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->''"Keanu Reeves plays a man in a black trench coat chosen by fate to uncover the shocking truth that Earth is not as we believe it to be, but merely a mundane illusion hiding an army of insidious and overwhelming enemies. So, basically, it's ''Film/TheMatrix'' [[XMeetsY with crosses]]."''
-->-- '''Website/{{Cracked}}'''

''Constantine'' is a 2005 American film very loosely based on VertigoComics' ''ComicBook/{{Hellblazer}}'' comic book, with some plot elements being taken from the "Dangerous Habits" story arc (issues #41-46) and others - such as the inclusion of Papa Midnite - from the "Original Sins" trade paperback. It was released on February 8, 2005 in Hong Kong, and on February 18, 2005 in the U.S. and Canada. It is rated R for violence and demonic images by the MPAA. It also contains [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking mild language]].

Things are getting stranger for John Constantine (played by Creator/KeanuReeves), American, atoner and Catholic demon-hunter. Demon activity is on the rise as more and more denizens of Hell are trying to cross over to earth. This would be right up Constantine's alley, but he's a little preoccupied with the fact that he's dying of lung cancer, and going to go to Hell despite all he's done. (He committed suicide at a young age, which condemns him to eternity in hell, but was revived, so when he dies for real he's going to go there.)

Things come to a head when LAPD officer Angela Dodson approaches Constantine with news that her institutionalized, possibly [[TheCassandra psychic]] sister has recently offed herself. Constantine investigates and starts to uncover a connection to the demons and a possible plot to turn Earth into a literal [[HellOnEarth Hell]].

The film is notorious among readers for being an InNameOnly adaptation -- in particular, changing the blond, British protagonist into a black-haired American who is more of an exorcist than a magician -- but it has merits aplenty if viewed as a standalone work.

Not to be confused with the {{Series/Constantine}} television adaptation of the comic of the same name, which is more faithful to the source material.

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!! ''Constantine'' contains examples of:

%% AccidentalNightmareFuel is already on YMMV
* ActingForTwo: Weisz as Angela and Isabel
* AdaptationExpansion: The novelization of the film written by John Shirley does an amazing job of expanding upon the movieverse. It develops the characters more thoroughly and explains the mythology of Constantine's job comprehensively. In addition, it includes all the deleted scenes shown on the DVD in context and fits them into continuity. For those who may be on the fence about the film, the novelization might be the tipping point into enjoying it.
* AddictionDisplacement: Constantine chews gum at the end to signal that he's quit smoking.
* AffablyEvil: Satan and arguably [[spoiler: Gabriel]].
* AllUpToYou
* AlmostKiss: Three times, between Constantine and Angela Dodson.
* AmbiguousGender: The ArchangelGabriel.
* AngelUnaware: The so-called "Half Breeds" that work for either side. Constantine states that they aren't allowed to have a direct hand in things, but they have the ability to influence humans to act on their behalf, either filling someone with HeroicResolve or driving them over the DespairEventHorizon. [[spoiler: TheStinger implies that Chas was one all along.]]
* AntiHero
* ArchangelGabriel: Played by {{Bifauxnen}} TildaSwinton. [[spoiler:Resents God's love for an unworthy humanity and plots to release Hell on Earth so that humanity can earn God's love.]]
* ArmorPiercingQuestion: "What did she do, Angela?"
* ArtisticLicenseGunSafety: When attacked by the Scavengers of the Damned, Angela pulls out her pistol and points it behind her, ending at Constantine's crotch. It may not just have been GunsAreWorthless that made him say "That's really not going to help".
* ArtisticLicenseReligion
* AsYouKnow: Played with. Constantine begins to explain to Angela that Jesus died from a soldier's spear:
-->'''Angela''': The Spear of Destiny. I'm a Catholic, John. I ''know'' the Crucifixion story.
* BadGuyBar: The Bar.
* BeautyIsNeverTarnished: Isabel looks very good for someone who jumped off a 20-foot building and crashed through a glass roof into a swimming pool.
