* "My name is Gregory Goyle and I smell." Written next to the entry on [[AllTrollsAreDifferent trolls]] for bonus points.
* The book's intro talks about how wizardkind sought to differentiate between "beings" and "beasts", with the first classification of a "being" being anything that walks on two legs. This subsequently leads to chaos at a meeting of all these "beings": trolls smash the place up, hags look for children to eat, and Augureys make a huge din. Ultimately, the wizard in charge of opening the meeting [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere runs cursing from the hall]] after slipping on some Porlock dung.
* This conversation scrawled on the first page:
-->'''Harry:''' This book belongs to Harry Potter.
-->'''Ron:''' Shared by Ron Weasley because his fell apart.
-->'''Hermione:''' Why don't you buy a new one then?
-->'''Ron:''' Write on your own book, Hermione.
-->'''Hermione:''' You bought all those Dungbombs on Saturday, you could have bought a new book instead.
-->'''Ron:''' Dungbombs rule.
* And of course Janus Thickey's "last words", a scribbled note saying:
-->"Oh no, a Lethifold's got me, I'm suffocating"
** And later it turned out that he was actually [[spoiler:having an affair with a local barmaid]]. Naturally, his wife was not pleased.