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-> '''Donkey''': Whoa. Look at that. Who'd wanna live in a place like that?!\\
'''Shrek''': That would be my home.\\
'''Donkey''': [[VerbalBackspace Oh, and it is LOVELY. You know, you're really quite a decorator.]]
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/{{Shrek}}''

A character is lecturing another character then somehow, either by someone else telling them the truth afterwards or the one they are lecturing breaking down or otherwise indicating that they've gone too far, the character realizes that they have been a complete {{Jerkass}}.

It may have been a TheReasonYouSuckSpeech, but it's gone too far.

One variation is a normally nice character ripping into another character that they don't think is present, not realizing until afterwards that the character they are ripping on ''was'' in earshot, and realizing that even if they had a point, they were being a jerk.

Could be considered a minor version of MyGodWhatHaveIDone and HeelRealization.

----
!!Examples

[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder: Anime and Manga ]]


* ''Manga/{{Naruto}}'':
** When Kakashi has Sasuke tied to a tree pre-time skip and is talking about how nothing good ever comes of revenge, Sasuke accuses Kakashi of not understanding, and proposes killing everyone Kakashi holds dear, but then Kakashi says all his loved ones are already dead. Sasuke then stops talking long enough for Kakashi to tell him that they have lost much in the past, but gained new comrades, and that he should be using his Chidori to protect those comrades, rather than on his quest for revenge. Admittedly Sasuke's ''[[TookALevelInJerkass later character]]'' outshines this little moment, still was a accidental Jerkass moment.
** [[spoiler:Sasuke finally realizes what a dick he's been and decides to figure out the real reason he fights.]]
** Earlier on, Sakura starts complaining about how Naruto turned out spoiled because he had no parents to discipline him, and Sasuke angrily tells her that she has no idea what she's talking about. She then begins to consider being nicer to Naruto.
*** It doesn't help though, because she still winds up unwittingly tormenting him. This culminates in a bogus love confession, which he immediately calls her out on.
* ''VisualNovel/SchoolDays'': Say what you will about Matoko Ito, but he gets hit with his twice in the anime. [[spoiler: Though the second time it happens, he gets hit with a knife in the gut before he can actually make amends.]]
* ''Manga/CardCaptorSakura'': Sakura is firmly convinced that Touya is nothing but a BigBrotherBully and has little more than scorn for him. When she discovers that he [[SecretSecretKeeper knew about the Clow Cards and her magic all along]] and had been looking out for her, and had even [[BroughtDownToNormal sacrificed his sixth sense]] to save her bodyguard Yue, she is left in tearful remorse over how badly she misjudged him.

[[/folder]]

[[folder: Fan Fiction ]]


