[[quoteright:350:[[VisualNovel/FateStayNight http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/utw_fate_stay_night_unlimited_blade_works.jpg]]]]
[[caption-width-right:350:What's wrong? You're usually more [[{{Tsundere}} harsh]] than ''this''.]]

A character who is unusually aggressive and domineering in their relationships and particularly romantic/sexual advances, yet relinquishes all control the moment it comes to actually having sex with their loved one.

This behavior is commonly displayed by "harsh" {{Tsundere}}s. Parallels can be drawn between this and a FauxActionGirl. Indeed, women in fiction end up on the receiving end of this trope much more often than men (cf. MenActWomenAre).

An extreme variation, dipping deep into CharacterDerailment, is often found in fanworks (especially {{H|entai}}-{{Doujinshi}}) starring a canonically [[{{Dominatrix}} dominant and assertive female character]], who remains dominant and assertive right up to the point where the [[EscapistCharacter faceless male reader stand-in]] takes off her clothes.

Note that TropesAreNotBad when used appropriately, and even this one can present an interesting dichotomy in a character to explore for drama and CharacterDevelopment. It only becomes off-putting when perpetrated in fanworks upon characters who you'd reasonably expect to [[BastardGirlfriend behave in bed the same way they do in canon]].

For the male/male case, this is a [[UsefulNotes/BoysLoveTypes standard]] (although somewhat less common) type of {{Uke}} in BoysLoveGenre works. They're similarly likely to be {{Tsundere}}. Because this is a same-sex variation, the DoubleStandard does not apply, so this trope is generally used in-character. More uncommonly, but still very much present, you will find ''inversions'' of this trope, with an aggressive (or even violent) {{Seme}} who becomes compliant, gentle and subservient to the {{Uke}}'s wishes while in-bed - playing with the balance of physical and emotional control in the relationship. The exceptions for in-character usage of this trope are again fanworks where canon characters are used for WishFulfillment.[[note]]Or just someone not writing characters well.[[/note]]

Compare CasualKink, PropertyOfLove, SafeSaneAndConsensual, SafeWord and AllWomenAreDomsAllMenAreSubs. Contrast NaughtyByNight.
!! Canon examples


[[folder: Anime And Manga ]]
* ''Cream Lemon'': In ''Pop Chaser'', BadassBiker {{Tomboy}} Rio becomes the {{Uke}} to the smaller, sweeter GirlyGirl Mai's {{Seme}}.
* Celty in ''LightNovel/{{Durarara}}'' is a BadassBiker [[HeadlessHorseman dullahan]] who beats up crooks and saves people, while her boyfriend Shinra is a back-alley doctor with a masochistic streak. She's a type B {{Tsundere}} and he enjoys verbally provoking her, which often leads to her wrapping him in shadows as punishment. However, Shinra says "At night, Celty's actually like a little bunny--" which immediately causes her to try and shut him up because she's [[Funny/{{Durarara}} practically dying of embarrassment from having their sex life discussed in a room full of people]].
* Mio from ''LightNovel/{{MM}}'' is a very dominant girl for the entire anime series, but in the first two [[{{Omake}} DVD Extras]] they have her getting dominated by a cat and another girl respectively. The extras were supposed to be FanService, but they felt like FetishRetardant to those that were hoping for more Mio femdom. Eventually one extra focusing on her sadist side showed up, but only one.
* Kyouko Oomiya in ''Manga/FutariEcchi'', in her relationship with Matsuzaki, at least in the early phases. On one hand he was TheCasanova and she a 30-year-old virgin when they started dating but, on the other hand, she is imposingly bossy and he is actually insecure about himself.
* Mafuyu from {{hentai}} {{OVA}}s ''Kanojo x Kanojo x Kanojo'' is a quite interesting example. The first episode has her being a really domineering EmotionlessGirl. The second episode has her dominant too, BUT the guy ends turning the tables on her seemingly for no reason (as he never does that to other girls, and he seemed fine with her dominance on episode 1). That's where the series originally ended, but then they announced a third episode, and on it Mafuyu was hit by massive {{Chickification}} and became just as cheerfully emotional and non-dominant as the other girls; this [[BrokenBase broke the base]], with more masochistic viewers feeling this unfortunate as [[EnsembleDarkhorse her dominance and quietness made her popular]] among them, and more sadistic viewers actually liking the final result, since no lack of emotions and no female dominance goes unpunished.
* Hana in ''Seikon no Qwaser'' is a lesbian version. At first we see she's a quite rough girl with others, but soon she gets dominated by [[FilleFatale Katja]] and clearly ''loves'' it. Then come the second season and she ''subverts'' this by showing she can be dominant with other girls, so she probably likes being both sub and dom depending of her partner.
* ''Manga/NanaToKaoru'': Nana is an angry tsundere until she gets [[UsefulNotes/{{BDSM}} all tied up]].
* Yuno from ''Manga/FutureDiary'' is very direct and aggressive towards Yukiteru, until she finally "becomes one" with him. Then she becomes super-shy and even bottoms! Notably, she goes back to being her usual aggressive self right after they're done.
* Inverted by Fuyuka in ''Manga/HaruNatsuAkiFuyu'', who is a ShrinkingViolet in day-to-day life but unexpectedly [[BewareTheQuietOnes dominates the heck out of Natsuki when they finally do it]].
* A non-sexual example: Zoisite in the 90s ''Anime/SailorMoon'' is the one who initiates nearly all physical contact with his lover Kunzite, despite being completely subservient to him normally.
* Hori from ''Manga/{{Horimiya}}'' has a short temper and is rather domineering, but admits that she likes the idea of [[NiceGuy Miyamura]] acting like a BastardBoyfriend. It's PlayedForLaughs.

