* "I am looking for a gorgeous blonde named C.J."
** "I've never met this guy in my whole life!"
* From the episode "Premiere" after the kids have accidentally walked in on the parents...well you know
---> '''Paul:''' You could have knocked.
---> '''Kerry:''' It's seven in the morning. I thought you couldn't do anything until you had your first cup of coffee.
---> '''Bridget:''' Yeah, there's already one baby. What are you trying to do, make twins?
---> '''Kerry:''' [[SarcasmMode Yeah, that's how it happens]]
** And earlier in the episode:
--> '''Bridget:''' (''notices Kerry wearing her earrings'') First you steal my popularity and now my earrings?
--> '''Kerry:''' You forgot about your boyfriend.
--> ''[[CatFight Bridget screams and jumps on top of Kerrie]]''.
* In one episode "Pauland" his family is invited to a famous athlete's house for dinner so he can write a book about him when he's talking about how he'll rent a suit, Kerry and Bridget run down the stairs as Bridget gives Kerry a wedgie. Paul's response?
---> '''Paul:''' Can you rent kids?
* In one episode, Bridget, Kerry, and EVEN C.J. calls Grandpa Jim whenever they get scared.
-->''[A scary-looking guy stares at her/them/him and bought something for her/them/him.]''\\
'''Bridget/Kerry/C.J.:''' ''[get cellphone out]'' Grandpa, I'm scared.
* While Cate is performing "Daddy's Girl" in a Heartwarming Moment in a bar one guy buys Kerry a beer. Cate gets down off the stage, takes the beer away and shakes her head at the guy ''without stopping singing''.
* Cate trying to cheer her sister up after a divorce:
--> '''Cate:''' Taking a bath always makes me feel like a new woman.
--> '''Maggie:''' Ted found a new woman.
--> '''Cate:''' I meant when I'm taking a bath, I'm always a nude woman.
--> '''Maggie:''' I found Ted with a nude woman.
--> '''Cate:''' You know, it's probably best not to dwell on Ted.
--> '''Maggie:''' I found Ted with a nude woman in a dwelling.
* "Rory Hennessy doesn't serve cold lasagne!"
* From the very first episode:
--> '''Paul:''' I'm mad at something you said.
--> '''Cate:''' What?
--> '''Paul:''' Let's start a family.
--> '''Cate:''' Well you're the one that wanted to keep going until we had a boy.
* Kerry is forced to avoid being sarcastic and so Paul wears a hideously patterned sweater to annoy her.
--> '''Kerry:''' Mom, I'm going to write something down on a piece of paper and I want you to say it to Dad.
--> '''Paul:''' If it's sarcastic, you're still out.
--> ''Kerry crumples up the piece of paper''
* Cate has just discovered Kerry has pot in her school bag (while Rory kidnapped a police dog and Bridget is dating a guy with a motorcycle).
--> '''Cate:''' I'm just trying to figure out what's happening to my good child.
--> '''CJ:''' The thief, the druggie or the biker chick?