* In the ''Pokemon'' fanfic ''FanFic/APikachuInLove'', Pikachu has several of these in regards to how coldly he's been acting to Ash, but what really hits home is when [[spoiler: Misty is carrying him back to the camp site after he had been attacked by the Ursaring, and she starts to talk about how much they all love him and how devastated they'd be if something had happened to them, ''especially'' Ash. It's at this point Pikachu realizes just how loved he is, and that Ash would never forget about him or leave him behind.]]
* In ''Fanfic/HarryPotterAndTheMethodsOfRationality'', Harry hears an IHaveThisFriend version of the Snape-Lily-James story by Snape, and draws perfectly reasonable conclusions from what little information he is given...expressing them very bluntly and completely and utterly hurting Snape's feelings. Harry isn't insensitive by all means, but this story taught him he should know exactly what he's talking about before recklessly flapping his mouth.
* The ''WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic'' fic ''[[FanFic/TheNuptialverse Post Nuptials]]'' takes the JerkassRealization Twilight's friends are implied to have in the season 2 finale for ignoring Twilight's warnings against the evil Cadance ([[spoiler:actually an imposter]]), and brings it UpToEleven: here they realize that they'd broken Twilight's heart by turning their backs on her, and profusely beat themselves up over how they could have treated her so coldly.
* In ''FanFic/{{Team 8}}'', Sakura overhears Naruto warning Rock Lee of trying to win her affections because she cares for no one but herself and Sasuke and is not a nice person to begin with. Sakura realizes Naruto is telling the truth and tries to become a better person.
* In the ''FanFic/PoniesOfOlympus'' series, Rainbow Dash has one at the end of ''Ditzy Don't'' when, upon calling out Mademoiselle Doo for treating her like a dumb foal just because she's not as good as her, realizes that that's the ''exact same way'' she's always treated Ditzy.
* Jen's friends undergo this in ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8233291/28/Princess-of-the-Blacks Princess of the Blacks]]'' when Jen starts acting more withdrawn than normal. When they insist she not bottle up her problems and share with them, Jen shares [[RapeAsBackStory some]] of her DarkAndTroubledPast.
** Tracey, who managed to avoid it the first time, really sticks her foot in it when she makes fun of Jen's boggart: a small crying child. Jen curses her out then reveals that her boggart isn't a random child crying over some minor scrape; it's her shortly after being thrown out on the streets and not long before she was raped.
* In ''Fanfic/TheEndOfEnds'', after Beast Boy leaves his resignation letter behind, the other TeenTitans regret how they treated him in response to his behavior following being rejected by Terra. Unfortunately, it's too late for them to make amends and [[FromBadToWorse things get much worse]].
* When [[Film/TheAvengers Tony Stark]] exclaims how [[LivingForeverIsAwesome great]] it is that [[Literature/HarryPotter Harry]] is immortal in ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9512698/4/Master-of-Death-and-What-it-Means Master of Death and What it Means]], the others quickly shoot him down. [[WhoWantsToLiveForever Harry's explanation of what it means to truly be immortal]] makes Tony realize just how insensitive his remark was.
* A rare example of the offended doesn't notice the jerkass moment occurs in ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6693171/1/The-Mouse-of-Konoha The Mouse of Konoha]]''. After Anko remarks that Naruto's ability to juggle is "an interesting trick for a civilian but useless to a shinobi", Naruto explains that he taught himself because none of the other kids would play with him and playing catch by himself got boring after a while. Understandably, Anko feels horrible afterwards.
* Anko again in ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9880657/2/NBH NBH]]'' when she angrily asks Naruto if he knows what it's like to be hated for something that wasn't his fault. It's only after Yuugao explains things to her that Anko realizes/remembers that Naruto is a jinchuuriki.
* In a [[FandomSpecificPlot YAHF]], [[Series/BuffyTheVampireSlayer Buffy]] gets one after Xander rolls up his sleeve and explains he has his costume's full memories when asked if he had anything leftover from his transformation on Halloween. While Giles and Willow are horrified, [[BookDumb Buffy]] doesn't see what the big deal is about such a small tattoo, until Giles explains that it's an [[UsefulNotes/WorldWarII Auschwitz]] tattoo.

[[/folder]]

[[folder: Film ]]


* ''Film/MortalKombat'': Raiden is fond of this trope in the first film.
-->'''Raiden:''' The fate of billions will depend upon you. Heh heh heh heh! ...sorry.
** Rare humorous Jerkass Realization.
* ''WesternAnimation/{{Shrek}}'':
** Donkey says who would want to live in a place like that. That would be Shrek's home.
--->'''Donkey:''' I like that boulder, that is a nice boulder.
** Another Shrek one is where Shrek mistakenly thinks Fiona is talking about him when she says "Big, stupid, ugly beast", he is very rude to her the following day. Donkey sets him straight later though.
* ''Mr. Deeds'': When Babe is stuck in the ice hole and she is asking Deeds for help. Deeds doesn't beleive her and thinks she is trying to play him again; he even lectures her again, but then she goes under and doesn't come back up (until he saves her).
* A meta-example: Jake [=LaMotta=] has said he never truly realized how terribly he treated the people in his life until he saw the events dramatized by Martin Scorsese in ''Film/RagingBull'' (which he worked as a consultant on).

