapped in an old man's body. O'Neill asks what color Daniel's sister's dress was when they went out last time. Daniel retorts that he doesn't have a sister, and if he did, he'd never let her date Jack.
*** In "Crystal Skull", Daniel is stuck out-of-phase and cannot be heard or seen except by his grandfather Nick. Daniel has Nick repeat everything he says exactly. Jack is being his usual smart-ass self and comments on how Daniel has "lost a lot of weight". Daniel absently comments "Jack, don't be an ass." Nick, of course, repeats the phrase verbatim, prompting O'Neill to realize that only Daniel would say that.
*** In "Fragile Balance", a teenager claiming to be Jack O'Neill (actually, a clone) arrives to the [=SGC=] and tries to prove he is who he says he is. Then arrives Daniel, prompting this exchange.
---->'''O'Neill Clone:''' Daniel! Will you tell them who I am? Please?\\
'''Daniel Jackson:''' Okay. Love to. Who are you?\\
'''General Hammond:''' This boy claims he's Colonel O'Neill.\\
'''Daniel Jackson:''' This is a joke right?\\
'''O'Neill Clone:''' Daniel!\\
'''Daniel Jackson:''' Sounds like him, at least the loud grating part.
** Daniel and Vala. When those two get started, it's best to just sit back and get ready to laugh, a lot.
* ''Series/StargateAtlantis'': Sheppard and Weir. Their bickering about intergalactic space vampires and a mythological city comes across like arguing about washing up duty.
* ''Series/SiskelAndEbert''
** While not nearly as often, there were a few times where Ebert and Richard Roeper had this (though the generational gap made it seem more like a father/son disagreement). Also happened a few times after Roger left with Roeper and Michael Phillips.
* On ''Series/TheXFiles'', Mulder and Scully are frequently like this. In the beginning, it was bickering over scientific versus paranormal, but after awhile it was just... married couple bickering. They are often mistaken for a married couple by non-recurring characters. And to put this in perspective, Mulder's nickname at the FBI is "Spooky". Scully's? "Mrs. Spooky".
** From "Syzygy":
--->'''Mulder''': Eh, Scully, if I'm not mistaken, we're gonna be taking a left up here. Eh, there's an intersection up here, you're gonna wanna... Scully! You're gonna, wanna... You just ran a stop sign back there, Scully.\\
'''Scully''': Shut up, Mulder.\\
'''Mulder''': Sure, fine, whatever.
** Nowhere does it get more obvious than the season 6 episode "Arcadia", in which they go [[UndercoverAsLovers undercover as a married couple]]. The FridgeBrilliance of that episode is that it wasn't originally an X-File, it was simply a missing-person case in a creepy neighborhood. Which means out of all the male/female FBI pairs, whoever headed this case felt that ''Mulder and Scully'' would be most believable as a married couple.
** From "Bad Blood": Mulder and Scully are waiting for a meeting and both are very nervous and anxious because Mulder stuck a stake through a teenager's chest, and the Bureau might face a major law suit and obviously he might end up in prison. Scully tries to adjust Mulder's tie and he just angrily pushes her hands away. She then pesters him to keep reminding their supervisor that he was drugged, which he refuses, convinced that he has killed a vampire. When AD Skinner appears, the very first thing Mulder very eagerly says? "I was drugged!"
* All three presenters on ''Series/TopGear'', but particularly [[VitriolicBestBuds Jeremy Clarkson and James May]].
* ''Series/{{Psych}}''
** Shawn and Gus. Fangirls ''will'' tell you, "THEY ARE SO MARRIED!!!" Though, they are legally domestic partners.
** Shawn and Lassiter.
* ''Series/TheBigBangTheory'':
** Raj and Howard are called out on this multiple times, most notably by Leonard's incredibly blunt scientist mother who asserts that Raj is afraid of women and Howard has unresolved Oedipal issues, so it's not surprising they've formed "an ersatz homosexual marriage."
