[[quoteright:306:[[Franchise/StarWars http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/starwars-xmas.jpg]]]]
[[caption-width-right:306:WARNING: [[SchmuckBait Never, ever]] listen to this.]]

->''"All of a sudden there comes Christmas, and there is an absolute tidal wave of darling little girls and sweet little boys making millions of dollars on records singing enchanting little Christmas songs that are perfectly nauseating."''
-->-- '''Creator/AnnaRussell'''

In the days when sales of vinyl singles really ''did'' control the position of songs in the charts, Christmas was the time when {{glurge}}-laden songs topped the charts for weeks as children bought them for grandparents (and grandparents for grandchildren). Ubiquitous in stores, malls, and practically every other place with a PA system in November and December. Every so often somebody will pen an AntiChristmasSong as an antidote, but the only real way to escape the onslaught is to become a {{Hikikomori}} - or go off the grid entirely - for two months a year.

''[[SincerityMode Nevertheless]]'', everyone's got an album that they lovingly pull out from the bottom of the CD cabinet when December rolls around. Despite all the cheap, irritating, and soulless renditions (and re-renditions, and re-re-renditions ''ad nauseam'') to be heard all over the place during the holiday season, the [[ThreeChordsAndTheTruth original simple melodies]] are still there, just waiting to be heard and to remind us why these songs really ''are'' merry and bright. And for those who ''really'' like this stuff, at least one radio station in almost every town goes to [[NetworkDecay all Christmas music all the time on December 1st if not before]].

In other words, when done right, these are still indisputably SugarWiki/AwesomeMusic.

By the way -- and at the risk of being pedantic -- traditional hymns centered around the Nativity are the actual Christmas ''carols''. Tunes about snowfall or Santa are just plain ol' Christmas ''songs'' (or, in some cases, winter songs).

Trivia note: At the end of UsefulNotes/TheVietnamWar, as the North Vietnamese Army reached the outskirts of Saigon, the American Forces Radio Service had to alert Americans in the area without panicking the local populace, all while in the process of smashing their equipment and recordings. As one Vietnam vet put it, he knew the end was near when AFRS began playing Music/BingCrosby singing "Film/WhiteChristmas" in April.

If you're looking for the story by Creator/CharlesDickens, that's ''Literature/AChristmasCarol''. (Except when it's YetAnotherChristmasCarol.) ChristmasCarolers will often be singing these.
----
!!Examples