[[/folder]]

[[folder: Literature ]]


* ''Literature/HarryPotter'' There are MANY in Harry Potter.
** Probably was when Ron was craning his neck to get a look at the Longbottom's beds, then he is told of the Longbottom's …''[[FateWorseThanDeath condition.]]''
** When Hermione is ''[[SoapboxSadie lecturing Harry again]]'' about his connection to Voldemort and makes the mistake of saying he likes it. Harry's DeathGlare pretty much shuts her up and has her bending over backwards apologizing.
** The [[spoiler: Magical Maintenance man the trio forced to leave was there to be with his wife when she had to go up against Umbridge and the [[FantasticRacism Anti-Muggle trial]],]] cue Jerkass Realization.
** Slughorn is pretty much a vest wearing walking example of this trope.
** When Hermione criticizes The Quibbler in front of Luna in a very Jerkass way, then finds out Luna's the daughter of the Quibbler's Editor, though seeing as how the girl had been reading it when Hermione walked in, it was rather rude regardless.
** In ''[[Literature/HarryPotterAndTheOrderOfThePhoenix Order of the Phoenix]]'', Dudley has one when he is attacked by the dementor and is [[WordOfGod shown the sort of person he really is]]. This causes Dudley to cease bullying Harry (he is never shown to pick on him again after this point in the books) and try to be a better person (leaving tea outside Harry's room, telling Harry he doesn't think he's a waste of space).
** Harry himself went through this in [[Literature/HarryPotterAndTheOrderOfThePhoenix the fifth book.]] When his mental connection to Voldemort as well as Umbridge's actions at Hogwarts make him rude and short with Ron and Hermione, he realizes how moody he'd been. He tries to reel himself in, though he keeps being rather touchy throughout the book [[spoiler: until Sirius dies.]]
* The novel ''How To Rock Braces and Glasses'' by Meg Haston is basically a book-long one of these for protagonist Kacey Simon. She's the AlphaBitch of her school, but she genuinely believes that her BrutalHonesty is helpful and beneficial to those she uses it on. After losing her popularity due to the sudden acquisition of braces and glasses, she realizes that her fellow students mostly consider her a colossal {{Jerkass}} and sets out to change this fact by being nicer.

[[/folder]]

[[folder: Live Action TV ]]

* ''Series/StargateSG1'' (Episode: Lifeboat) Daniel Jackson has become host for about a dozen different consciousnesses and the team goes back to the planet where it happened, they find the person responsible and Sam pretty much orders him to remove the said consciousnesses from Jackson's mind, thus killing them, theorizing that they are already dead. Then she finds out she just asked the man to kill his 10-year old son. Yep, Sam's a Jerkass.
* ''Series/{{Scrubs}}'': Quite a fan of these moments as well.
** [[spoiler: After JD's father passes away]], JD gets mad at Cox, Cox narrowly averts this trope by getting mad at JD but immediately feeling like a Jerkass, [[spoiler: as he knows JD's father has died]]. Then Ted joins in the taunting of JD, Ted asks why are they clapping and Dr Cox says, "[[spoiler: His dad died]], dammit...." Ted then immediately stops clapping. Ted, You're a Jerkass.
** Also is Season 8 when Elliot is shown how depressed Keith is over her treatment of him.
** A rather odd one in where JD has just revealed to the entire waiting room that he received a DUI last night. Cue flashback to a few minutes ago with [[SassyBlackWoman Nurse Roberts]] saying that a girl involved in an drunk driving accident had made it, but her mother had died. However, the jerkassery lies in the way that he brought it up so flippantly, not in the DUI itself since, as we see earlier in the episode, he actually got it for walking (not driving) his moped home while drunk, with the moped on only to play the radio, making it seem like he was about to get on while intoxicated.
** Dr. Cox is really annoyed by a quite frankly VERY annoying paramedic, even the audience hates her at this point, then he finally and gloriously goes off on her, telling her to go home to her son that she doesn't shut up about. Then another paramedic give Cox a baseball card from the Ambulance they had just left. Cox then remembers that she said it was her son's favorite card and he never went anywhere without it, also how he'll always be the age his is in her picture to her. If you haven't guessed it yet [[spoiler: Her son was killed after being hit by a car]], damn...
* ''{{NCIS}}'' Tony does this when talking about Gibbs often, he mentions things like his divorce rate, or something about bourbon, cue the scene of Gibbs standing behind him, or walking in from nowhere.
* ''Series/ArrestedDevelopment'' A rare moment when a character actually realizes that they've said something terrible:
--> '''Tobias''': [''to Michael''] ...And second-of-ly, I know you're the big marriage expert - oh, I'm sorry, I forgot, your wife is dead!
--> [''Michael and Lindsay stare in silence'']
--> '''Tobias''': I'm sorry, that was one hundred percent inappropriate and I do apologize profusely. I do apologize profusely, I'm - oh...
* In Episode 2x04 of ''Series/{{Glee}}'', [[MarySue Rachel Berry]] has a self-inflicted one of these when she finally realizes that her determination to win at everything and hog all the spotlight, all the time, has made her into a genuinely loathsome individual. She then spends the rest of the episode trying to lose at something so she can consider herself a good person again. Shame it doesn't last - by Episode 2x09 she's walking into class with her mouth taped up in protest over someone else being featured at Sectionals, and when her eternal rival Quinn Fabray hands her [[WhatTheHellHero an immensely satisfying talking-to]] about the selfish 'schoolgirl bubble' in which she lives her life in 2x15, all it inspires is a dreary self-justificatory whine set to music - but it was nice while it did...
* In ''Series/{{Sherlock}}'', the eponymous hero never holds back from [[BrutalHonesty telling the truth as he sees it]], generally [[LackOfEmpathy not caring]] (or [[NoSocialSkills even realizing]]) if he offends or upsets people in the process. But every now and then he has a moment of clarity where he belatedly realizes just how insensitive he’s being. One notable example is when he draws attention to one of Molly’s hand-wrapped Christmas presents, stating that she’s obviously arranged it specifically for someone she has romantic feelings for, and spends a good few minutes rather brutally lampooning her for it, before picking up the parcel and realizing that it’s ''his'' name written on the card (by which time Molly is close to tears and everyone else in the room is massively uncomfortable). For once, he not only realizes what a jerk he has been, he actually ''apologizes'', [[OOCIsSeriousBusiness to the shock of everyone watching]].

