* "Addison, my God!" "Isn't that redundant?"
* "That man belongs in a pound..." "Pound of what?" *Maddie-glare*
* "You're a wanton woman! A woman who's wantin'!"
* The Dr. Seuss bit from "The Murder's In The Mail":
--> '''David:''' We're looking for a man with a mole on his nose.
--> '''Maitre'D:''' Mole on his nose?
--> '''Maddie:''' A mole on his nose!
--> '''Maitre'D:''' What kind of clothes?
--> '''Maddie:''' (to David) What kind of clothes...?
--> '''David:''' (to Maitre'D) What kind of clothes do you suppose?
--> '''Maitre'D:''' What kind of clothes do I suppose would be worn by a man with a mole on his nose? Who knows?
--> '''David:''' Did I happen to mention, did I bother to disclose, this man that we're seeking with a mole on his nose?/
--> I'm not sure of his clothes or anything else except he's Chinese, a big clue by itself.
--> '''Maddie:''' How do you do that?
--> '''David:''' [[LampshadeHanging I got to read a lot of Dr. Seuss.]]
--> '''Maitre'D:''' I'm sorry to say, I'm sad to report, I haven't seen anyone at all of that sort./
--> Not a man who's Chinese with a mole on his nose with some kind of clothes that you can't suppose./
--> SO...get away from this door and get out of this place/
--> Or I'll have to hurt you...put my foot in your face.
--> '''David:''' Oh..!
--> '''Maddie:''' Time to go!
--> '''David:''' Time to go! *hasty exit*
* David-as-Petruchio in "Atomic Shakespeare," particularly his first line:
--> '''David-as-Petruchio''' (to a buxom village girl): ZOUNDS! What MOUNDS!
** After doing a huge Shakespearean speech, David slides down his sunglasses and tells the camera "Didn't think I could pull it off, didja?"
** The entire [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WprhxGjq6_c "Good Loving" number]].
* At the very end of Maddie's "It's a Wonderful Life" parody, the writers threw the audience a bone. Maddie backs David up against a desk and says, "you" as if she's mad, but then she shoves him down on top of it and ''kisses him passionately.'' David looks at her, baffled, and says, "Where'd that come from? {{Beat}} Ah, who cares?" ''(kisses her passionately)''
* The scene of David trying to get Maddie to look like she belongs in a bar, culminating in him singing "Doo Wah Diddy" as she swings her hips.
* The fact that Bruce Willis seriously sings in every single episode, even if it's just a line or two.
* When Maddie goes into his office one day to find he went on a bender the night before and the cab driver ''hung him from the hook on the back of his door.'' Even he's confused when he wakes up as Maddie pulls him off of it.
* Most of David's fourth wall breaks are well timed and absolutely hilarious.
* When the interviewer shows up at Maddie's door to talk about their "show" and Maddie goes back in her office, then returns with some gauze to hold over her face to make fun of the cinematographer's tendency to film only Maddie in a soft, partially unfocused glow.
* Maddie returns to the office unexpectedly...only to find that David has initiated a game of ''strip poker'' with his coworkers. David's "oh shit" reaction really sells it.
* It's very hard not to crack a smile at Agnes many, many rhymes to try and get new clients over the phone.
* When David gets a hold of a rolodex with very famous people on it, he naturally goes nuts. How nuts? ''He dials up the fucking Pope as well as the President of the United States.'' And it's perfectly in character for him, no less.
* Their reaction to their first real kiss is oodles of hilarity. Maddie asks "what was that" and David, in all his idiocy, replies, "um...what was what?" "What was that, what we just did there, what was it?" "I dunno. I didn't do it." They both just jump headfirst into denial and it's so ''them'' to do so.