[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder:Straight]]
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qIuElVFKfAM Jingle Bells]]".
** Also known for the parody lyrics "Jingle Bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg...", which came full circle when, in ''WesternAnimation/BatmanTheAnimatedSeries'', SelfDemonstrating/TheJoker [[FourthWallObserver himself]] [[AscendedMeme sang them]].
** There's also a Japanese version, minus the phrase "Jingle Bells", sung by Japanese pro wrestlers.
** "Jingle Bells" is probably the single best-known and most widely-performed Christmas song of them all...which is rather ironic, given that it doesn't really have anything to do with Christmas specifically, secular ''or'' religious... it's actually a song about young guys in 1850s Medford, Massachusetts, who used to drag-race their one-horse sleighs in the town square. There's a small, hard to find plaque in said town square to commemorate it.
** [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5wtuhjivzxE "Bjällerklang"]], the Swedish version, is about getting out of the house to avoid getting CabinFever, not drag racing. The verses have a slightly altered melody. The first part of the chorus has the same melody as the American version. However, a second chorus with a melody not used in the American version is sung after the original chorus.
* The Pogues' "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HwHyuraau4Q&feature=related Fairytale of New York]]". Notable for turning into an insult fest mid-way through, which was controversially censored by [[TheBBC Radio 1]] in 2007 for a couple of days. Interestingly, Radio 2 (which has a decidedly less daring reputation than its lower-numbered sister station) played it unexpurgated.
** Special mention should be made of this song. It doesn't celebrate Christmas at all ( [[DidIMentionItsChristmas It's merely set on Christmas Eve]]). It is more about the eroding of dreams and the people you've come to hate (but are stuck with). The British keep voting it "Best Christmas Song" in various polls. Something about being stuck with family resonates with us, we think.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z8Vfp48laS8 Happy Christmas (War is Over)]]" by JohnLennon.
** Not to mention "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9BZDpni56Y Wonderful Christmastime]]", by [[PaulMcCartney Sir Paul McCartney]].
*** JarsOfClay released [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V5Fm-uZxMD4 a cover]] if one wishes to hear a version much lighter on the synthesizers.
*** And if you'd like to hear the song with even ''more'' synthesizers, [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=twnruhsU5SU Earthsuit has you covered.]]
*** {{Maroon5}} recently recorded a [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-c7S56HvBg minimalist version]], just piano, guitar and keyboard. Meanwhile, The Polyphonic Spree went [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=it2gRHPp88g the opposite extreme]] (given that the band includes a nine-piece chorus, full brass ensemble, clarinet, flute, violin, harp and theramin, this is to be expected).
** Speaking of Music/TheBeatles, there's always "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ovX5bcIxTQ8 Christmas Time Is Here Again]]", a delightful ditty composed especially for their 1967 fan club single.
* "Merry Xmas Everybody" by Music/{{Slade}} is pretty much ''the'' Christmas song in England, as it's heard in shops across the country the minute they start advertising "It's almost Christmas", which is usually around mid-October.
* "Christmas Time is Here", Ray Parker Jr.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zuZWTBqqO8E The Little Drummer Boy]]".
** The counterpoint duet [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DiXjbI3kRus "Peace on Earth"/"Little Drummer Boy"]], created for a 1977 ChristmasSpecial, has endured for upwards of 30 years due to its unique teaming of Music/DavidBowie and Bing Crosby. Depending on your mindset, it can be enjoyed straight or as kitsch.
** And there's the 1970 version by The JacksonFive, where Michael substitutes "mule" for "lamb". Also the only time you'll hear "Baby Jesus" in the song, instead of the classical "Baby Jesu" or the "little baby" more commonly heard today.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y0MaEsqJRcQ Silver Bells]]" - Debuted in a now little known holiday comedy starring BobHope called ''[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uoekfgmbe-o The Lemon-Drop Kid]]''.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=20_eed97Lzw Do You Hear What I Hear]]" - An allegorical Christmas song dealing with the [[UsefulNotes/ColdWar Cuban Missile Crisis]] -- [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Do_You_Hear_What_I_Hear%3F#cite_ref-lat_0-1 explanation here]].
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HVgCOgtklew Carol of the Bells]]"
** Also known as "Ring Christmas Bells" or [[TheOneWith "that creepy Christmas song"]], especially after it was prominently featured in ''HomeAlone''.
** PinkMartini recently did a cover of this in its original Ukrainian, called "Shchedryk" (Nightingales).
* "[[DreamingOfAWhiteChristmas White Christmas]]"
** Insert cocaine joke here.
** Insert racism joke here.
** Insert wry observation here: The composer, Irving Berlin, was Jewish.
** Insert sexual innuendo here.
** And the [[ChorusOnlySong practically unknown]] verse places the dreamer in Beverly Hills. (The Music/{{Carpenters}} included this verse in their version.)
** [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GJSUT8Inl14&feature=related Here is the song in all of it's glory]], sung by BingCrosby.
*** And the FrankSinatra [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YeUMfZzdiEc version]].
*** The OtisRedding [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e5owUdvwcQ0 version]], which may very well me the most emotionally heart-breaking version. (Contemplated putting in the glurge section.)
**** [[RunningGag And for you Anime fans,]] there is a [[Anime/SailorMoon Sailor Mars]] [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_PhREBUJ5zs version]].
* Music/SufjanStevens put out a 5-CD box set of Christmas songs, both old and new. His original songs include "Get Behind Me, Santa!", "Sister Winter", "We're Goin' To The Country", "Put The Lights on the Tree", "That Was the Worst Christmas Ever!" and "Come On! Let's Boogey to the Elf Dance!"
* Music/TransSiberianOrchestra [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AkAhmH40kiM pretty much built their career on this]], their alter-egos being a more conventional rock group that despite multiple albums made no money whatsoever until they had a crossover hit with Christmas tunes. Several full albums of such followed.
* Mannheim Steamroller's best-known work has been [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rhc2DSsDhG0 Christmas music]].
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPG3zSgm_Qo Christmas Time Is Here]]" by Music/VinceGuaraldi, from ''ACharlieBrownChristmas''.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IirR7z_024Q The Christmas Song]]" ([[RefrainFromAssuming often known by]] its opening line 'Chestnuts roasting on an open fire'), written by Mel Tormé and Bob Wells, performed by Nat "King" Cole and various others.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OATi34PKNPw Sleigh Ride]]". The original version by Leroy Anderson features a nifty tempo shift halfway through.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VCEZEOYdfwo Santa Claus Is Coming to Town]]"
* "RudolphTheRedNosedReindeer" - America's favorite bit of Christmas "folklore" that was originally created as a marketing gimmick for Montgomery Ward. [[http://www.snopes.com/holidays/christmas/rudolph.asp Really]].
** After Gene Autry's version of "Rudolph" became a big hit, a couple of songwriters realized [[http://www.holidaydecorations.com/Frosty-the-Snowman.html they could write a song that stupid]], so they wrote "FrostyTheSnowman" and gave it to Gene Autry to sing.
* The band Low recorded a mini-album of Christmas songs, some original ("Just Like Christmas"), some cover versions ("Blue Christmas") and some traditional ("Silent Night", "The Little Drummer Boy").
* "I Believe in Father Christmas", by [[Music/EmersonLakeAndPalmer Greg Lake]]. Some folk who don't listen closely to the lyrics have mistaken this song for being anti-religious; however, WordOfGod says it's really about growing up and growing out of some childhood illusions. SarahBrightman's cover of this seems to underline it, since she sang it in this oddly childlike voice.