[[/folder]]

[[folder: Video Games ]]

* At one point in ''{{VideoGame/Persona 3}}'', Junpei suddenly comes to the conclusion that he had been a jerkass to the protagonist; apologizes, and is more pleasant afterwords. What makes this so surprising is that despite the franchise, this did ''not'' require a BattleInTheCenterOfTheMind or a revelation gained from battling one's [[ADarkerMe dark reflection]].

[[/folder]]

[[folder: Webcomics ]]

* Parodied in ''Webcomic/AnsemRetort''.
-->'''Axel:''' We've faced worse than this. Remember when Disneyworld was destroyed?\\
'''Marluxia:''' Larxene did that.\\
'''Axel:''' Well, what about that plane that got hijacked?\\
'''Marluxia''': ''You hijacked that plane.''\\
'''Axel:''' Okay, but there was that corrupt government.\\
'''Marluxia:''' That was, and still is Zexion.\\
'''Axel:''' Wow, we're [[{{Jerkass}} assholes]].

[[/folder]]

[[folder: Web Original ]]

* ''WebVideo/TheCinemaSnob'' In his review for ''TheZookeeper'', Jerrid blasts Jake for not showing up, thus forcing Jerrid to watch the movie. In the recent ''Film/HarryPotter'' movie, Jake says the reason he didn't show up was because he had a huge family emergency. The audience also probably thought Jake was dipping out so it gets the audience with a Jerkass Realization, along with Jerrid's.

[[/folder]]

[[folder: Western Animation ]]

