!! ''Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure''
* The classroom session:
-->'''Bill:''' He's dead?
-->'''History teacher:''' So what you're telling me, essentially, is that Napoleon was a short, dead, dude?
-->'''Bill:''' Well, yeah.
--> [...]
-->'''Teacher:''' Ted, who was Joan of Arc?
-->'''Ted:''' Noah's wife?
--> [...]
-->'''Teacher:''' It seems to me the only thing you've learned is that Caesar is a "salad dressing dude."
** What caps it off is Ted's later question: "Well, then, who ''was'' Noah's wife?"
* Bill and Ted's roundabout conversation at the beginning.
-->'''Bill''': Ted, while I agree that in time our band will be most triumphant, Wyld Stallyns will never be a super band until we have Eddie van Halen on guitar.
-->'''Ted''': But Bill... I do not believe we will get Eddie van Halen until we have a triumphant video.
-->'''Bill''': Ted, it's pointless to have a triumphant video before we even have decent instruments.
-->'''Ted''': Well, how are we gonna get decent instruments when we don't even really know how to play?
-->'''Bill''': That is why we ''need'' Eddie van Halen.
-->'''Ted''': And ''that'' is why we need a triumphant video!
-->'''Both''' (beat): Excellent! (Air guitar)
* The entire "Gathering the Troops" (historical figures) scene.
** Espcially Khan and Lincoln.
-->'''Bill:''' Wanna twinkie?
* All the historical figures cleaning house, especially [[FreudWasRight Freud and the vacuum cleaner]].
** Complete with the fake aliases. "Bob Genghis Khan" may be the funniest phrase ever said on film.
** Not to mention the historical figures running amok at the mall, especially Joan of Arc's jazzercise session and Genghis Khan's sporting-goods rampage.
** And Billy the Kid starts shooting just for the fun of it, followed by Socrates joyfully trying to imitate him with a little dart gun.
---> '''Billy''': Yee ha! (fires a shot into the air and runs off)
---> '''Socrates''': Yee ha! (fires a ''toy'' shot into the air and gives chase)
*** Socrates carries a ''lethal'' squirt gun.
** Billy The Kid and Socrates hitting on women and Freud tries to butt in. He is then called a geek.
*** Freud is holding a corn dog while they're conversing with the girls. He [[GettingCrapPastTheRadar lowers it when the girls start laughing at them]].
--> '''Freud''': What is a geek?
* The historical figures' time in jail.
* Bill and Ted facing the "Royal Ugly Dudes" in medieval England.
-->'''Royal Ugly Dude:''' Put them in the iron maiden.
-->(''the Princesses gasp'')
-->'''Bill and Ted:''' Music/IronMaiden? Excellent! (''they do an air guitar riff'')
-->'''Royal Ugly Dude:''' Execute them!
-->'''Bill and Ted:''' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck Bogus...]]
* The historical figures' oral presentation. Most notably, ''Ted'' calls out on Napoleon's strategy (regarding the use of a "Water-slide" aka [[HistoricalInjoke Waterloo]])

!! ''Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey''
* Bill and Ted explaining why their girlfriends/fellow band members are able to play better than they themselves.
-->'''Ted:''' ...they started in the fifteenth century.
-->'''Ms. Wardroe:''' What do you mean?
-->'''Ted:''' Well, they're from medieval England.
-->'''Bill:''' ''(hissing)'' Ted, ''shut up.''
-->'''Ted:''' Uh, Medieval England... ''Iowa.''
* Bill and Ted [[ChessWithDeath play Death]] and beat him, with surprising ease, [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wNzqf8a3mbc first at Battleship, then Clue, then Electric Football, and finally Twister.]]
-->'''Bill:''' [[BestOutOfInfinity Best of seven?]]
-->'''Death:''' [[SoreLoser DAMN RIGHT!]]
* Death to the smoker at the hardware store: "See you real soon."
* From the SpinningPaper Montage: 'Death Wins Indy 500; "I didn't know I could run that fast."'
* B&T Melvining Death, of course. Made even funnier in the comic adaptation with this follow-up.
-->'''Ted:''' Bill?
-->'''Bill:''' Yeah?
-->'''Ted:''' Death wears funny shorts.
* [[spoiler: The Good Robot Usses decapitating the Evil Robot Usses is funny in itself, but the fact that the Evil Robot Usses are so nonchalent about it makes it hilarious.]]
* De Nomolos's {{Mooks}} seizing control of a room using typical action-movie-thug poses and body language, dressed in standard-issue paramilitary black ... and giant floppy black boots made of polyethylene foam, which are apparently all the rage in their time.
* This inversion of IfYouDieICallYourStuff:
-->'''Bill:''' Ted.
-->'''Ted:''' Yeah?
-->'''Bill:''' If I die, you can have my Music/{{Megadeth}} collection.
-->'''Ted:''' But, dude, we're already dead.
-->'''Bill:''' Oh. Well then they're yours, dude.
* (to Satan) "You know, you got a bad rap, but you're actually an ok dude."

!! ''Bill and Ted's Excellent Comic Book''
* Death enjoying himself at Bill & Ted's playground.