** Also covered by VerticalHorizon for a Christmas compilation album.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ink52QZNgrA Niño Lindo]]" and "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3DddD7Ighjg Si la Virgen fuera Andina]]", two popular Venezuelan Christmas songs who, rare in the genre, actually remember why ''Christ''mas is called that. Popularized by the versions of several child chorus and the ones by Nancy Ramos; the latter musical career has essentially reduced to singing those.
* "Mamacita, Dónde Está Santa Claus" is an English-Spanish song involving a kid waiting up for Santa.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ARq6uYSsUq0 Christmas Wrapping]]" by The Waitresses is a cute story about a woman trying to get together with a guy. Various mishaps result in [[StoodUp one or the other of them]] not making the date, until on Christmas Eve, their individual decisions to just sit out Christmas as a result of a hectic year gets them together.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=itdNoGtPQ3I Please Come Home for Christmas]]"
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rEyV8gnC4aQ Merry Christmas, Baby]]"
* TheKillers tend to release a Christmas song each December with the proceeds going to charity. So far they've recorded:
** "A Great Big Sled" (2006), a Springsteenian ode to lost innocence, produced by famed British alt rock producer Alan Moulder.
** "Don't Shoot Me Santa" (2007), a novelty song about Santa [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin attempting to kill Brendon Flowers]]. Currently the best selling of all their Christmas singles.
** "Joseph, Better You Than Me" (2008), a gospel-fused song featuring [[PetShopBoys Neil Tennant]] and EltonJohn
** "¡Happy Birthday, Guadalupe!" (2009), a Mexican-pop flavored love song featuring indie rockers Wild Light and Mariachi El Bronx, the mariachi alter-ego of the [=SoCal=] punk band The Bronx
** "Boots" (2010), a melancholy piece of nostalgia featuring samples from ''ItsAWonderfulLife''.
** "The Cowboys' Christmas Ball" (2011), an uptempo, country-sounding somg with aa {{Retraux}} video.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sPxCHi4mLYA O Tannenbaum]]", also known as "O Christmas Tree" in English. Shares its melody with the official state song of Maryland as well as with "The Red Flag", the (semi-)official anthem of the British Labour Party.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lNQgukXc6cw Silent Night]]" - written in Austria on Christmas eve of 1818, has one of the most recognized melodies in world.
** Music/{{Enya}}'s version can be found [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AN3uPrJR7IY&feature=related here]].
** Used in MadeleineLEngle's ''A House Like a Lotus'', when people from all over the world at a little conference [[CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming come together and sing]] ''Silent Night'' in their native languages.
* FranzSchubert's version of "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0sIiDgRbr0 Ave Maria]]".
* "What Child Is This", set to the tune of the (non-Christmas) folk song "Greensleeves".
** "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zdxakRxYt1M Greensleeves]]"
** "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thrGSTIG8Zo What Child Is This]]"
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WIS-u6QD76w O Come All Ye Faithful]]"
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXydDxZpH98 Deck The Halls]]"
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7GRYXwHONgo O Holy Night]]". The original lyrics include an additional verse with an Abolitionist message, which is often lazily {{Bowdlerized}} out in modern recordings by just copy/pasting the first verse twice.
** [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZKX3eyYuJ9c This up-tempo version]] by Third Day includes the original verse, for the curious.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V2rtdsRy8Pc God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen]]" - [[SarcasmMode Some useful trivia]]: nowhere in the ''original version'' do you find the word "ye".
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iO7ySn-Swwc O Come Emmanuel]]" is technically an Advent carol rather than a Christmas one, but...
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kWMmIzk4onw Hark! The Herald Angels Sing]]"
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B2DHvCc7MoY We Wish You a Merry Christmas]]"
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=11GlNvi7hPY Good King Wenceslas]]"
** Used in ''Literature/TheDarkIsRising'' as a favorite carol of the Old Ones. Also mocked in Creator/TerryPratchett's ''Discworld/{{Hogfather}}''.
*** [[CrowningMomentofFunny Also used memorably]] in LoveActually.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vwi-gfMiAeg The First Noel]]"
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7eHtDtZ7hs The Holly and the Ivy]]"
* "Do You Know How Christmas Trees Are Grown?" from ''Film/OnHerMajestysSecretService''.
* One of the few ''bilingual'' Christmas songs to regularly get radio airplay, Jose Feliciano's "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ihW56Xa3XGQ Feliz Navidad/I want to wish you a Merry Christmas]]."
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JPLsJI3gPDg Jesus Christ]]" by Music/BigStar, AlternativeRock's very own Christmas anthem.
* [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pj1mVUEHeUE This Christmas]] Covered by numerous artists in the 40 years since its release, but NO version is better than the classic original by Donny Hathaway.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7oYq_J3w1Ac Give Love on Christmas Day]]", recorded by The Temptations, [[Music/MichaelJackson Jackson 5]], and Johnny Gill.
* Music/RunDMC's "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OR07r0ZMFb8 Christmas in Hollis]]." Recorded for a 1987 charity album, it features Run telling the tale of stumbling upon Santa's very full wallet in a city park, and being tempted to keep it -- but then he decides to do good by returning it, and is miraculously rewarded:
--> But I'd never steal from Santa, 'cause that ain't right
--> So I headed home to mail it back to him that night
--> But when I got home, I bugged, 'cause under the tree
--> Was a letter from Santa that said the dough was for me!
* Anyone else have a soft spot for [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y5yUk4-vSBw Twinkle Twinkle Little Me]]? It's beautiful.
* "[[VideoGame/DanceDanceRevolution Silent Hill]]", by Thomas Howard. No relation to the actual SilentHill.
* Oddly enough, "[[Disney/{{Pinocchio}} When You Wish Upon a Star]]" is considered a Christmas song in Japan, Finland, Sweden, Norway and Denmark. The star referred to is probably the star that led the Magi.
** In Scandinavia it's possibly tied to Disney's TV special "From All of Us to All of You", a perennial must-see.
* ''[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q5Ru2lH6_9k The Nutcracker Suite]]'', by Tchaikovsky. Either the straight orchestra version, or various interpretations. Notably, a swing version originally performed by Les Brown and his Band of Renown, [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I_7AvrTnMpY later played by the Brian Setzer Orchestra]].
** There is also a [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=93W1Cgy9e9A Jazz Rendition]] of the '''whole''' Suite that was arranged by DukeEllington and Billy Strayhorn as apart of the album ''Three Suites'' that includes a Jazz rendition of Grieg's "Peer Gynt Suite" and "Suite Thursday" his tribute to Creator/JohnSteinbeck. You can hear the whole thing starting [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3MihqGJ4PkY here]].
* Probably worth mentioning here but there is actually a LightNovel/MariaSamaGaMiteru Christmas Album. No original songs but several of the seiyuu singing Christmas Carols.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s49gEmTlOTk Some Children See Him]]", one of a number of carols written by Alfred Burt. Can be {{glurge}}-ified because of its {{anvilicious}} socio-political message.
* Music/AngelsAndAirwaves' "Star of Bethlehem". In the album's final release, it was split into two songs: "Star of Bethlehem" and "True Love".
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lb9OVjlEZho We Need a Little Christmas]]", written for TheMusical version of ''Literature/AuntieMame''.
