->''"I love you I hate you I kiss you I rape you\\
and I cheat and deceive but I need you."''
-->-- ''Music/{{Clawfinger}}'', [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gVaH-JCNDDI "I Need You"]]

A romantic and/or sexual relationship that is truly destructive, breaking down at least one of the lovers, probably both. While they may eventually recover, it can also be an emotional counterpart of DefiledForever.

The characters may or may not be aware of how bad their relationship really is, but, in either case, the author is very aware: this severe form of LoveHurts is ''not'' portrayed as amusingly wacky or RomanticizedAbuse, [[SeriousBusiness no]], it is PlayedForDrama as well as NightmareFuel. However, RomanticizedAbuse or TheMasochismTango can morph into this trope through the power of MoodWhiplash or CerebusSyndrome.

If the relationship doesn't contain outright DomesticAbuse, then they are still dragging each other down on an emotional level. This is sometimes done on purpose as a calculated move to make the partner stay. If your partner doesn't have any self-esteem, they'll believe that they don't deserve any better then being with a creep like you. They'll simply fall into DespairEventHorizon and accept the pain. However, please note that the partner does not ''have'' to be malicious or abusive; it depends on how sensitive the other character is.

These relationships can sometimes ''be caused by'' situations such as AMatchMadeInStockholm and messed-up beliefs such as MaritalRapeLicense and SexIsEvilAndIAmHorny. They might ''lead to'' situations such as LoveMakesYouEvil and a DestructoNookie.

If only one of the partners suffers, then that partner is likely a LoveMartyr.

For platonic variants, compare WithFriendsLikeThese.

Compare WomanScorned for when the destructiveness is caused by the termination of the romance rather then the romance itself. Contrast SafeSaneAndConsensual and CasualKink for stuff that might ''look'' like destructive romance without actually being it. See also SexIsEvilAndIAmHorny.


[[folder:Anime & Manga]]
* Karim and Zagi in ''Manga/JyuOhSei''. Their relationship is described at least once as Zagi "ruling" her, and while they have expressed pretty genuine feelings for each other, it's clearly unhealthy.
* ''{{Manga/Loveless}}'' is absolutely full of this, with almost every relationship (romantic or otherwise) being faintly dysfunctional. The most blatant example is probably [[BrokenBird Soubi]]'s utter devotion to Seimei, who doesn't care about him in the least and is both verbally and physically abusive. Despite the fact Seimei doesn't love Soubi, Soubi will still do anything he says.
* ''Anime/NeonGenesisEvangelion'': The relationship between [[InferioritySuperiorityComplex Asuka]] and [[ExtremeDoormat Shinji]] quite literally causes [[spoiler: TheEndOfTheWorldAsWeKnowIt]]. Despite their mutual attraction, she's too much of a {{Tsundere}} and he's too much of a ShrinkingViolet for them to truly understand each other, much less be open with each other about their feelings. Their failed attempts at doing so throughout the series is one of the biggest causes of {{Angst}} for both of them. This finally comes to a head during TheMovie, after [[spoiler: Rei blows off Gendou and leaves the ultimate outcome of the Human Instrumentality Project in Shinji's hands. Shinji and Asuka are two of the first to be absorbed by the LCL, and when their souls meet together it's essentially the first time in the series that they're open about their feelings with each other. Only by this point, Asuka is so angry and disgusted with him (assuming it was not a {{Flashback}}, the infamous masturbation scene was probably the last straw for her) that she rejects him, which causes him to jump at her and choke her. However, Shinji does reject Instrumentality at the last minute, and in the last scene it is implied that they may or may not be getting over their issues and reaching out to each other.]]
* An interpretation of Chiaki and [[{{Yandere}} Hatori's]] relationship in ''Manga/SekaiIchiHatsukoi''. While it's obvious they're an {{Official Couple}} from the two openings from the anime, their relationship in series doesn't seem to work. What could have been a {{Childhood Friend Romance}} ended up becoming this due to how different the two are in work ethics and personality. (Chiaki is a [[ManChild childish]], [[LazyBum lazy]] person despite being one of the top manga authors in Japan while Hatori is [[TheStoic serious]], [[MarriedtotheJob hard working]] and has to force Chiaki to do almost everything.) It gets to the point that neither can live without the [[LivingEmotionalCrutch other supporting them.]] This has shown to backfire though as once they do get together [[spoiler: after Hatori brutally [[RapeAsDrama rapes]] Chiaki, mind you, and it's not [[BreaktheCutie played for fanservice or laughs]]]], the episodes after that show them fighting more than making love to each other to the point where it seems like both of them can't seem to trust each other to not cheat on them and snap whenever one accuses the other of cheating. And even though they recoil at the end of the episode, it ends up being repeated in the next episode simply because the only reason they're in a relationship to begin with is the fact they can't function without the other. And of course, both drag in Chiaki's friend [[UnluckyChildhoodFriend Yanase]] into the picture who always ends up suffering from their arguments and disagreements [[spoiler: physically and emotionally.]]
* This trope is extremely common in YaoiGenre manga in general; the main couples in ''Manga/MaidenRose'' and ''Manga/SakuraGari'' are good examples, as are [[{{Manga/Loveless}} Soubi and Seimei]] above. To a lesser extent, it's also present in YuriGenre manga (mostly older works such as ''Manga/OniisamaE''). Makes sense when you consider the {{Melodrama}}-driven nature of most YaoiGenre and much YuriGenre.
* Very much so in ''Manga/FutureDiary'' between Yuno and Yuki. The best example is probably when [[spoiler: Yuno drugs Yuki, takes him to an abandoned hotel and keeps him chained down in a basement so that the 'happy end' her diary predicts can't be interfered with. Then, when Yuki's friends finally track him down, she traps them and then tries to gas them to death.]] Thankfully, their relationship get sorted out by the end of the series. It's brought up that the relationship is also abusive on Yuki's part, although he's nowhere near as bad as Yuno. He admits to only using her in order to survive the game and move ahead, and is just exploiting her devotion for his own needs. Yuno later acknowledges that she understands this, and is content with him using her so long as they can pretend to have a real relationship. Though later in the game, Yuki does come to genuinely care for her and stops using her.
* ''Manga/GoodnightPunpun'' has the eponymous protagonist and his love interest, Aiko. The only thing uniting the two is an unhealthy obsession, and the fact that they're two damaged, broken people. They keep hurting each other more and more, and the realization that their romance has no real foundation and is fundamentally destroying them both may be a big reason why [[spoiler: Aiko eventually killed herself]].
* ''Anime/RevolutionaryGirlUtena'' has a lot of creepy, unhealthy relationships, but the one that best fits this trope is [[spoiler:Anthy and Akio/Dios - she used to love him as a brother, but after she sacrificed herself for him he became bitter and selfish and trapped her in a non-consensual, incestuous relationship she was too afraid to escape from.]] Touga also uses 'joking' romantic behaviour to manipulate and control his younger sister Nanami, but they're not actually in a relationship.
* ''LightNovel/MirageOfBlaze'': Kagetora and Naoe's relationship when Naoe starts proving himself to be a {{Yandere}}, tries to rape Kagetora, and MurderTheHypotenuse.
* ''Manga/TokyoBabylon'', and its sequel-of-sorts ''Manga/{{X1999}}'', has Subaru Sumeragi and Seishirou Sakurazuka. Subaru is the epitome of morality and empathy, Seishirou is [[spoiler:a cold, sociopathic assassin. Under the disguise of a nice vet,]] Seishirou manages to get Subaru to fall for him but he proclaims to feel nothing for him, breaking Subaru's heart at the same time he [[spoiler:tries to kill him. When he fails to kill the boy, Subaru's sister gives herself to Seishirou in order for him to spare her brother's life,]] in that way managing to gain Subaru's hate. But then X[=/=]1999 reveals that Subaru, despite all that happened, ''[[DevotedToYou still loves Seishirou]]'' and wishes to [[spoiler:die by his hands;]] Seishirou, on the other hand, pretty much [[spoiler:commits suicide by tricking Subaru into killing ''him'', because he realizes he does actually loves Subaru.]] [[TheUnreveal Or so we assume]].

[[folder:Comic Books]]
* In ''ComicBook/BitchyButch'', one of the main sources of the protagonist's permanent foul mood is that she got her heart broken by her first serious girlfriend. First the girlfriend was unfaithful, sleeping with another woman without asking for an open relationship first. When discovered, she declares an open relationship retroactively, and Butchy accepts it on a theoretical level. On a emotional level, she obviously never got over it.
* In ''ComicBook/{{Fables}}'', the relationship between Jack and Rose Red has more then a hint of this even from the start, with Rose Red eventually realizing that they only brought out the worst in each other. When she later reconnects with him, it's out of pure self-hatred. Their new relationship drags her down even further.
* In ''[[ComicBook/WhateverLoveMeans The Feeling Prince Charles Had]]'', love ''[[LoveHurts itself]]'' is portrayed as a destructive force that is bound to break people down emotionally.
* The comic series ''Flinch'' once featured a short story titled "Red Romance" (illustrated by Creator/BruceTimm, of all people) where a man and a woman, both sociopathic lowlifes, fall in love and begin a relationship that involves sickening amounts of Masochistic Tangoing, until even this violence isn't enough to satisfy their desires. It leads to the jaded man hiring a specialist to torture and kill her while he watches, only to discover she hired the specialist for the exact same reason. The story ends with the couple in orgasmic ecstasy as they watch one another get horribly brutalized, before finally killing them and leaving them in each other's arms on the bloodstained bed. A story that manages to be touchingly romantic AND incredibly disturbing at the same time.
* In ''ComicBook/{{Lucifer}}'', Lady Lys' spirit gets permanently broken by her mortal lover Cristopher Rudd. And you thought a romance between a demon and a human would be bad for the ''human''?
* Roy Harper and Cheshire's relationship in ''ComicBook/TeenTitans'' and other related series is this, on the part of the former. No one can understand as to how Roy could possibly have any sort of feeling of love towards Cheshire, who is a PsychoForHire genocidal maniac and the mother of his daughter, Lian. Although there is the fact that most of it stems from him not wanting Lian to see her mother be caged like an animal. In the first ''Titans'' series Roy's conflicting feelings towards Cheshire were causing problems with his relationship with Donna Troy, which Donna eventually ended. Not long after Roy finally came to terms with the fact that Cheshire would always be a heartless murderer and eventually put his feelings to rest after she was convicted. That hasn't stopped Cheshire from multiple attempts at exploiting their past relationship to manipulate Roy for her own ends. The ''Villains United'' miniseries leads strength to the argument that Cheshire is incapable of love unless it's a means for her goals.
* [[{{Yandere}} The Morrigan]] and [[YourCheatingHeart Baphomet]] in ''Comicbook/TheWickedAndTheDivine'' are well on their way. [[spoiler:Persephone]] also breaks up with Baal to prevent this from happening to them.

