!!General logic-chopping

* Pinocchio says, "Something supernatural is about to happen to my nose." What happens?
** His nose becomes shorter.
** His nose turns green.
** Depends on if he's already told a lie. If he hadn't, then nothing supernatural was happening at that moment. It would be happening immediately after he lied.
* Pinocchio says: "God does not exist". Would his nose grow? Does his nose grow when he *knows* what he's saying is a lie, or if he speaks a lie, regardless of his knowledge about it?
** Saying something that you don't know if its true or not isn't telling a lie.
** People generally lie to cover their own ass, so I agree with the above poster. You can't lie about the existence of God unless you've actually spoken with Him face-to-face in some supernatural encounter and then afterward said he does not exist.
*** In the early chapters of the original novel, Pinocchio's nose grows when he is in stressful situations that do not involve lying. This supports the covering-his-behind theory.
** For that matter, could you use him to further academic research? Like, if you asked him to say "the Riemann hypothesis is correct" and then checked to see if his nose grew or not. Or, hell, can you use him to help determine policy decisions? "Will policy x lead to desired result y? Please answer yes or no."
** I imagine Pinocchio's lie-detecting nose is based on whether or not he thinks he's lying. So, if you told him 'Pinocchio, two and two make five', and he believed you, then later on if you asked him what two plus two is, and he said 'five', his nose wouldn't grow because he wouldn't know he was lying. It wouldn't predict the future or anything like that.
*** I bet many people wish they could curse their local [[{{AcceptableProfessionalTargets}} politicians]] with a lie-detecting nose. Hey, if [[http://www.mail-archive.com/ctrl@listserv.aol.com/msg24210.html it could happen to President Clinton]]...
** Depends on if he believes in God.
* What if Pinocchio says "[[LogicBomb I am lying]]"?
** His nose grows in reverse and stabs him in the brain.
** Alternatively, [[{{YourHeadAsplode}} his nose explodes]] [[NightmareFuel and splinters fly everywhere.]]
** Magic noses don't care about math. Humans ''can'' believe A^-A without their head exploding. This also lends support to the above theory that Pinocchios nose grows only if Pinocchio himself thinks he says a lie. The above foul tricks didn't work in the [[GodelEscherBach Achilles vs Turtle]] duels either.
** Nobody [[IncrediblyLamePun knows.]]

!!Disney movie

* Pinocchio spends a decent chunk of the movie walking underwater with no ill effects. Then he drowns. What the!
** He doesn't drown. He died of the fatigue of being CHASED BY A GIANT WHALE. That, and he might have hit his little wooden head on the rocks or something.
*** He did get washed up on the beach, perhaps all the massive waves crashing around and battering his body knocked him out?
**** Warranty of Pinocchio's Magitek Battery expired at that moment?
*** The waves knocked him against the rocks and gave him severe brain damage.
** Pinocchio was half-donkey when he escaped from Pleasure Island. Maybe he was still continuing to change, but the process had slowed down considerably the further he got from the island. When he was wandering around underwater, he was still puppet enough to not need air, but by the time they all escaped from Monstro, he had finally become donkey enough to drown.
* I know this is pendanic but...if Geppetto wanted a son, why didn't he just go to a nearby orphanage and request the caretakers to bring him a boy for him to adopt?
** Two reasons: He was old. And what if said real boy was a brat? Geppetto wanted to make his own son the way he envisioned him. Plus, you don't have to feed and clothe a puppet so there's that bonus!
** Maybe he wasn't rich enough.
** "Well I was going to go-a to the orphanage in da morning, but the Blue Fairy brought my little Wooden Head to life and save-a me a trip! MUSIC PROFESSOR!"
* Why was the coachman willing to pay so much for Pinocchio?
** It wasn't Pinocchio specifically; the coachman was using that sack of gold to wow Honest John into finding some boys for him. Sort of a "You think that's good payment? Work for me and you'll get THIS!" deal. Honest John finding Pinocchio for this purpose was pure coincidence.