* Carbon Leaf's ''Christmas Child'' album has several original Christmas and winter-themed songs, including the title song about a child counting down the days left, and "Red Punch, Green Punch" about the type of family Christmas parties you find boring as a child but fondly look back on later.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=is4NQkUN3AI Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree]]"
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XpxNNalLTB4 Jingle Bell Rock]]"
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Fe11OlMiz8 The 12 Days of Christmas]]"
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gKZ3tcO-Swo Winter Wonderland]]"
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dw2VX5wQYQg My Favorite Things]]", taken from ''Theatre/TheSoundOfMusic'', has come to be considered one even though it really hasn't anything to do with Christmas (or even winter, save for the one line about snowflakes).
** Music/JohnColtrane's epic jazz version can be heard [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qWG2dsXV5HI here]].
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhH5jPq5mVQ It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas]]"
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TPRrEbUqazY The Most Wonderful Time of the Year]]"
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXQViqx6GMY All I Want for Christmas is You]]" by MariahCarey. Listen to the radio regularly during December, and you will DEFINITELY hear this song.
* In 1990, Pretty Maids released the ''In Santa's Claws'' EP which features two christmas songs ("[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h9myFfCehDM In Santa's Claws]]" and "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8bxHbL8wE9I A Merry Jingle]]", a medley of sorts) along with some live material.
* From [[EltonJohn Elton John's]] heyday in 1973, we have "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IN-Yka-73PE Step Into Christmas]]".
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFEQvd0kJxM Guanaguanare]]", by Jesus Avila.
* Dar Williams' [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t_KiHRHwaAs "The Christians and the Pagans"]] depicts a pair of neo-pagan (and quite possibly lesbian) women spending Christmas Eve with one's devoutly Christian uncle and his family, and how they're able to overcome their respective cultural differences and enjoy the season together. It leavens its [[AnAesop moral message]] with gentle humor, and is a genuinely great song.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Melancholy]]
* "White Christmas" is one of these, as the oft-omitted introductory verse makes (painfully) clear:
-->The sun is shining, the grass is green,
-->The orange and palm trees sway,
-->There's never been such a day,
-->In Beverly Hills, L. A.
-->But it's December the 24th
-->And I'm longing to be up north...
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VFGfCn5rKIM I'll Be Home for Christmas]]", which debuted during the height of UsefulNotes/WorldWarII, but is actually about a college student studying away from home. That said, the war subtext is much more popular, to the point where modern covers have soldiers wishing their families a merry Christmas during the bridge.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RSHevB1QZOM Merry Christmas, Darling]]" by the Music/{{Carpenters}} is another one in which the singer pines for a loved one from whom she's separated, and it too first gained popularity during a war ([[UsefulNotes/VietnamWar Vietnam]], in this case).
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8hzN3Xrv47M Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas]]", which was written for ''MeetMeInStLouis'' and has something of an [[http://www.ew.com/ew/article/0,,1569872,00.html interesting history]].
* "Blue Christmas", written by Billy Hayes and Jay Johnson, famously sung by ElvisPresley, tells a story of unrequited love, making the singer's Christmas anything ''but'' merry.
* Rockapella's "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4vfDLNk8ihI Hold Out for Christmas]]" initially seems whimsical but swiftly reveals itself to be one of these. Starting off "Christmas in Tokyo does not make sense, Santa and Sumo don't mix", and closing with a coda that begins, "Christmas at home is a life away" makes this song a TearJerker for anyone who's ever had to spend a holiday season alone on business travel, in the military, or otherwise away from friends and family.
* [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UV8x7H3DD8Y ''Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)'']], originally recorded by Darlene Love, and covered by everyone from Music/{{U2}} to Music/DeathCabForCutie.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zT9lKyi0dDM Do They Know It's Christmas?]]", first done by [=BandAid=] in 1984 to raise money for the victims of the Ethiopian famine, comparing it with the joyous occasion of Christmas in first-world countries. The subsequent Live Aid concert and charity appeal raised about £150m. Sadly, it may have actually made the situation worse- some journalists have claimed the money ended up in the hands of the military junta, who used for an enforced resettlement program. Up to 100,000 people may have been killed as a result. The earlier civil war had actually made the famine worse.
** As for the song itself, it contains an instance of research failure with the line "There won't be snow in Africa this Christmas time". Tell that one to the people of Kenya...
** Also, "No rain or rivers flow..." [[WebVideo/TheNostalgiaChick except, ya know, that longest river in the world... (the fucking Nile!)]]
** Critics reportedly responded poorly to the two subsequent renditions of the song (in 1988 and 2004) because they felt that they were cashing in on the original, which they said, in spite of its obvious drawbacks, had its heart in the right place.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8gmARGvPlI&ob=av2e Last Christmas]]" by Creator/GeorgeMichael and Wham! Covered by [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jf3fliDJgCA Billie Piper]] and by [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IF6mF0ebX6Q Taylor Swift]].
** [[Anime/SailorMoon And for you Anime fans out there,]] [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5W8AU3dLhXY Rei Hino/Sailor Mars]].
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iTTvBWb0QYw Celebrate Me Home]]" by Kenny Loggins.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sxvd8NEd_C8 It Doesn't Have to Be That Way]]" by Jim Croce.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ar9Ip7pSqEg Same Old Lang Syne]]" by Dan Fogelberg is technically a Christmas song, as it mentions that the events of the song happen on Christmas Eve (Probably because the songwriter needed something that rhymed with "sleeve"). The song is actually about a guy who runs into an ex-girlfriend by chance and the two of them spending the evening catching up on what they've been doing since the apparently amiable breakup.
* Music/{{Coldplay}}'s "Christmas Lights" provides us with yet another example of heartbreak at Christmas.
* Music/StevieWonder's "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qZ1-duv_zNk Someday at Christmas]]" has a little of this, reflecting as it does the singer's wish for a world without the war, violence and unrest of TheSixties when it was written.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IQ8aoBfFbpc Whatever Happened to Christmas?]]" by Music/FrankSinatra. Aimee Mann later did an effective [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XNJXWfXyqgA cover version]].
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WgYFXCUEL4Y 7 O'Clock News/Silent Night]]" by Music/SimonAndGarfunkel.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=chTMOuuUZi4 First Christmas]]" by Music/StanRogers.
* JacksonBrowne's "The Rebel Jesus", originally recorded with Irish folk group The Chieftains for their Christmas album ''The Bells of Dublin'', and then again as a solo version. Listen to the original [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DA4YW6RdoVU here]] and the remake [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PEC7d5jbAbo here]].
* [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCNvZqpa-7Q "White Wine in the Sun"]] by TimMinchin is not exactly a parody, and not entirely straight, and not at all religious Christmas song. It's also an absolute tearjerker.
* "I Hate Christmas Parties" by Relient K. It's about as cheery as it sounds.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Sx84T3ALMA Red Water (Christmas Mourning)]]" by Music/TypeONegative is a dirge-like remembrance of people in the singer's family who've died in the last year. It may be the single most depressing Christmas song ever.

[[/folder]]


[[folder:Parody/Humorous]]

* [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vPaGQEskSKM "Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer"]] by Elmo & Patsy.
** And the sequel song, "[[GrandmaGotRunOverByAReindeer Grandpa's Gonna Sue the Pants Off of Santa]]"
** There was... an acoustic blues version of "Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer" done by Poe.
** Dr. Elmo also made a 2000 election version as well as another sequel song, "Please Don't Make Me Play That Grandma Song Again"; Dr. Elmo takes the role of a beleaguered radio DJ who is weary of playing that song. The self-deprecating humor (he criticizes his own singing) is brilliant.
** Da Yoopers did a parody called "Grandpa Got Run Over by a Beer Truck."
** A parody of a parody: "Grandpa Got Runned Over by a John Deere" by Cledus T. Judd. And yes, it's still a Christmas song... sorta.
** There was also (during the height of their career) a parody song called [[NewKidsOnTheBlock "New Kids Got Run Over By A Reindeer"]] ...
* Michigan State University's all-male a cappella ensemble the Spartan Dischords have their own holiday season medley called "Christmas Soup" (more a mash-up than a medley) which evolves with popular culture as seen in their 2011 Winter Concert [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9dUKs1vr7rI here]]. This ain't yer grandpa's The Twelve Days Of Christmas, not by a '''long''' shot. As just '''one''' of '''many''' examples of [[ExpospeakGag absurd lyrical juxtaposition within this musical agglomeration]],
--> I'm dreamin' of a' Six geese a' layin',
--> Jack Frost nippin' at your nose.
* Most of the Bob Rivers catalogue.
* Music/BobDylan's klezmer-style rendition of "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8qE6WQmNus Must Be Santa]]". Nothing like a good old-fashioned Hanukkah themed Christmas song!
* Music/JethroTull with their whole ''Christmas Album'', (though a few ''almost'' play it straight, at least in spirit).
** Also, [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h90JVJmPmt0 'A Christmas Song']] one of their earlier songs (reworked on the Christmas Album). Starts off as a traditional carol and then changes theme.
--> Once in Royal David’s City
-->Stood a lowly cattle shed,
-->Where a mother laid her baby.
-->You’d do well to remember the things He later said.
-->When you’re stuffing yourselves at the Christmas parties,
-->You’ll laugh when I tell you to take a running jump.
-->You’re missing the point I’m sure does not need making;
-->The Christmas spirit is not what you drink...

-->...[outro] Hey, Santa, pass that bottle will you?