[[folder:Fan Works]]
* Erin and Umbra from ''Fanfic/AndTheStoryContinues'' are caught in between this trope and WithFriendsLikeThese. One is an increasingly traumatized AllLovingHero in the midst of an existential crisis. The other is an insane, amoral and clingy shinigami for whom the one feels responsible, [[spoiler:being the unholy reincarnation of her friend and ImpliedLoveInterest L, with whom she'd already had [[AMatchMadeInStockholm a plenty troubled relationship]] before [[HeroicSuicide his death]]]]. Although he doesn't mean to, Umbra acts as a tormentor for her, and more than one of their interactions can be construed as emotional abuse or manipulation. Not to mention his possessiveness, which [[spoiler:unlike his previous incarnation]] he makes no attempt to hide--Umbra outright admits he doesn't like [[NiceGuy Stephen]] getting close to her and proceeds to bully and humiliate him from the outset to drive him away out of sheer jealousy.
* L and Light from ''Fanfic/ThoseWhoStandForNothingFallForAnything''. They've been having a secret off-and-on affair for years, one that is rife with every form of mutual DomesticAbuse you can imagine: physical, emotional, even sexual. Even when they try to break away from each other, neither can stay away for long.

* ''Film/BadTiming'': The film charts the emotional, spiritual, and physical ups and downs of a young couple's relationship that is fueled by their compulsion to attack, manipulate, and humiliate one another.
* ''Film/{{Gilda}}'' is all about the love-hate relationship between Johnny and Gilda. The entire plot revolves around the psychological, emotional and physical abuse they inflict on one another, which gets increasingly nasty and violent and bizarre, to the point where both of them are practically mentally unhinged by the end of the film.
* ''Film/{{Thirst}}'': You have a vampire priest struggling to keep his humanity and ethics and a woman who can't wait to indulge in the powers and menus of vampirism.
* ''Film/TheWarOfTheRoses'' walks the line between hilarious and genuinely scary. The film follows the courtship and marriage of a nice-but-shallow couple, followed by the most un-amicable divorce imaginable.
* ''Film/TheDarjeelingLimited'': A defining feature of Jack Whitman is his propensity to enter these kinds of relationships, first with his girlfriend (played by a short Natalie Portman cameo) and later with Sweet Lime. This seems to be a motif of ''Creator/WesAnderson''.
* ''Film/{{Fallen Angel|1945}}'' has Stella and Eric, who are trying to get married, but it's more of an unhealthy obsession, than love. [[spoiler: And then Stella is murdered...]]
* ''Film/StarWars'': As sweet as it can be at times, Anakin and Padme's relationship wasn't healthy. When you have two people trained from a ''very'' young age to live a life of nothing but duty, and essentially forbid them normal, healthy relationships, there's no way it can end in anything but this trope. It's especially bad for Anakin because this prohibition is one of the seeds that would lead him to TheDarkSide.
* ''Film/RubySparks'': Calvin is a self-centered writer who creates the character Ruby, who is written to be his ideal ManicPixieDreamGirl. Then [[PygmalionPlot Ruby comes to life]]. The difference between Ruby-the-fictional-character and Ruby-the-real-person, however, is that Ruby-the-real-person wants a life outside of Calvin, which Calvin doesn't want. Not to mention, while Ruby is written to be perfect for Calvin, Calvin is ''not'' perfect for Ruby, and is rather controlling. And then he realizes anything he writes happens to Ruby, meaning he can basically control her every move if he wants to. Cue things going steadily downhill. [[spoiler:In the end, he sets her free, realizing that Ruby is truly her own person, and deserves to be treated as such.]]
* In ''Film/ClashByNight'', Mae is married to Jerry but has an affair with Earl, Jerry's best friend. It's an ugly relationship that breaks Jerry and Mae's heart.
* In ''Film/IShotJesseJames'', the relationship between Cynthy Waters and Robert Ford is largely based on Cynthy's fear of Robert after he kills UsefulNotes/JesseJames. Her fear that he'll hurt her in some way makes her grow more distant, until she [[spoiler: dumps Robert for [[TheRival his rival]] John Kelley]].