* BigBadDuumvirate: Mammon and [[spoiler:Gabriel]].
* BigNo: Alas, poor [[spoiler:Balthazar]]...
* BlessedWithSuck: Constantine, Father Hennessy, Isabel, and Angela each have supernatural gifts which make them not quite normal in the eyes of everyday people. Seeing a nice old lady get a NightmareFace or sensing the emotions of an event from touching the newspaper can lead to this result. [[spoiler:John even warns Angela that once her power is activated, she won't just see them, ''they will know she is seeing their true face''.]]
* BottomlessMagazines: Angela's miraculous Smith & Wesson 3913.
* {{Bouncer}}: You must have [[PsychicPowers Mad Skillz]] to get into Midnite.
* BrokenAngel: [[spoiler:Gabriel's final punishment for the actions in the movie was to have Satan strip his wings and leave him mortal.]]
* CatapultNightmare: Angela, after a nightmare of her sister killing herself.
* CatchPhrase
** "This is Constantine. John Constantine, asshole."
** "This is Kramer. Chas Kramer, asshole."
* ChekhovsArmoury: The items Constantine receives from Beeman (dragonbreath, holy water ampoules, Amityville screech beetle).
* ChristianityIsCatholic: Catholicism is the only version shown.
* CondensationClue: Constantine is sure that Isabel Dodson didn't commit suicide without leaving a message for her sister Angela. He uses a repeated Armor-Piercing Question on a reluctant Angela to force her to admit that she and Isabel used this technique as children. Angela then breathes on the window in Isabel's room, revealing her final message to her sister.
* CouldntFindAPen: Hennessey carves a message into his own hand with a [[spoiler:corkscrew.]]
%% CrowningMomentOfFunny is already on YMMV
* CulturalTranslation
* CurbStompBattle: When the BigBad is revealed to be [[spoiler: Gabriel]], Constantine is effortlessly beaten. When [[spoiler:Satan turns up to save the day(!) Gabriel tries to "smite [Satan] in His honour!", only to fail because "Somebody doesn't have [Gabriel's] back any more", and then gets his wings burned off and gets blasted across the room]].
* CursedWithAwesome: John's "gift."
* DeathByIrony: [[spoiler:Beeman, a guy who collected insects, was killed by them coming out of his body]] and [[spoiler:Hennessy, who drank to dull his psychic powers, died from drinking himself to death in less than a minute]].
* DeadSidekick
* DebtDetester: Lucifer seems to be this. [[spoiler:He dislikes it so much, he didn't even ''think'' that John asking for the life of another to be saved could be a genuine HeroicSacrifice.]]
* DemonSlaying: Constantine hunts down demonic halfbreeds and sends them back to hell.
* DeusExMachina: Subverted since it's [[spoiler: Satan who saves the day.]] Though played very straight when [[spoiler: God steps in to rob Satan of Constantine's soul.]]
* [[DidYouJustFlipOffCthulhu Did You Just Flip Off Satan]]: [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome Yes. Yes he did.]]
* DidntSeeThatComing: [[spoiler:Lucifer did not expect to see John by him cutting his wrists again. He quickly realizes something is off with the situation.]]
* DrivenToSuicide: Constantine attempted to kill himself because he saw demonically-possessed people. He managed to succeed ''just'' enough for it to count as a suicide by the rules of Heaven, but ultimately survived. He's spent the rest of his life trying to buy his way out of Hell [[spoiler:and succeeds by killing himself again but this time as a HeroicSacrifice. Too bad Satan is a sore loser and saves him from dying.]]
* DoesNotLikeShoes: Lucifer, who is otherwise well-coiffed. WordOfGod states that the reason Stormare's feet are dripping with goo is that he must pollute the ground to walk on it.
* DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything: Balthazar's face after John soaked half of it in holy water. Now what other DC comic has had half his face disfigured by a vial of liquid?
* TheDriver: Chas.
* TheDulcineaEffect: "Definitely... ''mostly'' not about the girl."
