* [[SoundtrackDissonance "That's the way / Uh-HUH-Uh-HUH / I LIKE it/ Uh-HUH-Uh-HUH..."]]
* It may have crossed the line twice, but firing at and killing several [[{{Mooks}} assailants]] while doing [[CoitusUninterruptus his special oil check]] on the lady in the motel AND drinking scotch was nothing short of side-splitting.
** This is also hilarious later on when the shell-shocked waitress is trying to explain what happened to the cops.
* The Accountant's very first line in the film.
-->'''The Accountant:''' You, fat fuck.
** When the first stoner reacts to him bursting from his overturned car.
-->'''Teen #1:''' Jesus!
-->'''The Accountant:''' [[LiteralMinded Carpenter.]] And, despite what you've heard, prefers short hair.
** And when he is addressing the two stoners.
-->'''Teen #2:''' You almost fucking killed me, man!
-->'''The Accountant:''' Not even close. I won't see you again until you're 73. (''looks over at the other guy'') You I'll see in three months.
-->(''he walks away'')
-->'''Teen #1:''' What does that mean?!
* This exchange between the Accountant and one of the cultists after the former notices the latter's pentagram tattoo:
--> '''Accountant''': What's that?
--> '''Cultist''': A symbol of our pact with Lord Satan.
--> '''Accountant''': A pact, huh? Funny -- he's never mentioned you.
--> (''looks at the Cultist's shattered legs'')
--> '''Accountant''': Whoa, those are fucked!
* After the Accountant interrupts the police trying to apprehend Milton and Piper (thereby allowing them to escape), he whips out his coin, tosses it and it becomes a FBI badge which he shows to the police captain, and we get this exchange:
-->'''Captain''': No goddamn way! Ain't no goddamn way in God's good heaven are you an FBI agent!
-->'''Accountant''': Gentlemen, I need you boys to stand down. Captain, you know what this badge means, right? Federal Bureau of Get-the-Fuck-Out-of-My-Way! You boys just stumbled onto an ongoing investigation.
** The Accountant then exposes one of the cops as a cultist working for King and tells him to call him. When the cop/cultist does, the Accountant leans in close to hear.
* "If your definition of 'forever' is the next five seconds, then you'd probably be right."
* The Accountant's reaction when Piper gets free and grabs the Godkiller.
-->'''Accountant''': Well!