* The novel ''Literature/TheStoryOfO'' exists in two versions. These versions have very different endings, casting the rest of the story in very different lights. In the most popular version, which most adaptations are built on, the relationship is simply CasualKink and PropertyOfLove. The other version is a DestructiveRomance presented as RomanticizedAbuse during most of the book [[MoodWhiplash but then abruptly changes tone]] at the end. [[spoiler:It ends with the protagonist and her boyfriend agreeing that she should commit suicide... and she does]].
* ''Literature/TheEnglishPatient''. Everyone singing its praises as one of the great romantic stories of its time has missed that Katharine cheating on her husband with Almasy is portrayed as a highly destructive obsession that ends in the pointless deaths of all three.
* ''Film/{{Gone With the Wind}}'' features Rhett and Scarlett's marriage starting okay, but due to Scarlett's obsession with Ashley Wilkes taking prevalence over Rhett and her family, the marriage becomes destructive.
* Catherine and Heathcliff in ''Literature/WutheringHeights''.
* In Francine Riversí ''Literature/TheMarkOfTheLion'' trilogy, [[spoiler:Julia]] goes through at least two of these: the first man she falls in love with turns out to be brutally abusive; the second [[spoiler:gives her a baby she really doesn't want and the STD that eventually kills her, before abandoning her and]] leaving her [[BreakTheCutie totally disillusioned]]. The various affairs she had in between certainly didnít help her slide towards total cynicism or [[spoiler:excruciating death by syphilis]].
* Helen and Huntingdon's marriage in ''Literature/TheTenantOfWildfellHall''. Huntingdon associates love with complete submission and compliance, Helen associates love with trying to improve her husband's faults. At first this only causes a few spats, but later Huntingdon starts going out of the way to be horrible just to spite Helen and Helen stops giving him any affection and encouragement at all. It's more Huntingdon's fault than Helen's, but after a few years their marriage crumbles completely.
* Ted's and Rose's marriage in ''Literature/TheJoyLuckClub.'' Their marriage is built more on rebelling against their parents and cultural norms and Rose grows to realize that Ted relies on her passive and submissive nature to blame her for his emotional insecurities.
* Norwegian novel ''Literature/NothingGrowsOfMoonshine'' is built around this trope, with a nameless teenage girl (the narrator), being physically and emotionally abused by the one man she gave her heart to in good faith. Not that the man in question [[SexIsEvilAndIAmHorny always acts rationally]]. The trope is almost mentioned verbatim, and the girl ends up as a BrokenBird DefiledForever.