** When Leonard wanted time alone [[LongDistanceRelationship to Skype]] with his girlfriend, Sheldon patiently waited at Penny's apartment. They were both doing their own things, reading on the couch and chair and Penny mentioned how it feels like they are an old married couple (they are friends but no one can annoy each other the way the other can). They get into a mock fight where Sheldon demanded she get a treat, Penny asked for a divorce and Sheldon said to get the treat on the way to the lawyers office. They both briefly laugh over their "argument."
** Leonard and Penny tried to hang out as merely friends and found that they had a lot of [[{{UST}} unresolved issues]] between them that caused them to argue. It really surfaced when they went to a bar and both of them tried to chat up other people, leading to embarassing secrets being discussed openly.
* ''Series/TheFreshPrinceOfBelAir'': Will invoked this about his bickering with Jazz. Jazz's response, naturally, "Oh, now I'm 'old'?!"
* ''Series/TheGoodies'' had an episode in which Tim and Bill bickered about dinner in this fashion, complete with snarky hissing and turning their backs on one another. Context: Tim was giving a gourmet meal to a guinea pig. ([[ItMakesSenseInContext It Makes Sense In...uh...]]further...[[BuffySpeak contexty...things...]])
-->'''Tim:''' ...Ruddy 'ell!\\
'''Bill:''' ''Surely'' you're not resentful toward a little kindness for one of our dumb friends?\\
'''Tim:''' The only dumb friend I've got is you!\\
'''Bill:''' Well, ''thank'' you, after I make supper for you--\\
'''Tim:''' Look, we can hardly afford to feed ourselves, and you start giving four-course meals to ''flaming guinea pigs''!\\
'''Bill:''' ''[turns his back]'' Temper, temper...\\
'''Tim:''' Well, since when have we eaten that well!\\
'''Bill:''' Since when indeed, yes...what did we get last time ''you'' cooked supper, eh? ''[Tim turns his back as well] A bowl of corn flakes!'' Yes, and [[LethalChief they were burnt]]...\\
'''Tim:''' Well, better than your soggy lettuce and potato peelings...\\
'''Bill:''' ''[turns back around, snapping]'' On the money you give me you're very lucky to get anything at all, I can tell you! ''[turning his back, hands on hips]'' Oh, I've a good urge to go back to mother's...\\
'''Tim:''' Well go.\\
'''Bill:''' I shall.\\
'''Graeme:''' ''Now listen!''\\
'''Bill and Tim:''' ''AND YOU KEEP OUT OF THIS!''\\
'''Graeme:''' Tim, you are being very, very silly!\\
'''Tim:''' Oh, you always take sides with ''him'', don't you...
* ''Series/RoyalPains'' has Divya and Evan set up on a "kiss and make up date" by Hank.
-->'''Divya:''' Here's an idea--let's have dinner, but absolutely no conversation.\\
'''Evan''': Yeah, like we're married.
* ''Series/{{Bones}}'' and Booth argue about everything, but [[EveryoneCanSeeIt no-one doubts that they love each other]].
** They are aware of it too, but they're just terrible at timing. Booth first confesses his feelings at the end of Season 5, but Bones is not ready. This causes them to break up the team and leave (Bones to a dig, and Booth to Afghanistan). After 7 months, they come back, but Booth has already found someone else. Then Bones has a revelation and realizes she missed her once chance with Booth. Then Booth has a bad break-up with his girlfriend but warns Bones that his heart was broken one too many times, and they can only stay friends and colleagues, nothing more. But then, they had sex and now they're having a baby.
* In the ''Series/GilmoreGirls'' episode "Happy Birthday, Baby", Lane witnesses one of Rory and Jess's arguments and even says as much. Jess is noticeably pleased.
-->'''Jess''': Hey.\\
'''Rory''': Hey.\\
'''Jess''': I got the video for tonight.\\
'''Rory''': What’d you get?\\
'''Jess''': ''Film/AlmostFamous''.\\
'''Rory''': No, not again.\\
'''Jess''': I can’t help it, I’m addicted.\\
'''Rory''': Fine, but if I’m going to spend two hours sitting there watching Kate Hudson commit suicide again, then we are ordering Indian food.\\
'''Jess''': Oh, come on.\\
'''Rory''': Hey, last night when we watched ''Film/EdWood'' we got burgers like you wanted to.\\
'''Jess''': Okay, fine – tonight, Indian food, but tomorrow, ''SaturdayNightFever'' and Thai food.\\
'''Lane''': That’s so cute. You’re like a really sweet old agoraphobic couple.\\
'''Jess''': Thank you very much.
