''Sisters... No Way!'' is a novel by Irish author Siobhán Parkinson. It's told uniquely in the form of two diaries kept by two teenage girls. Cindy is a fifteen-year-old only child whose mother has just died of an illness. She's actually adjusting pretty well to it until her father starts dating one of her teachers. The teacher in question has two daughters of her own, sixteen-year-old Aishling and fourteen-year-old Alva. We read the diaries of Cindy and Aishling and get their views on how their lives change as their parents eventually marry and the families are forced to move in together.
In case you didn't get the parallel with Cindy's name and the plot, it's sort of a modern take on ''Cinderella'', of course, without the poverty and toe-cutting.
!!This novel provides examples of:
* ActuallyPrettyFunny: Cindy gets drunk during dinner and starts telling stories about the girls in her class. Aishling's narration states that Margaret found these stories very funny, probably because she knew all the girls.
* AlcoholicParent: Aishling and Alva's father Philip is implied to be this.
* AlphaBitch: Cindy's classmate Emma. She even at one point asks if Margaret sleeps in her mother's bed.
* BitchAlert: Aishling and Alva have this reaction when they first meet Cindy.
* BlondesAreEvil: Alva, the bratty fourteen-year-old. Averted with Margaret and Aishling, who are also blondes.
* BrattyHalfPint: Alva, even though she's fourteen.
* ByTheHair: During an argument at the breakfast table, Aishling grabs Cindy by the hair to calm her down. Cindy does something similar to Emma earlier in the book.
* CatFight: Emma, one of Cindy's classmates, mocks Cindy for Margaret marrying her father. When she asks if Margaret sleeps in her mother's bed, Cindy loses it and attacks her.
* ChristmasCake: Margaret. Richard is her first actual relationship since she split with Philip who has been with Naomi for at least three years.
* CoolBigSister: Richard's sister Imelda, though she's more of this to Cindy.
* CrocodileTears: Cindy uses these in her classes to avoid having to do complicated work. This backfires when she gets sent to the guidance counselor, and thus the story begins...
* DefrostingIceQueen: Cindy and Aishling towards each other. The end of both diaries have them civil enough to each other.
* DramaticIrony: If you read Aishling's diary first, then you'll immediately realize that [[spoiler:Robbie, the guy Cindy meets in a bar, is her ex]]. If you read Cindy's first, then you'll clue in when he phones the house.
* EveryoneLovesBlondes: Aishling. She's pretty, popular, gets straight As and has a cute boyfriend.
* HardDrinkingPartyGirl: Cindy's best friend Lisa.
* IdiotBall: Aishling finds a pregnancy test in the bathroom bin and immediately assumes that it belongs to Alva, her fourteen-year-old sister, as opposed to Margaret, who's in an actual relationship.
* InSeriesNickname: All the teachers at Cindy's school have them. At first everyone calls Margaret "Milly-Molly-Mandy" and then Cindy starts calling her "The Bay Tree" after her hairstyle.
* LadyDrunk: Cindy, actually, when she first has dinner with Margaret and her daughters. Cindy actually passes out at the table.
* TheLostLenore: Cindy's dead mother for her father.
* MaybeEverAfter: Cindy and [[spoiler: Robbie/Bob]]. They do hit it off and could possibly see each other again. However it's doubtful considering Cindy is living [[spoiler: with his ex]].
* MeaningfulName: Cindy - a young girl who gets a stepmother and stepsisters. Her last name is Ellis too. (Cindy Ellis = Cinderella).
* MissingMom: Cindy's mother died and the story starts just after her funeral.
* PerspectiveFlip: The two diary accounts.
* ProperLady: Cindy views Aishling as a modern example, referring to her as "Miss Prim".
* PunnyName: Margaret Magee - Maggy Magee, Lampshaded by Cindy who wonders why her parents would call her that. Turns out it's her married name.
* SheCleansUpNicely: Aishling has this reaction when Cindy comes over to dinner for the second time. The first time she wears jeans and dirty shoes but the second time she wears a dress, does up her hair and puts on a lot of makeup. Ultimately subverted as Aishling thinks she overdid it.
* ShesGotLegs: Aishling has this reaction when Alva wears a short skirt. "[Alva] has a nice figure, she should show it off a bit more".
* SiblingYinYang: Aishling is composed, mature and refined while Alva is loud, obnoxious and a complete brat.
* SlobsVersusSnobs: Played with in regards to Bob/Robbie's choice of "snob" Aishling vs "slob" Cindy. Aishling is actually poorer than Cindy but is a lover of classical music and literature while Cindy is a more stereotypical teenager.
* SpellMyNameWithAnS: Discussed by Cindy. Her mother apparently wanted it to be spelt "Cyndi" but her father stopped her.
* TerritorialSmurfette: Suggested with Cindy towards her father.
* UncannyValleyMakeup: Aishling reacts this way to Cindy's make-up at the second dinner. "Her make-up made you want to run for a face cloth".
* WeddingDay: Richard and Margaret. Cindy doesn't go to the wedding at first but turns up at the end.
* WhatTheHellHero: The first line of Cindy's diary. She takes offense to someone suggesting that her mother's death was a "happy relief". Her father explains he meant as in a happy release from the pain of her mother's illness but Cindy still finds it rude.
* WhenSheSmiles: Margaret's smile is her best feature. At one point Aishling notices how old she looks but then Margaret smiles and she relaxes. Cindy remarks "she's not a very attractive woman but she does have a nice smile".
* WildTeenParty: Averted. Aishling has a birthday party at the house and it turns out more like a formal ball than anything else.