[[folder:Live-Action TV]]
* ''Series/LawAndOrderSpecialVictimsUnit'' has portrayed many of these over the years. In one episode, Olivia tries in vain to convince a woman to report her husband for DomesticAbuse. Of course she refuses to betray her beloved like that [[spoiler:and eventually ends up dying in Olivia's arms, stabbed to death by her husband]].
* In the ''Series/NorthAndSouthUS'' miniseries, Madeleine is married off to the villain Justin--who gradually breaks her down over the years, eventually turning her into a drugged down empty shell of a human being. It lasts [[LoveRedeems until the hero saves her with his love]].
* On ''Series/{{Glee}}'', Terri spells out to Will that the only reason their marriage works is because it's one of these. Will, actually wanting to be in a healthy relationship, leaves.
* Monroe and Angelina's relationship is presented as this on ''Series/{{Grimm}}''. Though it is clear that the two characters care deeply about each other, by the end of the episode, it is made clear that the relationship simply would not be good for Monroe. This is mostly due to Monroe having been through MonstersAnonymous program and consequently trying to stay clean and live a normal life, but being around Angelina causes him to lose control and go back to his old ways.
* ''Series/BuffyTheVampireSlayer''. Spike's interest in Buffy started as StalkerWithACrush, but she regarded his advances with contempt. But after Buffy falls into depression in Season 6 she secretly starts sleeping with him. Unfortunately this only ends up making things worse--Spike is convinced Buffy wants to come over to TheDarkSide and is frustrated by her unwillingness to either return his love or abandon her friends, while their InterplayOfSexAndViolence, her [[FoeYay lust for a soulless monster who's supposed to be her enemy]] and her [[WhatMeasureIsANonHuman guilt over using Spike without respecting his own feelings]] only increase Buffy's self-loathing. At one point she savagely beats an unresisting Spike, describing him in terms that are clearly referring to herself ("There is nothing good or clean in you! You are ''dead'' inside! You can't feel anything real!"). The InUniverse ValuesDissonance between the two reaches a point where [[spoiler:after she ends the relationship, Spike tries to rape an injured Buffy; fortunately Buffy is able to fend him off and Spike realises that, even for him, this act is crossing the MoralEventHorizon, and motivates him to go on a quest to regain his soul.]]
* In ''Series/{{Moonlight}}'', Josef describes Mick's relationship with his sire/ex-girlfriend Coraline as this to Mick's current love interest, Beth.
-->'''Josef:''' You have to understand, Mick and Coraline's relationship was one of those terrifying, completely self-destructive freakshows that you spend your whole life searching for knowing it can only end in one or both of you dead.
-->'''Beth:''' That's your idea of love?
-->'''Josef:''' What can I tell you, I'm a romantic.
* [[TheWoobie Niles]] and [[TheGhost Maris's]] marriage in ''Series/{{Frasier}}'' was depicted as this, only being stable when Niles was miserable and cowed and Maris was wrapped up in her own pursuits, and erupting into vicious fights, break-ups, and various forms of abuse (on Maris's part) whenever this status quo was shaken up. It was hinted that the main reason that it lasted as long as it did (and the amount of backsliding that occurred during their drawn-out breakup) was because of Niles's insecurity and codependency and Maris's enjoyment of having someone to control.
* All the romantic relationships on ''Series/TheVampireDiaries'' have a destructive element to them, but the one that qualifies the most is Damon and Elena. Damon is quite abusive towards Elena.
* Sylar and Elle on ''Series/{{Heroes}}'' qualifies, as she's a sociopathic Company assassin broken by years of Company experimentation on her powers and he's a psychotic serial killer with serious mental issues. They both try to reform for the better, but when the Company lies she's told surface, including how she manipulated his feelings, Sylar kills her.
* ''Series/{{Elementary}}'' reveals that Sherlock and [[spoiler:Jamie Moriarty]] had one. [[spoiler:She's the abuser in this case, as she invented an entire identity whole-cloth in order to study and break him]]. And ''succeeded'', because it drove him into a drug-fueled downward spiral and a stint in rehab, which kicks off the series. The show also does not shy away from showing that, even from [[spoiler:prison, Jamie is still exerting her abusive influence over him by writing him letters]].
* ''Series/{{Supernatural}}'': Despite being brothers who don't have [[SiblingIncest that kind of relationship]], Sam and Dean probably fall more under this trope than WithFriendsLikeThese simply because their relationship is so close that it functions more like they really ''are'' a [[LikeAnOldMarriedCouple couple]] than like a normal sibling relationship. It is blatantly obvious that Dean and Sam have a [[DesperatelyCravesAffection very]] [[LoveMakesYouCrazy messed-up]], [[LoveMartyr tangled]], [[LivingEmotionalCrutch codependent]], [[ExtremeDoormat unhealthy]] [[PromotionToParent relationship]]. The two simply cannot live or function without each other--which ''really'' isn't a good thing, considering what they've gone through and what they have done to keep each other alive, especially Dean in regards to Sam. Dean's one and only serious girlfriend straight-up acknowledged that she knew she would always be second place to Sam. Their codependency has ''literally'' gotten them both killed, as well as several other people around them and nearly ended the world ''multiple times''.
* Guy of Gisborne and Marian had one of these in ''Series/RobinHood'', born out of the fact that she was a spy for Robin Hood, and he genuinely fell in love with her (thinking that her attention toward him was real). It ends with him [[spoiler:stabbing her to death]] when he finds out the truth.
* Alex and Piper's relationship on ''Series/OrangeIsTheNewBlack'' is described as "[[GirlOnGirlIsHot epic]] if psychotic".
* Beecher and Keller on ''Series/{{Oz}}''. Keller is in love with Beecher to the point where he [[NotGoodWithRejection kills himself and makes it look like Beecher murdered him when Beecher rejects him]]. Keller was also obsessed with remaining in Beecher's life despite Beecher shutting him out numerous times.
* ''Series/{{Hannibal}}'' plays with this with [[MindGameShip Hannibal and Will Graham's]] relationship. [[spoiler: By the latter half of Season 3 their relationship is arguably less destructive towards each other, and moreso towards the people around them.]]
* ''Series/{{Degrassi}}'' has Miles and Esme in season 15. Pre-relationship, he already had a lot of trust issues and mental health problems that stemmed from his abusive father. Then he met Esme and they became friends-with-benefits and he got even worse. She seems to be just as messed up and in an attempt to help him got him hooked on pills. Together they isolated themselves from everyone else and encouraged each other in their destructive behaviour. When he decided to get clean and become friends with his former boyfriend/best friend again, she faked a suicide attempt to get his attention, scared of being alone.
* ''Series/Daredevil2015'':
** Matt Murdock and Elektra Natchios. When they dated in college, Matt nearly ruined his future because of how much of a bad influence Elektra was on him. When she comes back into his life on Stick's orders to bring him into Stick's war against the Hand, his career and budding relationship with Karen Page are shattered as a direct result. And it's a two way street: Matt's ''positive'' influence has a ''negative'' effect on Elektra; she struggles with self-loathing because Matt's restraint makes her feel like a monster, her strive to be better because of him causes her to reject her teachings and puts her in the crosshairs of the Chaste (who, by virtue of her being the Black Sky, consider her too dangerous to leave as a WildCard), and ultimately [[spoiler:results in her death and resurrection by the Hand when she chooses to side with him against them.]]
** Wilson Fisk and Vanessa Marianna, at least from the eyes of Fisk's allies. Leland Owlsley and Madame Gao think that Vanessa is a bad influence on Fisk and is causing him to be a bit too soft and distracted from business at hand, and even make an attempt to kill Vanessa in an attempt to get Fisk to focus more on the criminal enterprise.
* ''Series/GameOfThrones'' has the incestuous relationship between Queen Cersei and Ser Jaime Lannister and their love resulted to a SuccessionCrisis which led to the War of the Five Kings. Unlike in the books where Jaime slowly realized how his relationship with his sister had a negative effect on his life and began to drift away from her, Jaime still remains committed to Cersei despite recognizing her flaws and vows that he would kill anyone who isn't them. [[spoiler:However in the Season 6 finale when Cersei killed her enemies with wildfire (the same wildfire that Aerys II the Mad King wanted to use) which also led to their youngest son's suicide, Jaime was horrified and looked displeased when he watched her sitting on the Iron Throne]].
** At the end of Season 7, [[spoiler:Jaime, upon seeing that Cersei has no intention of helping out in the fight against the Army of the Dead, finally has enough and leaves her to join the Stark-Targaryen alliance]].

