-->Hello there! I am he: The Man With a Long Chin and I am here to berate (teach) you about the perils of ''Digitiser''. Do you see?

[[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Digitiser Digitiser]] holds the bizarre and unique honour of being one of the few examples of a notable {{Teletext}} service.

Broadcasting mostly during TheNineties, Digitiser - [[FanNickname Digi]] to its friends - occupied a small run of five or six, daily-updated pages on the subject of VideoGames, written initially by two individuals - Tim "Mr Hairs" Moore, and Paul "Mr Biffo" Rose, (latterly Biffo alone, with bylined columnists at weekends) and was started when Rose, merely a graphic designer for Teletext Limited at the time, one day suggested that the service cover games, and the rest is history.

Digitiser was famed for its ability to court controversy, as well as its humour, general English-language-o-butchery, and general awesomeness.

Sadly, none of this went down well with the [[ExecutiveMeddling higher-ups]] at Teletext not being fond of any of it, and after years of trying, managed to force Biffo to bring updates down to thrice weekly and ditch all the humour. It didn't last, and [[HilarityEnsues hilarity ensued]].

A year or so later - after getting a feature profiling the service in ''Edge'' and everything, Mr. Biffo decided to call it a day and concentrate on his screenwriting career, which included ''EastEnders'', ''[[Series/TheSootyShow Sooty]]'', and ''Series/MyParentsAreAliens''. Teletext replaced it with another games service, Gamecentral, but that one was much more straight-laced.

Celebrity fans include Alex Garland, who [[ShoutOut named one chapter]] of ''Literature/TheBeach'' "Messed Up" after the similar Digi-catchphrase, and Ray Park AKA [[StarWars Darth Maul]].

Due to the ephemeral nature of Teletext, much is now lost, but thanks to fans an archive of several issues is available [[http://www.teletext.org.uk/index.php?cat=30_Archived-nbsp~Pages&page=41_Digitiser-nbsp~1995-1998 here]].


* BerserkButton: Stay AWAY from Creator/MrT's BINS.
* CatchPhrase: ...-me-do, Moc-moc-a-moc!, Stay Away From My Bins.
* CannotTellAJoke: The Man's Daddy.
--> Q: What happened when Superman and Batman went on holiday?
--> A: Nothing - Superman stayed at home mourning the death of Batman, who had choked to death on his own eyelids!
* DefiantToTheEnd: After years of ExecutiveMeddling and being ScrewedByTheNetwork, Digitiser finally came to an end in 2003. But what was the very last thing Mr. Biffo left behind for the nation to see? [[{{Catchphrase}} Press]] [[labelnote:reveal]]http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/turner_2736.jpg[[/labelnote]] [[{{Catchphrase}} to find out.]]
* [[EverythingsDeaderWithZombies Everything's Deader With Zombie Dave]]
* ExecutiveMeddling / MoralGuardians: Digi would often fall foul of them, not least due to its surreal humour, which would see sub-editors at Teletext cut out whole pages of reviews and demand changes to the most innocuous of headlines. And one genuine run-in with the broadcast regulator over [[KickTheDog a joke about violence and Gossi The Dog]].
* FourPointScale: Averted. Cue [[SonicTheHedgehog Sonic 3]] [[FanDumb Fan Dumbaplenty]].
* GettingCrapPastTheRadar: Oh So Very Hard. Especially with Zombie Dave.
** And again with pretty much anything, courtesy some extremely paranoid MeddlingExecutives.
* GrandFinale
* LoadsAndLoadsOfCharacters: The Man (with or without his long chin), Fat Sow, Gossi The Dog, Insincere Dave, The Snakes, The Rapping Shoe, Zombie Dave, Chester Fisho, Le Chef Du Pompt Du Pompt, Mr. T, the list goes on. And on.
** Also, A reasonably large rotation of columnists at the weekend.
* SarcasmMode: Insincere Dave.
* SingleIssueWonk
* {{Spammer}}: The name Stuart N. Hardy is instantly recognisable to Digi, ''Magazine/YourSinclair'' or ''Magazine/AmigaPower'' readers - the man was a serial letter writer to any service or mag that promised a prize for the best letter. Notable mainly for being boring '''and''' opinionated.
* SpinOff: Digiworld.TV, an attempt to bring Digi to the web, which lasted about eight weeks.