*** Okay, but then why was he willing to pay that much for ''anybody''? Does selling a donkey really bring him more money than that sack of gold?
**** One possibility is that he is a supernatural figure (which would explain why there are roller coasters in the 19th (?) century), so it's not really about doing business for him.
***** The roller coaster isn't the head scratcher. That would be the Ferris wheel, which was invented after the book's publication. Course, this is the Disney movie we're talking about....
*** There's no reason to assume the offer was a sack of gold for one boy. A sack for a hundred, now that's plausible.
***** For that matter, it's very possible that not ''all'' the coins are actual gold; there's probably more then a few gilded lead ones in there. Why shouldn't the Coachman cheat a cheater?
**** You, my friend, are one very smart troper.
* What happened to all those performers working for Stromboli? You know, the ones controlling the puppets and doing their voices.
** [[InferredHolocaust Burned to death]] or [[WhatHappenedToTheMouse used the catwalk-ladder adjacent stage exit, if there was time]].
* Why did Geppetto let a naive wooden boy go out on his own when he didn't even know how to get to the school? Seems like he never would have gotten into any trouble if he hadn't have a criminally neglegent parent.
** The man is pretty absent-minded, so maybe it just didn't occur to him. Also, maybe he assumed Pinocchio would just follow the other kids who were heading off towards the school as well.
*** Pretty much this. All the other children were running to school without parents, so it's probably just how it's done (particularly if the village is as small as it seems).
* How can Pinocchio eat/digest food if he has no internal organs due to being a puppet?
** [[AWizardDidIt A Fairy Did It]]
** Or wood golems, being plant-based, could digest the same way as the overgrown Venus fly-trap [[Theatre/LittleShopOfHorrors Audrey II]]: "Feed me, Gepetto!"
** He has wooden internal organs.
** For that matter why is it treated as such a big deal that Pinocchio starts smoking and drinking on Pleasure Island? I mean as a puppet he doesn't have real lungs, liver, or a cardiovascular system so those things shouldn't hurt him right? I can understand the lesson they're trying to push and Disney not wanting a main character to smoke/drink but it's still kinda silly.
* Did it bug anyone else when they were under the ocean, Jiminy got caught in a bubble, and tried to keep his head above water as it filled up with water... but they were breathing water the whole time??
** RuleOfFunny . That's literally the only reason for that tiny part of the movie to exist, to make a joke out of the whole breathing underwater thing and to [[Lampshade]] it as well. "Yes, we are aware it doesn't make sense for Jiminy to be breathing underwater. Deal with it."
* This didn't occur to me until [[FridgeHorror many years later]]. What's with the Blue Fairy lecturing and essentially torturing Pinocchio for "lying" about what how he ended up in Stromboli's cage? On his ''first day of existence'', he had been conned, kidnapped, and sold into slavery. If a, say, 5-year-old child were abducted and put in a similar situation on their first day of school, and in terror made up a story like what he said, would your first inclination be to lecture them about lying, while mutilating their body? Considering Gideon and Foulfellow probably would have used violence if Pinocchio had not consented, what he was saying was not that far off from the truth. Yes, it's meant to be [[AnAesop a moral for the audience]], but in context that scene is actually pretty disturbing. Unlike in the book, there is no indication that Pinocchio is actually guilty of the vices he has to "overcome", or of anything other than naivete.
** Pinocchio even refers to Honest John and Gideon as "two big monsters". From his point of view, that could be what they were!
*** This is why his nose doesn't actually start growing until he says, "With big green eyes." Also, you can tell from the tone in his voice that he's lying.
** She clearly felt she had to get through to him about the importance of honesty somehow, and the growth of his nose isn't shown to be painful, but it is awkward and embarrassing, leaving him in tears. She fixes him after he promises to try to do better.
* How does Pinocchio pick up the ability to speak language from the first minute after he is alive?
** The same way he picks up being able to move around without muscles, can smoke, and gets intoxicated (and can actually drink ''period'') despite being made of wood. AWizardDidIt.
