->''"From the future traveled a master race of cyborgs. They made abductions from Earth's past. The dinosaurs were trained as trackers. The humans were bred as slaves. Now a runaway slave escapes to a place his people call {{heaven}}... we know it as Earth."''
-->--''The OpeningNarration''

If someone were to combine ''TheTerminator'' and ''Film/JurassicPark'', with a fraction of the formers' budgets, while [[WhatDoYouMeanItsNotSymbolic throwing in religious overtones]] just to spice things up a bit, you'd get something close to ''Future War'', a [[DirectToVideo direct-to-video]] gem ([[SoBadItsGood for a given value of "gem"]]) featured on [[Recap/MysteryScienceTheater3000S10E04FutureWar a season ten episode]] of ''Series/MysteryScienceTheater3000''.

The story concerns "[[EveryoneCallsHimBarkeep the Runaway]]," a slave who escapes his cyborg masters' spaceship and crash-lands just off the coast of California. Two cyborgs and a pack of dinosaur puppets are dispatched to recapture him. The Runaway kickboxes one of the cyborgs to death and takes down a dinosaur puppet, but is then unceremoniously [[CrashIntoHello hit by a car]] driven by Sister Anne, a hooker/ganger/druggie-turned novitiate nun. Anne takes him back to her home, a half-way house inhabited by overweight men, and nurses the Runaway back to health. With him choking her and all, they seem to be hitting it off, but their growing bond is interrupted by a dinosaur puppet attack that claims one of Anne's friends.

Anne and the Runaway make a break for it, and wander around the streets and ride on a train for a while. Anne's having second thoughts about the whole nun thing, but the Runaway quotes verses from Literature/TheBible, which mostly seems to confuse her. Then the pair are picked up by cops and tag along as a [=SWAT=] team combats another one of those dinosaur puppets. The heavily-armed specialists get their asses bitten off until the Runaway takes down the threat with a stab to the jaw, and in gratitude, they haul him back to the police HQ for questioning. Fortunately, the remaining cyborg tracks the Runaway there, and our kickboxing hero is able to escape in the carnage, thrashing the cyborg in the process.

Our heroes reunited, Anne calls in some favors and enlists the aid of her former clients/gangmates/customers to raise a small army to combat the dinosaur puppets. Since said puppets are known to congregate near water, the last half-hour or so of the film takes place in what is meant to be a water treatment plant, which the gang blows up after suffering heavy losses. At the end, Anne's final vows are interrupted by the second cyborg showing up for one last kickboxing match, but the good guys win, Anne becomes a nun, and her halfway house "scores" a new counsellor.

Not at all to be confused with the incredibly obscure film ''FutureWar198X''.

For the ''MysteryScienceTheater3000'' version, please go to the [[Recap/MysteryScienceTheater3000S10E04FutureWar episode recap page]].

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!!''Future War'' contains examples of:

