Now sorted by first fic they appear in.

[[folder:Real people]]
![[https://www.fanfiction.net/u/2936305/ MarissaTheWriter]]

->Hi, its me [=MarrissaTheWritar=], my goodl frend Creator/SueMary said I can use her tumbler to postd my new storay THE MARRISSA GAMES since the dum CRITAKS NITED is tryin to destory all my stuff on Website/FanFictionDotNet.

Doombly's alter ego here is your typical fanfiction nut who is only ever acquainted with half of her source works, [[CloudCuckooLander has the approximate reasoning of a three-year-old child]] and [[RougeAnglesOfSatin who is lucky if she can get a D- from spelling classes]]. Add in the fact that while she is able to write longer stories than Creator/SueMary, they aren't necessarily better in plot or characterization, and are still smeared in the same kind of {{Gorn}} humor that Sue Mary loves writing about, and finish with a pinch of MarySue [[SelfInsert self-insertion]]. Now you know what is wrong with [=MarrissaTheWriter=]. And yes, you heard that right; she will even occasionally misspell her own nickname.

She has switched between a couple of sites, including Website/FanFictionDotNet, Website/{{Tumblr}} and Website/ArchiveOfOurOwn.


* CloudCuckooLander - As mentioned on the main page, Marrissa has some rather... odd ideas about things.
* CreatorBreakdown - [[invoked]] In later chapters, especially in TEEN FORTRESS 2, Marrissa becomes increasingly angry in her author's notes and the spelling will at those times [[{{Angrish}} get even worse than usual]]. She's also started writing in the various "Falmer Trolls" as some form a revenge, derailing the main story to work in things to annoy them. TEEN FORTRESS 2 also has even more nonsensical plot twits and a ''lot'' of {{Gorn}} compared to ITS MY LIFE!
* {{Expy}} - Shares many traits with [[Fanfic/LightAndDarkTheAdventuresOfDarkYagami D'arkYagam'i]]. Her SelfInsert MarySue OC lacks an OverlyLongName, she introduces LoadsAndLoadsOfCharacters who are either taken from canon or are her reviewers, has developed her stories into a shared universe, is familiar with TV Tropes and is writing a Literature/TheHungerGames crossover.
** In the Script/TelltaleFanficTheater3000 MST of Sue Mary stories, Doombly tells that "my goal for ITS MY LIFE! was to make a Portal “My Immortal written in the style of Dark Yagami”."
* GeniusDitz - Blog/TheHalfWorld blog points out several pieces of evidence that Marrissa might be [[TrollFic smarter than she lets on]].
-->With It’s My Life, it’s ridiculous right out the gate. The author slipped in an ''Literature/AtlasShrugged'' joke in chapter 1, and right after that followed it up by using Creator/AynRand’s name in place of the words “and ran”, which seems cleverer than your average terrible fanfic writer. It’s over-the-top and in-your-face crazy right from the beginning.

-->So, no, I don’t think there’s solid evidence that [=MarissaTheWriter=] is a troll, but I think behind the stupid Cloudcuckoolander mask is someone more intelligent than they’re letting on.
* SockPuppet - Of Doombly, who also has another SockPuppet, Creator/SueMary. Of course, when they join the same Tumblr blog, they're two different people à la Creator/SachaBaronCohen's characters.

Misspellings: [=MarrissaTheWriter, MarrissaTheWritar=]

![[http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2323369/ASBusinessMagnet ASBusinessMagnet / Business Man / Business Lady]]

->Stop cyrin dudes you shuld be happy becos seinor gradulashun is common up soon!

->What the hell? Me and Peeta is a ship? NOT IN A MILLION YEARS. I’M NOT GAY.[[note]]written before she came out as trans[[/note]]

So far, the only person to be mentioned in all the [=MarrissaTheWriter=] stories and, in a lot of respects, Marissa's second-in-command, to the point where she owns [[FanFic/ITSMYLIFEExpandedUniverse at least a couple of fanfics set in a distinct Marrissaverse]].

As she had followed the story before coming out as transgender, in a couple of stories she is mentioned as male. This in-story avatar of her briefly served as the Principal of Portal High School after Principal [=GLaDOS=] was killed. Later he married [[Blog/TheHalfWorld Skep]] and became a falmer troll, only to get a "divortion" and return to help Marrissa in the Hunger Games as part of her prep team. He is later revealed to hate the Flamer Trolls because [[Blog/TheHalfWorld Skepkitty]] makes him pay child support for their son in foster care, "Skepness Man". Later it turns out he is also the father of Caroline, and incriminates her for publishing nudes of herself on Website/MySpace.

* HeelFaceRevolvingDoor: Business Man started out as a friendly principal, then joined the falmer trollz in ''Fanfic/InvaderZimBornAgainChristian'', then defected back to being a good guy prior to The Marrissa Games. (His FaceHeelTurn was acknowledged by Marrissa despite it having happened in a separate universe; apparently the falmer trollz are an intercontinuity faction.)
* LoveMakesYouEvil: His love for [[Blog/TheHalfWorld Skepkitty]] was what made Business Man go bad in the first place. [[TeacherStudentRomance Guess it didn't matter much that she was a student when Business Man was the principal]], [[FridgeLogic and got eaten by Scot's brothers at graduation.]] Or that in said alternate continuity, they were turned into one person then killed, and their baby christened.
** Or that they both are trans.
* NegativeContinuity: Business Man's activities since TEEN FORTRESS 2 appear to be from FanFic/InvaderZimBornAgainChristian, which Marrissa insisted was in a separate continuity. Even if [=IZBAC=] ''was'' in this continuity it still wouldn't make sense, as Business Man is killed and fused with Skepkitty to become "Skepness Man", who was then killed by [[ComicBook/JohnnyTheHomicidalManiac Nny]].
** In addition, once Business Lady is first mentioned, she is never referred to as "Business Man" again.

![[http://www.fanfiction.net/u/3150339/Logic_Editor Logic Editor]] (real name Matthew Riggs)

->WASSUP G'S? It's ya boy, Logic!

Marrissa's beta reader during ''TEEN FORTRESS 2''. He has currently beta-read Chapters 7 to 9 of ''TEEN FORTRESS 2'', and was working on an M-rated "better" version of ''ITS MY LIFE!''. However, Marrissa disliked what Logic did to her story, and Logic himself had disappeared off the Internet. He did make a return, and became a Homestuck fan, but claimed he will not edit ''THE MARRISSA GAMES''. He was a cool editor, though.

His depiction in ''TEEN FORTRESS 2'' is the Maths teacher after Mr. Sanpe was assassinated, as told above.


* IKEAErotica - Logic added a sex scene, even though Marrissa was against it.
* TheMole - Even though he's "working for" Marrissa, he let slip his Skepkitty fandom while beta-reading Chapter 9. He even wrote chatting with Skep (who turned out to be a bully further in the original story) into the chapter.

Misspellings: Logik Edtor

!Reel fans


Presumably sarcastic, these reviewers of ITS MY LIFE! seem to praise the story and are the only reason Marrissa keeps writing ITS MY LIFE!.

This group, according to Marrissa herself, comprises of "Not" Cat Bountry with the DramaticReading and Selphuerel, who has done nothing other than praising the story with the reviews. (Though, Cat Bouncy recently has quit praising the story, and is not reading TEEN FORTRESS 2.) Among the other notable fans of the story is also Arrow-Awesome with [[RecursiveFanfiction two fan stories]] ''[[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7187436/1/MarissaxChell MarissaxChell]]'' and ''Portla 3'' (sadly lost forever).

!Falmer trollz

->I gloped Wheatly an gave lots of hug an kisses while CAROLINE (See I listen to constertive crit instead of FALMER TROLLZ)

These reviewers are the [[OnlySaneMan Only Sane Men]] within this whole mess, and, [[CaptainObvious obviously]], are being of a bad opinion about the fic. Notable people belonging to this faction are Tropers/{{Skepkitty}} of Blog/TheHalfWorld, the members of Script/TelltaleFanficTheater3000 and the other [=MSTers=], as well as bad reviewers.

They first got a cameo as a gang of bullies that failed their graduations and were eaten quite unceremoniously. Since then, they have continued to be either main or side villains.

It should be noted that this term is in fact interchangeable with "[[ConstructiveCriticism consertive critisim]] guys", because they could tell the problems with the story more loosely and be regarded as trolls.

!!Critics United

->CRITICS YOUNTIED -A groop of flmer trollz hoo did sterods an got superpowaed up so now theys even wores than the reglar ones! Wif tehere Preisent Snow they taked over the hole plase an a reely meen.

A group of "law enforcers" of [=FanFiction.Net=], who removed ITS MY LIFE! from the site. They are taking the role of the Capitol in THE MARRISSA GAMES.

![[https://www.fanfiction.net/u/998182/ Doombly]]

The real [[TheManBehindTheMan Man Behind The Man]]. However, his appearances in Marrissa's stories were limited to a single acknowledgement in ''Real Beauty''.


[[folder:ITS MY LIFE!]]


!!Marrissa Roberts

->Why cant I jus be a normal girl going to high school an have a boyfriend that isn’t space lost!

->MARRISSA ROBERTS - Im Chells sister but more hot an pretty. I have spesal powers gived to me by the ingineer lick space fly an brething! Aso I have detektive power an MAGA PAWNCH an electic stuff. Im merried to Wheatly an we have a dotter named Chell Junor in onor of my dead sister.

A MarySue protagonist, Marrissa Roberts starts out as a test subject within "Portal Labs" until Glaods reveals that she is in fact Chell's sister with speshul powers and promptly sewisides. Then Marrissa starts gradually fucking up the entire ''Portal'' canon and the entire ''world'' which is ultimately turned into a battle arena between her and ''her evil clone''.


* BackFromTheDead: Dies in chapter 12, returns just one chapter after.
* NewPowersAsThePlotDemands
* PregnantBadass: Throughout ITS MY LIFE!.
* SelfInsert

Misspellings: [[AllThereInTheManual Marrisa Robers]], Marissa, Marrisser, Marrisssa


->You bloody sod stop oh god save the queen!

->WHEATLY THE ROBO BALL - Wheetly is my hubby an we luve eachotter very much. He gotted arms an legs now from that JERK BOBOT Altass dead body copse. Sum JERKS thank hes dum but Wheatlys not, hes relay brave an is POWERFUL BAD ARSE becos hes got the power of love!

Marrissa's love interest, Wheetly is a robot ball in charge of the "relax hotel" before ascending to power and being shot into space by Chell. From there Glados and Marrissa find him and Marrissa brings him back to Portal Labs, where he is involved in a love trangle between Marrissa and Chell, teams up with Atlas and P-Body against Marrissa and dies. From there Marrissa brings his past self to the furture and eventually with Chell dying Whaatly merries Marrissa and they have a robot ball-human hybrid child.


* ADayInTheLimelight: Two chapters of ITS MY LIFE! and one of TEEN FORTRESS 2 are written from Wheelty's POV, but that should not be taken as a sign of good writing: (From Blog/TheHalfWorld [=MSTing=])
-->Wheatley’s POV is worse than Marissa’s. Not only do we have to endure the OOC-ness and the misuse of British slang, we also have to endure the Sue getting praised.
** And now, there is a fic where he is the main character, and Marrissa largely does not appear at all.
* DidNotDoTheBloodyResearch
* PowerOfLove - He is reliant on this throughout ''ITS MY LIFE!'', while he's unaware that he's [[spoiler:Harry Potter]]. After he discovers that, though, he is as much of a badass as Marrissa.

Misspellings: Wheetly, Whaatly, Wheelty



This fic's take on Chell is a brain-damaged woman on whose head the only thought is [[WesternAnimation/SymBionicTitan booty-quaking]] (though, upon becoming a zombie she seems to be smarter and the whole brain damage thing may be orchestrated by [=GLaDOS=]). However, minus brain damage, she is a fairly nice woman and knows that [=GLaDOS=] is evil.

Misspellings: Cheel, Schell


->Silly CHELLGADOS you cannt hurt me becos… IVE GOT BALLS OF STEEL!

->RAT MAN - A guy hoo fites the bad robots lick [=GLaDOS=] an ATLAS AN P-POTY! He replased his man thingys wif BALLS OF STEEL an was lost in spase an died or is he? Winkwhinkstoryplotdevelop

The author of the eponymous "the cake is a lie" phrase, Ratman is a rebel soldier of [=GLaDOS=] and the fusion [=CHELLGaDOS=] until Marrissa came back from the future.


* BallsOfSteel: Complete with a reference to VideoGame/DukeNukemForever. The balls themselves are "Space and Rick cores".
* LukeIAmYourFather: Just before being shot into space, Ratman tells a story about how Gabe Jonson couldn't have children with [=GLaDOS=] normally ([[YouFailLogicForever even though Marrissa and Wheatly can]]) and instead made Marrissa and Chell artificially, but DNA was all mixed up and Ratman's DNA was used instead of Gabe's for one of the tubes, which would mean Ratman is in fact Chell's biological father.

Misspellings: Rtaman, Rat Man
!!Oracle Turrent

->No im diffrent! I am Oracle Turrent an I no how to make Marrissa alife!

A fairly knowledgeable self-aware turrent, Oracle Turrent knows of Marrissa's speshul powers and aids Wheatly in Marrissa's ressurekshun. He then appears once more to get Marrissa and Wheatly married, but beyond that doesn't play a big role in things.

Misspellings: Orca Turrent

!!Chell Junor


->CHELL JUNOR - Me an [=WHeatlys=] robot ball/human baby. She is veray yung an doesnt do much yet. Mayeb she has my powors? Lol, I havent desided yet.

Marrissa and Wheatly's child. Besides being half-human, half-robot ball, not much is known about her yet. Riley is quick to meet up with her in ''ITS MY LIFE!: THE FLAMES AWAKENS''.


* {{Cyborg}} - Presumably.
* DeadGuyJunior
* HalfHumanHybrid
* ShipTease - In 2012, despite being still a baby in her depictions, she has already been shipped with Skepness Man. Surely enough, [[FanFic/ITSMYLIFEExpandedUniverse the Expanded Universe]] delivered.




->[=GLaDOS=] - She is teh biggest mean dum goth emo computer women ever!!!212 I killed her fourever an dhw was defeeted an killt by the zomboys from Dead Space.

In this verse, [=GLaDOS=] is the evil computer system who, upon learning her origins, becomes a "{{goth}} {{emo}}" who listens to [[Music/AvrilLavigne Avril Lavinge]] and [[Music/MyChemicalRomance My Kemical Romace]] and attempts sewisiding. However, she doesn't quite succeed, is sent to Adroid Hell and returns, and starts causing more mess.

* BackFromTheDead
* [[DrivenToSuicide Driven to Sewiside]]: She kills herself by "cutting" when she learns her origins. In chapter 1. She got better, and, throughout the series, focuses a lot of her murder instincts on killing Marrissa instead.
* {{Gasshole}}: In chapter 5 of IT'S MY LIFE!, she pumps the room with "icky green farts".

Misspellings: Glados, Glaods, Gladoss, GLADOS, [=GlaDOS=], [=GLadOS=], [=GLados=], Glads, [=GLaDON=], [=GLaDOES=], [=GLaDS=], [=GLADS=]

!!Atlas and P-Boy/P-Body

->Hi b**[=**=] we are here to test you.

->ATLAS AN P-POBDY - To JERK ROBOTS who aer always smokin drugs an beer an being JERKS. I killed them fourever affer they shot me in the hed.

->ATBOD AN P-LAS - Altas an P-Bobys good guy kids. P-Body did a abortion becos she isnt pro-life the b*** I thot but gess not! Tehy are good frends of Haymatch.

These robots are given an entirely different backstory in ITS MY LIFE! from the canonical works. It's explained that in the past Marrissa accidentally left drugs and beer with them, turning them into jerks who became obsessed with beating her up and eventually ''killed'' her.

Two robots, named Atbod and P-Las, who are "good guys", claim to be Atlas and P-Body's kids. However Demoman gives them drugs and beer, causing them to turn into jerks and become friends with Haymitch Abernathy. As it turns out, however, they were Atlas and P-Boy under disguise.


* BackFromTheDead
* DrugsAreBad: A living example.
* GenerationXerox: Double-subverted. Atbod and P-Las ''claim'' to be good child versions of Atlas and P-Boy, but in reality both pairs were [[FaceHeelTurn given drugs and beer]], time-travel and make a friend who starts drinking (Wheatley for Atlas and P-Boy, Haymitch Abernathy for Atbod and P-Las).
* [[ThisIsForEmphasisBitch This is for Emphasis, B***!]]

Misspellings: Altas, Atals, P-Boy, P-Bod, P=boy, [-Body, P=Body, P-bODY, P-Doy, P-Boyd, Pboy

!!Andord Hell zombies

A bunch of zomboys left in Androod Hell, including the big zombie boss from Resident Evil. They are mostly [[SealedEvilInACan forgotten for most of the story]] until Assirram opens a portal to Andord Hell and uses the zombies as her own army in taking over the world.


* SealedEvilInACan


->Marrissa Roberts you have interfeared with my plans for the last time becos now I will kill you.

Chell's and [=GLaDOS's=] fusion after Chell's butt was sliced off and [=GLaDOS=] decided to install her head into where Chell's butt was, making this more evil than ever fusion.


* SplitPersonality - While the [=GLaDOS=] part is noticeably the one in control, Chell briefly takes over to reassure Marrissa that she needs to be killed.
* TakeAThirdOption - When Marrissa faces a dilemma of whetter [=CHELLGaDOS=] needs to live or die, she decides to make a black hole and only take [=GLaDOS's=] pieces out. [[spoiler:However, Chell has suffered fatal damage from being fused with [=GLaDOS=] and dies shortly thereafter.]]

Misspellings: CHELLGAODS

!!Assirram Strebor

->I am an evil clone made to kill you Marrissa Roberts an take over the werld!

Marrissa's evil clone made by the evil Teen Fortress 2 to go to the future and kill Marrissa, Assirram shortly after being made changes her plans to taking over the whole world and Marrissa is the only person who can stop her.


* EvilKnockoff

Misspellings: Assiram, Assram


[[folder:Past sections of ITS MY LIFE! and TEEN FORTRESS 2]]

Tropes general to the past:

* AnachronismStew and PurelyAestheticEra - Involves at least some of the elements of:
** 19th century: UsefulNotes/AbrahamLincoln is the president.
** TheGreatDepression
** TheEighties: Cyndi Lauper's "Girls Just Want to Have Fun".
** TheNineties: The main events of ''Literature/HarryPotter'', as well as the activation of [=GLaDOS=], are believed to be in this period of time.
** TurnOfTheMillennium: Website/MySpace.


!!Gabe Jonson and Caroline

->'''Marrissa:''' My hose blowed up cold I stay with wonna you?
->'''Caroline:''' OK we can be lick sisters!

Gabe Jonson (who eventually renamed himself to Cave "in onor of his dead brother") and Caroline were students of "Portal High School" until future Marrissa and Wheatly came over, and Marrissa's and Chell's adoptive parents. They (for high school students) are fairly rich, judging by the fact that Caroline has her own commode and a double-sized bed, while Gabe can afford to build a super-advanced AI in his house over an afternoon.

Later, Gabe Jonson died only to be rescued from Androd Hell by Marrissa only to be killed by her powers, and Caroline was turned into [=GLaDOS=] and corrupted by a computer virus by Assirram, making a full-fledged FaceHeelTurn.

Misspellings: Cabe Jonson, Gave, Karolin, Karlion, Karlin, Karlins, Karoline, Karolen, Carolion, Carlines, Carlion

!!(Good) Teen Fortress 2

->'''Heevy:''' These are my frends, we all has cool niknames they are: Scot, Spy, Solder, Medik, Sniper, Demonman, Piro an Ingineer.

Gabe Jonson's friends at the senior grade of Portal High School, they really are nothing more than a team of nine characters (however, it is never mentioned if they are RED or BLU [[spoiler:until the end of ''TEEN FORTRESS 2'', when "Redman and Bluman" approach them, saying that Bluman would recruit them and "Redman" would clone them]]) from ''Team Fortress 2''. They are able to fight on their own, and are fairly smart.

They are later sent [[spoiler:by Redman and Bluman]] to Half-Life College to study so that they can work as recruits, but their education is interrupted by President Abraham Lincoln, who wants them to help Marrissa in the Games she is participating in.

Misspellings: Teen Fortes 2, Teen Tortes 2, Teen Fortres 2, Heevy, Solder, Medik, Demonman, Demomon, Demonaman, Demoan, Ingineer, Ingine, Snipper, Snaper, nIper, Sniepr

!!! Scot "Scout" Parker

Scot is the class in [=TF2=] the author considers the most important, and the main character of the "TEEN FORTRESS 2" fan fic.

Not much is known about him, but what Marrissa told about him contradicts what Valve told about him: he is described as a dog/human hybrid from "Florda" (instead of Boston, Massachusetts) whose eight (rather than seven in the canon) brothers [[ADogAteMyHomework were always eating his homework]] and forcing him to do theirs. He also had a girlfriend "Katty Smithereens" who was named after Marrissa's real life friend of the same name, owns a baseball bat [[ICallItVera nicknamed "Marrissa"]] and escapes from his house to the Portal High School after killing his oldest brother "Wulf". [[spoiler:He dies in THE MARRISSA GAMES performing a [[HeroicSacrifice heroic "sakrifase"]] to avenge the death of Pyro.]]


* [[spoiler:[[HeroicSacrifice Heroic Sakrifase]]]]
* ICallItVera - Scot names his baseball bat Marrissa, and doesn't know why, because the reason is actually in the future.
** That also means we have Marrissa the Author/"Writer", Marrissa the Character and Marrissa the Baseball Bat.

Misspellings: Scoot

!!! Tanya "Pyro" Lockwood

Pyro is called the second most important class of [=TF2=], and is Scout's girlfriend.

It is revealed that she is in fact a girl in Chapter 2, when Scot [[AccidentalPervert accidentally enters the wrong bathroom]] and sees one of the naked girls putting on a suit. She and Scot then become lovers. [[spoiler:She died in THE MARRISSA GAMES, taking the place of the girl who once lit a fire in the night and was tracked down by the Careers.]]

Misspellings: Piro, Pryo

!!! Katty Smithereens

A escaped zoo Koala that Sniper and Scot find while walking to school. Sniper decides to keep Katty as a pet and Scot names her "in onor of his dead girlfriend". Katty can apparently speak to Sniper because he's Australian and thus knows koala language somehow...


* TeamPet

!!! Spy

Spy is madly in love with Caroline and attempts to rape her and is expelled. Later he returns to save Caroline from Cave Jonson but fails and in utter despair [[spoiler: commits "sewiside"]].

He is also described as having a hideously deformed face full of "cancerous plimples, greesy marks, a brand that says "SLOOT" an experimental hair".


* [[DrivenToSuicide Driven to Sewiside]]
* [[spoiler:FateWorseThanDeath - [[WesternAnimation/{{Futurama}} He was resurrected as his head.]]]]
* FaceHeelTurn - Originally supposed to be part of the "good guys", still is portrayed as evil while he courts Caroline.

!!! Other classes

Other classes are less important and detailed, but several facts are given about them:

* Ingineer is the smartest guy among of Teen Fortress 2. He passed the time travel exam and is capable of building a time machine.
* Heevy's gun "Sasa" was raped by football players in the past, which makes him fight against any rape he sees.
* Snipper is Scot's best friend, and they live together after Scot escaped from his hose. He has a pet koala named "Katty Smithereens".
* Solder had a sort-of-girlfriend Jenny Weasley, however it turned out she was an undercover agent from Britain on a mission to "assinate" Mr. Sanpe. She left him once Sanpe was killed.
* Demoman also has a girl with a similar status, [[WesternAnimation/InvaderZim Gaz]], who was close to breaking up after she was annoyed that he was addicted to "drugs and beer", but Scot managed to fix him and they went back to being lovers.

!!Ratman (the past)

In the past, Ratman was working with Gabe Jonson after he renamed himself to Cave, and helped him build [=GLaDOS=].


* GroinAttack: Cave Jonson roundhouse kicks Rattmann in his "man place" which causes [[{{Gorn}} his testicles to explode covering Scout and Pyro in their remains]]. This is why he [[BallsOfSteel replaced his balls with the Space and Rick cores.]]

!!Wheatly (the past)

Wheatly was originally [[Literature/HarryPotter a guy from Britain named Harry]], who had a girlfriend Jenny who was sent to Portal High School to kill Mr. Sanpe. During the course of the events he went undercover, changed his name to Wheatly, and altered his appearance to "tall with blond hare an gassses an like nerd" but got amnesia and forgot his name was ever Harry, which followed him being turned into a robo ball and sent to the future.


* [[spoiler:BrainInAJar - When he is turned into a robot, he is not much more than his head in an elaborate metal casing.]]


->“Oh wems this is badder than thot. We most help Marrissa but how.” Abraman Liknan (AN ITS THE PAST REMBER SO HE CAN PRESDENT)

The President of the United States during "the past". He has awarded Marrissa, Teen Fortress 2, Ratmann and Gabe Johnson medals for their acts of bravery in ITS MY LIFE! and keeps a keen interest in Marrissa. Currently he is using [[Film/MenInBlack Agents J and K]] to watch over her in the future.


* AnachronismStew - He's the president in a time period with computers and televisions, Ferraris and Music/MileyCyrus (but not Music/JustinBieber or Film/BackToTheFuture).


!!Cave Jonson and Evil/"Bad" Teen Fortress 2

->I am CAVE JONSON who is GABE JONSONS more evil twin!

Gabe Jonson's EvilTwin and his self-made clones of Team Fortress 2, these are the main antagonists of the events taking place in the past.

Misspellings: Cabe Joneson


!!Portal High School teachers

Only three teachers from Portal High School were ever named:

* a History teacher Mr. Pursell who is described as "dumb" and blushes from love notes directed to someone else; Chapter seven implies that he is actually Steve Purcell, creator of SamAndMax.
* a Math teacher [[Literature/HarryPotter Mr. Sanpe]] [[ShoutOut (lol)]] who is given a slightly longer backstory: he used to be a teacher in Britain but he killed the principal and escaped the judgment so he came to teach at Portal High School and changed his name [[spoiler:only to be killed by Jenny Weasley]]. He therefore was very pissed off at everyone, especially hermaphrodites, and used to give Scot a lot of F's;
* another Math teacher, "Mr. Logik Edtor" / Mr. Logik, who does not hurl abuse at the students, but [[EverybodyHatesMathematics fails to make the class interesting]].


* TwoTeacherSchool

!!Principal [=GLaDOS=]

->We ran lick I did in Meet the Scot an jumped over other pepole but then somethin stoped us dead in are tracks it was… PRINSIPAL GLADOS!

The first seen principal of Portal High School. She is revealed to be Caroline's mother and the idea for the name of Caroline's robotic body. She was killed by "Dog the Bownty Hunner" shortly after making an appearance, and was replaced by the [[FanFic/PortalThe4thMillenniumFranchise Business Magnet/"Man",]] who has an entry above.

Misspellings: PRINSIPAL GLADOS, [=Princinipal GLaDOS=], [=Primpal GLaDOS=]



!Primrose Everdeen

->PRIMOSE EVERGREEN - A yung gilr hoo is been pikked for the Hunger Games. Seh has a petted gote an cat an has inner strenth that u dont wanna mess with!

One of two female tributes of District 12 for the Hunger Games, the other being Marissa herself. She is apparently cute, but never as cute as Chell Junior or Marissa when she was her age.

!Peeta Peeta Sandwich Eater

->PEETA PITA SANDWICH EATA - Hes a hot guy (but I dont lick him lick that my hart only belongs to Wheatly) an the guy Hunger Game. Theres a spesal sumwon hes lookin out for!

The male tribute of District 12 for the Hunger Games. Marissa constantly alludes to liking him, but being unable to cheat on Wheatley. [[spoiler:He eventually hooks up with Prim.]]

!Katniss Everdeen

->KANTISS EVERGREEN - Primp’s olderer sister. Shes a dumb an has feekal incontinence so nobody licks her.

Appeared in one scene to try and volunteer for Prim, only for President Snow to reveal she can't because of fecal incontinence. Her incident is frequently referred to later. She is later revealed to have been [[spoiler:kidnapped by "Vass from ''VideoGame/FarCry3''" and sold as a "sexing slave in Asian".]]

!Gale Thunderpants

->GALE (I FORGOTE HIS LAST NAME SORRY =( -Kanisss best frend. Hes hidin somethin an waht dose he want with Wheatly?!?!?! FIND OT INSYDE!!@3

Same guy as Ronald Weasley. Mainly in the story to remind Wheatly/Harry of his past and help him realize his true powers so he can help Marrissa.


* BiTheWay - He's nervous around J an K because he fears their "sexay bodis" will make him cheat on his true love, "Hermoany".

!Agents J and K

->“Yes Mr. Prisedent Lincan we haf disvocered that Marrissa Robers is in Hunger Games troble!!” Deadpanned K wile J did a funny joke.

Previously having been members of the Film/MenInBlack, they now act as time traveling spies for President Lincoln to watch over Marrissa. They have been tasked with recruiting Teen Fortress 2 to rescue her from the Hunger Games. And they are dressing in red.


* ADayInTheLimelight - They star in chapter five (actually chapter seven) of THE MARRISSA GAMES, appropriately titled "J AN KS WUBULOS ADVENTURE".
* BerserkButton - K is ''very'' insistent that meat is supposed to be inside people, not [[VideoGame/AmnesiaTheDarkDescent growing on walls]].

!President Snow

->PIESENDENT SNOW - Teh baddest dude ever! Hes the liter of Crits Unitary an the pres of the plase. He hates Marrissa for some reson an he has a BIG seekrit!!12

Critics United's PresidentEvil, and replaces Effie Trinket in the Reapings, even though Effie appears later in the story.

!Haymitch Abernathy

->HAYMISH ABERNATY - Da mentor for me an Prime an Peeta Peeta Sandwich Eater in the GAMES. A reel JERK hoos always druggin an beerin wif hes noo frens ATBOD AN PLAS.

Presumably a victor of the Quarter Quell, assuming the games in Marissa's version are even numbered. Instead of mentoring Marrissa, Prim and Peeta, he "drugs an beers" with ATLAS and P-body, at least until he sees the three fighting fairly well.


* HeelFaceTurn
* NakedOnArrival: He is introduced while having sex with "Louise Boombooms the 2".

!Sweary Guy

->What the buggerin f*** p*** g*** b*** c*** are u bullockin done heer f***888?

One of the tributes for the Hunger Games, despite being an old man. [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin He swears a lot]].


* {{Cameo}}: ''Eventually'' confirmed to be [[Series/TheThickOfIt Malcolm Tucker]].
-->It’s probably the most obscure character I’ve used in any fanfiction, serious or trollfic.

-->By the way, no one has come even close to figuring out who Sweary Guy is...
* SirSwearsALot

!Captian Whip Whitaker

->Oh man I am soooo hi on drugs an beer!!3

A drug and beer addicted pilot and old friend of Haymitch's. He was hired by President Snow to stop Haymitch from helping Marrissa win the Hunger Games.


* {{Cameo}}: He is a completely OOC version of Captain William "Whip" Whitaker from {{Film/Flight}}.
* HeelFaceRevolvingDoor
* [[spoiler:ReverseMole]]
* TheMole: He's secretly working for President Snow.
* TheStoner: Whip is unable to see out his airplane's windows due all the "drug smoke" in the cockpit.

Misspellings: Wip, Wipe

!Other tributes

Several other tributes are featured in THE MARRISSA GAMES:

* the original Falmer Trollz ([[Blog/TheHalfWorld Skepkitty]] + Script/TelltaleFanficTheater3000);
* Cato the huge bipedal cat; [[spoiler:he is later burned horribly and becomes "[[IncrediblyLamePun Freddy Cougar]]"]]
* "Roo" the half-kangaroo;
* Glummer, mainly used in a very disturbing scene where she [[spoiler:mistakes a tracker jacker nest for a tampon]];
* Fresh, mentioned by Haymish to be a serious threat and
* Fawkesface/Fauxfeces, who is a Career and has only been seen together with Glummer before the Games.

Notably, Teen Fortress 2 also appears in the Games, but not as reaped tributes; instead they claim they're from District 3 and the Gamemakers kill off the real District 3 tributes before the Games.



![[VideoGame/BioShockInfinite Robot and Roslalonde Lettuce]]

->'''Roslalonde:''' To be are apprentise yull have to don much more diffulct misshuns.
->'''Robot:''' Yay / [[WhoShotJFK Lick the time we had to kill JFK]].

In the past, they worked on a portal machine, but it exploded, allegedly killing them. Now, they appear to exist wherever they want, and conduct a plot that is pretty much known only to them.


* GenderBlenderName - Robot Lettuce is actually "Marrissa Roberts Lettuce". Turns out, the more well-known Marrissa Roberts was named after him.
* {{Transflormation}} - At one point, they take the form of actual lettuce.

!Skepness Man Lettuce

->Skepness Man notted an put on his time mashine jet pack."

The child of Skepkitty and Business Man. While he has a minor appearance in ''THE MARRISSA GAMES'' as a child, here he takes on a more major role, being Robot and Roslalonde's apprentice.


* CanonImmigrant - Despite being originally conceived by Doombly, he still takes a lot of clues from his [[FanFic/ITSMYLIFEExpandedUniverse Expanded Universe]] counterpart, