[[quoteright:263:http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/Eight_Legged_Freaks_cover_8997.jpg]]

->''"Do you hate spiders? Do you REALLY hate spiders? Well, they don't like you, either!"''
->-- '''{{Tagline}}'''

->''"The [[AttackOfThe50FootWhatever biggest]]... ''[[CoveredInGunge nastiest]]...'' '''[[AttackOfTheKillerWhatever mutant spider]] movie''' '''''[[OverlyNarrowSuperlative of all time]]!!!!'''''"''
->-- '''Alternate Tagline'''

''Eight Legged Freaks'' is a 2002 horror-comedy film directed by Ellory Elkayem, executive produced by [[Film/{{Stargate}} Roland]] [[Film/IndependenceDay Emmerich]], and starring Creator/DavidArquette, Kari Wührer, ScarlettJohansson and Doug E. Doug. The plot concerns a collection of spiders that are exposed to toxic waste, causing them to grow to gigantic proportions. Yeah. It's a 50s monster movie made with 21st century visual effects, and it's '''exactly''' what you're expecting.

It's set in [[Film/{{Them}} an Arizona nowhere town called "Prosperity"]] - which [[Film/DawnOfTheDead just happens to have a mall, just so survivors can battle spiders with improvised weapons]]. There are mine shafts for that SurvivalHorror feel. There's even a [[ExtremeSportExcusePlot scene where jumping spiders chase dirt bikers]]. Get some popcorn and watch spiders gobble bystanders and get squished by the heroes! NarmCharm!

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!! This movie contains examples of:

