[[caption-width-right:257:[[Theatre/AvenueQ Four years of college and plenty of knowledge have earned me this useless degree.]]]]

->''"It is said that a student at Plato's Academy once asked in frustration 'but how is any of this useful?' Plato expelled the student, but first gave him a copper coin so he could say he gained something from his education."''

Wow, you took ''that'' degree? Ha! [[FutureLoser Well, first your peers will laugh at you for partying instead of studying for a real degree, then you'll find it's completely worthless and work at]] BurgerFool for the rest of your life - [[EvenBeggarsWontChooseIt assuming the Burger Fool will hire you, that is]]. Or [[DrivenToSuicide commit suicide]] rather than [[FateWorseThanDeath that]]. Of course, if you're lucky you can become a mad scientist's experiment or something and at least make a ''name'' for yourself there.

In short, this is a college degree in a subject that is worthless (at least, financially speaking) than the paper it's printed on, and ''much'' less than the cash you paid for it. A common use is to have the guy describe his achievements: "Yeah, graduated top three of my class, BA in Arts, my professors predicting me an easy future and all that. Would you like fries with that?".

Of course, people go to college/university for far more reasons than getting a bigger paycheque at the end of it; in terms of personal fulfilment, a person may gain much from their liberal arts degree. From another angle, many students seeking advanced degrees often accumulate classes that will help them get into a good graduate program but not help them in the job market at that point in time. There are a lot of different majors that are subject to such ridicule, being hopelessly specific or too generic to offer you any advancement. See [[Analysis/ADegreeInUseless Analysis]] tab for more.

Another thing is, even for degrees which seem more useful at the beginning of this century (technical degrees), you frequently '''need''' other subjects as well. You like Informatics, for example? That can be paired with Linguistics (translator engines), Psychology (usable user interfaces, advertisements), Biology (medical devices), Arts (colour theory, computer graphics)Ö and a host of others, as long as you're willing to look for examples. The point is, you'll find almost every study subject is intertwined with others the more complex it gets.
And even if some university degree ''sounds'' useless, it doesn't mean that it actually is (after all, those who actually studied it may know better), or that it will continue to be in the future (the current huge demand for technical degrees may cause humanitarian degrees to be more sought after in the future).

See HardOnSoftScience for when scientists invoke this on other scientists. Related to ClassicallyTrainedExtra. The WorthlessForeignDegree is when you run into trouble not because of ''what'' you studied, but ''where'' you studied. Compare NotThatKindOfDoctor, where people assume you are a physician when your doctorate was in literature.

By the way: In medieval times, alumni of the University of Paris, France got an official license to beg after they finished their studies. So this trope seems to be OlderThanPrint.

'''''This is for cataloguing such examples in fiction. Please do not add real life examples to this page.''''' [[noreallife]]


[[folder: Comic Books ]]
* Comicbook/{{Empowered}} has a degree in suprahuman studies (she always was a superhero FanGirl).
* In ''Magazine/{{Mad}}'', one article says that anyone who can get a four-year degree in Ancient Babylonian Astrology in two years is a genius, but anyone who expects to get a good job with that degree is an idiot.

[[folder: Fan Fiction ]]
* In ''Fanfic/ThoseLackingSpines,'' the HighSchoolAU persona of Larxene (who happens to be a teacher) graduated from university with a doctorate in Philosophy.
-->She was supposed to have gone places with that degree! But no, it's only after you're out in the real world that you learn that nobody knows who John Stuart Mill and Aristotle are, and nobody particularly cares, and you're going to be forced into a meager-paying job in education no matter what you'd previously expected.
* In the ''WesternAnimation/DuckTales1987'' fanfic, ''Fanfic/MotherDearest'', this is Donald's opinion of his sister's Della's efforts in pursuing higher education. He is, admittedly, somewhat biased, since it was while pursuing her courses that she met her good-for-nothing boyfriend, got pregnant with the triplets Huey, Dewey and Louie, got dumped by him, and proceeded to abandon her sons on Donald's doorstep when they were two years old and leave her brother and children to work out looking after them on their own.
* Brought up in the ''FanFic/TheDresdenFillies'' story ''With Great Power''; the father of a missing person named Sean felt that the kid's music degree was not going to get him much in life, and had pressured him into going to college to pursue a more useful subject. Sean didn't listen, and ultimately his father cut him off when he continued to spend money living a lavish rockstar life despite not getting much in return and (as it turns out) not being very talented a musician.

