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[[quoteright:320:http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/rsz_vlcsnap2011012622h45m38_4496.jpg]]
[[caption-width-right:320: A little late to call [[GhostBusters the boys in gray]] now.]]

'''''[=Thir13en=] Ghosts''''' is the 2001 [[TheRemake remake]] of the 1960 film '''''Film/ThirteenGhosts'''''. Arthur Kriticos (Tony Shalhoub) finds himself as a heir to a elaborate glass mansion after his uncle Cyrus dies. The mansion turns out to be harboring a sinister purpose, as the in-house machinery starts moving the glass walls that are inhabited by the eponymous ghosts, held in check by Latin phrases etched in the panels.

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!!This remake contains the examples of:

* AllThereInTheManual: The DVD extras for the remake gives the background of each of the ghosts and how they fit into the Black Zodiac.
* AndIMustScream: Ghost #2, the Torso, who is a naked man chopped into three pieces (torso, head, and legs) and wrapped in plastic. Extra information shows this is how he died.
%%* AssholeVictim: [[spoiler:Ben Moss.]]
%%* AxCrazy: The Jackal.
* AnAxeToGrind: The Great Child carries an axe.
%%* BaldOfEvil: The Hammer and the Great Child.
* BatterUp: The Torn Prince carries a baseball bat.
%%* BeardOfEvil: [[spoiler: Cyrus]].
* BigDamnHeroes: When The Jackal is attacking Kathy, [[spoiler: Kalina]] arrives to help.
%%* BigFancyHouse
* TheBigGuy: The Juggernaut. He stands at seven feet tall and is so strong that, in life, he could tear people apart with his ''bare hands''.
%%* BlackEyesOfEvil: The Angry Princess' eyes.
* BlessedWithSuck: Dennis Rafkin is a medium with the ability to detect ghosts and and instantly read minds through physical contact. He also has no control whatsoever over his powers and they tend to give him seizures.
%%* BloodFromTheMouth
* BloodlessCarnage: You would have thought a person being cut to pieces would cover those directly below in blood.
%%* BrattyHalfPint: Bobby.
* BulletTime: Brief slow motion effects are shown randomly in the early parts of the movie.
* CassandraTruth: Arthur has hard time believing Dennis' warnings about the ghosts at first.
%%* ChainedByFashion: The Hammer.
* ChairmanOfTheBrawl: Arthur attempts to break the glass surrounding the house with a chair.
* ChildByRape: How The Dire Mother got her child.
%%* CleanCut: "Did [[spoiler: the lawyer]] split?"
%%* ClosedCircle
* ClothingDamage: When Kathy's attacked by the Jackal, her clothes are torn to shreds. This becomes FridgeHorror if one learns of [[RapeIsASpecialKindOfEvil the Jackal's backstory]]...
%%* CouldntFindAPen: The Angry Princess' suicide note.
* CreepyBasement: It's literally filled with ghosts!
* CreepyChild: Ghost #1, the First-born Son, who is dressed as a cowboy with an arrow through his head and carries a tomahawk around. Played oddly with the Great Child, who isn't an actual child, but is a huge, 40-year-old man in a diaper holding an ax.
* CruelAndUnusualDeath: A good number of the ghosts died in downright horrible circumstances. Also, [[spoiler:Ben Moss and Kalina both meet very grisly fates.]]
* CurbStompBattle: [[spoiler: [[HeroicSacrifice Dennis vs. the Hammer and the Juggernaut.]] Guess who wins?]]
* DeadAllAlong: Inverted. [[spoiler: Cyrus is alive the whole time.]]
* DecompositeCharacter: In the 1960 film, the character Elaine was a medium, the dead uncle's female assistant, and the housekeeper. This version has the 3 separate characters of a (male) medium, the uncle's female assistant, and the housekeeper.
%%* DrivenToSuicide: How The Angry Princess died.
%%* DropTheHammer: Guess.
* EarnYourHappyEnding: [[spoiler:The film ends with Cyrus being violently punished, the ghosts being released, and with all the members of the Kriticos family and Maggie alive, and even the ghost of Jean seems to have found peace at the end. Likewise, Dennis finally found peace after his HeroicSacrifice against the Hammer and the Juggernaut.]]
* EvenEvilHasStandards:
** [[spoiler: Kalina may be in on the whole thing, but she is horrified when Cyrus suggests putting Arthur's kids in danger.]]
** In the Jackal's backstory, he realized how despicable his actions were and had himself committed to an asylum but eventually went insane just as rehabilitation proved impossible for his already messed up mentality. When the fire that claimed his life broke out. He refused help and decided it was better to simply die.