** Ironically Jess's uncle Luke and Rory's mother Lorelai have the same dynamic, much to the amusement of the other characters.
* During the ''AshesToAshes'' GrandFinale, Shaz mentions that she's amazed Chris and Ray never tied the knot.
* [[HeterosexualLifePartners J.D. and Turk]] on ''Series/{{Scrubs}}''. For instance, when Dr Cox sees J.D. welcoming Turk and Carla back from their honeymoon:
-->'''Dr Cox''': Ghandi, Mrs Ghandi ... Carla.
** They even do it to themselves:
--->'''Turk''': When Sam gets older I teach him about sports and stuff, and you're in charge of Izzy's emotional crap. We agreed, that's how we'd raise our kids.\\
'''J.D.''': "Our kids"? Turk, we're not married.\\
'''Turk''': Dude, we're a ''little'' married.\\
'''J.D.''': I know, I love it.
** This hasn't escaped Carla's notice either, for that matter.
--->'''Carla''': Tell me my husband loves me more than he loves you.
--->'''J.D.''': It's about the same.
--->'''Carla''': (''sighs, smiling'') I'll take it.
* It has been noted [[EveryoneCanSeeIt by several observers]] that the frequently-bickering-yet-[[{{UST}} intensely-close friendship]] that ''Series/{{Castle}}'s'' Richard Castle and Detective Kate Beckett have become embroiled in is like, well, they're already married (or at least in a relationship). In one notable example, a suggestion that they brainstorm from the perspective of a married couple ended up with the two of them arguing like a married couple about ''being'' a married couple.
* In ''Series/SevenDays'', Frank and Olga needed to infiltrate a cult holed up in a country house. Their superiors suggest they go in as husband and wife. Some arguments ensue, and we get...
-->"Sounds married to me"
* [[{{Cloudcuckoolander}} Glitch]] and [[PapaWolf Cain]] of SyFy's ''Series/TinMan'', starting pretty much immediately after they meet. And that's not where the HoYay ends, either.
* A ''Series/LawAndOrder''/''Series/HomicideLifeOnTheStreet'' crossover has one of the Baltimore detectives theorizing that Briscoe and Munch were "married in a former life."
* In the new ''Series/HawaiiFive0'' Steve and Danny have this in spades. They spend nearly every minute of screentime bickering and it has been lampshaded by other characters several times "How long have you two been married?" and "Are you talking to your wife?" They even managed to bicker whilst confronting a serial killer who had a hostage on a clifftop (though the argument is partially staged as a ploy to distract the criminal.)
-->'''Danny:''' *talking to the criminal* Listen to me, I know what’s it like to have someone you love walk away from you.\\
'''Steve:''' *to Danny* What are you doing?\\
'''Danny:''' What?\\
'''Steve:''' What are you doing, the guy’s clearly a psychopath, you’re trying to make friends with him? You’re trying to connect?\\
'''Danny:''' He’s standing right here in front of us!\\
'''Steve:''' Danny you’re a cop, not a therapist.\\
'''Danny:''' Hey, hey I’ve been trained for this kind of thing okay!\\
'''Steve:''' What, to bore people into submission?\\
'''Danny:''' *to the criminal* Don’t listen to him okay, he’s idea of communication is he drops a witty one liner and shoots you in the face!\\
'''Steve:''' You know what maybe I should just shoot this guy so he doesn’t have to listen to you talk!