[[folder: Films -- Animated ]]
* Art from ''WesternAnimation/MonstersUniversity'' is a New Age philosophy major.
* The Pixar film ''WesternAnimation/InsideOut'' has this for the clown that gave Riley her fear of them. In the credits we hear his emotions talking about how he spent six years in acting school to be a birthday clown.

[[folder: Films -- Live-Action ]]
* In ''Film/DragonTheBruceLeeStory'', Bruce tells his girlfriend and future wife that he is majoring in philosophy. When asked what he plans to do with his degree, he replies, "Think long, deep thoughts about unemployment."
* This conversation in ''Film/LostInTranslation'':
-->'''Bob:''' What did you study?\\
'''Charlotte:''' Philosophy.\\
'''Bob:''' Yeah, there's a good buck in that racket.
* In ''Film/{{PCU}}'', Droz has the following conversation with students to whom he's selling papers:
-->'''Droz:''' What's your major?\\
'''Sanskrit Major:''' Sanskrit.\\
'''Droz:''' Sanskrit? You are majoring in a 5000-year-old dead language?
* Alluded to in ''Film/TheAddamsFamily'' movie when Morticia is at the employment office. When she tells her case worker that her major was "spells and hexes", the worker nods knowingly and answers, "Liberal Arts."
* ''Film/MrAndMrsSmith2005'', when the Smiths are telling each other their ''real'' [[{{Backstory}} backstories]]:
-->'''John:''' I never went to MIT. Notre Dame. Art history major.\\
'''Jane:''' Art?\\
'''John:''' History! It's reputable.
* In ''Film/TheBrassTeapot'' Aliceís degree in Art History isnít exactly helping her find a job.
* ''Film/{{Ghostbusters 1984}}'': Parapsychology is by and large a useless degree in-universe, with little if any "practical" application. Part of the movie's lasting appeal comes from seeing three guys with "useless degrees" make good outside of the academic world.
* James of ''Film/{{Adventureland}}'' runs into financial problems between his lit major as an undergrad and going to Columbia for journalism. When he starts looking for work, he notes that his degree can't even help him with a manual labor job.
* Averted in the first ''Film/FrancisTheTalkingMule'' film. Army Intelligence goes on a recruitment drive, and one of the volunteers was a professor of philosophy at Duke University before he was drafted, which is considered a plus. (Though it's also worth noting he apparently speaks several languages of the Far East.)
* In ''Film/GoodbyeLenin'', the main character's sister Ariane clearly recognized her studies in (clearly Marxist-Leninist) economic theory would be useless in a country (East Germany) which was turning capitalist... so she quit whilst she was ahead and went and got a job in Burger King!

[[folder: Literature ]]
* Perhaps the cruellest application of this trope is a ''New Yorker'' cartoon showing two English majors whose occupation is ''standing as scarecrows in a field''.
** ''Magazine/{{MAD}}'' once featured a parody of Creator/MelBrooks' ''Film/SilentMovie'', one panel of which featured Marty Feldman doing just that. The caption read, "We found him doing odd jobs...and boy, do we mean ''odd''!"
* In ''Literature/ASongOfIceAndFire'' the Citadel mostly considers the study of magic to qualify, because one of the major lessons is this: magic doesn't work. It's implied that the Citadel is trying to suppress magic, so [[TheMagicComesBack even at the start]] of the series this is less true than they claim.
* In ''WesternAnimation/{{Felidae}}'' (the book), Gustav is an egyptologist, can't find a job, and noone wants to buy his books, so he has to write pornography for cheap magazines to make a living. [[spoiler:In later books, he became more successful.]]
* Creator/JulesVerne's ''Literature/ParisInTheTwentiethCentury'' has a scathing view of the attitudes that produce this trope, [[UnbuiltTrope more than a century before it became prevalent]]. Michel Dufrénoy, the protagonist, is one of the last students of the humanities graduating from his university, which is a cause for shame for his family and endless misery and failure for him throughout the story. Sounds like a straight example at first... except that the story takes ''his'' side, with the rest of French society having pretty much abandoned all creative and artistic pursuits (those that don't involve the LowestCommonDenominator, at least) in favor of an obsessive focus on science and rationality, creating an emotionally cold world to live in. This attitude is treated as a key sign of a {{dystopia}}.
* In ''Literature/TheHitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy'', Trillian explains that she decided to go into space with Zaphod because, with her degrees in Mathematics and Astrophysics, it was either that or back to the dole line (these may have been hard sciences, but highly specialised and, at the time the series was written, would not have given entry in to the general jobs market - the time when a Mathematics degree could get you a highly paid banking job was yet to come).
* This trope features in several stories by German author Heinrich Böll. One of them works at the railroad announcing the station, the other one starts a fruit business after the object of his studies (a Pacific islander people) turns out to be quite different (less romantic) than in his books. Both of them have a [=PhD=] at least.
* In the ''[[Literature/AliceSeries Alice [=McKinley=] Books]]'', her brother Lester eventually decides to switch his college major from business to philosophy. It becomes a [[RunningGag running gag]] of asking what he'll do for a living after. Lester says that he'll "have people pay to climb up a mountain to reach him and ask him for the meaning of life". [[spoiler: He eventually becomes head of personell at the George Mason University.]]