* ''WesternAnimation/{{Futurama}}'': When Fry is sent to the future and can't go on his date with Leela, for years she thinks he stood her up. Then she gets the Video Card that fell out of the time machine, many years later. She then realizes she has been mad at him her entire life and it wasn't his fault.
* ''WesternAnimation/SpongebobSquarepants'' In the April Fools Day episode, Spongebob keeps pulling silly and (to Squidward) annoying pranks on everyone (such as not putting ice in a customer's drink, which Spongebob thinks is hilarious), Squidward then sets up a elaborate, physically painful and rather cruel prank on Spongebob that causes the latter to leave the Krusty Krab in tears. After all the customers call Squidward out on this and leave, Squidward looks around and seems the damage his "harmless" prank did to the Krusty Krab and SpongeBob and realizes he went to far.
* ''WesternAnimation/TheRenAndStimpyShow'', "Stimpy's Fan Club": Ren becomes jealous of Stimpy getting all the fan mail, so when he finally gets one, he reads it to Stimpy to rub it in his face (even literally rubbing the letter in his face), all the while adding comments on how Stimpy is finished and how he is now the most loved. Then he gets to the end and realizes the letter is from Stimpy himself. Ren, you're a jerkass...and to drive the point home, he briefly turns into a person's ass.
* ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'', Nelson points at his reflection and delivers his trademark laugh. He then remarks, "Hey, that hurts. No wonder no one came to my birthday party."
* ''WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic'' has quite a number of instances:
** In "Suited for Success," Rarity's friends criticize the dresses she makes for them for the Grand Galloping Gala ([[ComplainingAboutThingsYouHaventPaidFor free of charge and out of kindness, mind you]]), and bombard her with suggestions to make the dresses look ''exactly'' the way they want them to. Unfortunately for Rarity, her friends' tacky fashion sense nearly destroys her career when she displays the new dresses at a fashion show attended by an understandably offended critic. The guilt-ridden five make it up to her by completing her own unfinished dress with her designs and throwing another fashion show with the original dresses that blows the critic away.
** Fluttershy has one in the episode "Putting Your Hoof Down." In the episode she takes assertiveness lessons in order to quit being a [[ShrinkingViolet pushover]], but takes them too far and [[TookALevelInJerkAss becomes a jerk]]. She comes to her realization after brutally tearing into Rarity and Pinkie Pie for their love of fashion and parties, respectively, driving them off in tears.
-->"'''I'm''' the monster..."
** Rarity in "Sisterhooves Social". After blowing off her little sister Sweetie Belle as an inconvenience following one too many blunders--shrinking her favorite wool sweater in the wash; using up her spare gemstones to decorate a drawing; and tidying a design room that's ''supposed'' to be messy--Rarity begins to soften when she finds innovative ways to incorporate those blunders into her work. She remains peeved about the gems, though, until she finds them forming a heart shape around Sweetie Belle's drawing of the two sisters. Rarity cries "MyGodWhatHaveIDone" and spends the rest of the episode trying to win her sister back.
** Rainbow Dash learns it very fast in "Hurricane Fluttershy," realizing that her brusque manner of coaching and motivating the other pegusi is only terrifying her friend early in the episode, and makes an effort to be much calmer and praises her when she really improves, despite the improved to level still being a bit low.
*** Played both ways, since Fluttershy first agrees to training out of guilt when a dejected Rainbow Dash submits to her refusal to take part.
*** To a lesser degree, when RD's forcing a visibly sick Thunderlane to participate in training results in him getting several other ponies sick and unable to attend the main task.
** "The Mysterious Mare-Do-Well" works toward this on more than one level. On one hand, Rainbow Dash is letting her fame and respect get to her head, and the whole MMDW gambit is intended to make her see how a true hero should act. On the other hand, several viewers thought RD's best friends were going simply too far in trying to teach her a lesson, to the point where it was degrading Dash and near enough humiliating her. At least one FixFic has ''them'' realize their jerkass behavior when RD earnestly thanks them for their brutal wakeup-call.
** Happens two ways in the two-part episode "A Canterlot Wedding." In the first episode, Twilight accuses Princess Cadance of being "evil" (admittedly with little to no actual evidence to back her up), to which her accusations were easily dispelled by her brother, Shining Armor. The result leaves her alienated from her brother, friends and mentor, and she tearfully apologizes to Cadance for her accusations. [[spoiler:Then it turns out Cadance really ''is'' evil, albeit an evil imposter named Queen Chrysalis, who is exposed to the rest of the cast by the real Cadance in the second part. As she prepares to take over Canterlot, [[JerkassHasAPoint she smugly tells off the ponies for ignoring Twilight and letting her plan go through]], leading a solemn Applejack to apologize to Twilight on everyone's behalf]].