** Also notable is the 'Sexy Eyes' [[FanNickname cargument:]]
--->*Steve turns on the radio; Sexy Eyes is playing*\\
* pause, in which Danny's face is a CMOF all on its own*\\
'''Danny:''' Are you serious?\\
'''Steve:''' What?\\
'''Danny:''' You’re not going to change this?\\
'''Steve:''' What’s wrong with this?\\
'''Danny:''' You're going to leave this, you’re not going to do something about this?\\
'''Steve:''' Its okay.\\
'''Danny:''' It's okay?! Alright, listen. I know you have been trained to endure torture, okay, but this is unbearable! This is not right, songs this bad make stable people wanna kill other people, understand?\\
* Danny turns the radio off*\\
{{*beat*}}\\
'''Steve:''' I think it's kind of catchy… *turns it back on*
** In the season four episode "Kupu'eu", Danny tries to start an argument with Joe White about the shocks on his car (the two traveling down a dirt road at the time). Joe invokes the trope by name while asking if that's all Danny and Steve do in the car.
* ''Series/InspectorLynley'': The eponymous Inspector Lynley and his partner Sergeant Barbara Havers, at least once they've got comfortable with each other. By the end of the programme, they practically ''are'' married -- it's just not sexual. [[UnresolvedSexualTension Yet]].
* John and Sherlock of ''Series/{{Sherlock}}'' fit this trope perfectly. Their constant bickering over silly things, like whose turn it is to buy the milk and where Sherlock puts his experiments, comes off very much like a married couple -- especially because they're flatmates, partners-in-crime-solving ''and'' HeterosexualLifePartners. It's one of the reasons they're constantly MistakenForGay. Mrs. Hudson even refers to one of their quarrels as "a little domestic."
* ''Series/StarskyAndHutch'' tend to bicker like this a lot.
* During the RashomonStyle episode of ''Series/{{Supernatural}}'', Bobby calls Sam and Dean out on this as they try to paint each other in the worst possible light.
-->'''Dean:''' No, see, married couples can get divorced. Me and him? We're like, uh, Siamese twins.\\
'''Sam:''' It's ''conjoined'' twins!\\
'''Dean:''' See what I mean?
** Done again in the episode "Pac-Man Fever"
-->'''Dean:''' Sounds like something you should read about. In a book. At home.
-->'''Sam:''' I'm not leaving until we find out whatever is doing this.\\
'''Dean:''' Whatever. [stalks off]\\
'''Charlie:''' You guys fight like an old married couple.
* Josh and Donna on ''Series/TheWestWing''. At one point they spend an entire episode arguing over whether their anniversary is in February or in April (the anniversary of when she came to work for him, that is).
** POTUS and Leo also act like this on occasion. (Both actors admitted to this in interviews, but each claimed that the other was the wife.)
--->'''Bartlet''': Honey, if we're gonna have this fight, can we not do it in front of the Joint Chiefs? It just scares the hell out of them.
* Parodied on a 1997 episode of ''Series/WheelOfFortune'' where, in the final segment, host Pat Sajak and hostess Vanna White are at a table, respectively reading a newspaper and knitting. They both joke that people often interpret them as a married couple (even though in RealLife, both are happily married to different people), with Pat nodding and bluntly finishing all of Vanna's sentences.
* ''Series/CovertAffairs ''Annie and Auggie, definitely. It's lampshaded in the season 2 episode "Half a World Away". Auggie is in Turkey, not answering his phone, and Annie is getting ''very'' worried [[spoiler: with ''good reason!'']]. Cue the random stewardess Auggie is with at the time getting an unexpected phone call:
-->'''Annie:''' *Annoyed tone of voice* Hi, can I talk to Auggie, please?
-->'''Franka:''' It's for you. I think it's your wife. She sounds rather upset...
* Damon and Elena in {{Series/The Vampire Diaries}}. So much. He even rummages through her underwear drawer! They have a bad case of {{Slap Slap Kiss}} , and bicker more than they get along, but if one is in trouble, there's nothing the other wouldn't do to help them.
* ''Series/{{Glee}}'' has Blaine and Kurt, who, in their own words, are "like a fabulous old married couple."
* Partners Jay Halstead and Erin Lindsay on ''{{Series/Chicago PD}}'', and they've only been working together for a relatively short time. She never lets him drive and he complains that he feels like a house husband, he beats up a guy who catcalls and rudely flirts with her, and they argue a lot, especially about Erin's father figure (and their boss) Voight. Heck, they even argue about their maybe-not-so-professional relationship.
