->''"Eat hot lead, Fritz!"''
-->-- '''Winston Churchill'''

June 1940 -- England's darkest hour. The [[AlternateHistory entire British army has surrendered at Dunkirk]]. A demoralised UsefulNotes/WinstonChurchill is planning to retire in a few days. Chris the farm labourer can't join the army because [[DistinguishingMark his hands are too big]] to fit inside a trigger guard, and TheVicar is keeping his [[LoveInterest beautiful daughter Daisy]] at arms length. Meanwhile ThoseWackyNazis have an EvilPlan -- dig a tunnel under the English Channel to London, capture Churchill and end the war in one stroke! Mustering what little forces he has, Churchill orders a retreat to Scot Land -- a wild and uncivilised country populated by [[BraveScot savage warriors]] with huge hands, lead by the legendary Film/{{Braveheart}}. As Churchill's RagtagBandOfMisfits HoldTheLine at Hadrian's Wall, Chris must go on a lone quest to seek out England's last hope, and the reason for his massive mitts.

Unfortunately any story this epic has to be scaled down, say to about 1/6 size. That's right -- this is the UK's answer to ''Film/TeamAmericaWorldPolice''. Your Mileage May Vary over whether it matches that movie for laughs, but it has its moments particularly if you're a fan of British UsefulNotes/WorldWarII movies. Or if you're Scottish.

!!''Jackboots on Whitehall'' provides examples of:

