->''Gangster Computer God worldwide '''SECRET CONTAINMENT POLICY''', made possible SOLY by worldwide Computer God Frankenstein Controls, especially LIFELONG CONSTANT THRESHOLD BRAIN WASH RADIO ( quiet and motionless, I can slightly hear it; repeatedly this has saved my life on the streets ). FOUR BILLION worldwide population ALL living have a Computer God CONTAINMENT POLICY BRAIN BANK BRAIN, A REAL BRAIN, in the Brain Bank Cities on the far side of the Moon, we never see.''
-->--'''[[http://www.bentoandstarchky.com/dec/containmentpolicy.htm Gangster Computer God Worldwide Secret Containment Policy]]'''

'''Francis E. Dec''', Esq. (1926-1996) was a U.S. lawyer, famous for collapsing into paranoid schizophrenia in the early sixties, henceforth living as a recluse and mass-mailing wild, paranoid typewriter-keyed rants around the country.

The SoBadItsGood inanity and downright hilarious insanity, as well as the all-caps, over-dramatic format of his rants have caused them to gain a CultClassic status.

Dec's rants detail a complicated (and often highly contradictory) universe-spanning conspiracy, presided over by the Worldwide Mad Deadly Communist Gangster Computer God, and involving MindControl of the whole human race, invisible cities on the far side of the moon, as well as pretty much every single non-Slavic race (Dec was a [[InvertedTrope Polish supremacist]], of all things). Common antagonists in Dec's life included [[PlotHole Jewish Nazis]], [[ImmediateSelfContradiction Communist-Catholic]] warrior monks with poison-coated swords and night vision goggles, and CIA-affiliated Ethiopian gangster perverts who had apparently covertly taken over Nassau County, NY for the purposes of [[AnalProbing anally abusing]] the populace while they slept. Seems legit, right?

Should you be interested in his creations, [[http://www.bentoandstarchky.com/dec/ the biggest fan-page is perhaps the place to start]].

!!The Deadly Worldwide Mad Gangster Communist Tropes that can be found within Dec's works include:
* AncientConspiracy
* BilingualBonus: Some of the rants contain snippets in broken Polish. Despite some raging anti-Semitism, he also liked to swear in Yiddish (or Yittish, as he called it).
* BoldInflation: Well, underline inflation, since they're written on a typewriter.
* CulturalPosturing: The Slovenic-Polish population were apparently the most ingenious race and the creators of all science and religion. The fact that Dec was of Polish-American heritage ''might'' have had something to do with it...
* EverythingTryingToKillYou: From "To all Judges":
-->''Deadly poison nerve gas smoke was sprayed at me from CIGARS, CIGARETTES and even from BALL-POINT PENS also from the WIG of a woman sitting next to me, even the Swiss cheese-type ice cubes were evaporating into poison nerve gas smoke in all of the "free" drinks! ''
** He was also concerned about random people--especially minorities--stabbing him with "deadly touch tabin needles", and remote control "deadly touch tarantula spiders".
* MindControl
* NinjaPirateZombieRobot: The [[WeAreEverywhere Worldwide]] [[MadGod Mad]] Deadly [[RedScare Communist]] [[RuthlessForeignGangsters Gangster]] [[DeusEstMachina Computer]] [[JerkassGods God]], most notably.
* ThroughTheEyesOfMadness: A RealLife example.
* WordSaladPhilosophy: To AbsurdityAscendant levels.