-->'''Jay''': Did you see the look on his face?
-->'''Erin''': Yeah. So?
-->'''Jay''': So?
-->'''Erin''': We haven't done anything.
-->'''Jay''': Don't I know it.
-->'''Erin''': Would you just spit out whatever fit is that you're trying to spit out?
-->'''Jay''': Okay. Maybe this last month I don't wanna be the guy you use to get a rise out of your father figure.
-->'''Erin''': You wish I was using you.
-->'''Jay''': Oh, I'm serious. You have issues, you need to work them out. Work them out without me.
-->'''Erin''': I repeat, we haven't done anything. And if you wanna keep it that way-
-->'''Jay''': Hey, that'd be great.
-->'''Erin''': (annoyed) All right, perfect.
-->'''Jay''': Fantastic.
-->'''Erin''': You done?
-->'''Jay''': I was done long before this conversation started.
-->'''Erin''': Really? Then shut up.
** and then later on...
-->'''Erin''': Dinner at The Purple Pig? It's got the dump.
-->'''Jay''': Those things suck.
-->'''Erin''': I don't think so.
-->'''Jay''': Besides, you just told me to shut up and that we're done.
-->'''Erin''': No, you told me we were done. But a girl's gotta eat.
-->'''Jay''': (annoyed) Now you're hungry.
* Lucien and Jean in ''Series/TheDoctorBlakeMysteries'' are mistaken for husband and wife on several occasions. They don't always bother to correct this.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Radio]]
* During a discussion of gay marriage on ''TheNewsQuiz'', Alan Coren claimed to be in "a form of marriage" with his regular ''News Quiz'' and ''Call My Bluff'' sparring partner Sandi Toksvig (it may or may not be relevent that Sandi is in fact a lesbian).
-->'''Alan:''' The exact form this takes is not easily defined...\\
'''Sandi:''' Now, I've explained this; it'll be like any other marriage. We won't have sex, we'll just sit in bed and eat burgers.\\
'''Alan''': We did that last week.\\
({{Beat}})\\
'''Sandi''': That's true, actually...
* Film critic MarkKermode and radio presenter Simon Mayo are often compared to an old married couple - by others as well as themselves.
-->'''Simon Mayo (reading a listener's complaint about her husband not listening to her opinion on films anymore)''': "This is for the sake of marital harmony"\\
'''Mark Kermode''': What, ours?
* On ''Series/TheAmazingRace 3'', Terri & Ian ''are'' a married couple who've been together over twenty years and fit this trope like a glove.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Theatre]]
* In the final scene ''Theatre/TheMoonIsBlue'', when Patty suddenly starts arguing with Don about spending so much money on gambling, he tells her: "Will you kindly shut up? We're not married yet." She smiles, realizing what he's just said.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Video Games]]
* ''Franchise/TalesSeries''
** Asbel and Cheria are like this from time to time in ''VideoGame/TalesOfGraces'':
---> '''Cheria:''' (to Sophie) Come on!\\
'''Sophie:''' No.\\
'''Asbel:''' What's going on guys?\\
'''Cheria:''' Sophie is too picky about what she wants to eat. Come on!\\
'''Sophie:''' (cowers behind Asbel) No.\\
'''Asbel:''' Don't be like that Cheria. She doesn't have to eat something she doesn't want to.\\
'''Cheria:''' *sigh* You coddle her too much. So what do you want for dinner?\\
'''Asbel:''' Curry sounds good.\\
'''Cheria:''' Mild I take it?\\
'''Asbel:''' Yep.\\
'''Cheria:''' *sigh* You're such a child.
*** Earlier:
---->'''Cheria:''' Sophie, have you been bathing regularly?\\
'''Sophie:''' (tilts head to the side before shaking her head)\\
'''Cheria:''' (DeathGlare at Asbel) You're supposed to be taking care of her!\\
'''Asbel:''' I '''AM''' taking care of her. But I mean '''COME ON'''! There's only so much one person can do.\\
'''Cheria:''' *sigh* (exasperated) I guess you're right.