* AirVentPassageway: Subverted. A character tries to crawl in one to hide from the cyborg, but it collapses and dumps her out to be killed.
* BattleStrip: Done in the most absurd way possible.
* BlackDudeDiesFirst: Subverted. While the first death that we see involves Sister Anne's BlackBestFriend, the scene in question is actually a FlashForward to the film's ending, and so the black dude in question is actually the third-to-last person to die.
* ClothingDamage: Botched. During the climactic final duel, the Runaway clearly takes off his shirt.
* ContainerMaze: Featured during the opening chase scene, using empty cardboard boxes. The pursuer takes advantage of this.
* CrashIntoHello: A rare example involving a vehicle and a pedestrian. And a nun.
* CruelAndUnusualDeath: Ignoring the lousy effects, let's face it, getting eaten by a dinosaur is not a pleasant way to go.
-->"This has got to be the ''last'' danger you think of when you're living in a dumpster."
** Especially since we do get to see the rather gory aftereffects of one such dino-puppet attack about midway through.
* DarkAndTroubledPast: Abused to high holy hell. Anne apparently used to be a hooker and drug dealer who also had connections to a local gang, an arms dealer, and some guy who's presumably a black market dealer.
* EstrogenBrigadeBait: Daniel Bernhardt has a ''lot'' of shirtless scenes. The workout scene in the jail cell is particularly blatant.
* ExplosiveLeash: On the dinosaur puppets. "No wonder fossils are so rare."
* [[EverythingsBetterWithDinosaurs Everything's Better With Dinosaur Puppets]]: Probably a subversion. The dinosaur puppets don't really help the film, unless you count by adding NarmCharm.
* {{Filler}}: The flashback and flash forwards smack of this.
* FlatEarthAtheist: Ann seems to heavily doubt the Runaway's story even after ''a dinosaur bursts into her house and kills one of her friends''.
* {{Flashback}}: Abused. While meditating/working out in his prison cell, the Runaway flashes back through his earlier fights, including the one that [[ViewersAreGoldfish ended mere minutes ago]]. All while shouting "Cha" repeatedly.
* ForcedPerspective: Used to cunningly create the illusion that the dinosaur puppets are quite large dinosaur puppets. This makes the fight scenes a little difficult.
* GenderBlenderName: According to the credits, the actress who played Sister Ann is named ''Travis''.
* HollywoodCyborg: "Cyborg" meaning "someone wearing black clothes and clown makeup with maybe a camera over one eye while moving stiffly as whirring sounds are added."
* HoistByHisOwnPetard: The Last Cyborg is ultimately killed by one of those exploding collars.
* IWorkAlone: Sister Anne uses this line on the Runaway, which makes no sense.
* JurisdictionFriction: The Feds are interested in the Runaway's story of time-traveling cyborgs, and shut out the local police who captured him. It doesn't matter, seeing how they're all dead in the end.
* LanternJawOfJustice: A villainous example, thanks to Robert Z'Dar of ''Film/{{Soultaker}}'' fame.
* MagicCountdown: Even on screen, it goes faster than it should!
-->'''Tom Servo''': Introducing new, faster seconds.
** Yet, oddly, offscreen it goes ''slower'' than it should.
* MindScrew: This film makes absolutely no sense with random jump cuts, confusing flashbacks, plot holes a mile wide, and dialogue that borders on incomprehensible. Mike and the Bots think that the director was trying a bold new filmmaking technique in which you don't actually look at what your filming.
* {{Motifs}}: Empty boxes, obese males, redressed parking ramps, plaid. Seriously, just about every good guy in the cast is wearing some sort of plaid. [[RummageSaleRejects Even the grizzled, overweight gangers]].
** To be fair, plaid is stereotypically associated with gangbangers. Of course, that doesn't explain why everyone else is wearing it, too. The Film was actually filmed in 1994. It wasn't relased until 1997. So it make sense since '94 was the heyday of the Grunge era.
* NeighbourhoodFriendlyGangsters: Always ready to help.
* TheNineties: The entire movie was clearly costumed by raiding [[Music/PearlJam Eddie Vedder's]] closet. The Bots call it "The Plaid Parade."
* NoNameGiven: The Runaway is never even given a nickname to be referred to by for convenience's sake; even the credits only list him as "The Man". And that doesn't make any logical sense, he is clearly not cool enough to be the Man.
* NonindicativeName: It's not set in the future, and there's no war.
* ShirtlessScene: Even if he has to clearly do it himself...
* StockSoundEffect: Often not well-matched with the visual, such as the cyborg sounding like a car's suspension when he deflects a cardboard box, or when two characters open a wooden door in a house and it sounds like a steel door on a ship or a submarine, or when we hear crickets chirping even though it's clearly the middle of the day...
* TakeOurWordForIt: The Slave Rebellion happens off-camera, while the audience gets static shots of generic sci-fi sets.
** That's because they used stock footage from a different movie which didn't star the lead actor.
* TakeThatUs: Legend has it that while working on the movie one crewmember said how fun it would be if their movie was aired on ''Mystery Science Theater.''
** The art director for the film actually said he felt MST3K was ''too lenient'' on the film! Talk about CreatorBacklash!
* TerminatorTwosome: Kinda-sorta-not really. As a film "inspired" (ahem) by ''TheTerminator'', this movie uses it, but there isn't necessarily time travel involved, and there's three humanoids plus an unknown number of dinosaur puppets.
* TimeTravel: Implied in the "backstory," never shown.
* UnexplainedRecovery:
** The Master Cyborg that the Runaway beats up in the police HQ and left pinned under ''an exploding dinosaur'' later ambles into the dam for a rematch with the Runaway.
** Later on, after being trapped in ''an exploding dam'', he crashes through the ceiling of the church in the finale for a ''third'' fight with the Runaway.
** The kid Max vanishes after the dinosaur attack on the halfway house, and nothing is mentioned of what happened to him or where he went, even after he pops up safe & sound in church at the end of the movie.
* WeWillUseManualLaborInTheFuture: Apparently the whole reason "the Masters" need slaves is because they lack opposable thumbs. How exactly they managed to enslave anyone ever isn't made very clear. Presumably the cyborgs aren't "the Masters," nor does the species that created them feel like using robotic servants instead of captured humans.
* WhatHappenedToTheMouse: Polaris completely vanishes from the film when the FBI forcefully take control of the case.
* YourSizeMayVary: The dinosaur puppets never seem pinned down to a consistent size. In low shots they seem about the size of large dogs (the "Cuteasaurus"), while in high shots they loom over the cast. Handwaved by the opening narration, the nun does say the dinos come in all shapes, sizes, and ages, "and its masters". Doesn't explain the inconsistent size of a dinosaur ''in the same scene''.

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