* DullSurprise: Sometimes, Keanu Reeves and Rachel Weisz seem to be competing.
* EnemyRisingBehind
** The man possessed by [[spoiler:the Spear of Destiny rises behind Angela while she's in the pool.]]
** After [[spoiler:Angela is possessed, she]] rises behind Constantine.
* EvilIsPetty: Satan enjoys dicking around with Constantine when he shows up.
* ExploitedImmunity: Constantine flushes out some demons that have infested a hospital by having his apprentice perform a holy water ritual on the hospital's fire safety system, then holding a cigarette lighter below a smoke detector, triggering the sprinklers to rain holy water. The holy water burns the demons while leaving the humans inside unharmed.
* FairCop: Angela played by RachelWeisz
* FamousLastWords: "You were right, John. It's not like in the books."
* FantasticCatholicism
* FateWorseThanDeath: Half-breed demons don't "die" but are just sent to Hell. So when John plans on granting a demon Absolution and thus entry into Heaven, it is considered this.
* FetusTerrible: What an adorable little cosmic horror...
* FireAndBrimstoneHell
* FireWaterJuxtaposition: Used as a plot point. Water is said to be a "universal conduit" that can facilitate travel between Hell and its surrounding realms. In order to reach Hell, which is a red-hued realm of fire and brimstone, a person has to suspend part of their body in water while on Earth.
* FlatlinePlotline: Used to give Angela a taste of Constantine's knowledge; he drowns her in a bathtub under carefully controlled conditions.
* FliesEqualsEvil: [[spoiler:Beeman]] has a fly crawl out from under his eyelid as a sign of demonic attack upon him. He's later found dead with flies covering him and crawling out of his mouth. This may have been Balthazaar's version of irony.
* {{Foreshadowing}}: Papa Midnite tells Constantine that his soul is the only one Satan himself would come to collect. [[spoiler: He's right]].
* FlippingTheBird: Twice by Constantine. One being at the beginning after exorcise a demon out of a girl [[spoiler:and another to '''Satan''' after he finally earns his way out of hell]].
%% FridgeLogic is already on YMMV
* FriendlyTarget: [[spoiler:Father Hennessy and Beeman.]]
* GenreSavvy: [[spoiler:Lucifer is quick to realize John didn't commit suicide again for no simple reason and listened, if mockingly, to John's words about his son trying to break through. He also realized why John wasn't being drawn with him back into Hell as he did sacrifice himself for the sake of another.]]
* TheGodsMustBeLazy: God and Satan have made a deal not to directly interfere in the mortal world. The half-demons constantly break this rule, but they don't get punished - just sent back to hell by Constantine.
* GodzillaThreshold: By the end, the stakes are so high that Constantine tries to summon ''Heaven'' with the tattoos on his forearms. [[spoiler:Gabriel stops him mid-summon.]]
* GoIntoTheLight: Subverted. [[spoiler:Satan pulls Constantine ''out of'' the light and cures his lung cancer so he'll have a chance to royally screw up again.]]
* GoodSmokingEvilSmoking
* GratuitousForeignLanguage: A possessed girl screams "Papatayin natin silang lahat!" ("Let's kill them all!' in Tagalog)
* GunsAreWorthless: Angela's normal pistol is the straight example. Constantine subverts it by assembling his own gun out of a variety of holy items, allowing him to quickly blast his way through a room full of half-demons.
* HeavenSeeker: The title character goes around sending half-demons back to Hell in the hope that this will gain him entry into Heaven after he dies. It's not that John Constantine likes the idea of Heaven that much he just wants to avoid going to Hell, since he knows firsthand (due to trying to commit suicide in his youth) how horrible it is.
--> "You're a cop. Imagine being sentenced to a prison where half the inmates were put there by you."
* ToHellAndBack: Constantine is such an expert at doing this, he even teaches Angela to do it once.
* HeroicSacrifice: Subverted. [[spoiler:John dies by suicide, drawing Satan to Earth, gets him to save the world, and only wants Isabel's soul freed from hell. By this act of self-sacrifce, his previous suicide is wiped away and John, still dead, is on his way to Heaven. That is until Satan heals John of his cut wrists ''and'' cancer.]]
