* Frank's and Elsie's first meeting on the train:
--> '''Frank''': My name's Frank.
--> '''Elsie''': That's a terrible name.
--> '''Frank''': ''(shrugs)'' It's the only one I've got.
--> '''Elsie''': Perhaps we can find you a new one.

* Frank's attempts to invite Elsie to dinner.
--> '''Elsie''': Invite me to dinner, Frank?
--> '''Frank''': What?
--> '''Elsie''': ''(gives him a look)''
--> '''Frank''': Would you like to have dinner?
--> '''Elsie''': Women don't like questions.
--> '''Frank''': Join me for dinner.
--> '''Elsie''': Too demanding.
--> '''Frank''': Join me for dinner?
--> '''Elsie''': Another question.
--> '''Frank''': ''(thinks for a moment)'' I'm having dinner, if you'd care to join me.
--> '''Elsie''': ''(smiles at him)''

* When Frank sees Elsie in her evening wear.
--> '''Frank''': [[PrecisionFStrike Fuck.]]
--> '''Elsie''': ''Gives look''.
--> '''Frank''': You're ravenous.
--> '''Elsie''': Do you mean 'ravishing'?
--> '''Frank''': I do.
--> '''Elsie''': You're ravenous.
--> '''Frank''': I am.

* When the two thugs are trying to break into Frank's hotel room and he calls the reception for help.
--> '''Frank''': ''(into the phone)'' Hello? Please help!
--> '''Concierge''': ''(answering phone)'' Buongiorno, signore.
--> '''Frank''': Buongiorno- I, I need help! There are two men trying to break down the door...
--> '''Concierge''': I see, what kind of problem do you have with the door, sir?
--> '''Frank''': No, no, no! There are two men with guns trying to break in! Dos hombres, con... con pistolas!
--> '''Concierge''': Your Spanish is excellent, sir.
--> '''Frank''': Thank you...
--> ''(The thugs start to shoot out the door lock)''
--> '''Frank''': Ah, I gotta go! ''(Frank drops the phone and exits through the window)''
--> '''Concierge''': Sir? ''(slams down the receiver)'' American!

* Frank's constant use of Spanish instead of Italian is pretty funny in just about every instance.
--> '''Frank''': ''Gracias.''
--> '''Policeman''': *{{Beat}}* ''De nada.''

* Fleeing his would-be assailants, Frank runs along rooftops, leaps across a gap to an awning, and dashes through a crowded marketplace... in his pajamas. The chase ends when he runs into a policeman (literally), and is promptly arrested. (Yes, the whole sequence is ''very'' reminiscent of Jack Sparrow.)

* After Frank narrowly escapes the two thugs.
--> '''Policeman''': You wish to report a murder.
--> '''Frank''': Attempted murder.
--> '''Policeman''': That's not so serious.
--> '''Frank''': Not when you downgrade it from murder. But when you upgrade it from room service, it's quite serious.

* Right after Shaw strangles an incompetent minion with a measuring tape.
--> '''Shaw''': ''(checking new suit in mirror)'' Does it look all right?
--> '''Bodyguard''': ''(nervous)'' Yes. Like always.
--> '''Shaw''': What's always?
--> '''Bodyguard''': Very good.
--> '''Shaw''': Yes, I think it looks all right.

* Shaw referring to Alexander's stealing millions of dollars from him.
--> You know, Alexander was like a son to me. I loved him. That brilliant, playful, disrespectful young bastard. I even thought that he and I were two of a kind. Oh, I took great pleasure in never knowing what this man would do next. Until one day what he did next didn't give me any pleasure at all.

* At the end, as the two are escaping on a boat.
--> '''Elsie''': Twenty million dollars worth of plastic surgery and that's the face you choose?
--> '''Frank''': You don't like it?
--> '''Elsie''': ''(smiles)'' It will do.