* "Rusty Chevrolet", an ode to TheAllegedCar, again by Da Yoopers.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dyDc1s9imvI Christmas at Ground Zero]]" and "The Night Santa Went Crazy", both by Music/WeirdAlYankovic.
** His song "Weasel Stomping Day", sung in typical [[{{Glurge}} Glurgical]] Christmas style, concerns a fictitious holiday in which people wear Viking helmets, spread mayonnaise on their lawns, and [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin squish weasels under their boots]].
* JonathanCoulton's "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3DyxaCYlfg&eurl=http://www.jonathancoulton.com/songdetails/Chiron%20Beta%20Prime&feature= Chiron Beta Prime]]"
** Don't forget "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=50UhOdBHsQg Podsafe Christmas Song]]" and "[[http://www.jonathancoulton.com/songdetails/Christmas%20Is%20Interesting# Christmas is Interesting]]".
* "Have Yourself a Scary Little Christmas", album credited to ''Series/TalesFromTheCrypt'' and the Cryptkeeper.
* "Leroy the Redneck Reindeer," by Joe Diffie.
* "Redneck 12 Days of Christmas," JeffFoxworthy.
* "Here's Your Sign Christmas," Creator/BillEngvall (not really parody, but comedy if you like the performer).
* "[[http://www.cthulhulives.org/solsticecarol.html The Carol of the Old Ones]]"
** "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ptP0OR-e7rI Death to the World]]
** "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AaI4d2Yg-sY Silent Night, Blasphemous Night]]
** "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ie9S59ZzLFM It's The Most Horrible Time Of The Year]]
** "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KbzuzSbCyfQ Awake Ye Scary Great Old Ones]]
** "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g2DscvVye94 Oh Come All Ye Old Ones]]
** "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcNdPeZdAVs Away In A Madhouse]]
** "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vsgg51dNeCk Great Old Ones Are Coming To Town]]
** "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rflsHvtTTGw I'm Dreaming Of a Dead City]]
** "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ocsOIYYedV8 Mi-Go We Have Heard On High]]
** "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3tTHn2tHhcI It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Fishmen]]
* "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DtZR3lJobjw A Christmas Carol]]" by TomLehrer.
* "Santa Looked a Lot Like Daddy" by Buck Owens, covered by Music/GarthBrooks and pretty much every other male country artist at one time or another.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xOMmSbxB_Sg Santa Baby]]" by Eartha Kitt, covered by Music/{{Madonna}} and pretty much every other female artist at one time or another.
** [[AndZoidberg And]] Music/{{Everclear}}.
* ''Series/MysteryScienceTheater3000'''s "(Let's Have) a Patrick Swayze Christmas".
** and the Mike-Era "Merry Christmas...If That's Okay", which pokes fun at the whole PoliticalCorrectnessGoneMad & the whole stupid "War On Christmas" phenomenon.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9Bf2H59cLM I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus]]"
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHKTj02cmHI Father Christmas]]", by TheKinks, in which a man playing Father Christmas outside a (presumably British) department store is mugged by street thugs. "Father Christmas, give us your money! Don't mess around with those silly toys!" Punkest Christmas song ever!
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g_VhHqK6yoQ All I Want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth]]" by Spike Jones.
** And "I'm the Angel in the Christmas Play" by the same, which is about an unrepentant delinquent cheerfully admitting to all the mischief he's been up to, ending each verse with an announcement that he's playing the angel in the school Christmas play.
* "I Won't Be Home for Christmas" by [[Music/{{Blink182}} blink-182]], with a chorus that goes "It's Christmas time again/It's time to be nice to the people you can't stand."
** Also "Happy Holidays, You Bastard" - "It's Christmas Eve and I've only wrapped 2 f*** ing presents."
* "No Presents for Christmas" by Music/KingDiamond.
* "Merry F** king Christmas" and "A Lonely Jew on Christmas", both from ''WesternAnimation/SouthPark''.
* SarahSilverman's "Give the Jew Girl Toys", the video of which ends in Silverman cuddling next to a BoundAndGagged Santa Claus.
* Denis Leary has a Christmas special as well as a song by the title ''Merry F** king Chistmas'', complete with overly cynical lyrics such as "Old St. Nick's got bourbon breath / It's so cold you could catch your death / A cop just sold me crystal meth / It's a merry f** king Christmas"
* Sort of borderline, but ''[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tN2NNwZ1op8 Merry Christmas (I Don't Want to Fight Tonight)]]'' by the Ramones.
* "Ohhhh, Santa Claus, [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSilUOS4Ph8 Santa Claus, You are much too fat..."]] The highlight of many an Elementary School Christmas performance.
* ''Jingle Bell Metal'' by Psychostick contains parodies of several Christmas songs.
* "Ho Ho [BEEP] Ho" by Kevin Bloody Wilson.
* TheyMightBeGiants have a few, most of which involve Santa Claus acting like a dick to the narrator.
* In ''[[Series/TheColbertReport A Colbert Christmas]]: [[http://www.colbertnation.com/video?keywords=A+Colbert+Christmas The Greatest Gift of All]]'', Stephen performs the cheery, extremely unsubtle "[[http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/211035/november-23-2008/a-colbert-christmas--another-christmas-song Another Christmas Song]]", which is all about people buying "Another Christmas Song" and hopefully making it a yearly Christmas standard so that Stephen can get rich. Multiple levels of metafiction at once coupled with multiple levels of SpecialEffectFailure.
** And let us not forget "[[http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/211033/november-23-2008/a-colbert-christmas--jon-stewart Can I Interest You in Hanukkah?]]" the token multicultural song, and a sort of anthem for InformedJudaism.
** And Toby Keith's "[[http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/211034/november-23-2008/a-colbert-christmas--toby-keith-sings War on Christmas]]", a subtle ([[MisaimedFandom perhaps TOO subtle]]) parody of StrawmanPolitical rants, swearing violent revenge against the forces of PoliticalCorrectnessGoneMad.
* The cast of ''WebVideo/SailorMoonAbridged'' did an album of parody songs, that can be bought on their site.
* The "Christmas Scare-ols," written to give [[DisneyThemeParks Disneyland]] visitors something to do while waiting in line for the Haunted Mansion Holiday attraction, comprise an assortment of traditional Christmas songs re-arranged in a minor key and with the lyrics altered to reflect the sensibilities of the denizens of [[WesternAnimation/TheNightmareBeforeChristmas Halloween Town]].
* Tiny Tim released the jaw-dropping "Santa Claus Has Got The AIDS This Year."
* Disturbingly, there are ''two'' novelty Christmas songs about fisting: "[=XXXMas=] Song" by Vinnie and the Stardusters and "Fist Me This Christmas" by the Wet Spots.
* "The Twelve Days ''After'' Christmas" focuses on the downsides of owning all the gifts from its namesake song, and the nasty breakup between the "true loves" that results.
-->''The four calling birds were a big mistake / for their language was obscene / the five golden rings were completely fake / and they turned my fingers green!''
** The title works only because many people don't realize that the actual "Twelve Days of Christmas" ''are'' after Christmas; they are the twelve days from Christmas to Epiphany.
* Thrash band Whiplash has a song called "I Hate Christmas", with arguably one of the greatest lines in all of music: "Jingle Bells, I'll see you in Hell!"