[[folder: Comic Books ]]
* In ''ComicBook/TheDarkKnightStrikesAgain'' and ''ComicBook/AllStarBatmanAndRobinTheBoyWonder'', this describes the relationship between Franchise/{{Superman}} and Franchise/WonderWoman. Wonder Woman is a StrawFeminist who shows nothing except contempt for men and the world that they dominate. At the same time, however, she maintains a SlapSlapKiss relationship with Superman, whom she admires for being the only man on the planet who could [[BestHerToBedHer throw her to the ground and MAKE her his]].
* ''SelfDemonstrating/{{Deadpool}}'' has aspects of this. Very little of what he says is serious and much of what he says is outrageous, but with [[UnusualEuphemism y'know, snuggling]] or rather anything vaguely intimate--particularly the rare honest conversation--his dialogue is less amusing and his body language becomes submissive.
* In ''ComicBook/{{Sunstone}}'', which is all about BDSM, Lisa Williams is an assertive extrovert in most of her life, but is a sexual submissive in her relationship with introvert Allison Carter. It should be noted that this is not at all uncommon: one theory of BDSM is that the submissive actually has all the power, and the dominant does all the work to please the submissive.

[[folder: Film ]]
* A RareMaleExample: In the original ''Film/AmericanPie'' movie, the guy pursued the band girl (eventually giving up on the sex wager), but she ended up dominant during their sex scene.

[[folder: Literature ]]
* Thandi Palane from the ''Literature/HonorHarrington'' series is described as very sexually submissive, as a respite from her domineering public 'strong' facade. The fact that she's a genetically engineered HeavyWorlder SuperSoldier who can break most men in half and once crushed a man's skull in with her bare fist has made it hard to find men who aren't afraid of her.
** At one point she asks newfound boyfriend Victor Cachat, "Did it ever occur to you that a lady weight-lifter might get tired of it?"
** Victor's morning-after musings also include the line, "Dominating her had been like a mortal dominating a goddess, a feat possible only because the goddess herself willed it."
** Note that Cachat himself, while repeatedly described in the books as a ''[[OneManArmy Death incarnate]]'' in certain circumstances, is actually a [[PlayingWithATrope pretty scrawny]] and [[WeakButSkilled physically non-imposing guy]]. And a bit of a prude to boot.
* Mitza Lizalor in ''Literature/FoundationAndEarth''. She's a high-ranking member of the government on a SexIsEvilAndIAmHorny PlanetOfHats and is socially dominant with her people and in conversation with the protagonist. She also quite likes sex but is disappointed with the guilt that men on her planet feel about it, so the protagonist uses his supernatural intuition to dominate her in bed. She remains most satisfied, although Golan does realize he should make further visits to the planet and her office few if he doesn't want to go OutWithABang.
* [[spoiler:[[DefrostingIceQueen Sidonie]]]] takes on this role in some of the later ''Literature/KushielsLegacy'' novels.
* In the ''Literature/MillenniumTrilogy'', Lisbeth Salander tends to be aggressive and dominating when she's just having sex for the sake of sex, but becomes surprisingly submissive when she's with her on-again, off-again girlfriend Mimmi.
* Nynaeve al'Meara in ''Literature/TheWheelOfTime'', thanks in (nominal) part to a custom of the people who officiate her marriage: that the spouse with the higher status in public should defer to the other spouse in private. It's left entirely off-screen, so the only word on the matter is from her: "Glorious".