* HijackedByJesus: The movie removes all elements of non-Christian mythology from the setting.
* HollywoodApocrypha: The Hell Bible, which has a different Book of Revelation. And an extra five chapters in 1 Corinthians.
* HolyBurnsEvil: Holy water scalds the hell out of half-demons, destroying their human shell, and making them easier to kill.
* {{Homage}}: ArchangelGabriel resembles a famous painting of ArchangelMichael. [[http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/68/Guido_Reni_031.jpg As seen here.]]
* IHaveManyNames: The devil in this film is called both "Lucifer" and "Satan". John calls him "Lou" just to mess with him. Gabriel has a few more choice names for him, when they meet.
-->'''Gabriel:''' Son of Perdition. Little Horn. [Satan giggles] Most Unclean.\\
'''Satan:''' [[InsultBackfire I do miss the old names]].
* IdenticalTwinIDTag: Both twins are played by Rachel Weisz. Isabel has waist length hair but otherwise they're identical.
* ImmuneToDrugs: Semi-averted. Constantine has developed lung cancer from smoking, but [[spoiler:Satan cures him]].
* InNameOnly
** If you imagine that it's ''not'' based on ''ComicBook/{{Hellblazer}}'', it's actually pretty good. (Technically, we know from Etrigan's rhymes that the ''Hellblazer'' hero's name is pronounced Constan-TYNE, so this movie in which Keanu's name is Constan-TEEN qualifies as a distinct individual.)
** One gets the impression that this could have been sold as a very good American story of an occult detective by itself.
* InsaneTrollLogic: The BigBad's logic for destroying mankind in order to save it.
* InstantOracleJustAddWater
* IntangibleTimeTravel
%% IronWoobie is already on YMMV
* JerkassFacade: Constantine.
* JustHitHim: Holy knuckle dusters FTW.
* KilledMidSentence
--> [[spoiler:'''Chas:''' This is Kramer. Chas Kramer, assho...]]
* KnightTemplar: [[spoiler: Gabriel.]]
* LargeHam: ''Balthazar'' and Lucifer.
-->'''Balthazar''': Word is, you're on your way down. Fresh meat. ''(sucks his fingertips)'' Finger-lickin' good!
* LightIsNotGood: [[spoiler:ArchangelGabriel is a traitor to Heaven, and planning on unleashing Hell on Earth.]]
* LikeABadassOutOfHell: Subverted. Constantine's mortal sin is suicide - and he's been trying hard to make up for it since. (Not so in the original comic.)
* LockedIntoStrangeness: A man looks at the possessed girl and his hair turns white.
* LookBothWays: Unexpectedly, the dude wins. There's a reason for this.
* MagicalAbortion: [[spoiler:Angela]] becomes mystically pregnant with the [[spoiler:Antichrist - which is called back to hell via a personal appearance by Satan.]]
* ManOfWealthAndTaste: Satan is a pimp. Of course, he ''is'' played by PeterStormare.
* MagicMirror: Mirrors can pull demons out of the humans they've possessed and imprison them.
%% MetaCasting is already on YMMV
* [[{{MeaningfulName/Film}} Meaningful Name]]: Hennessy and Beeman - both names not only indicate a significant personality characteristic but [[ForeShadowing foreshadow]] [[spoiler:the way they die]].
* MedicateTheMedium: Constantine and Isabel both underwent BedlamHouse type treatments for their hallucinations.
* MinorCrimeRevealsMajorPlot: On a cosmic scale.
* MyDeathIsJustTheBeginning: Constantine resorts to this to prevent the release of Mammon.
%% NauseaFuel is already on YMMV
* NayTheist: To be fair, God appears to have started the whole argument.
* NeckLift: Balthazar to Constantine after he bursts into Balthazar's office. Later on, [[spoiler:Gabriel to John.]]
* NeverSuicide: Subverted.
