* Ellie's completely out-of-the-blue attempts to learn how to whistle.
-->'''Ellie''': (''starts blowing extremely hard'')
-->'''Joel''': Are you alright?
-->'''Ellie''': I'm trying to learn how to whistle.
-->'''Joel''': You don't know how to whistle?
-->'''Ellie''': Well, does it sound like I know how to whistle?
** Then, later on...
--->'''Ellie''': (''starts whistling successfully, then gasps, then whistles again'') I'm whistling! (''continues whistling'')
--->'''Joel''': [[SarcasmMode Oh, good.]] [[MostAnnoyingSound Something else you can drive me crazy with.]]
** Doubly funny because players might be startled by Ellie's initial attempts at whistling, not realizing it's her and not some monster.
* After meeting Bill:
-->'''Ellie''': We're here because you owe Joel some favors, and you can start by taking these off! (''referring to handcuffs dangling from her wrist'')
-->'''Bill''': I owe Joel some favors... is this some kind of joke?
-->'''Joel''': I'll cut to the chase: I need a car.
-->'''Bill''': Well, it is a joke. Joel needs a car! Well, if I had one that works, which I sure as hell don't, what makes you think I'd just give it to you? Huh? "Yeah sure, Joel, go ahead, take my car! Take all my food too, while you're at it!
-->'''Ellie''': [[DeadpanSnarker By the looks of it, you could lose some of that food.]]
-->'''Bill''': (''points knife at her'') You listen to me, you little shit-
-->'''Ellie''': No, fuck you! You handcuffed me!
* When Bill asks what was Joel's job:
-->'''Bill''': What are ya deliverin', the little brat?
-->'''Ellie''': Ha ha. Fuck you too.
-->'''Bill''': (''[[ActuallyPrettyFunny suddenly cracks up]]'')
* One of Ellie and Bill's banter while they're looking for a car to fix:
-->'''Ellie''': [[TheWatson So...why don't you fix one these cars?]] (''referring to the mass of broken down cars'')
-->'''Bill''': [[SarcasmMode Oh my God, you're a genius. I mean the whole time, why on earth hadn't I thought about fixin' one of these cars?]]
-->'''Ellie''': Okay, don't be a dick...
-->'''Bill''': The tires are rotten and the batteries are dead.
* While Bill and Joel load shotguns in the former's armory, Bill notices Ellie touching a pile of magazines (when he explicitly told her in the beginning of the cutscene not to touch anything), resulting in this exchange.
-->'''Bill''': Hey! What did I say to you when we walked down the steps?! What did I say?!
-->'''Ellie''': [[HilariousInHindsight I'm just]] [[BlatantLies fixing your stupid pile!]]
-->'''Bill''': [[PunctuatedForEmphasis Don't. Touch.]]
-->'''Ellie''': (''sighs, then [[FlippingTheBird flips Bill off]]'')
* GameplayAndStorySegregation kicks in when Bill storms around the infected and then tells you to be quiet.
* This exchange, after [[spoiler: almost getting killed looking for a car that has already been scavenged for parts]].
-->'''Bill''': Somebody had the same idea, [[spoiler: they stole my shit]].
-->'''Joel''': Well, then what the hell is Plan B?
-->'''Bill''': You should be thankful you're still drawing breath! That was Plan A, B, C, all the fucking way to Z!
* After leaving Bill's town, Ellie reveals she "borrowed" some things from Bill:
-->'''Ellie''': I'm sure your "friend" will be missing this tonight. (pulls out gay porn mag) Light on the reading, but it has some good photos.
-->'''Joel''': Now Ellie, that ain't for kids.
-->'''Ellie''': Woah! How the-- ''How the hell would you even walk around with that thing?!''
-->'''Joel''': Get rid of that. Just--
-->'''Ellie''': Hold your horses, I wanna see what the fuss is about. ''Why are these pages stuck together?''
-->'''Ellie''': ''(laughs)'' I'm just fucking with you!
** [[AllWomenAreLustful Just the fact one of the things she borrowed is a gay porn magazine, really.]]
* "I really miss coffee."
* Ellie reading a joke book filled with the most terrible puns to Joel. He actually groans throughout it.
** And then there's one pun that he actually finds pretty funny.
** Oh let's not kid ourselves here, most of those puns are gold.
* Joel, Ellie, Henry and Sam finding an ice cream truck. When told what it is, Ellie has a hard time believing it.
-->'''Ellie''': You're totally fucking with me!
* After seeing Sam and Ellie play darts, Joel can have a throw too. [[spoiler: After much build up, he hits the wall.]]
* After solving a puzzle, Ellie demands a high-five for "Teamwork!" and there's actually a button prompt to do it. Take the prompt for the rare and wondrous sight of a man using his whole body to convey an eyeroll.
* Joel's exasperation at Ellie's selection of their horse's name:
-->'''Joel''': What kind of name is Callus, anyway?
* The sniper's log at Eastern Colorado University records people being let in and out. The entry for October 31:
--> 10 million werewolves IN. ''(Let 'em in just for you, Andrea. Happy Halloween!)''
* "Once we clean up this mess we're gonna have a town meeting and put his leadership up to vote." The civility of the line in context makes it ARareSentence gold. [[spoiler: While hunting Ellie one of the cannibals says this about David.]]
* When Joel finds Ellie [[spoiler: on the operating table with a surgeon attempting to fend off him with a scalpel,]] it is possible to throw a brick at his face... only that he ignores the brick entirely, even through it breaks apart on his face.
* The... "[[ExactWords alternate ending]]" to the game. [[spoiler:The director told Marlene's actress to sing her lines in what was originally the game's final cutscene. Creator/TroyBaker took it completely in stride and began to sing with her.]] See [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0oSFFSu57yU here]].
* There's a bit of dark humor when Tess and Joel confront Robert [[spoiler:after Robert tries to kill them both]].
-->'''Robert:''' Tess. Joel. No hard feelings, right?
-->'''Tess:''' None at all. *Picks up a metal pipe*