[[folder: Live-Action Television ]]
* Mickey Milkovich in ''Series/ShamelessUS'' is an aggressive, violent character who frequently comes to blows with others, and is typically the dominant partner in sexual encounters outside his relationship with Ian Gallagher. However, in his relationship with Ian, Mickey is notably submissive and has even performed oral sex on command.
* Dean Winchester in ''Series/{{Supernatural}}'' is aggressive and openly tries to take control of situations, often wanting to be the leader. This isn't the case for him in the bedroom, as he is gentle, soft, and very submissive with women. (The opposite of his quieter, more reserved brother, who is actually violent and dominant in bed).

[[folder: Video Games ]]
* In ''VideoGame/MetalGearSolid3'', EVA pursues Snake extremely aggressively from almost the moment she's introduced, and he spends much of the game either trying to [[CelibateHero shove her off him]] or [[LieBackAndThinkOfEngland joylessly enduring her kisses and gropes]]. While she is the one who initiates the eventual sex and takes the lead in the foreplay, there's a point, a little while before the sex actually commences, where Snake suddenly grabs her, pushes her onto her back and powerfully dominates her. Perhaps justified, because their relationship was so physically one-sided up until then that Snake had to show ''extreme'' enthusiasm to establish that their sex scene wasn't just EVA raping him after having broken his spirit with a week-long course of continuous sexual harassment.
* ''Franchise/MassEffect'':
** Female Shepard and Liara have this type of relationship, with Shepard being the aggressive, dominant soldier who instigates (or at least tries to) most if not all her romances ([[SingleWomanSeeksGoodMan Kaidan,]] [[AdventurerArchaeologist Liara,]] [[OfficerAndAGentleman Jacob,]] [[{{Adorkable}} Garrus,]] [[HitmanWithAheart Thane,]] [[ExtremeOmnisexual Kelly,]] [[CelibateHero Samara,]] [[ShipTease Tali,]] [[SubordinateExcuse Joker,]] [[IfItsYouItsOkay Vega]]) while Liara begins as the ShrinkingViolet who squees big if Shepard takes a romantic interest in her. However, [[CharacterDevelopment as she grows in confidence over the course of the trilogy]], the role changes to her being a ViolentlyProtectiveGirlfriend to the [[WorldsBestWarrior galaxy's ultimate badass]] and, as her father points out, it is Liara who throws Shepard on the bed and peels her out of her uniform.
** Male Shepards get Ashley, an ActionGirl who tries to seduce him with poetry, and Jack, a psychotic sexually aggressive BastardGirlfriend. Both relinquish control during a romance. Tali on the other hand is the inverse, a ShrinkingViolet who pounces Shepard during their romance scene.
*** Male Shepard and Ashley are possibly both this from some Citadel DLC dialogue. Shepard can say that he likes it when she takes charge when they're out for drinks. When they wake up after a loud party, he mentions that she gave him some bruises. But, only enough to get his attention.
** Male Shepard himself becomes the aggressive submissive when romancing Kaidan, especially if he's a renegade. While Kaidan is a softspoken, sweet DoggedNiceGuy most of the time, in their romance scene he is the one that pushes Shepard down on the bed and climbs on top of him, and when they wake up, Kaidan is the big spoon. There's also the scene in the Citadel DLC where he agrees that Shepard is the boss... ''except when you're not''. In that case... find him later.
* ''Franchise/DragonAge'':
** Leliana in ''VideoGame/DragonAgeOrigins'' can also come across as this, particularly if hardened, with the culmination of the romance has her basically demanding The Warden goes to bed with her. If she remains softened Leliana is still quite persistent.
** Used a great deal more explicitly in ''VideoGame/DragonAgeInquisition'' where BDSM is a pretty explicit part of the Inquisitor's relationship with Iron Bull, should they hook up. The Inquisitor might be the biggest badass walking the earth, with the authority of entire nations at their beck and call, but is utterly submissive to Bull in the bedroom. They even have a SafeWord. Bull actually refuses to engage in any other type of relationship (with the Inquisitor at least); he reasons that because the Inquisitor has so much responsibility they need some time to let someone else take control, and if the Inquisitor says that's not the case Bull doesn't trust his own judgement enough to safely continue the relationship.

[[folder: Visual Novels ]]
* Akiha Tohno in ''VisualNovel/{{Tsukihime}}'' makes very obvious passes on Shiki (and creeps him out repeatedly) throughout her route, but when it comes to the sex scene, he takes complete control.
* A similar dynamic occurs with Rin Tohsaka (pictured above) in ''VisualNovel/FateStayNight'': throughout the route she's an assertive {{Tsundere}} and TheTease, but in her sex scene she becomes uncharacteristically shy. Once it's over, however, she goes back to her original state, chewing Shirou out for having been too aggressive in bed! It's worth noting that, both in another route's [[spoiler: three-way scene with Saber]] and the scene in the sequel ''VisualNovel/FateHollowAtaraxia'', she acts more like she normally does. This implies that it has more to do with [[TheirFirstTime her inexperience]] and anxiety over being the focus of Shirou's attention (plus [[GagPenis Shirou's... uh... "girth"]]) than CharacterDerailment.
* The ''VisualNovel/{{Danganronpa}}'' character Touko Fukawa repeatedly makes inappropriate advances towards Byakuya which stop just short of stalking (as she will leave him alone if he asks) and falsely claims to be in a relationship with him, yet she aspires to become a dutiful housewife that can fulfill all his needs. This dichotomy bemuses all of the other characters.

[[folder: Web Original]]
* WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic manages to be both a HotBlooded brat who shoots things for catharsis and a sexually submissive ExtremeDoormat who is [[DesperatelyCravesAffection desperate for affection]]. As you might have already guessed, this leads to him getting [[RapeAsBackstory taken advantage]] [[DateRape of over]] and [[InnocentFanserviceBoy over again]].
* WebVideo/AskThatGuyWithTheGlasses is a psychotic rapist, but has proudly bragged of "going down on everyone and everything".

[[folder: WebComics ]]
* Simon in ''Webcomic/{{LeftoverSoup}}'' is an interesting subversion. He comes across as very assertive normally, but is actually totally submissive. Tuesday is S&M day, where one or more of the others in the poly relationship he is part of satisfy his submissive nature and enjoyment of pain. And at the very end they order him to be proactive, assertive, and dominant for the next six days.
** Simon "I'm in assertive mode right now. It makes me incredibly uncomfortable, which is awesome".
* Lisa of ''Webcomic/{{Sunstone}}'' is the submissive in her relationship with Ally. Outside the bedroom, however, Lisa tends to be the more active one in the relationship.
* Jillian in ''Webcomic/{{Erfworld}}'' is an headstrong barbarian warlord and the submissive partner in her relationship with Wanda.
!! Fanwork examples
%% This section is sorted by the original medium of the work the fanfiction is based off. Please try to add only the most popular and/or egregious cases of characters getting this treatment in fanfiction.


