[[quoteright:275:http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/hawk-the-slayer_8432.jpg]]
[[caption-width-right:275:''"Then Voltan will see who is the lord of the dance!"'']]

->''"I am no messenger, but I will give you a message. The message of death!"''
-->-- '''Drogo'''

''Hawk The Slayer'' is a fine piece of nonsense set in the world of ''DungeonsAndDragons''-inspired fantasy, a place where longswords, short bows and daggers are swiftly drawn, leather, chainmail and a kind of cloth notable only for its brown-ness remain fashionable and there's always an evil one roaming about. The evil one in this adventure is Voltan ([[LargeHam Jack Palance]]), who's so very evil on account of him bearing a scar on his face that, as we're told by a mysterious figure who lives within a mountain, will not heal. Quite whether the scar came before the willingness to do evil isn't something that ''Hawk The Slayer'' makes clear but he is quickly doing all manner of terrible things, all of which seem to involve murder. Indeed, the film opens with Voltan murdering his own father as well as the woman intended to be the wife of his brother.

That brother is Hawk (John Terry), who arrives too late to save his father but in time to hear the prophecy that he had been guarding and which had seen him slain by his own son. As he dies, Hawk's father gives him a magical sword (which Voltan had desired) and the two are set on a path that will see them face one another in battle. When Voltan breaks into a convent and kidnaps the Mother Superior, a guy with an [[SchizoTech automatic crossbow]] seeks a hero. Finding none, he ends up finding Hawk. Hawk comes to the rescue of the Sisters of the Holy Word, promising not only that he will raise the two thousand pieces of gold but will defeat Voltan. Carrying his sword before him, Hawk sets out to gather a band of warriors...

They're [[http://www.filmschoolrejects.com/news/the-return-of-hawk-the-slayer.php making]] a [[http://www.joblo.com/index.php?id=24949 sequel]].
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!!This movie has examples of:
* AntiHero: Hawk seems like a TechnicalPacifist at first ("You go in peace!"); by the Hunchback scene, he seems no longer to have any qualms about murdering any mook who inconveniences him.
* BigBad: Voltan.
** BiggerBad:Voltan's dark mistress.
* BigEater: The giant.
** [[IllTakeTwoBeersToo I'll Take Two Beers Too]]
* BigGuy: The giant.
* BoisterousBruiser
* BurnTheWitch
* CainAndAbel: Hawk and Voltan
* CurbStompBattle: two guys with automatic weapons and a powerful witch ''vs.'' ordinary medieval soldiers. Even without the guy with the magic sword (and the dwarf with the whip) it would have been a walkover.
* DeadpanSnarker: The dwarf.
* {{Distressed Damsel}}s
* TheDragon: Drogo.
* EvenEvilHasLovedOnes: Despite threatening to kill him at one point, Voltan seems genuinely distraught at Drogo's death, even though [[ObliviousAdoption Drogo isn't his biological son.]]
* EveryoneCallsHimBarkeep: The closest thing to a name that the blind witch seems to have is "Woman".
* EvilOverlord: Voltan
* EyeScream: Voltan's scar is apparently a result of his being stabbed in the eye with a piece of burning wood by Hawk's girlfriend.
* GoodWitchVersusBadWitch
* HeroicFantasy
* {{Hobbits}}
* ICallItVera
* ImprobableAimingSkills
* JabbaTableManners: The Slaver. His mouth gets him killed too, so it's LaserGuidedKarma.
* LargeHam: Jack Palance as Voltan
-->'''Voltan''': "See how it glows!"
-->''DROGOOOOO!''
* LastOfHisKind: Gort, Crow and Boldwin.
* {{Leitmotif}}: The pan flute cue every time Hawk is about to do something.
* TheLostWoods: Much of the scenes seem to be in the same patch of British forest.
* MauveShirt
* NotableOriginalMusic
* ObviouslyEvil: Voltan
* OminousFog: In said British forest.
* OurDwarvesAreAlltheSame: Averted. Hawk's dwarf companion doesn't have a long beard and he uses a whip instead of an axe.
* OurElvesAreBetter
* PayEvilUntoEvil: "The end truly justifies the means!" Uh, sure...
* PluckyComicRelief: The dwarf.
* RagtagBunchOfMisfits: Let's see we have a heroic swordsman with a CoolSword, a dwarf thief, a BigGuy with blunt weapon, an elf that talks like Spock, a blind magic user that uses glowing magic balls, and a one-armed man with a automatic crossbow.
* RoboSpeak: Even though Crow isn't a robot, he speaks like one.
* SayMyName: DROGOOOOOO!
* SchizoTech
* SequelHook: [[spoiler: Voltan gets ressurected by the dark mistress at the end]]
* TheStoic: Nearly everyone, due to bad, bad acting, but Hawk and his elf buddy literally never show any expression other than "intense staring".
* StopTrick: The automatic crossbow and elf's bow are so fast [[BlatantLies the camera can't keep up]] so it looks just like they repeat the same short scenes of them firing.
* SummonToHand
* ThrowingYourSwordAlwaysWorks
* UpgradeArtifact: Elven Mindstone Blade
* WeaponOfChoice
** AncestralWeapon
** ImprobableWeaponUser
*** AutomaticCrossbows
*** ExoticWeaponSupremacy
** WhipItGood
* WellDoneSonGuy: Voltan, to Drogo.
* WhatMeasureIsAMook
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