** Mary observes this of Rutee and Stahn at their very first meeting in ''VideoGame/TalesOfDestiny''. Not surprisingly, the pair inevitably become the OfficialCouple and their son even becomes the star of the sequel, TOD 2.
** Flynn's joining the party in ''VideoGame/TalesOfVesperia'' PS3 gives much more opportunity to learn about his and Yuri's relationship. This trope describes their arguments quite nicely.
** Same thing with the prequel film ''First Strike.'' Flynn squabbles with Yuri about cleaning their room and Yuri's reply is "Yes, ''mom''."
* Parodied by Etna in ''VideoGame/Disgaea2CursedMemories'' when Adell and Rozalin argue.
-->'''Etna:''' Ah, how cute! You two have one of ''[[BelligerentSexualTension those]]'' kind of relationships going...
* ''VideoGame/MassEffect2'': when you talk to Kasumi on the ''Normandy'', she will mention that Joker and EDI are like an old married couple. [[SheIsNotMyGirlfriend EDI claims that]] what they have is [[SpockSpeak "a platonic symbiosis rather than hormonally induced courtship behavior"]].
** The ''Lair of the Shadow Broker'' DLC has [[RunningGag frequent]] spats between Liara and Shepard throughout it, especially when Shepard DrivesLikeCrazy and Liara plays the BackseatDriver.
--->'''Liara''': You're enjoying this, aren't you?
** ''VideoGame/MassEffect3:[[{{DLC}} Citadel]]'' has Shepard do this with his/her other love interests.[[note]]Exact wording of the love interest's dialogue depends on the character.[[/note]]
-->'''Shepard:''' (''preparing to shoot a door open'') Stand back!\\
'''Love Interest:''' Wait. (''politely knocks on the window and asks'') Could you open the door for us?\\
(''door opens'')\\
'''Love Interest:''' Thank you.\\
'''Volus Skycar Manager:''' Please leave!\\
'''Love Interest:''' (''looks smug'')\\
'''Shepard:''' Well I could have done that.
* ''Franchise/DragonAge'':
** ''VideoGame/DragonAgeOrigins'' and ''VideoGame/DragonAgeOriginsAwakening'' feature a blacksmith shop run by Wade and Herren, both men. [[TalkerAndDoer One is the perfectionist craftsman, the other is the businessman exasperated by the other's insistence on perfectionism over making money.]] They very obviously argue like an old married couple. WordOfGod confirms [[http://social.bioware.com/forum/1/topic/9/index/1895300/1#1898481 that they are, indeed, an old married couple.]]
** Finn and Arianne, the temporary companions from the ''Origins'' DLC "Witch Hunt", manage to do this very well, despite having next to zero things in common (he is a prudish young human mage who had a very cloistered life in the Circle, she is a badass Elven hunter-warrior) and having only met each other recently.
* In ''VideoGame/KingdomHeartsII'', there’s a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it moment with [[strike:Squall]] [[ThatManIsDead Leon]] and [[VideoGame/FinalFantasyVII Aerith]], in which the former ask the later if she’ll be okay by herself ([[RobotWar the whole town was currently in a crisis]]) while he goes out to retrieve something, and her only reply is to [[DeathGlare coldly stare]] at him, [[CrowningMomentOfFunny who decides to shut up and leave]].
* During the ''VideoGame/{{Portal 2}}'' [[CoOpMultiplayer co-op]] {{speedrun}} [[http://www.twitch.tv/speeddemosarchivesda/b/304536039 at Awesome Games Done Quick 2012]], the other viewers joked that there was this kind of chemistry between romscout and [=ShadowWraith=].
** In the [[http://www.twitch.tv/speeddemosarchivesda/b/305374114 bonus]] [[http://www.twitch.tv/speeddemosarchivesda/b/305374119 stream]], Flicky and PJ had a similar dynamic when they played ''The Adventures of Cookie & Cream.''