[[folder: Live Action TV ]]
* ''Series/HowIMetYourMother'' has a discussion on long relationships and how when they're over, both have a huge amount of knowledge they will never use. "It's the emotional equivalent of an English degree."
* This is a common gag on ''Series/TheWeakestLink'' when a contestant lists having a maths degree as his greatest achievement.
* One act on ''[[Series/TheGongShow Extreme Gong]]'' was a guy ''eating'' his film school degree.
* Buster Bluth from ''Series/ArrestedDevelopment'' used his family's wealth to become a "professional" graduate student well into his 30s. By the start of the series he has done coursework in cartography, Native American tribal ceremonies, 18th century agrarian business principles, and archaeology. With the ability-level he demonstrated in his archeological dig and just reading maps, it makes sense that he would be guided away from learning skills, e.g., engineering, he could use on a day-to-day basis.
* ''Series/{{Community}}'', being set in a struggling community college, has more than a few jokes about this kind of degree: Britta at one point asks "How many schools would let you get a degree in Theoretical Phys-Ed?"
** A RunningGag is that the school's only alums with money to donate are graduates of the HVAC[[hottip:note: Heating, Ventilation, Air Conditioning]] program.
* In the ''Film/KittenWithAWhip'' episode of ''Series/MysteryScienceTheater3000'', one of the characters on the screen says, "I majored in poli sci. That's political science." Mike, speaking as the main character, retorts, "Oh, so you're unemployed."
** During the short ''The Home Economics Story'', a character in college states that she's majoring in Food and Nutrition, and "I'm going to be a dietrician". Tom Servo comments, "Yeah, right, you're going to be a short-order cook for truckers in two years."
* On ''Series/CougarTown'', Jules is worried that her son Travis won't get a job with his art degree, so she tries to get him a job at the local coffee shop; and when that failed, she tries to scare him straight using his layabout father Bobby as an example.
* The protagonist of ''Big Bad World'' has a Master's Degree in Norse Poetry. The series starts with an ImagineSpot where he is offered a highly paid job where he gets a free car, unlimited funds and is asked by his boss to impregnate his daughter. Cut back to reality, where he is forced to move back in with his parents and finds work on an unpaid graduate programme at his local pub.
* Nodded at in ''Series/LastManStanding'', Vanessa has a Masters in geology and admits that her career choices are either energy companies or teaching.
* [[InsufferableGenius Sheldon]] on ''Series/TheBigBangTheory'' considers pretty much every degree that isnt in a hard science subject to be this, and even worse if you dont have a PhD on top of it.

[[folder: Music ]]
* Music/WeirdAlYankovic, in his song ''Skipper Dan'', about a theatre prodigy working on a Disneyland Jungle Cruise ride:
-->I should've listened when my grandfather said\\
"Why don't you major in business instead?"
** In interviews, Al has also noted that his masters in architecture is effectively one, given how seldom it ever comes up for him.
* Music/KanyeWest references this trope in his song ''All Falls Down'':
-->I promise, she's so self-concious\\
She's got no idea what she's doing in college\\
The major she's majoring in don't make no money\\
But she won't drop out, her parents'll look at her funny
** Useless degrees are actually a recurring theme in Kanye's "College Trilogy" albums. One series of skits focuses on a man who spends his entire life enrolled in school and earning degrees without actually getting a job to earn money, causing his family to fall into poverty.
* Music/MitchBenn's "Once We Made Planes":
-->We would work and toil amid smoke and oil,
-->With our buddies.
-->Now we all sit at home with our useless diplomas,
-->In media studies.