* ActorAllusion (InUniverse)
-->'''Chris:''' We need your help, and your Film/{{lethal weapon}}s!\\
'''[[Creator/MelGibson Braveheart]]:''' Would that be [[Film/LethalWeapon 1]], [[Film/LethalWeapon2 2]], [[Film/LethalWeapon3 3]] or [[Film/LethalWeapon4 4]]?
* AmazonBrigade: The FANY's, and that "wild pack of bloody Bavarian bitches!"
* AnachronismStew: The German army that attacks Hadrian's Wall advance in Roman ''testudo'' formation and have motorbike-mounted {{Battering Ram}}s. Their opponents make use of catapults, Napoleonic uniforms and muskets, German weapons captured by LaResistance, and a WWI biplane.
* ArtisticLicenseHistory: Listing every instance would be an exercise in futility.
* ApatheticCitizens: Chris makes a RousingSpeech and calls on everyone to help save Churchill. They want to go to the pub instead.
* BattleCry: The Scots shout "[[AsLongAsItSoundsForeign Och aye!]]" as they're charging the Nazis.
* BiggusDickus: It's implied that not only Chris' hands are big...
* BigNo: Fiske shouts this when the brave Brit rushing to start his plane gets killed.
* BlatantLies: Loudspeakers declare "THE GERMAN ARMY IS YOUR FRIEND!" as said army guns down civilians in Trafalgar Square.
* BoomHeadshot: Bet you never thought you'd see one happen to a puppet!
%%* BreakOutTheMuseumPiece
* BritishTeeth: Seen on General Montgomery, among others.
* CommieNazis: [[EagleSquadron US volunteer pilot]] Fiske appears to be generally confused as to which ideology he's fighting. He also thinks Mr Churchill is a President and his PraetorianGuard are Indians. [[UsefulNotes/IndiansWithIglas Which they are, actually]].
* DayOfTheJackboot: Obviously.
* DoubleEntendre: Loads of 'em
-->'''Monty:''' ''(after the tunnel opens)'' "The Nazis are coming right up our behind!"
* DragQueen: UsefulNotes/AdolfHitler dressed as UsefulNotes/QueenVictoria. Wielding a [[BlingBlingBang diamond-covered Luger]], no less.
* DrillTank: Literally -- it's a panzer with a drill stuck to its front.
* [[FakeBrit Fake Scot]]: InUniverse; it is rumored that legendary Scottish warrior Braveheart is [[Creator/MelGibson actually Australian]].
* FakeUltimateHero: Suggested with Captain England.
* FunWithAcronyms: The letters on the sides of the Spitfires are "UFO" (the O being the RAF roundel) and, on Fiske's plane "[[UnusualEuphemism UFOK]]". The FANY's are the [[IncrediblyLamePun butt]] of several jokes, but this is true even of the real [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/FANY First Aid Nursing Yeomanry]].
* GasmaskMooks: Who breathe like [[StarWars Darth Vader]].
* GondorCallsForAid: [[Film/TheLordOfTheRings Beacon fires are lit]] [[AnachronismStew to signal the invasion]].
* {{Gorn}}: Yes, it is possible to do this with marrionettes.
* GrimUpNorth: Scot Land is an uncivilised place full of murky woods, the wreckage of {{Lost Roman Legion}}s, [[DeadGuyOnDisplay impaled skeletons]], and bloodthirsty blue-faced savages with huge hands.
* HereThereBeDragons: The excessive detail of the map of Britain stops abruptly at the Scottish border, which shows no towns or roads at all.
* HeroicSacrifice: The Nazis jump out of the Hindenburg [[ColdEquation when it starts falling]].
* HistoricalDomainCharacter: Many. [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Billy_Fiske Billy Fiske]] was a real RAF pilot, although he was likely less of a CloudCuckoolander in real life.
* IAmTheNoun: Chris bemoans the fact that he's not allowed to join the military because the government says his hands are too big. Winston Churchill declares "I am the government!"
* InkSuitActor: Chris looks an awful lot like Ewan [=McGregor=].
* KickTheDog: The evil zeppelin commander flies past Captain England and targets a baby carriage instead. [[InfantImmortality Fortunately a gust of wind deflects the bomb]] onto Captain England anyway.
* LaResistance: Gaston, who is [[EveryoneLooksSexierIfFrench quite the ladies' man]].
* LiquidCourage: When the Vicar gets drunk and starts insulting the advancing Germans, Churchill orders the barrel to be rolled out.
-->'''Vicar:''' "Come and fight me -- my God against yours!"
-->'''Soldier:''' "Sorry sir, he must have found his way back to the bottle."
-->'''Churchill:''' "[[TheAlcoholic Good man]]."
-->'''Vicar:''' "Sausage eating wankers! ''(echo)'' WANKERS! WANKERS! WANKERS!"
-->'''Churchill:''' "Let us take example from the Church. Double the ale ration, two pints per man!"
* NotIfTheyEnjoyedItRationalisation: A Scot drags a screaming German blonde into his tent.
-->'''German:''' "Nein, nein, nein!"
-->'''Scot:''' "Take that!"
-->'''German:''' "Oh ja!"
* ManInAKilt
-->"So, the stories are true. Men in skirts!"
* [[spoiler:MeetTheNewBoss: The Scots throw the Germans out of England, then take over the country themselves.]]
* MillionMookMarch: The German army puts on a victory parade in London.
* MonumentalDamage: Those German swine blow up Nelson's Column and the Cenotaph. And 10 Downing Street...[[ImperialStormtrooperMarksmanshipAcademy eventually]].
* MosesInTheBulrushes: Chris as a baby.
* MusicForCourage: Daisy starts singing the hymn "Jerusalem" as the German army advances.
-->'''Churchill:''' "That's it: Sing! Sing!"
-->'''Everyone:''' ''"And was Jerusalem builded here, upon those dark satanic mills..."''
-->'''Vicar:''' "Yes those dark, [[SinisterMinister satanic mills!]]" ''(EvilLaugh)''
* PraetorianGuard: Churchill's loyal Punjabi bodyguards are the only British army unit that wasn't captured at Dunkirk.
* PuppetKing: Averted as the King of England is thrown in the Tower of London by the Nazis. Of course, you might say he was a [[IncrediblyLamePun puppet king in the first place]].
-->"You fools! Don't you know I'm ¾ German?"
* RagtagBandOfMisfits: Elite Punjabi guards, gun-toting FANY's, an American volunteer in a biplane, and a HomeGuard made up of men of the land -- are all that's left between England and Nazi domination.
%%* RammingAlwaysWorks
* {{Retraux}}: Presented in glorious Panzervision.
* RousingSpeech: Frequently spoofed.
-->'''Churchill:''' "Never, in the field of human conflict, was so much, ''buggered up'', by so few, for so many!"
* ShoutOut: Spoofs StiffUpperLip war movies set in UsefulNotes/WorldWarII and earlier, as well as more recent films like ''Film/TheLordOfTheRings'' and ''Film/{{Braveheart}}''. Also Churchill in a pin-stripe suit, wielding a drum-fed Thompson submachine gun, is from a famous [=WW2=] photo.
* SoleSurvivor: Fiske is the last remaining member of The Few.
* StiffUpperLip: They don't get any stiffer!
%%* {{Supermarionation}}
* TheVicar, who's also a BadassPreacher with hints of SinisterMinister.
* ZeppelinsFromAnotherWorld: The Hindenburg makes an appearance, apparently none the worse for having exploded. It's [[ImmuneToBullets armoured now however]].
* ZergRush: The German army when attacking Hadrian's Wall. But then again, it's difficult for marionettes to do anything else.