* Music/MarilynManson has two entire albums based on this: ''Eat Me, Drink Me'' and ''The High End of Low''. Both were written during Manson's relationship with actress Evan Rachel-Wood. ''EMDM'' starts okay and starts to spiral out of control (which is exactly how things were going in their relationship) and ''The High End of Low'', which was written in order, starts with Manson begging her to let him love her in the song "Devour" and slowly turns from desperate love to hate, to homicidal hate (not hyperbole, he said in an interview that if he hadn't made the album, they both would be dead), to moving on and acceptance. With a few tangents against both America and himself (''Arma-goddamn-motherfuckin-geddon'' being a parody of the album ''Music/AntiChristSuperstar'', and ''We're From America'' being as critical as you'd expect).
* Music/{{Blutengel}} has several songs on this theme, often from the point of view of a former BastardBoyfriend who realizes how horrible he has been.
* Music/{{Clawfinger}} milks this trope in songs such as "I Need You" (see page quote) and "Love Is Just A Four Letter Word".
* Music/{{Eminem}} and Music/{{Rihanna}}'s hit "Love the Way You Lie".
** By the same token, every one of Eminem's songs about his wife Kim Mathers.
* Days of the New's "Touch Peel and Stand" is a disturbing example:
-->''Yes, I've finally found a reason''
-->''I don't need an excuse''
-->''I got this time on my hands''
-->''You are the one to abuse''
* "The Alpha Couple" from Music/TheMountainGoats is this all over. Even their inevitable, final reconciliation has threatening undertones:
-->''Oh sing, sing, sing, for the dying of the day.\\
Sing for the flames that will rip through here\\
And the smoke that will carry us away\\
Yeah, sing for the damage we've done\\
And the worse things that we'll do\\
Open your mouth up and sing for me now\\
And I will sing for you.''
** Their song "No Children" is also probably about this, though it could also be interpreted as a marriage that simply lost its passion.
-->''I hope that our few remaining friends give up on trying to save us.\\
I hope we come up with a fail-safe plot to piss off the dumb few that forgave us.\\
I hope the fences we mended fall down beneath their own weight.\\
And I hope we hold on past the last exit,\\
I hope it's already too late.\\
And I hope the junkyard a few blocks from here\\
Someday burns down.\\
And I hope that the rising black smoke carries me far away\\
And I never come back to this town again\\
In my life.\\
I hope I lie,\\
And tell everyone you were a good wife.\\
And I hope you die.\\
I hope we both die.''
* The [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin self-explanatory]] "(I Hate) Everything About You" by Music/ThreeDaysGrace.
* The lyrics of Music/SaraBareilles' "Gravity" may count as a mild version of this trope, as the song appears to be about a genuine but not-terribly-healthy passionate relationship.
* "Go to the Mattress" by Get Set Go features a couple who are just ''terrible'' together.
-->''I'm a lecher, she's a cheater\\
I'll let her cut me, she likes to let me beat her\\
I'm a fucker, she's a screamer\\
I may be tougher, but she's definitely meaner.''
* Music/FionaApple's "Werewolf" could be the theme song of this trope:
-->''I could liken you to a werewolf, the way you left me for dead\\
But I admit that I provided a full moon\\
And I could liken you to a shark, the way you bit off my head\\
But then again, I was waving around a bleeding open wound\\
But you were such a super guy, 'til the second you get a whiff of me\\
We're like a wishing well and a bolt of electricity\\
But we can still support each other, all we gotta do is avoid each other\\
Nothing wrong when a song ends in a minor key...''
* Music/PinkFloyd's "Don't Leave Me Now", from ''Music/TheWall'':
-->''Ooooh, babe\\
Don't leave me now.\\
Don't say it's the end of the road\\
Remember the flowers I sent\\
I need you, babe\\
To put through the shredder\\
In front of my friends\\
Ooooh, babe\\
Don't leave me now.\\
How could you go?\\
When you know how I need you\\
To beat to a pulp on a Saturday night\\
Ooooh, babe\\
How could you treat me this way?\\
Running away\\
I need you, babe, why are you running away?\\
Oooooh, babe!''
* Music/{{Maroon 5}}'s "One More Night" is about a guy that keeps arguing with his significant other, but he can't leave her due to her excellent love-making in bed. He regrets doing it, but he keeps coming back for more, thus being unable to break out of the abusive relationship.
* Music/MirandaLambert's "Bring Me Down".
* Music/KellyClarkson's "My Life Would Suck Without You", especially since it's about an off and on relationship.
-->''Being with you is so dysfunctional''\\
''I really shouldn't miss you''\\
''But I can't let you go''
* Music/PoetsOfTheFall's "[[https://youtu.be/DwmNefMrVB0?list=PLjACqN5i5sDUEienDV52g85W6J7chzLXV Kamikaze Love]]" has a pair reveling in their illicit, volatile and presumably doomed romance.
-->Take me where the angels fall\\
You take it all\\
You give no quarter for my love\\
You raise me high to tear me down\\
Leaves you reeling, feels like stealing\\
Frantic moments of kamikaze love
* Music/SufjanStevens:
** "Drawn to the Blood", about Domestic Abuse.
-->''The strength of his arm, my lover caught me off-guard.''
** "The Owl and the Tanager", about a secret, emotionally painful relationship (also involving some violence).
-->''I'm bleeding in spite of my love for you, it bruised and bruised my will''.
** "All of Me Wants All of You", about a relationship that's lost all passion and intimacy.
-->''I'm just a ghost you walk right through''.
* Music/FlorenceAndTheMachine's "Kiss With a Fist" is either this or RomanticizedAbuse:
-->You hit me once\\
I hit you back\\
You gave a kick\\
I gave a slap\\
You smashed a plate over my head\\
Then I set fire to our bed
* [[https://g.co/kgs/TtyH2B Ga1ahad and Scientific Witchery]] by Mili tells the story of a pair of doomed lovers who do their best to kill each other.
--> ''The magical potion of reanimation\\
Rise from bed my darling\\
So I can see you again\\
So I can kill you again''\\