[[folder: Newspaper Comics ]]
* In one ''ComicStrip/{{Dilbert}}'' strip, it was mentioned that problems with blackouts are due to the lights being cued to motion detectors, and the office workers weren't active enough to keep them on. Thus, an intern was hired to walk around flapping his arms all day: "Another journalism major enters the workforce."
** A minor running joke is that other than the engineers there is no correlation between degree and job. The boss is an art history major, while the secretary has an MBA.

[[folder: Other]]
* The Unseen University degree available from the Literature/{{Discworld}} Emporium comes with a list of "Indefinite Studies" (essentially optional courses) that students must choose from to gain a well-rounded education. It specifically notes that UU does not consider sports, art, drama, or "medium studies" to be academic pursuits.

[[folder: Radio ]]
* ''Radio/APrairieHomeCompanion'' has a whole weekly skit devoted to [[http://cms.cerritos.edu/english/english-majors mock advertisements]] for the [[http://prairiehome.publicradio.org/programs/2010/06/12/scripts/english.shtml Professional Organization of English Majors]], in which things happen and [[ThisLooksLikeAJobForAquaman only an English major]] can stop them. [[AlwaysMale He always]] gets the girl in the end of the advertisement. So this trope is at least 25 years old. ([[AuthorAppeal Garrison Keillor majored in English in college.]])

[[folder: Theater ]]
* ''Theatre/AvenueQ'''s song "What Do You Do with a BA in English?" Reprised at the end when it turns out what you do with a BA in English is [[spoiler:help run a monster school]].

[[folder: Video Games ]]
* Humourously referenced in ''VideoGame/{{Paradigm}}'' where the makers of [[DesignerBaby designer babies]] boast that their children will never waste their parents' money on liberal arts degrees.
* In ''VideoGame/TheSims2'' with the ''University'' expansion pack, each university major gives a boost in several career tracks. The career tracks tied to the English degree include "Slacker" and "Criminal". Also, the final semester for Philosophy majors is "Senior Project: Preparing For The Fast Food Industry."
** ''VideoGame/TheSims3: University Life'' continues to make fun of people whose degrees didn't involve test tubes or coding, even before your Sims takes the course. In the Aptitude Test your Sims can do to get a head start in university, the traits that will get you ahead in the Communications degree all traits that have more to do with charming and manipulating people than applying skill or actually, y'know, reading books or studying. It's also linked to the closest thing to a Slacker career path the game has: Fortune Telling. Meanwhile, the actual Bookworm trait, which you would ''expect'' to line up with an interest in Communications subjects, instead gives you an advantage in only the ''Science'' career. In a twist, though, the much maligned Fine Arts degree has the most "flattering" set of traits overall, and is linked to three fairly lucrative careers.
* In ''VideoGame/TheSimpsonsGame'', Bart and Lisa are at one point attacked by players from the ''VideoGame/MaddenNFL'' series (ItMakesSenseInContext). Lisa taunts them:
-->'''Lisa''': ''Your communications degrees are a joke!''
* This is one of [[{{Meganekko}} Beatrice]] [[HollywoodNerd Trudeau]]'s greatest fears in ''VideoGame/{{Bully}}'':
-->'''[[https://youtu.be/nYBHga3-xTI?t=318 Beatrice]]''': ''My fear is that I'll end up working in a bookstore when I'm 30 because all I have is a Master's degree from some Liberal Arts college!''