** "One Bad Apple". Turns out that Babs Seed, Applebloom's visiting cousin, was bullied back home for not having a cutiemark, and only took up bullying the CMC to avoid getting bullied again. The CMC only finds out this ''after'' they've set in motion an elaborate and potentially dangerous scheme to get revenge. Also, when they show Babs around at the start, they [[InnocentlyInsensitive insensitively]] remark on her blank-flank several times, and she's visibly uncomfortable.
* In the ChristmasEpisode of ''WesternAnimation/PinkyAndTheBrain'', throughout their scheme to infilterate Santa's toys with brainwashing dolls, Pinky constantly bugs Brain over his "very important" Christmas letter. When he later realises he forgot to send it and breaks down in tears, Brain finally snaps and snatches away his "stupid letter", ordering him to see to his device. Just seconds from his plan succeeding, Brain reads the letter out of curiosity, discovering it is actually a heartwrenching speech from Pinky about his "best friend in the whole world, the Brain" and how he never gets the respect he deserves, pleading for Santa to give every present intended for Pinky to him (and the world should he have it in that big old bag of his). The letter (and the sight of a heartbroken Pinky still loyally tending to his work) leaves Brain a teary eyed wreck, only able to muster out a Merry Christmas through his control booth before smashing it to pieces.
* In ''EightCrazyNights'' after Whitey tells Elanor about Davey's past when his parents were killed in a car accident one night after he won the basketball tournament, Davey flips out at him and calls him a freak, tells him nobody likes him, and that he will never win the patch of appreciation for his charity, later Davey has an epiphany realizing that he's been a dick to everyone because of his bitterness of towards his parents' deaths and turning to alcohol as a crutch, and Whitey who had taken him in after his trailer was burned down really isn't appreciated by the townspeople who take advantage of his kindness. He goes to the town banquet to apologize for his behavior over the years and calls out the townspeople for their treatment of Whitey and that he had probably treated him worst of all, the townspeople regret the way they treated him and help Davey give Whitey a surprise party and give him the appreciation patch he's always wanted.
* This happens in the animated ''ComicStrip/{{Peanuts}}'' special, ''Charlie Brown's All Stars''. Charlie Brown ends up turning down a sponsor deal that would have allowed his baseball team to become apart of the little league, complete with uniforms. When the team finds this out (on top of Charlie Brown causing them to lose yet another game), they berate him to no end. As they walk away, they continue to complain about how stupid he was to turn down the deal, until Linus had enough and informed them he only turned it down because he would've been forced to kick girls and Snoopy off the team. As if they didn't feel bad enough, Linus and Schroder then decide to give everyone TheReasonYouSuckSpeech. It's probably one of the few times the characters felt genuine remorse for their treatment of Charlie Brown.
* {{FamilyGuy}} episode, '''One If by Clam, Two If by Sea''', when an inmate at a jail was about to stab Joe, [[spoiler: who along with Peter, Quagmire, and Cleveland after being wrongfully of arson but freed thanks to their wives getting [[MoralEventHorizon Nigel, the real arson, who destroyed the Drunken Clam for insurance money]] then executed or it]]. Seeing this, the inmate sits and stabs himself with the knife to know what his victims have felt. Upon, he understands why he is there by saying “God, is that what I been doing to people. I belong here”.
* Parodied and subverted in the ''WesternAnimation/GoofTroop'' episode "Axed by Addition." When PJ [[PlayingSick plays (extremely) sick]], Pete starts to realize that he's been a jerk to him, for some reasons that make sense and others that are [[FelonyMisdemeanor very mundane]]. He sobs confessions to everyone he sees, which creeps most of them out, and then chases PJ all across the city, and eventually catches up to him, holds him, and apologizes... then immediately drops him when the phone rings and starts being a jerk to him again as soon as he finds out PJ wasn't really sick.
* In the ''Arthur'' episode, "So Funny, I Forgot to Laugh," Arthur starts to make fun of Sue Ellen due to her wearing a wooly sweater to school. He constantly makes a bunch of jokes about how Sue Ellen looks like a sheepdog and even draws a picture of Sue Ellen with a sheepdog's body and sticks it to her locker. Arthur finally goes too far when he photoshops a sheepdog's head over a photo of Sue Ellen and emails it to her, and when Sue Ellen sees it, she is reduced to tears. It isn't until Arthur hears that Sue Ellen is thinking about switching classes that he realizes that he was being a bully to her and he finally apologizes.
** There was also the episode "Draw" where Fern gets mad at Francine for calling her a "mouse" and she decides to get back at her by creating a bunch of mean drawings about her and gets all the others to join in. They soon find out that they went too far after they hear Francine telling Mrs. Macgrady about the whole thing and she's done talking, she starts to cry.
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