** This is a case of something we'd have to set aside. A wooden puppet boy manages to act like a regular human being despite having no muscles or internal organs to help him digest or anything. We may as well argue why in Star Fox, there are humanoid animals piloting starcrafts. It's a part of the story. :)
** He has a wooden brain and larynx.
* Really really stupid, but - did Figaro ever get to eat his fish? Geptto says that they won't eat till he finds Pinocchio, after all. It looked so delicious and he was stuck watching it go cold for hours! Poor Figaro.
** After the movie ended, he got a bigger, more delicious fish.
* So, after releasing Pinocchio from the cage, the Blue Fairy said she can no longer help him.... then later flies down (in dove form???) to drop him a note that tells him the whereabouts of his father? Wha???
** Maybe she meant "helping him" in terms of direct supernatural intervention (i.e. her magic). Informing someone where their "[[{{TrulySingleParent}} father]]" is (depending) usually is a mundane thing, VoluntaryShapeshifting notwithstanding...
** Really she was just giving him a tip - after all, Pinocchio had no idea where to go.
* This may seem really minor, but in the latest release of Pinocchio, during the song "Give a Little Whistle" they cut out certain phrases. Not even dirty phrases, they're Jiminy saying "Right!" and "Look out Pinoke!" Why?! For what purpose, to what end, why would those phrases need to be taken out?!
** It's probably just a remastering error.
** It was edited by a chimpanzee.
* Why did Gepetto bring Figaro and Cleo with him to look for Pinocchio? I can understand Figaro might have followed at his own accord, but why is Cleo there? Wouldn't looking for a kid be hard enough without dragging pets around?
** Geopetto brought them along because he didn't want them to starve in case he was gone for a month.
** He didn't want to be alone, I guess.
* Figaro is a [[IntellectualAnimal non-anthropomorphic]], black and white kitten (normal animal or IntellectualAnimal depending on his appearances) and Gideon is a light brown, [[TheSpeechless mute]], FunnyAnimal cat. If Figaro were an adult cat, [[AnthropomorphicShift would he be a]] FunnyAnimal like Gideon or [[EpicMickey Ortensia]], a CivilizedAnimal like [[WesternAnimation/ChipNDaleRescueRangers Fat Cat]], an AnimalTalk type Talking Animal with CivilizedAnimal moments like TheAristocats, a TalkingAnimal like [[Disney/AliceInWonderland The Cheshire Cat]], an AnimalTalk type TalkingAnimal like [[Disney/{{Bolt}} Mittens]] or [[LadyAndTheTramp Si and Am]], an IntellectualAnimal like Lucifer from {{Disney/Cinderella}} or a normal animal like Fluffy from HandyManny?
** Probably just an IntellectualAnimal like the fish. Whether he uses AnimalTalk depends on the viewer, since some animals (like [[WesternAnimation/TomAndJerry Tom]]) vary between TheSpeechless and a TalkingAnimal DependingOnTheAuthor. On one hand, he doesn't show any signs of becoming anything else when MinnieMouse owns him, so he could be full-grown but of a small breed. On the other hand, ComicBookTime. Anyway, if he was the kitten form of a FunnyAnimal like Foulfellow or Gideon, that would have the UnfortunateImplications of {{Funny Animal}}s being considered saves or pets, since Gepetto treats him like a pet instead of a child and doesn't consider him to be a candidate for sonhood.
* Jiminy Cricket is a cricket, but he looks half like a rabbit (he looks like he has a nose just like a real rabbit) and half like a human (but without the ears of either or the tail of the former).
** He was originally supposed to look more like a real cricket.
** Maybe he hated his original appearance, and asked the Blue Fairy for help.
*** No, because when he first sees the Blue Fairy, his comment implies that it's the first time he ever saw a fairy.
* Wait a minute... Why can't the Blue Fairy help all those kids who were donkeyfied?