* [[LampshadeHanging Lampshaded]] in ''VisualNovel/PhoenixWrightAceAttorneyDualDestinies'', because [[HoYay Edgeworth and Phoenix]] have finally hit that stage. Bobby Fullbright even points out that they're "close enough to argue." In their brief appearance in court together they don't so much argue over facts as quibble about interrupting each other:
-->'''Phoenix:''' (after Edgeworth withholds some info) Why didn't you just say so in the first place?
-->'''Edgeworth:''' You're the one who screamed "HOLD IT!" and cut me off!
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Web Animation]]
* ''Machinima/RedVsBlue: The Blood Gulch Chronicles''
-->'''Tucker:''' I'm still picking up the reds' transmissions from when we broadcast that Lopez song. There's a lot of chatter.\\
'''Church:''' Well, are you at least getting any useful information?\\
'''Tucker:''' Nah, it's just the same two guys bickering like an old married couple. I've only been listening for like five minutes and I can already tell they're really in love. Why can't they see it?
** Exhibit uh... 807:
--->'''Grif:''' Hey, what are you doing?\\
'''Simmons:''' What does it look like? I'm getting in the jeep.\\
'''Grif:''' What are we, on a date? Get in the back.\\
'''Simmons:''' Oh, you're so insecure.
* Parodied, along with HoYay, in the ''HomestarRunner'' episode "Date Nite". Bubs goes on a date with Marzipan, and HeterosexualLifePartner Coach Z -- with curlers in his hair and a rolling pin in his hand -- gets angry.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Web Comics]]
* Practically every character who is sarcastic or has a bad temperament in ''Webcomic/{{Homestuck}}'' (Read: EVERYONE) is prone to this, most notably Karkat with Terezi, Rose with Dave, and Dirk with Roxy.
* ''Webcomic/TheInexplicableAdventuresOfBob'', Bob [[http://bobadventures.comicgenesis.com/d/20070828.html says this]] to the [[SpacePirates Pirates of Ipecac.]] And it turns out he's right!
* The Reaper and Bryony in [[http://catenamanor.com/?p=102 this]] ''{{Catena}}'' strip. Literal WordofGod.
* ''Webcomic/GirlGenius'' had it PlayedForLaughs with Moloch commenting on Violetta and Tarvek [[http://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php?date=20080926 here]]. With IronicEcho when Tarvek reflects it on Violetta and Moloch himself (she had some interest in him, though it's not clear how much reciprocated) [[http://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php?date=20110425 later]].
* ''Webcomic/DumbingOfAge'':
** This is how Dorothy defines Billie and Walky's relationship. [[http://www.dumbingofage.com/2011/comic/book-2/01-pajama-jeans/something/ Billie is not amused]].
** When Joe and Danny start bickering, Jacob [[http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/03-answers-in-hennessy/dan-it/ comments]] "You guys are a little married, huh."
* Tagii in ''Webcomic/SchlockMercenary'' while [[http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2010-11-25 joking about "her" self and the captain]] after he was inconvenienced by [[IWantGrandkids his father's wishes to get him married]]. Of course, Tagii is an AI... but they both know it's possible -- Tagon personally knows two AI who got WetwareBody, one of which indeed married a human -- so his stunned reaction was not groundless.
** [[RetiredBadAss Karl Tagon]] jokes about [[http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2012-04-02 Kathryn and Nick]] -- he didn't know yet that their history together doesn't leave much chances to ''that'', but they indeed ''did'' shut up.
* Zoe and Suki of the OEL manga ''Webcomic/VampireCheerleaders'' are like [[http://www.vampirecheerleaders.net/strips-vc/meet_the_parents_12 this.]] Lori even tells them to quit the fighting and get to the lesbian sex.
* Anak Zahard's parents in ''Webcomic/TowerOfGod''. Sure, her [[RebelliousPrincess mother]] mourns the lack of luxury from her old days as Zahard's princess; sure, they fight a lot, but dammit, they are risking their lives to be together and he makes [[SeriousBusiness the best damn chicken pie of the whole Tower]], so they make it work.
