''The Bear and the Doll'' (original title: ''L'Ours et la Poupée'') is a 1970 romantic comedy French film directed by Michel Deville and starring Creator/BrigitteBardot and Jean-Pierre Cassel.

Gaspard (Cassel) is a cellist who enjoys living quietly in the countryside with his son and three nieces. Felicia (Bardot) is a bon vivant who seduces and drops men for her own amusement. [[MeetCute They meet when they crash their cars.]] Some mild bickering later, they part ways, but Felicia is completely aghast that any man could be indifferent to her charms, so she decides that the most sensible course of action in this case is to stalk Gaspard, invade his house and heckle his nerves until he gives her the attention she wants. Needless to say, HilarityEnsues.

The American release of the DVD is dub-only, is in black-and-white (when the actual film is in color) and has blurry picture quality. [[TheyChangedItNowItSucks You are advised to avoid it like the plague.]]

!!Provides examples of:
* TheAllegedCar: Gaspard owns an actual alleged car, the Citroen 2CV. But it's Felicia's Rolls Royce that gets this treatment.
* BelligerentSexualTension: Gaspard and Felicia.
* CloudCuckooLander: Both Gaspard and Felicia once lack of sleep kicks in.
* FinishingEachOthersSentences: Gaspard's and Felicia's last lines of dialogue at the end.
--->"One day, a bear..." "...came across a doll." "Can we imagine two animals less alike?" "The doll said..." "The bear got mad." "And nasty." "Not so." "The doll got angry as well and ran off." "Realising that he didn't want her to leave, the bear followed her and, having found her, said..." "Do you know the fable of the bear and the doll?"
* FoodSlap: Felicia [[{{Pun}} jams]] her sandwich in Gaspard's face.
* [[GenderBlenderName Gender Blender Nickname]]: Felicia is often called Felix. She even calls herself that when monologuing.
* GratuitousEnglish / GratuitousItalian: Felicia uses both at different points in the film. She sings and yells in Italian, possibly as part of her troll routine, and asks a cow a question in English, because she stayed up all night and isn't really in her right mind.
* GreekChorus: The kids serve as this a few times regarding Felicia and Gaspard's relationship.
* GrumpyBear: Gaspard, as the title indicates.
* IShallTauntYou: Felicia does things like losing her car keys on purpose and attempting to stain Gaspard's rug, all to get his attention.
* ItAmusedMe: Felicia's ''modus operandi'', really.
* KissingUnderTheInfluence: Gaspard's and Felicia's second kiss is under the effects of sleep-deprivation.
* {{Leitmotif}}: Gaspard has an orchestral one and Felicia has a rockin' one.
* LiteralMetaphor:
--->'''Felicia''': ''(monologuing)'' Felix, you need to drop it.
--->''(drops a pile of logs)''
--->'''Felicia''': Ah! Not the logs, dummy! The guy!
* NotDistractedByTheSexy: Gaspard, to the despair of Felicia.
** In one particular scene, Felicia shows off her leg and moves Gaspard's hand to feel it. Then we get this:
--->'''Felicia''': What are you thinking about right now?
--->'''Gaspard''': That I'm perfectly positioned to do a judo throw.
* OutNumberedSibling: Arthur, Gaspard's only child, is outnumbered by the 3 female cousins they're currently living with. They also enjoy invoking KissingCousins with him.
* SnarkToSnarkCombat: Gaspard and Felicia.
* StalkerWithACrush: Felicia, though it's rather ambiguous whether she does the things she does out of genuine romantic interest or because she's really, really bored.
* TitleDrop: "Do you know the fable of the bear and the doll?"
* {{Troll}}: Felicia, Felicia, ''Felicia''. A prime example is her second bath scene, in which Gaspard's son is sitting near her, and then she rises from the water to reveal that she was wearing her dress all along.
--->"Nyaah, nyaah, I kept my dress on! So naughty men won't see a thing!"
* {{Tsundere}}: Felicia is capable of having an amiable conversation with Gaspard in one moment and then yelling and throwing food at his face the next.
* UnwantedHarem: How Arthur feels about his cousins.
--->'''Arthur''': Look cousins, if you lack men, find some. I won't cope all alone.
* UptightLovesWild: Gaspard resists and resists but ultimately gives in to Felicia.