* NiceJobFixingItVillain: [[spoiler:Satan saves the world. And sets a damned (but innocent) soul free. And cures Constantine's lung cancer. ''Satan''.]] He has his reasons.
%% NightmareFuel (as AccidentalNightmareFuel) is already on YMMV
* NoSell: Lucifer being, well, ''Lucifer'', he pulls this off twice after he shows up [[spoiler:to claim John's soul. John's being 'between worlds' has temporarily [[TimeDilation brought time almost to a standstill]]; Gabriel, in the other room, is moving in super-slow motion, but Lucifer meanders in at his normal pace and pulls Angela/Mammon out of the way, at which point time instantly returns back to normal. And in the reflected water that shows Mammon, he's struggling with all his might to escape his father's grasp. Lucifer doesn't so much as move a muscle.]]
* OneLastSmoke: Played with. It's hard to flick your lighter if you've cut all the tendons in your wrists.
* TheOphelia: Angela's twin sister. She even commits suicide in a swimming pool.
* OtherworldlyAndSexuallyAmbiguous: TildaSwinton played the ArchangelGabriel.
* OurAngelsAreDifferent: Gabriel is the winged (androgynous) humanoid variety, but likely not a pure angel, since angels and demons are not allowed on Earth. Constantine himself says to Gabriel earlier in the movie- "[...] You're the one that deserves to go to Hell, half-breed," confirming this.
* PedestrianCrushesCar: At the beginning, when the Mexican man finds the Spear of Destiny, he walks onto a road and a car runs into him. The car is totaled, the man is unscathed.
* PokeInTheThirdEye: When Constantine is using The Chair to spy on the man possessed by the Spear of Destiny.
* PortalPool: Constantine states that any body of water, no matter how small, can be used as a portal to hell.
* PrecisionFStrike: Courtesy of one archangel Gabriel
* ProtectiveCharm: John's priest friend has one [[spoiler:but he foolishly didn't keep it on when getting deep in an investigation. Later, when it is given to Angela, she inadvertently removed it]].
* PsychicChildren: The title character and Isabel and Angela Dodson all first displayed their psychic abilities as children. Unfortunately, these abilities helped them to see the half-demons infesting the Earth, resulting in two of them being forced to undergo psychiatric treatment and later committing suicide.
* PublicDomainArtifact: The Lance of Longinus, AKA the Spear of Destiny.
* RealityHasNoSubtitles: While the little girl is possessed she screams "Papatayin natin silang lahat!" ("Let's kill them all!' in Tagalog). The audience is not told what this means.
* RedEyesTakeWarning: The demonic halfbreeds.
* RefusingParadise: Forced, and thereby possible subverted. [[spoiler: The dying main character is about to enter heaven, when the devil deliberately heals him to make sure he has another chance at messing up his salvation on earth.]]
* RetCanon: A ''Hellblazer'' story acknowledges the existence of Keanu's Constantine in an AlternateUniverse.
* RetiredBadass: Papa Midnite, a magi so powerful that he took on 30 demons by himself. Doesn't need special tools as he has actual magical powers. And powerful enough to create his own embassy of neutrality where hybrids mix and behave under his watch.
* ReligiousHorror
* ReroutedFromHeaven: [[spoiler:Inverted and then played straight. As John was a suicide since his youth, he was bound for Hell. But when he sacrificed his life and soul not just to stop the BigBad, but save the soul of one in hell, he is rerouted from Hell to Heaven. Not having this, John is resurrected and cured of his injuries by Satan, in the hopes that he'll screw up and get himself damned again]].
* {{Satan}}: Peter Stormare FTW.
* SaveTheWorldClimax: John Constantine is hired to investigate a suicide. In the end, he tries to stop a conspiracy to bring [[spoiler:the son of the Devil on Earth]].
* SchmuckBait: Constantine tells the men helping him to close their eyes and not look. One doesn't.
* SeeYouInHell: The "Go to Hell" version, when talking to the demonic halfbreeds.
* ShapeshiftingExcludesClothing: Balthazar after the BigBad reduces him to dust.