%%* EverythingsBetterWithSpinning
%%* EvilLaugh / LaughingMad: The Jackal
%%** The Bound Woman as well, though she doesn't appear as often as The Jackal does. [[spoiler: This is particularly evident after the ghosts kill Cyrus.]]
* EyeScream: The Angry Princess committed suicide after an attempt at performing self-cosmetic surgery went horribly wrong and left her blinded in one eye.
* FaintingSeer: Dennis Rafkin's visions are in [[ScreamerTrailer Screamer]] form, so it's no wonder even the mildest of them leave him grabbing his head in pain.
%%* [[spoiler:FakingTheDead: Cyrus Kriticos.]]
* FanDisservice: The Angry Princess is completely naked, though covered in deep, self-inflicted slashes -- [[BreastAttack including one right through a nipple]].
* FlippingTheBird: Dennis, to the Hammer.
%%* FullFrontalAssault: The Angry Princess.
* GhostlyGoals: Largely of the general vindictiveness type, but many of them are in the house specifically because they are trapped there.
* GoOutWithASmile: In a sense. [[spoiler:Dennis doesn't actually die smiling, but, when he later appears as a ghost, he seems a lot more content and at peace then when he was alive. This is because he no longer had to suffer the constant barrage of horrifying and grotesque imagery his psychic powers gave him.]]
* GogglesDoSomethingUnusual: The main characters wear special glasses to see the ghosts, in a ShoutOut to the Illusion-O gimmick of the original.
* {{Gorn}}: Mostly avoided, although the death of [[spoiler:Moss]] is a very effective and shocking example. [[WordOfGod According to the director's commentary]], the creators were surprised they managed to get away with it without using any [[GoryDiscretionShot discretion shots]].
* GottaCatchEmAll: In the remake, Cyrus Kriticos must find thirteen specifically-themed spirits to [[spoiler:power his infernal machine. His nephew Arthur would have been the thirteenth ghost, if he'd killed himself as Cyrus planned]].
%%* TheGrotesque: The Great Child and The Dire Mother.
* HalfTheManHeUsedToBe: [[spoiler:Ben Moss]] finds himself backing away from the Angry Princess until - CHOMP - he gets vertically bisected by a glass door slamming shut. We get a nice view of his frontally-sectioned head and chest when one half falls away. Leading to an awesomely funny line: "Did [[spoiler:the lawyer]] split?"
* HatesBeingTouched: Dennis, and [[PsychicPowers for a good reason]]. And according to the ghost backstories, The Jackal hates it as well [[spoiler:after his stay in a mental hospital and might be the reason he died when the place went up in flames.]]
%%* HauntedHeadquarters: Inverted.
* HauntedHouse: Invoked: [[spoiler:Cyrus Kriticos builds the glass house as an infernal engine, and then deliberately moves specific ghosts into it as a power source.]]
* HeroicSacrifice:
** [[spoiler: Dennis fights the Hammer and the Juggernaut alone because there's only enough room in the corner behind the shield for one, so he throws Arthur behind it because he has a family to rescue.]]
** Subverted with [[spoiler:Arthur, who's led to believe that he has to perform one to save his family. At the last moment, he realizes it's a BatmanGambit by Cyrus and his death would actually fulfill his uncle's plans]].
* HoistByHisOwnPetard: [[spoiler: Cyrus is thrown into the spinning rings by most of the ghosts and chopped to pieces.]]
* HollywoodHypeMachine: Shannon Elizabeth's appearance here owed much to the fame she earned by being in ''Film/AmericanPie''.
* HumanSacrifice: [[spoiler:The last ghost will manifest itself this way]].
%%* IShallTauntYou
%%* ImpendingDoomPOV
%%* InfantImmortality: Played straight with Bobby, averted with the First Born Son.
* JumpScare: Lampshaded.
--> '''Dennis''': Oh, God! I hate it when they do that!
--> '''Maggie''': Do what?
--> '''Dennis''': They wait for your to stick your FACE right up against the glass! And then give you a big, fat "boo"!
* KarmicDeath:
** [[spoiler:Cyrus Kriticos, who gets killed by the ghosts he captured and tried to exploit.]]
** [[spoiler:Kalina, who taunted Dennis for not realizing he was being used by Cyrus - except she was being used by him too.]]
** [[spoiler:Ben Moss is in on the whole thing and taunts the Angry Princess when he sees her inside her containment cube, and is later killed when he is bisected by glass doors while backing away from said ghost.]]
* KickTheDog: Cyrus does this at the beginning, when he slaps Dennis' medication out of his hand for no discernible reason. [[spoiler: He also does a more extreme form of dog-kicking later, when he has Kalina squished to death between two panels of glass.]]
%%* KnifeNut: The Angry Princess.