* AffectionateParody: The film is one of old mutant monster movies. It's not hard to notice that it doesn't take itself seriously.
** The spiders panting in exhaustion and squeaking "uh-oh" are pretty obvious signs.
** There is a scene where a spider jumps on a moose's head, mounted on a wall, and takes a bite, only to visibly complain about the taste.
** Just look at that poster and tell me it's ''not'' deliberately invoking the golden age of B-movies.
** And then there was this advert: "If you're only going to see one film this summer about a [[Film/SpiderManTrilogy giant mutant spider]], make sure [[TakeThat it's the right one]]."
* AllWebbedUp: Being a movie about giant spiders, obviously this happens there.
* AnalProbing: There's a bit where Harlan goes on a tirade about aliens and this very subject. "...I mean, what do they expect to find there? It's just wrong!"
* ArbitrarySkepticism: Harlan believes in alien conspiracy theories, but thinks the emergence of giant spiders in the town is nonsense until he actually sees them - then he thinks they are in fact the aliens he was talking about. Lampshaded by Chris.
* [[AttackOfTheKillerWhatever Attack Of The Killer]] [[AttackOfThe50FootWhatever five-foot]] (for starters!) {{Giant Spider}}s!
* AutoErotica: Bret tries to have sex with Ashley in his pickup truck. She refuses.
* BigBad: The female Orb Weaver.
-->''"You know how women like breakfast in bed."''
* BookEnds: Harland's broadcast.
* BoomHeadshot: Kari Wührer's a damned good shot. Pistol, rifle, shotgun, crossbow; result the same - [[HighPressureBlood fountains of spider guts]]!
* ChainsawGood: In a mall, Pete manages to lift the garage-door-style mesh that locked one of the stores, since the caretakers apparently neglected to lock it. He logrolls under and slams it down. However, the spiders reach their legs through, yanking him right up against the mesh but unable to bite him. His solution? Grab a nearby chainsaw and slice through all their limbs.
* ChekhovsGun: Bret's dirtbike.
** And the bottle of perfume.
** The taser gun - [[ChekhovsBoomerang twice.]]
* ConspiracyTheorist: Harlan, who believes the [[GiantSpider Giant Spiders]] are the alien invaders he has warned about his whole career.
-->You ain't getting that anal probe near me!
* ConversationalTroping: Harlan, being a conspiracy theorist, assumes the spiders are aliens. On the second broadcast of his radio show, he talks about the anal probes. This movie has do to with neither aliens (as far as we know) nor AnalProbing.
* DateRapeAverted: While they are in his truck Bret gets very handsy with Ashley who refuses his advances and then zaps him with a taser that her mother gave to her in case this happened. Unusually, while the movie certainly depicts Bret as wrong and Ashley as right, it portrays his actions as being due to a moment of teenage hormone-driven boneheadedness rather than those of an evil rapist. Bret survives the entire film and he gets back with Ashley.
* TheDragon: The giant tarantula apparently leads the spider army for Consuela.
* DyingMomentOfAwesome: Strangely, [[spoiler: Zeke the cat]]. His fight with a spider ''as big as he is'' just about destroys the drywall they're behind, and it's quite possible that he took the spider with him as the final seconds of their fight is shown to be shorting out the light they're above.
* EscortMission: Rescuing characters from a spider's lair deep in some abandoned mines.
* {{Expy}}: Chris bears a few similarities to Dewey from the ''Franchise/{{Scream}}'' films, another character played by David Arquette.
* GenreSavvy: The kid is the only one who knows fully well he's in a horror movie, and is well aware of what the spiders are gonna do. He's also well aware that no one will believe him, and lampshades it constantly.
* GiantSpider
* GroinAttack: With a taser.
* HeelFaceTurn: Bret starts off as a [[AllMenArePerverts sex-obsessed]] JerkAss, but ends up as a much nicer guy and even gets back together with his girlfriend. He plays SupportStaff to the Hero.
** Perhaps the taser [[GroinAttack to the balls]] acted as electroshock therapy.
* IdiotBall: A diner full of customers, [[DullSurprise watching the spiders outside]]. When the spiders start jumping at the window, attempting to break through, nobody considers moving in any capacity until the spiders actually manage to do so.
* KarmaHoudini: Mayor Wade. After building a useless mall, trying to turn the town into a toxic waste dump, and locking the survivors in the mall when the spiders attack, Chris saves him. At least his stupid mall blows up.
* TheMall: Built in an attempt to bring money into the town -- or, more specifically, to fill the pockets of the developers. Part of the climax takes place here.
* MightyGlacier: The tarantula is one of the biggest spiders alive, so of course the mutant tarantula becomes perhaps the biggest spider in the movie, with earth-shaking strength and the ability to knock over trailers with ease.
* NonMaliciousMonster: The spiders aren't evil; they kill for food, for territory (evidenced by a spider dueling Chris and his chair) or to satisfy the female spider as per their mating rituals.
* OhCrap: Harlan when he looks out his trailer window and sees a massive tarantula.
* OutrunTheFireball: Towards the end of the movie. Chris and Gladys on a dirt bike escape an igniting mine shaft.
* RealityIsUnrealistic: The CGI artists had problems with the giant tarantula - scaling it up realistically turned it into an adorable fuzzy thing reminiscent of a high-quality stuffed animal. They had to remove more than half its hairs before the terrifying monster-truck-sized spider was noticeable beneath.
* RuleOfFun: It doesn't take itself too seriously plot wise.
* RuleOfScary
* SpidersAreScary
* SpiderSwarm: Part of the course.
* SuperPersistentPredator: Despite having a lair full of cocooned meals, the female spider at the end feels the need to chase down Chris and Gladys, who are on a MOTORCYCLE.
* TakeThat: [[RogerEbert Roger Ebert]]'s [[http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20020717/REVIEWS/207170301/1023 review]] opened by saying that this film delivered everything that ''[[Film/MenInBlack Men In Black II]]'' did not.
* TitleDrop: "Get back, you '''[[TitleScream EIGHT LEGGED FREAKS!]]'''"
** Interestingly, that line didn't start out as a TitleDrop; the title of the movie was originally ''Arach-Attack'' according to the commentary. Unfortunately, the title has UnfortunateImplications when said out loud (the movie came out not long after the war between America and ''Iraq'' started), [[InvertedTrope so the title was changed at the last minute to reflect the line]]--which was, incidentally, ''ad-libbed'' on-set by David Arquette.
** It still retained this title (or the alternate spelling ''Arac Attack'') in other countries.
*** Which itself gets titled dropped a couple of times throughout the movie.
* ThatPoorCat: We are treated to a cat getting into a fight with a spider of equal size. Most of it takes place in an air vent where we see the cat slammed against the wall multiple times.
* ThisLoserIsYou: David Arquette plays Chris [=McCormick=], a well-meaning, sensitive schmuck just trying to save what's left of his hometown and pour his heart out to his high school crush. Actually a rather respectful application of the trope; he listens carefully to the ChildProdigy, and runs right to him once he gets real evidence. He never fails to fight hard for the town. Result? ''KarmicJackpot.'' The girl, after one too many CanNotSpitItOut moments, exasperatingly admits that yes, she knows he beat up her philandering husband for her, came back to town because he genuinely wants to help, that he loves her, and that she loves him back. ''And then he finds the Mother Lode and makes the entire town filthy stinking rich!''
* TooDumbToLive: One character simply sat, watching TV, completely unaware of the thousands of [[GiantSpider Giant Spiders]] outside and one in the room. He does not live.
** To be fair, that character was deaf and was paying full attention to the TV.
** Another example would be that BlindWithoutEm character that kept ''taking off'' his glasses. He does not live.
** Ostriches may not be geniuses, but the ones standing around calmly as their fellows are being yanked out of frame by the trapdoor spider seem to have forgotten how to run. Especially bad considering that ostriches' usually just outrun prospective predators and those that they ''can't'' outrun (or need to defend their young from) they attack. They're seven-foot tall birds that invested every evolutionary point normally in flight into their legs, and they've got talons to make a veloceraptor proud at the end of them.
* TrailersAlwaysSpoil: As you'd expect. And the movie's damn fun anyway!
* VaporWear
* WrongGenreSavvy: Harlan thinks the spiders are aliens as opposed to mutants.
* ZergRush: The jumping spiders.

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