* This is how Mary describes [[http://www.bringbackroomies.com/comic/no-reason/ Billie and Danny arguing]] in ''Webcomic/{{Roomies}}'' (yes, same Billie as [=DoA=], or at least an AU version). ''Neither'' of them are amused.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Western Animation]]
* The ''WesternAnimation/JusticeLeague'' episode "Hearts and Minds" opens with Hawkgirl and Green Lantern arguing in the middle of repairing the Watchtower. The Flash walks by and remarks, "Geez, you two sound like an old married couple." HG and GL are then completely silent (presumably from embarrassment).
* In ''WesternAnimation/{{WITCH}}'', when Will discovers she can bring inanimate objects to life, her computer and printer react like this.
* ''WesternAnimation/CodeLyoko'': [[EveryoneCanSeeIt Everyone]] but, well, [[{{UST}} Yumi and Ulrich]] are prone to observing how Yumi and Ulrich argue like this.
* WordOfGod has described ''WesternAnimation/TeenTitans''' Beast Boy and Raven like this. [[RelationshipWritingFumble It worked too well]], and led to the two [[FanPreferredCouple gaining a sizeable fanbase online]]. The two eventually became a canonical pairing in the regular DC comics, and ended the pre-New 52 universe together (it didnt carry over into the reboot).
* Played with on ''WesternAnimation/FamilyGuy'' when Stewie (pretending to be a teenager) tells his "date" that they'll be "just like an old married couple!" He says it enthusiastically, but the ensuing CutawayGag shows aged-up versions of the two of them glaring at each other from opposite ends of a table.
** Parodied again when Chris runs away form home and moves in with Herbert the pedophile. While Herbert spends the first ten minutes of his screen time going through his usual schtick of trying to get in Chris' pants (with his usual lack of success) by the end of the episode they've devolved into a sexless pseudo-marriage between a slob and a neat freak.
-->'''Chris:''' [[DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything Well I was only PRETENDING to be]] [[CrossesTheLineTwice lightheaded!]] "Oh, this Kool-Aid tastes funny... ohhh! Ohhhh, ahhhhh" Sound familiar?!
* ''WesternAnimation/TimeSquad'': Larry 3000 and Buck Tuddrussel act like this from the get-go, heck in one episode Larry told him that [[ExiledToTheCouch he's sleeping on the sofa!]]
* In the ''WesternAnimation/PhineasAndFerb'' episode "Phineas and Ferb Interrupted", Perry the Platypus and his [[FriendlyEnemy nemesis]] Dr. Doofenshmirtz are fighting over the controls to one of Doof's evil inventions:
-->'''Doofenshmirtz:''' Awww, Perry the Platypus, look at us! We're fighting over the remote like an old married couple! ''(Severely)'' It's not cute.
* ''WesternAnimation/TheGrimAdventuresOfBillyAndMandy'': [[ShesNotMyGirlfriend Despite Billy's protest]] (and the fact that both are in denial), Billy and Mandy's relationship is basically a cynical DeadpanSnarker wife dealing with her idiot husband's exploits. Why else would Mandy ''willingly'' hang out with Billy?
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Real Life]]
* Creator/ChrisFarley and Creator/DavidSpade, which was endearing when the friendship didn't border on childish possessiveness. They were undoubtedly best friends, but they could get into some pretty fierce fights, both verbal and physical. On the set of ''Film/TommyBoy'', they would sometimes go for hours without talking to each other, talk to each other through the director, etc. And when Rob Lowe -- who said that they acted like an old married couple -- got thrown into the mix... Well, let's just say that Chris's reaction to their "buddies' bar night" was of epic {{Yandere}}sque proportions. David got so fed up with Chris hounding him on the subject that he threw his Diet Coke on him, to which Chris responded by ''[[DisproportionateRetribution throwing David into a wall and down the stairs]].''
-->'''David Spade''': Chris was actually jealous of Rob Lowe. He admitted it later. That's probably [[HoYay why I'm not married now]]; [[LampshadeHanging my first experience didn't work out]].
* Creator/GeneSiskel and Creator/RogerEbert.
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