** They never wished upon a star.
** They didn't have a conscience.
*** To break up the funny comments:
---> 1. Despite being very powerful, the Blue Fairy can't be everywhere at once. She had to come down from the sky to help Pinocchio (except for the end, but she might've gone by the shop and gone back to the sky)
---> 2. Who says she didn't eventually? Just because we never see it doesn't mean it didn't happen. It just isn't relavent to Pinocchio's story (like showing whether or not Gideon, Honest John, or the Coachman ever are punished)
---> 3. Pinocchio is an unusual case, being created from wood, by the Blue Fairy herself. It may be the case that fully human children have different types of guardians, (angels?). Maybe the others are set free another way.
** One theory about the Coachman is that he's sort of the Blue Fairy's opposite number. Whereas the Fairy rewards good deeds, the Coachman punished bad ones. So the two basically don't interfere with each other's work, or are forbidden from doing so. And while Pinocchio is essentially innocent, and keeps screwing up because he is naive, trusting, and inexperienced, the other boys knew what they were doing is wrong. Not that this justifies [[DisproportionateRetribution what happens to them]].
* How can Monstro be sleeping at the bottom of the ocean? He's a mammal! Even as a kid that confused me. (For some reason, Jiminy's SuperNotDrowningSkills didn't, though.)
** He was just resting after a gulp of air (and presumably, a good meal).
** He was faking. Note that he opens his eyes as soon as a school of fish swims by, implying that he was laying in ambush for a meal.
* In the novel, Stromboli was moved by Pinocchio's tears and pulled a HeelFaceTurn. Why didn't Disney allow him to do the same in the movie? [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot It would have demonstrate that not every bad guy is unredeemable!]]
* This was brought up in a tongue-in-cheek article on io9, but what exactly is the business plan with Pleasure Island? You give kids candy and cigars and all these other temptations, and they turn into donkeys you put to work in a mine. But there are already donkeys that you can buy pretty cheap. And real donkeys are probably better behaved than little boys who were transformed because of their lack of discipline.
** Judging by the amount of donkeys we see, and boys on the island, they make profit through the sheer amount of donkeys they sell.
** It's entirely possible that the Coachman isn't even really human, but is instead a demon disguising itself as human. And assuming that's the case, would it be at all reasonable to assume he'd be interested in something as material and easily-lost as monetary wealth when he could get an endless emotional high out of causing misery and pain to young boys just for the pure dick factor? That's right. The Coachman is probably a demon who is psychologically tormenting boys and turning them into donkeys just to be an [[JustForPun ass]], and any money he could possibly be making is entirely just for show.
*** The money incentivizes people like the Fox and the Cat to collect stupid little boys for him.
* Where are Ghepetto's shoes when he and Pinocchio are trying to escape Monstro? They reappear when they make it home. Where'd they go?
** Maybe Ghepetto had another pair at home?
* Since, during the Pleasure Island sequence, Pinocchio isn't yet a "real boy," how does he end up turning into a donkey and being sold? He's still wooden, right? And boys--flesh-and-blood children--are the ones being turned into donkeys. So what's the deal here? Do Honest John and Gideon simply not care he's a puppet? (Although if you buy into the Coachman-is-a-demon theory, I suppose that's exactly what's going on).
** I know it doesn't square with the apparently flesh-and-blood ears and tail he sprouts, but as a kid, I imagined him turning into some kind of life-size toy donkey or a rocking horse or something.
** That actually makes sense because some life-size horses or donkeys do have realistic hair, tails, or ears--or at least they used to back when the movie was made. Rocking horses in particular would have tails made from real horsehair, which you could take as *FridgeHorror.
** Would being made of wood make a difference? Pleasure Island was shown to turn bad little boys into flesh-and-blood donkeys regardless of what they started out as. We know that magic can turn wood into flesh in this setting, so it isn't a stretch that Pleasure Island was capable of it.
*** [[YourMindMakesItReal His mind made it real]]. I, Prime Evil, have it in mind that it's not so much the misbehavior ''itself'', but the emotion, the ''thrill'', of misbehaving that eventually turns the boys into donkeys. The idea is for the boys to get so caught up in themselves that they won't notice the transformation, but Pinocchio's own good nature made him self-aware enough to notice the transformation and stop himself at just a tail and ears.
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