[[folder:Anime and Manga]]
* If there's a doujinshi focused on a girl with a dominant personality in canon, not only will she not be dominant, but she'll likely be getting raped or [[{{Netorare}} NTR]]'d. [[BreadEggsBreadedEggs Or both]].
** Sometimes there's even a nasty DoubleSubversion where the girl starts dominant for a few pages to half the doujinshi, then the guy rapes her or something like that. If it's an attempt to pander to both femdom and non-femdom fans, it fails, as the former will be angry at the cop-out and the latter have lots more material that caters fully to them.
** The only notable aversion seems to be ''Manga/HoukagoPlay'' doujins, which often keeps the girlfriend assertive at least[[note]][[AlwaysABiggerFish Unless her club president is involved]][[/note]]. Considering there's no anime and it's unlikely you know about the manga unless you're into feet and dominant girls, it's kind of justified.
** Inverted by the ocassional doujinshi where a ShrinkingViolet or other non-dominant girl becomes a total domme. Note this is much, much rarer than seeing this played straight.
* ''Manga/{{Evangelion 303}}'': [[ShrinkingViolet Shinji]] is quiet, shy and non-confrontational. [[{{Tsundere}} Asuka]] is hot-tempered, stubborn and domineering. Still when [[OfficialCouple they]] make love, Asuka always wants him taking the initiative and being assertive and dominant. And during the Las Vegas trip she teaches him how being a dom.
* ''[[http://www.darkscribes.org/stories/29372 Power Plays]]'' ([[http://web.archive.org/web/20090707173356id_/http://www.darkscribes.org:80/site/html_archive.php?story=442 archived mirror]], NSFW): In this Evangelion [[OfficialCouple Shinji/Asuka]] fanfic [[FieryRedhead Asuka]] is [[{{Tsundere}} dominant]] and [[HeroesWantRedheads Shinji]] [[ShrinkingViolet submissive]]. However Asuka wants to make Shinji more assertive because she has troubles opening up and making herself vulnerable. [[PornWithPlot This is used like a way to make the two of them beginning to discover more about their relationship and each other as their relationship develops and evolves throughout the story]].
* Light Yagami in ''[[WebVideo/DeathNoteTheAbridgedSeriesKpts4tv Death Note: The Abridged Series (Kpts4tv)]]'' is a pretty good example of how he's perceived in fanon. Like in canon he's a SerialKiller who wants to be [[AGodAmI God]] so he is very domineering of the people around him, however when it comes to relationships he almost never comes out on top. This is especially apparent in his [[VillainousCrush pursuit of L]] who he attempts to seduce in FemmeFatale fashion.
* Light Yagami again in the CrackFic ''FanFic/ACharmedLife'', {{Lampshaded}} when Ryuk declares him to be "a natural bottom."

[[folder: Various Media ]]
* Extremely common in {{Yaoi|Genre}} or {{Yuri}} fanworks, whenever characters who are aggressive/dominant in canon get {{wimpifi|cation}}ed for the [[YaoiFangirl writer's]] [[YuriFangirl pleasure]].
* Deconstructed in the (''[[Main/PornWithPlot very]]'' {{NSFW}}) ''Literature/ASongOfIceAndFire'' [[Main/PatchworkFic and]] ''Series/GameOfThrones'' fanfic ''[[http://archiveofourown.org/works/8080903/chapters/18516298 they say he turns into a wolf at night]]'', in which [[YoungAndInCharge Robb's]] extreme sexual submissiveness is presented as a deeply unhealthy coping mechanism he uses to deal with suddenly being forced to take on the power and authority of being Lord of Winterfell, a role he feels deeply unprepared for but also feels is his duty to perform at all times, while simultaneously being left behind by most of his family & support network. Unfortunately, the stress, guilt and cognitive dissonance he feels over his [[TheOldestProfession resulting]] [[AnythingThatMoves behaviour]] only makes him feel more incapable of living up to his responsibilities, leading to something of a vicious circle. [[BreakTheCutie It]] [[SanitySlippage ends]] [[DoomedByCanon badly.]]

[[folder: Video Games ]]
* Many fanworks featuring VideoGame/{{Bayonetta}} fall into this trope. Entertainingly, this was the major complaint the creator had about Rule 34 - not that it existed, but that Bayonetta tended to be in the submissive role, and the fandom actually reacted by making her the dominant one more frequently.

[[folder: Western Animation]]
* The ''WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic'' adult fandom like to portray the tomboyish, aggressive, and competitive Rainbow Dash as a complete sub. If there is an explanation, it's usually that constantly "being awesome" is really stressful, so she unwinds by letting someone else take the reins (metaphorically ''or'' literally). For extra RuleOfFunny, this version of Dash is often paired with the ShrinkingViolet Fluttershy as her domme.