* LargeHam:
** Matthew Lillard, of course.
** [[spoiler:Cyrus]] absolutely [[ChewingTheScenery devours the scenery]] whenever he's on-screen.
%%* LetsSplitUpGang
* Letters2Numbers: As you can see, letters "t" and the first "e" in "Thirteen" have been have replaced by numbers 1 and 3 in the film's name.
%%* LockDown
%%* LosingYourHead: The Torso's head.
* MadBomber: Kalina.
--> "Well, the other option is I have enough explosives to blow us back to the middle ages, of course none of us would be around to brag about it afterward."
%%* {{Malaproper}}: Bobby makes a few of those.
%%* TheMole: [[spoiler:Kalina.]]
* [[MrExposition Mrs Exposition]]: While taking shelter in Cyrus' office, Kalina explains the purpose of the house and the Black Zodiac.
%%* NamesToRunAwayFromReallyFast: All of the ghosts' titles.
%%* NeckSnap: How the Bound Woman died.
* OhCrap: Dennis' reaction when he learns that the Jackal is loose.
* ParentalAbandonment: The Juggernaut's backstory. He was abandoned at birth by his mother and his father died years later.
* PowerOfLove: [[spoiler:The thirteenth ghost's specialty]].
%%* PsychicPowers
%%* PsychopathicManchild: The Great Child.
* PyrrhicVictory: [[spoiler:When the house is destroyed, all the ghosts are free again... especially the most dangerous ones]].
* TheRemake
* RichBitch: The Bound Woman, when she was alive.
* RoaringRampageOfRevenge: The Hammer had one in life, when a gang, led by someone who falsely accused him of stealing, [[DisproportionateRetribution killed his wife and children]].
%%* SassyBlackWoman: Maggie.
%%* ScaryBlackMan: The Hammer.
* ScreamerTrailer: Used in-universe as new ghosts are revealed or about to get up to their usual shenanigans.
* SeeThruSpecs: Both movies used special glasses to see the ghosts, but in the original the ''audience'' got them, while in the remake the ''characters'' got them.
%%* SerialKiller: The Juggernaut and the Jackal.
* SharpDressedMan: Dennis wears an awesome suit throughout much of the movie.
* SlashedThroat: [[spoiler:Cyrus gets this at the beginning of the film... or so it seems at first.]]
* SmallNameBigEgo: The Torn Prince a.k.a. Royce Clayton was this in his backstory.
%%* SmugSnake: Ben Moss.
* SoundtrackDissonance: "Mirror Mirror" by rapper Rah Digga ([[DoItYourselfThemeTune who plays Maggie]]) plays over the end credits.
* SpannerInTheWorks [[spoiler:Cyrus is beaten in the end when Maggie (who has just woken up from being knocked out by Kalina) happens upon the records playing the chants that are controlling the ghosts and messes with them. This causes the ghosts to break free and turn on Cyrus.]]
* SpiritAdvisor: [[spoiler:Ghost Dennis, who seems much more at peace with things than he was when he was alive, briefly acts as one for Arthur, complete with a YouWillKnowWhatToDo message.]]
%%* SwordCane: Cyrus has one.
* TemptingFate: Arthur says that there's no such thing as ghosts. Almost immediately, Kathy is attacked by the Jackal right in front of him
%%* ThirteenIsUnlucky
%%* TitleByNumber
%%* TitleDrop
%%* TwoFaced: The Withered Lover and The Torn Prince.
%%* UnexpectedInheritance
* UnhappyMedium: Dennis Rafkin.
-->"If you haven't noticed, '''I'm a little bit of a freak!''' I come within ten feet of anything dead, I go into seizures. I touch somebody, and a whole life full of shit just flashes in front of my eyes!"
%%* VideoWills
* WesternZodiac: The movie uses its own (invented) "Black Zodiac" to account for 12 of the ghosts' presence and assign them titles.
* WhatTheHellTownspeople: The backstories for the Hammer and the Pilgrimess have this in ''spades''.
%%* WindowLove: [[spoiler: Arthur and Jean.]]
%%* WindowPain
* WitchHunt: The Pilgrimess died as a result of this.
* WolverineClaws: The Jackal prefers to use his fingernails when he's attacking.
%%* WoobieDestroyerOfWorlds: The Great Child and the Hammer.
* WorstAid: When Dennis goes into spasms, Arthur grabs him in an attempt to help him and unknowingly makes his condition worse.
* WouldHurtAChild: [[spoiler:Cyrus]] has no problem sacrifing Arthur's children to complete his plans. His partner on the other hand [[WouldntHurtAChild is horrified at the suggestion]].
%%* YouHaveOutlivedYourUsefulness: [[spoiler:Cyrus does this to Kalina]].

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