The movie:

* The one-strap/two-strap backpack thing.
* "You have the right to...to suck my ''dick'', motherfucker!"
** "I did read him his rights. I did a version of that."
*** Also the apparent need to scream "FUCK YOU!" after every arrest
*** Jenko and Schmidt getting even with the One Percenter by dry-humping him then teabagging him. Schmidt celebrates their arrest by firing his gun in the air, sending bystanders scurrying for cover.
* Captain Dickson's rant about being an AngryBlackMan stereotype.
** Pretty much everything he says is hysterical.
* Jenko messing with Schmidt during his phone call.
* Schmidt's DelayedReaction to getting stabbed during a fight.
-->"When did I get stabbed?"
* Jenko's chemistry quiz.
-->Question: How is a covalent bond different from an ionic bond?
--->a) YOU'RE AN IDIOT.
--->b) NO, I'M NOT.
--->c) YEAH YOU ARE, DUMBASS.
--->d) FUCK YOU, QUIZ.
* After taking HFS, Jenko returns to class and writes on the whiteboard, while high.
-->"One particle of {{Unobtanium}} has a nuclear reaction with a [[Film/BackToTheFuture flux capacitor]]; carry the 2, changing its atomic isotoner into a [[Franchise/SpiderMan radioactive spider]]!" *turns around, revealing he's written the number 4 all over the whiteboard* "Fuck you, science!"
** The shot during the credits is equally funny, where instead he just wrote the word "BOOBS" in gigantic letters.
* The car chase which lampshades the EveryCarIsAPinto trope throughly.
** And the scene right before, where Jenko and Schmidt steal a driving school's car; the teacher tries to stop them before abruptly giving up, muttering, "Oh, who cares?"
* [[spoiler:The coach getting his dick shot off and [[{{Squick}} trying to pick it up with his teeth]].]]
* Schmidt and Jenko getting high. First, they promptly try to get rid of HFS before it gets into their system by shoving their fingers in ''each other's'' throats to force a vomit reflex, but wind up having to go to class altered beyond belief. HilarityEnsues.
** Or more importantly, the screen cap for the last stage of "FUCK YEAH, MOTHERFUCKER!" to whomever is on the stuff.
* "We weren't fingah-poppin' each otha's eessho's"
* After Schmidt and Jenko throw a wild house party at Schmidt's parents' house as part of their cover, Mrs. Schmidt completely freaks out at them; at one point during her rant, she states that "I used to party with RobertDowneyJr. ''before'' he got sober! When he was REALLY fucked up! And FUN!"
** Hell, Schmidt and Jenko planning the party. They realise they'll need beer & comment that they'll need fake I.D.s to do so; cue uproarious laughter from the two since they're both over 21. Then they realise they'll need drugs & comment that they'll need to find a dealer; cue uproarious laughter from the two since they know a way to get a shit-load of drugs for free -- raid the evidence lock-up for several large bags of pot.
** Jenko initially goes for cocaine, but Schmidt shoots it down: "We're trying to show them a good time, not ruin their fucking lives!"
* Schmidt praying to Korean Jesus for help and getting yelled at by Dickson for wasting Korean Jesus' time.
* "HAVE SOME FAIRY DUST MOTHERFUCKER!"
* The "ZZ Top" biker [[spoiler:turns out to be Hanson, played by JohnnyDepp himself!]]
* Schmidt and Molly walk in on a girl-boy-girl threesome, with the guy in the middle. When they walk out, Molly starts laughing and asks, "What was the girl in the back doing?"