* Debra and Gina blithely observe Lucas chase shoplifter Warren around the store:
-->'''Gina:''' Isn't it customary to *leave* the scene after committing the crime?
-->'''Debra:''' Definitely an amateur.
** Followed by Gina's announcement to the customers:
-->'''Gina:''' Attention Rex Manning fans, to your left you will notice a shoplifter being chased by night manager, Lucas. This young man will be caught, deep fried in a vat of hot oil and served to our first hundred customers. (''laughs'') Just another tasty treat from the gang at Empire Records.
* Gina wearing [[NakedApron Music Town apron]]. "I think Music Town is torn on the whole 'revealing clothing' issue."
** Even funnier is Lucas trying to cover Warren's eyes while Gina is dancing, and Warren pulling away.
* Debra and Gina's SnarkToSnarkCombat:
-->'''Debra:''' No visible tattoos.
-->'''Gina:''' No revealing clothing.
-->'''Debra:''' We're both screwed. At least you're used to it.
-->'''Gina:''' Oh now, Debra, don't be bitter, surely with your ever growing collection of flesh mutilating silver appendages and your brand new neo-nazi boot camp makeover the boys will come a-runnin'.
* [[MushroomSamba "You play a mean guitar, Mark! It's really a shame that you must...DIE!"]]
** And of course, Mark's [[ActuallyPrettyFunny reaction]] to seeing himself devoured on stage.
* "Empire Records, we're open till midnight, this is Mark... ({{Beat}}) ''midnight''."
** Doubly funny for anyone who has ever worked any Customer Service/Reception position involving such a canned phrase... or who has ever called such a business only needing to know the business hours.
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