->''"I was pretty stunned to see the infamous "Santa rape" scene in the ''Warrior Christmas Special'' but that would not be the first nor the last time Santa took it full in the ass from the pro wrestling industry..."''
-->--[[WebVideo/TheSpoonyExperiment The Spoony One]], opening his review of the film.

''Santa With Muscles'' is a 1996 comedy about a wealthy, greedy health food guru named Blake (played by HulkHogan) who winds up on the run from the cops when a paintball session goes wildly awry. Disguising himself as a MallSanta, a blow to the head leaves him with amnesia -- and thanks to an "elf" who can use some, and perhaps ''his'', money, he is subsequently convinced that he's the ''real'' Santa. From there, Blake decides to [[SavingTheOrphanage save an orphanage]] from supervillain Ebner Frost and his strange henchmen, who want the land the building is on for an unusual reason...


* AmnesiacLiar
* AnAssKickingChristmas: Filled with ludicrous car chases and sword fights with highly explosive crystals.
* BadassSanta: Hulk Hogan as Blake gets to be one.
* EasyAmnesia: Blake gets hit on the head once and forgets everything. Another blow to the head restores his memory.
* HesGotAWeapon: "Look out! He's got a candy cane!" during Blake-as-Santa's battle with mall thieves.
* IdentityAmnesia: And all it takes is one whack on the head to cure it.
* JerkWithAHeartOfGold: The movie is supposed to show Blake's transition from a reckless egotistical rich guy to a child-caring philantrophist, but the IdentityAmnesia lessens the impact on his character.
* MadeOfExplodium: The crystals in the caverns below the orphanage -- although they apparently switch to being made of ''im''plodium at the end of the film, whereby [[spoiler:they seem to form some sort of vortex that sucks the orphanage into it]]. It also needs to be pointed out that while we're told that the crystals are horribly unstable and will blow up at ''the slightest touch'', at the climax Black and Ebner have a SwordFight with them, smashing the highly explosive crystals together for several minutes with ''absolutely no effect at all.''
* RuleOfCool: The only reason why a local policeman would have and use a rocket launcher in the middle of a car chase.
* TerrifiedOfGerms: Ebner Frost, the BigBad, to the point where his {{Mooks}} spray every room he walks into with disinfectant first.
* UnscientificScience: While piezoelectric crystals do exist and can produce electricity, they certainly don't glow purple or explode.