* {{Sidekick}}: Hennessy, Beeman and Chas Kramer.
* SlidingScaleOfAdaptationModification: The plot is loosely based on the ''Hellblazer'' story "Dangerous Habits". John's lung cancer, his argument with Gabriel (who exhibits more sympathy for him here),[[spoiler: and Satan ripping the tumors from John's body are all taken from the comic. Other similarities include Gabriel panicking when found out by God (John mentions that "He" isn't happy about his angel schmoozing with [[UsefulNotes/TheTroubles the IRA]]), John cutting his wrists, Satan's trail of slime, and John flipping him off at the end. ]]
* SlowElectricity: When Constantine and Angela Dodson are talking on the street, the streetlights begin to turn off (with clunking sounds) - first far away, then approaching them.
* SmokingIsCool: Subverted, as John gets lung cancer and later, as he quits [[spoiler:at the end of the movie (after Satan gets rid of the cancer)]].
* TheStinger: [[spoiler: Chas dies but is resurrected as an angel. Constantine's not exactly thrilled at this development.]]
* SuicideIsShameful: Suicide is deemed sinful enough to guarantee a soul a place in Hell, even if the attempt fails. [[spoiler:Subverted at the end, when Constantine's suicide is deemed a HeroicSacrifice and his soul is finally judged worthy of entering Heaven... until Lucifer screws him over.]]
* SummonBiggerFish: [[spoiler: Lucifer actually [[BadGuysDoTheDirtyWork saves the day]] because Constantine summoned him.]]
* SynchronizedSwarming: One bug demon can do this.
* TapOnTheHead: Constantine to the bar's bouncer the second time he goes there.
* ThanatosGambit: It probably would have worked had he not flipped Satan the bird.
%% TheyChangedItNowItSucks is already on YMMV
* ThirstyDesert: There is no water in Hell except what you bring with you in bottles or bodies.
* ThisIsForEmphasisBitch: Chas is happy to see the bouncer who kept him out get knocked down.
--> "Who's the rat in the dress now, huh, bitch?"
* TransformationOfThePossessed: The woman possessed by the soldier demon and [[spoiler:Angela Dodson]] when she's possessed by [[spoiler:Mammon, Lucifer's son]].
* TrenchcoatBrigade: Constantine. The actual John Constan-tyne is the TropeNamer for this one.
* TruceZone: Papa Midnite's bar was agreed to such a place by God and Satan.
* UtopiaJustifiesTheMeans: The BigBad plans to release [[spoiler:Mammon]] to bring pain and horror to humanity, in order to purify it and make it worthy of God's love.
--> '''[[spoiler:Gabriel]]''': So...I'll bring you ''pain''. I'll bring you ''horror''. So that you may rise above it. So that those of you who survive this reign of hell on Earth will be worthy of God's love.\\
'''John''': [[spoiler:Gabriel]]. You're '''[[InsaneTrollLogic insane]]'''.
* [[spoiler:VillainousRescue]]: As part of a last ditch effort, [[spoiler:John kills himself to summon ''Satan''. When he understands the whys, Satan saves the world because it is his job to destroy it]].
%% VisualEffectsOfAwesome is already on YMMV
* WhereDoesHeGetAllThoseWonderfulToys: Beeman manages to acquire certain rare objects for Constantine...for a price.
-->'''Beeman''': Yeah, easy there, hero. That's Dragon's Breath. \\
'''John Constantine''': I thought you couldn't get it anymore. \\
'''Beeman''': Yeah, well, I, uh, I know a guy who knows a guy.
* WingedHumanoid: Angels and half-demons.
%% WTHCastingAgency is already on YMMV
* TheWormThatWalks: The "true demon" that Constantine encounters (thereby letting him know that some MAJOR shit is going down) manifests as a swarm of insects of all shapes and sizes. [[CarFu It gets killed by a car.]]
* YouHaveOutlivedYourUsefulness: BigBad [[spoiler:Gabriel]] to his ally [[spoiler:Balthazar]].

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