[[folder: Web Comics ]]
* Wil from ''Webcomic/QuestionableContent'' has a Liberal Arts degree. Previously an aspiring poet, he eventually got a job as a barkeep in order to keep his girlfriend, Penelope. He even composed a poem about the situation, titled "The Rime of the English Major".
-->It is a [=McDonald's=] cashier,
-->and he stoppeth one of three.
-->"By thy patchy beard and glittering eye,
-->wherefore earn'st thou a Liberal Arts degree?"
** [[http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=728 Same comic, same degree, different character.]]
*** Though Tai is later revealed to be studying Library Science.
* According to [[http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=2029#comic this]] ''Webcomic/SaturdayMorningBreakfastCereal'' strip, the best way to make a theologian angry is to ask, "Could God make a degree so useless, even ''he'' couldn't get a real job?"
** An earlier strip had a convenience store that stocked Liberal Art Degrees next to Particularly Low Brand of Toilet Paper. They got a lot of complaints. From the toilet paper vendors.
** Subverted in one strip that points out the Nr 1 reason to get a degree in English: because Science is incredibly difficult and boring if you dont have the aptitude or interest for it.
* One of the doomsday cultists in ''Webcomic/EightBitTheater'' reveals that he's a psychology major.
* Not so much a Useless Degree as an Absurdly Narrow One, Bob in ''Webcomic/TheInexplicableAdventuresOfBob'' has a degree in newsstand management.
* Similarly, [[Webcomic/PennyArcade Tycho]] apparently has a degree in [[http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2006/1/27/ pig waxing]] (the [[AuthorAvatar real-life]] Tycho didn't attend college).
* In ''Webcomic/{{xkcd}}'', [[HardOnSoftScience every single figure in the strip who doesn't/didn't study engineering, mathematics, physics (string theorists still get slammed though), chemistry, or computer science falls into this.]] However, he did spoof this kind of thinking with one strip: [[http://xkcd.com/1052/ Every major's terrible]].
-->-'''AltText''': Someday I'll be the first to get a Ph.D. in Undeclared.
* In ''Webcomic/TheDragonDoctors'', Elka reveals that the reason she became an assassin was to pay off the abnormally large debts she accumulated when she got ''four'' useless degrees, one after another, and realized none of them could pay the bills.
* A minor character in ''Webcomic/SchlockMercenary'' apparently studied "comparative Gal-West lit, with an emphasis on memetic Terranism" before she started working fast food. Thanks to a complicated series of events she eventually becomes cook's assistant in the protagonists' mercenary company, which is probably a step up.
** One of the mercenaries has a degree in "Xenokillology" he made in a custom major program, bringing in all sorts of biology and anthropology courses. He realized after he got his job that all he really needed to know was "shoot it a lot."
*** Though he does put it to use, sort of, when the company desperately needs a xenobiologist and he's [[ClosestThingWeGot the closest they have]].

[[folder: Web Original ]]
* In the Podcast/{{Rifftrax}} for ''Film/JurassicPark'', during the opening scene, Mike comes out with this gem:
-->'''Mike''' (as a guard): "I shouldn't have majored in Sociology."
* In ''WebVideo/BiteMe'', Greg's marketing degree has gotten him a job spinning signs on the street.
* To cement the difference between WebVideo/TheNostalgiaChick and Lindsay (her smarter and nicer actress), the former obliviously holds up a certificate that actually says "Extortion University awards you a useless degree in film".
* In Season 2 Episode 4 of ''WebVideo/MisadventuresOfAwkwardBlackGirl'', J has an ImagineSpot about if she accepts a job offer to be a sales associate at Walmart. In the fantasy, an old college friends sees her and tells her child, "This is where people who major in African-American studies end up."
* ''Website/{{Cracked}}''
** The article "[[http://www.cracked.com/article_19990_4-important-lessons-you-learn-as-birthday-party-mascot.html 4 Important Lessons You Learn as a Birthday Party Mascot]]", which begins with the assumption that being a birthday party mascot is one of the few plausible choices that Liberal Arts graduates who took Creative Writing as their major could take.
--> There comes a time in every man's life when he finds he's lost his way, or maybe he just never had much of a grasp on it in the first place, because he is a 22-year-old liberal arts graduate and no one is immediately handing him a job for some reason.
** One of the entries in "[[http://www.cracked.com/article_19517_6-mind-blowing-discoveries-made-ebay-other-wtf-places.html 6 Half-Assed Ways Scientists Made Mind Blowing Discoveries]]" is about a newly discovered jellyfish that "can't swim, they can't sting, and their anus is wrapped around their brain. Genetically it's a jellyfish, but physically it's a disappointment, so it's possible that they were simply hiding out of shame." The caption underneath a picture of said jellyfish?
--> "Above: the liberal arts major of the sea."
* In ''Webanimation/CampCamp'', counselor Gwen, who in a certain episode is shown to have been rejected in just about every other job application, is a Liberal Arts major. Minoring in Psychology, which one of the kids says is equally useless but at least helps her assess the mental health of the other counselor, David.

