* Not that I look for lemons most of the time, but I hate running into a bunch of them looking for romance. I also hate that out of all the parings I support I only run into them for one of my 'ships. And there always PlotWhatPlot. Kigo apparently has a good following why can't I run into one for them? Or Ash and Misty?
* I don't mind sex in my fanfic, but what annoys me about the more explicit varieties is the tendency a lot of writers have to use really creepy, weird euphemisms, and that's why I avoid lemons as a rule. I once unwittingly stumbled across an ATLA lemon where someone's penis was described as his [[http://piandao.org/screencaps/ep4/ep4-1072.png Unagi]]... [[FetishRetardant Ewwww.]]
** I'll see your Unagi and raise you a [[Fanfic/ForbidenFruitTheTempationOfEdwardCullen massive throbbing gigglestick.]]
*** And then there's the purple-headed womb ferret.
*** Massive and throbbing should not be used in the same sentence as gigglestick ever nor should the term gigglestick exist. Also someone referred to a penis as a purple-headed ferret?
* How come I can't find Lovey dovey lemons? With sweet love making.
** Because [[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3046172/1/A_new_meaning_to_the_term_brotherly_love there's no such thing as]] [[BlatantLies lovey-dovey lemons]]
** Allow me to present [[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2776386/1/Truth_Love_and_Justice Exhibit B]]. Also an example of a lemon fic with an actual plot involved, showing that there are good ones out there.
** They exist, all right. They're just rather hard to find among the bad ones.