* Rhan Wilson's [[http://www.altared.com/ Altared Christmas]] series. The gimmick? What if you played Christmas songs in a DarkerAndEdgier minor key? It's a lot better than it sounds, that's what.
* You Ain't Getting S*** for Christmas. The song is hilarious when ma "Takes the two fruitcakes and the turkey and throws them out the front window."
* Music/RayStevens has several, including "Xerox Xmas Letter," (an over-the-top Christmas letter for "Nightmare Before Christmas" (where he dreams that a bunch of lawyers take Santa to court for wearing fur, smoking, working only one day a year, etc.).
* The Jingle Bell Barking Dogs.
** And their feline counterparts.
* There is a disturbingly hilarious parody of "Walkin' In a Winter Wonderland" called "Walkin' Round In Women's Underwear", about crossdressing.
** That's courtesy Bob Rivers, a parodist who basically makes a living off of songs like "Grabbe Yahbalz" ("Grab your balls like Music/MichaelJackson! Fa-la-la-la-la...), "The Twelve Pains of Christmas", "The 'What's It to Ya?' Chorus", "I Came Upon a Roadkill Deer", "The Restroom Door Said 'Gentlemen'", and, most brilliantly, "O Little Town of Bethlehem" set to the tune of "The House of the Rising Sun", with a pretty good Dylan impersonation.
* And let's not forget "Monster Holiday", the Christmas-themed sequel to "The Monster Mash".
* Music/{{ACDC}} gives us "Mistress for Christmas", which (as one might have guessed from an AC/DC song) is [[BawdySong less about the "Christmas" part and more about the "Mistress" part]].
* "Please Santa Claus" by Creator/AnnaRussell.
* [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aogz162O5pE The 12 Guido Days of Christmas]].
* "No More Christmas Singles", the ''SpittingImage''... er... [[HypocriticalHumour Christmas Single]].
-->No more Christmas singles\\
They're worse than any war\\
If we hear Aled Jones again\\
[[{{Glurge}} We'll throw up on the floor]]
* The entire ''Oi to the World'' album by the Vandals, but especially "My First Christmas As a Woman".
** The title song - later covered by No Doubt - is about an Indian punk and a skinhead getting in a fight that nearly results in the death of both of them - at least, until the spirit of the holidays wins out.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SxgHVuzWUHc Elf's Lament]]" by Barenaked Ladies and featuring Michael Buble.
* [[http://www.svse.net/holidays2010/ This]] commercial for (the fake) "The Sharks A Capella Holiday Album". It manages not only to make fun of and lampshade holiday songs and albums, but also the commercials that are used to peddle them as well.
-->'''Announcer:''' Yes, vocal tones so unique and distinctive, only your dog can truly appreciate them!
* ''The Twelve Days of Christmas with Doug and Bob [=McKenzie=]'', aka ''The Canadian Twelve Days of Christmas''.
--> On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: 5 GOLDEN TOQUES!
--> ...and a beer.
--> ...in a treeeeee...
* [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rCeDqmgg9ec I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus]], by Stand Still.
* [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BQ1386ytTjU Make A Daft Noise For Christmas]] and [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0OrfFof-SN4&feature=related Father Christmas Do Not Touch Me]] (about "a most immoral Santa") by Series/TheGoodies.
* [[color:purple:Hark, how the]] [[VerbalTic WAA]] [[color:purple:all seem to]] [[VerbalTic WAA,]] [[color:purple:joining in rhyme.]] [[Webcomic/BrawlInTheFamily WALUIGI TIME!]]
* 1960s garage-rock band The Sonics did [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T7XJUeHWePw "Don't Believe in Christmas"]], airing typical holiday disappointments to the tune of Chuck Berry's "Too Much Monkey Business".
* [[WesternAnimation/HowTheGrinchStoleChristmas "You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch"]]
* Kip Addotta's ''I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus''. [[spoiler: It's actually Mommy in disguise.]]
* [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KqSljlG4Qg The Hives & Cyndi Lauper - A Christmas Duel]] I bought no gifts this year And I slept with your sister.
* ''A cappela'' group Straight No Chaser has a song called "12 Days" that blends "The Twelve Days of Christmas" with... almost everything. It starts fairly normal, until about half the group jumps from two to four, and is corrected by the other half, who interpolate the third day lyrics in, before ending up somehow at ''five golden rings''. And then they start throwing in "Deck the Halls" and "Here We Come A-Wassailing" and, I kid you not, Toto's "Africa". [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Fe11OlMiz8 Seriously, just listen.]]
* "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IGiAWF7IXa8 All I Want for Christmas Is to Rock]]" by HairMetal band [[FakeBand Sniper]].
* Creator/AllanSherman's "The Twelve Gifts Of Christmas," with such offerings as A Japanese transistor radio, green polka dot pajamas, a calendar book with the name of his insurance man, simulated alligator wallet and much more. On the twelfth day, he's going to exchange them all.
* "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B8i0ypSqBxE Santa Claus Is Pagan Too]]" by Neopagan group Emerald Rose. A fairly good-natured TakeThat at Christians who are either ignorant of or prefer to disregard the Pagan origins of many Christmas traditions.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yzJuCpCgEzg&feature=c4-overview&list=UUcKMq7RogzFxeT9aimWwDpw Green Leaves]]", Lazy Smurf's parody of "Greensleeves" and "What Child Is This" that is sung about [[OdeToIntoxication the joys of smoking]] [[FantasticDrug smurfnip]] in the ''Fanfic/EmpathTheLuckiestSmurf'' story "A Haunted Christmas". Also in the same story is "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_0YHGO_AwGY&feature=c4-overview&list=UUcKMq7RogzFxeT9aimWwDpw Streams Of Sarsaparilla Ale]]", a parody of "Good King Wenceslas".
** And in the same universe, there's "The 12 Smurfs Of Christmas".
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=2OrOBMM_pcQ The 12 Drugs Of Christmas]]".
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y3mRC-foSZs Christmas at the Zoo]]" by The Music/FlamingLips. What's more Christmas than breaking into a zoo to free all the animals?
* The Chieftains' Christmas album ''The Bells of Dublin'' includes a hilarious collaboration with Music/ElvisCostello called "St. Stephan's Day Murders". Christmas is over, and a few members of the family have ''had it'' with holiday cheer.
* Music/ButtholeSurfers recorded a version of "Good King Wencelaus". It mainly fits this category because Gibby Haynes spends most of the song in a faux-drunken monologue (complete with slurred speech, stuttering and the occasional AlcoholHic), where he's alternately commenting on the music itself or just ranting incoherently about, say, bugs having sex.
* [[http://quasistoic.org/PinkStainlessTail%20-%20jinglerockbell.mp3 "Jingle Rock Bell"]] is, well, a rendition of "Jingle Bell Rock" with all of the lyrics replaced with the words "jingle", "bell", and "rock" (e.g. "Bell jingle, rock jingle, rock rock bell / Bell rock, jingle rock, bell rock bell"). It originated when [[http://ask.metafilter.com/13267/Why-do-I-associate-Rockin-Around-The-Christmas-Tree-with-great-tragedy#229794 a metafilter user]] commented that he liked to sing the song that way, to his wife's annoyance.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Glurge-laden]]
'''These are very much YMMV. One person's Glurge is another person's Crowning Moment of Heartwarming. Please don't natter about how you disagree with an entry.'''