[[folder:Mythology and Religion]]
* Hawaiian mythology gives us Kamapua'a, a [[TricksterArchetype trickster]] demigod, and Pele, the goddess of fire. Their fighting almost destroyed both of them.
* In Myth/ClassicalMythology, Aphrodite's marriage to Hephaestus and her subsequent affair with Ares got all three of them humiliated and punished in different ways.

* All relationships between other vampires are assumed to be this by default in ''TabletopGame/VampireTheRequiem''. [[CrapsackWorld It's]] [[VampiresAreSexGods not]] [[DeadlyDecadentCourt surprising]].
** Best example: [[MeaningfulName the Honeymoon Hijackers]], Charles and Charlene Greengrass. They were kidnapped and turned into vampires on their respective wedding nights by cruel sires, with their spouses killed. Charles and Charlene meet one another ten years after their abductions, instantly recognize the predicament of the other, and fall in love. They [[YourSoulIsMine diablerize]] their sires, escape vampire society, get into a scary codependent relationship, [[LoveMakesYouEvil then perform]] {{netorare}} [[LoveMakesYouEvil scenarios and serial killings on any recently-married couple they can find]][[note]]Diablerie causes vampires to sometimes pick up traits of the soul they ate. It's implied that that's why the couple do what they do, despite their actions mirroring their own tragic histories[[/note]].
-->''Mess with their heads. Get it so the victims love their keepers, will do anything for them (even better if they can work one of the couple against the other--[[LampshadeHanging so sweet, that betrayal]]).''
--->'''Night Horrors: Immortal Sinners, pg. 74'''
** Coming full circle, Charlene cheats on Charles. He doesn't know, but she wants him to.

* ''Theatre/RomeoAndJuliet'': It wasn't really their fault, but the situation ended [[{{Understatement}} pretty badly]] nonetheless.
* Norma and Joe's relationship in ''Film/SunsetBoulevard'': and ''oh'', what a dysfunctional one it is, with Norma's outbursts and Joe's passive aggressive BS. Close to the end, it turns out that [[spoiler:Norma's relationship with her butler is even worse.]]
* Eddie and May in Sam Shepard's play ''Fool for Love''. For over a decade their relationship's been a nonstop violent power struggle consisting of one trying to run away from the other only for the two to come back together time and again. For extra {{Squick}}, [[spoiler:they also happen to be [[BrotherSisterIncest half-siblings]]...and even after finding this out they still kept seeing each other. They're also mirroring the dysfunctional dynamic their father had with each of their mothers]].
* J.D. and Veronica in ''{{Theatre/Heathers}}'' are a hot mess. Veronica knows it. J.D. doesn't. They're only seventeen, and start dating barely twelve hours after they first meet (when J.D. beats up two guys Veronica hates, which gets her ''[[InLoveWithYourCarnage very]]'' interested...), and the relationship becomes very serious and intense very quickly. When J.D. finds out an AlphaBitch is giving Veronica trouble, he decides to solve the problem by murdering her. Then, when two {{Jerk Jock}}s spread hurtful rumors about her, he kills ''them'', and [[ManipulativeBastard manipulates Veronica into helping]]. Despite this, Veronica stays with him, pleading with him to stop the killings, and he listens -- for maybe a week. Finally, Veronica decides enough is enough and dumps him, but he still remains madly in love with her, and she clearly still has some affection for him in spite of herself. [[spoiler:In the end, J.D. blows himself up to save her, and his last action before being blown sky-high is to simply reaching out for her, and she reaches back...]] ''Jeez''.
* Tom and Sara in ''Theatre/MurderBallad'' -- [[spoiler:their affair is what causes the titular murder and is implied to ruin a marriage.]]