[[folder: Western Animation ]]
* In ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'' episode "Faith Off," Dr. Hibbert tells injured star football player Lubchenko that his playing days are over:
--> '''Hibbert:''' But you can always fall back on your degree in... (''reads chart'') Communications?! Oh, dear Lord!
--> '''Lubchenko:''' I know! Is phony major. Lubchenko learn nothing. Nothing!
** Kent Brockman:
--->"Things aren't as happy as they used to be down here at the unemployment office. Joblessness is no longer just for Philosophy majors - useful people are starting to feel the pinch."
** The Comic Book Guy:
--->"I have a Masters Degree in Folklore and Mythology!"
* In the ''WesternAnimation/{{Futurama}}'' episode "Crimes Of The Hot", a civil defense van is calling all scientists to a global warming conference:
-->'''Homeopathic Doctor:''' I have a degree in homeopathic medicine.
-->'''Civil Defense Van:''' You've got a degree in baloney! [Hoses down doctor]
** Doubles as self-deprecating humor as said scientist's degree was from the Evergreen State College, Creator/MattGroening's alma mater.
* Averted in ''TheCritic''. Jay Sherman has a PhD in Film, but is a fairly well-respected critic with two Pulitzer Prizes and several broadcasting awards to his name. However, while his work is high-quality, he doesnt rate very highly among the viewers, who dislike his superior tone and caustic treatment of beloved actors and movies.
* Dr. Orpheus from ''WesternAnimation/TheVentureBrothers'' has a degree in Communications with a minor in Women's Studies, both from a community college. As for his "[[NotThatKindOfDoctor doctorate]]", he claims it was given to him by "a higher power".
* As in the Film example above, ''WesternAnimation/ExtremeGhostbusters'' briefly touches upon this in the first episode-- Eduardo thinks it's going to be an easy A.
* ''WesternAnimation/TheFairlyOddparents'' episode "You Doo" features a guy who majored in French philosophy. This guy happens to be the elementary school's janitor. (He also apparently put a lot of his money into Internet stocks, but that's neither here nor there.)
* ''WesternAnimation/TransformersPrime'' uses a mixture of this and WorthlessForeignDegree, Ratchet is the medic and scientist and is extremely talented in treating his fellow Autobots. On occasion he makes mention of potential health concerns for the Autobots, not realizing human don't have to worry about things like rusting. When Raf is injured Ratchet nearly has a breakdown, admitting that despite close contact with the humans he never bothered to study their biology and thus had no idea what to do.
* Season 3 of ''Archer'' had a one-shot character named Noah who appeared in the season premiere two-parter, an anthropology doctorate candidate who had been captured and enslaved by a pirate crew when they hijacked his research vessel, and ends up becoming Archers interpreter. Both Archer and Riley (the freelance agent Malory hired to find Archer) make fun of him for his degree, with Archer confusing it for Arachnology and Archeology, and Riley pointing out that his only job prospect will be teaching other anthropology students.
* It's debatable if he has a degree in it or not, but it's uselessness can't be debated considering Jerry from ''WesternAnimation/RickAndMorty'' majored in civics and it's gotten him absolutely nowhere.
--> '''Beth:''' Jerry, majoring in civics was your mistake. Don't punish us for it.

[[folder: Jokes]]
* The Science major asks, "Why does it work?" The Engineering major asks, "How does it work?" The Liberal Arts major asks, "Do you want fries with that?"
* Q: What's the difference between someone with a BA in English and someone with a BA in Theatre?\\
A[=:=] The one with a degree in English says "Would you like fries with that?". The one with the Theatre degree says "[[WaitingForABreak Good evening, I'll be your server tonight]]. The special of the evening is Medallions of Wild Boar in a Cranberry-Dijon Reduction, served on a bed of Ramps sauteed..."
* Q: Which of these is not like the others? A Ph.D. in Mathematics, a Ph.D. in Theoretical Mathematics, a Ph.D. in Statistics, or a large pepperoni pizza?\\
A[=:=] [[spoiler: [[BaitAndSwitch A Ph.D. in Theoretical Mathematics]]. The others can feed a family.]]
* Friendly reminder to STEM majors: be nice to Liberal Arts majors. After all, [[NiceToTheWaiter they'll be serving your food]].