* Baroness, while herding a woman out of an elevator at gunpoint: "Nice shoes."
* Baroness again: after her Hummer gets blindsided by a train, as she pushes the driver's corpse out of the wreckage: "Next time, I'll drive."
* "Did it work?...Good. Because I think I'm about to be arrested. Again."
** Pretty much every line Ripcord says falls under here.
** He IS played by Marlon Wayans, after all.
** Nevermind his lines, just the shocked look on his face when Storm Shadow cuts his pistol clean in two.
* This exchange:
-->'''Breaker''': "Finding [=McCullen's=] base is gonna be harder than finding [[{{Malaproper}} a needle in a coal mine]]."
-->'''Ripcord''': "You mean haystack".
-->'''Breaker''': "Oh, right. ''Haystack'' in a coal mine"
** Also this exchange:
-->'''Duke''': "I told you to [[ReadTheFreakingManual read the manual]]."
-->'''Ripcord''': "There's a manual?!"
* Bypassing the MARS base's security system:
-->'''Breaker''': "What you'll have to do is rewire the laser panel's brain by—"
--> ''Snake-Eyes stabs the panel.''
-->''' Breaker''': "—or you could just stab it..."
* Ah, the joys of TemptingFate:
-->'''Baroness''': "He (Snake Eyes) gave up."\\
'''Storm Shadow''': "He [[{{Determinator}} NEVER]] gives up."\\
''[[RammingAlwaysWorks Cue their Hummer getting hit by a train]]''
** Also counts as a MythologyGag (or WaxingLyrical[=/=]TitleThemeDrop), referencing the lyrics of the animated ''GIJoe'' cartoon title theme.
* Speaking of Storm Shadow:
--> '''Zartan''': (after knifing Cover Girl) Oh, that's right. [[WouldntHitAGirl You don't kill women.]]\\
'''Storm Shadow''': For you, Zartan, I'll make an exception.
* Joseph Gordon-Levitt's performance as The Doctor/[[spoiler:Cobra Commander]] is hilarious, delivering his lines with just the right combination of nonchalance and camp. He steals the entire film.
--> '''The Doctor''': Consider it done. The Joes will never know what hit them!
* The COBRA underground machines in the desert leave obvious dirt tunnels right out of a Bugs Bunny cartoon.