* The "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RglCGqoyyL4 Coventry Carol]]" is probably the [[TropeMaker oldest]] of these songs. It was originally part of a stage play written in the 16th century; the song is essentially about the [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Massacre_of_the_Innocents Massacre Of The Innocents]] that takes place after the birth of Jesus.
* And that old classic, "I Want a [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ho-DzFR2jic Hippopotamus]] for Christmas". It sounds like a funny parody, except that hippos are one of the most aggressive and dangerous animals on the planet. Not so funny anymore, is it?
* "Grandma, We Love You" by the St. Winnifreds Girls' School Choir went to No.1 in the UK.
** It's not even the strangest thing to have got to No.1 in this country. Our charts are weird.
* "Granddad" with Clive Dunn likewise.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GpFudDAYqxY River]]" by Music/JoniMitchell.
* Any song about New Year's Eve, although not directly related with Christmas, but in some countries begins to air about the same time. The glurgiest one is "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDwGsLEU3ho Faltan Cinco Pa' Las Doce]]", either the original by Nestor Zavarce or the Jose Luis Rodiguez version, who in Venezuela is ritually broadcast into any radial New Year Countdown ''ever''.
** Well, not ''any'' song. Try JudyGarland's "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nJR-5zxFa9w Happy New Year]]" on for size sometime.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0a_Y1wAJ2MU Christmas Shoes]]", the [[OneHitWonder only mainstream radio hit]] by Christian pop group Newsong, is a story told by a man who was griping about the shopping crunch, reminded of the TrueMeaningOfChristmas by an extremely poor little boy trying to gather enough [[strike: change]] ''pennies'' to buy shoes for his mother who might very well die on Christmas Eve. Not only glurgy, but also highly manipulative and depressing.
-->'''Little boy:''' ''Daddy says there's not much time / You see, she's been sick for quite a while \\
And I know these shoes will make her smile / And I want her to look beautiful / If Mama meets Jesus tonight.''
** There is also a good chunk of possible ValuesDissonance; in at the end of the song the narrator concludes that God ''arranged the whole thing, tragedy included, just [[ItsAllAboutMe to teach him the true meaning of Christmas]]''.
** Also the assumption that JacobMarleyApparel is in effect and that [[GodIsFlawed Jesus is shallow enough to care]]. Oh, and let's not forget that the poor kid is ''not only'' about to lose his mother, but blow the last of his cash just to make her smile one last time when he's going to sorely need it to help keep himself alive very soon.
** All of which makes PattonOswalt's standup comedy bit giving the song a TakeThat by parsing its meaning line-by-line that much more hilarious. Watch it (with bonus animated accompaniment) [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iq10bz3PxyY here]].
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iOic7t1kZog Grown-Up Christmas List]]", originally performed by Natalie Cole and David Foster but a favorite of cheesy, melisma-loving pop singers everywhere.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rur534Yzb-g Happy Birthday, Jesus]]" by The Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir. Starts out as a cheesy version of the standard Happy Birthday song, and by the time it gets to the lyric "I'm so glad it's Christmas / All the tinsel and lights / And the presents are nice / But the real gift is you" you will probably want to kill.
** It's usually performed at Christmas concerts by the absolute youngest member of any given choir, too. So imagine those lyrics sung in a wavering, high-pitched falsetto to get the full effect.
*** Another "Happy Birthday, Jesus" was recorded in 1959 by an intolerably sweet moppet called Little Cindy. She was a child evangelist apparently, with a godawful (fake?) Southern accent: "She said you was so awful good/ And then she made me crah/ She said they nailed you to the cross/ They wanted you to dah." It was recently re-issued by Creator/JohnWaters in a compilation album of bad Xmas recordings.
*** And yet another version of "Happy Birthday, Jesus" features an insufferable little boy gaily singing about how he got only one gift that year, his mother's aforementioned song.
* Another one for the pile: "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=muQhSwVBkAo Merry Christmas]]" by the Christian band Third Day.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wn9QC9vuaDY Christmas in the Northwest]]" by Brenda White.
* "Christmastime in Arkansas Again". A syrupy-sweet reflection about Christmas and an unashamed tribute to the state of Arkansas, with a locally famous ''weatherman'' named Ned Perme on piano.
* "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=clePvNtJWpw The Cat Carol]]". Sweet Jesus, "The Cat Carol".
* "[[http://youtu.be/QTdzjSPZv8g Ven a mi casa esta Navidad]]" by Luis Aguile, about the singer offering a friend without friends or family to spend Christmas with him and his family, is in the line between Glurge and TearJerker. Other singers versioning this go with glurgey.
* How in the great name of FSM did all'y'all miss "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NGDjpWT6G-o Please Daddy (Don't Get Drunk This Christmas)]]" by John Denver? The [[LyricalDissonance contrast of the lyrics with the cheery, upbeat music]] makes it more depressing than a really depressing thing.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Other]]
* "Yule Shoot Your Eye Out" by Fall Out Boy. Contains lyrics such as 'Merry Christmas, I could care less' and 'all I want this year is for you to dedicate your last breath to me, before you bury yourself alive.'
** Fall Out Boy also did a cover of "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTUAnk6gXdM What's This?]]" from ''WesternAnimation/TheNightmareBeforeChristmas''
* "Santa Stole My Girlfriend" by The Maine. The title is pretty self-explanatory. Chorus calls Santa an obscene name.
* [[http://www.thesneeze.com/mt-archives/000570.php O Holy Crap]]. Good lord, good lord.
** Not to be confused with [[WebAnimation/HomestarRunner that one wrestleman's]] [[http://www.homestarrunner.com/xmas.html "O Holy Crap."]]
*** Speaking of Homestar Runner, [[http://www.homestarrunner.com/xmas08_album.html Hooked on Decemberween]] features a collection of [[YouMeanXmas Decemberween]] songs form previous 'toons, along with some new ones.
* WebVideo/TheNostalgiaChick did a countdown of the Top Ten Most Disturbing And Inescapable Christmas Songs. With all the {{Glurge}} and creepy messages the titular songs featured, it's probably no wonder that she filled it with BlackComedy and horrific imagery.
* Pictured above: The ''StarWars'' album ''Christmas in the Stars'', which is not quite as infamous as ''Film/TheStarWarsHolidaySpecial'' but comparably misconceived (at least they don't sing about "Life Day" here). It featured the voices of Anthony Daniels and, on "R2-D2 We Wish You A Merry Christmas," an 18-year-old named [[BonJovi John Bongiovi]].
* In ''FullMetalJacket'' has DrillSergeantNasty singing "Happy Birthday" to Jesus as the platoon stands at attention.
* "All I want for Christmas is to Kick Your Ass", by the Midnight Riders. Yes the band made up for ''VideoGame/Left4Dead2''.
* In 2007 or 2008, Sting was asked by his label if he would like to do a Christmas album. He refused, but instead released a ''winter''-themed album, 2009's ''If on a Winter's Night.''
* In Venezuela, GaitaZuliana are often lumped with other Christmas songs, despite most of the songs that are not about [[OdeToIntoxication partying]], [[HymnToMusic how great singing Gaita is]] or [[ProtestSong current issues]] are about either Our Lady of Chinquinquirá (November 18), San Benito de Palermo (December 27), and New Year's Eve.
[[/folder]]

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