* ''Webcomic/{{Homestuck}}'': Troll Romance includes a quadrant based on mutual hatred (the caliginous quadrant, known as kismesissitude and symbolized by a "♠") to the point where one would at least try to kill the partner. [[spoiler:Gamzee and Terezi]] get together under one, which demonstrates how unhealthy it can be if the pairing isn't right. After one year of the relationship, [[spoiler:Terezi]]'s had her self-confidence shattered and admits that, while she hates [[spoiler:Gamzee]], being with him makes her hate herself even more. She compares him to a drug, and notes that she now takes every insult personally, but she can't leave because she's drawn to the wretchedness and she's disgusted by her dependence. [[spoiler:This was part of the reason that she had her eyes fixed, but having her blindness, which was a proud part of her self-image, cured devastated her]]. When Karkat tells her [[spoiler:Gamzee]] will likely end it, she breaks down crying and says that if he throws her away, she really will be pathetic.
** It's heavily implied if not outright stated that this pairing is too vitriolic and abusive (including {{Gaslighting}} and outright physical abuse) to be a healthy kismesissitude, in comparison to other caliginous ships like Vriska♠Eridan or Jack Noir♠Black Queen. We see the latter at one point, and it turns out that they hate each other just the right amount (in every universe; Spades Slick and Snowman had a thing as well) to have an actually healthy kismesissitude. Doc Scratch is not amused when they start hate-kissing in front of him.
* All of Romeo's romances in the Literature/WhateleyUniverse. He's an incredibly handsome mutant and a member of the Bad Seeds (at least one parents must be a supervillain to be admitted). He picks dowdy girls who feel unattractive and tries to turn the ugly duckling into a swan. No matter how successful he is, he always creates someone who doesn't feel attractive enough compared to ''him'' and so they mistreat him and then break up with him.
* In ''WebOriginal/YouCouldMakeALife'', Nikita broke up with Luke while they were teenagers in such a callous manner that Luke never emotionally recovered from it. Their ensuing on-and-off relationship of hatesex and brutal beatdowns for the next seven years only serve to drag the embittered Luke down even further.
* In ''Literature/{{Twig}}'', Sylvester confesses to Lillian that his fear of engaging in one of these is why he hasn't acted on his and Mary's mutual attraction. Mary, a LaserGuidedTykeBomb who has been [[DefusingTheTykeBomb defused]] by ThePowerOfFriendship, is both deadly and emotionally vulnerable enough to push Sy's ManipulativeBastard button so that he starts pushing her by instinct, while she in turn eggs him on, which Sy fears could culminate in them making each other into the worst possible versions of themselves.

* ''WesternAnimation/SouthPark'' gives up [[AscendedExtra Heidi Turner]] and [[FatBastard Eric Cartman]], which started out [[SickeningSweethearts very sweet and loving]] in Season 20, before it devolved into this in Season 21. Eric Cartman becomes miserable in his relationship with Heidi but doesn't want to end it because of his [[AttentionWhore constant need for attention]] and is emotionally manipulating her into staying with him. Likewise the only reason Heidi is still with him is because [[HonorBeforeReason she doesn't want to admit to her friends she made a bad decision,]] even if [[TheCorrupter his influence]] turns her into his DistaffCounterpart. The relationship has also affected other people as well, especially Kyle who was upset that he wasn't able to convince Heidi to leave Cartman blaming Canada for this,[[spoiler: which resulted in him getting the country nuked.]] Eventually [[HeelRealization Heidi realizes]] how much of a negative impact her relationship with Cartman had and how they only [[PlayingTheVictimCard saw themselves as the victim of other spouses emotional abuse]] and decides to end the relationship herself, not letting Cartman's emotional manipulation affect her anymore.
* In ''WesternAnimation/StevenUniverse'', the [[FusionDance fusion]] Malachite is a prime example of an abusive relationship. In the episode "Jailbreak", Lapis Lazuli fused with Jasper after the latter persuaded her to, but then dragged them both under the ocean, forcing Jasper to stay fused with her for months. This took a heavy psychological toll on them both. In the later episode "Alone at Sea", Lapis admits that she was abusive towards Jasper, even while in the fusion ("I ''liked'' taking everything out on you [Jasper]. I needed you, I-I hated you! It was bad!"). However, Jasper seems to be too attached to the relationship they had, ''begging'' Lapis to become Malachite with her again. Lapis declines, saying that "what we had wasn't healthy", and that she never wants to feel like she did with Jasper again.