* After some trepidation, Joel works up the nerve to call Lana's number.
** While wearing a football helmet to protect himself. ''During the phone conversation''.
*** And gives Lana a false name, so that when she comes to the house and walks seductively into the living room, she breathlessly asks:
-->'''Lana''': Are you ready for me... Ralph?
* Joel's [[EroticDream dreams]] that turn into nightmares:
-->'''Joel's Mom''': Please Joel, just get off the babysitter!
* When Joel returns home counting the huge wad of cash earned from the wild party, he finds Guido has stolen every bit of furniture there. Cut to Joel angrily calling Lana's number to find Guido waiting with an offer.
-->'''Joel''': No, no NO! YOU listen to ME, you... A-hole!
-->''Guido hangs up''
-->''Joel curses as he redials the number''
-->'''Guido''' (answers the phone, slightly annoyed): A-hole?
* Guido's first words of wisdom to Joel: "Let me give you a little advice so you know. In times of economic uncertainty, ''never '''ever''' fuck with another man's livelihood''. Go have fun, now? You know fun, [[CatchPhrase time of your life]]? Maybe if you follow that, I won't have to come back here."
* "Who's the U-Boat Commander?"
** With a cutscene of the Porsche's door opening to let half of Lake Michigan out.
* Barry not knowing the difference between "Bopping" and "Fucking".
** [[spoiler:They mean the same thing.]]
*** And it's the ''virgin Joel'' who has to explain it to him.
* Miles does not enjoy being involved in a possibly deadly car chase with a gun-wielding pimp:
-->'''Miles''': I don't believe this! I've got a trig midterm tomorrow, and I'm being chased by Guido the Killer Pimp.
* Joel's [[DragQueen first call girl.]]
* ''[[RiskyBusinessDance "Just take those old records off the shelf..."]]''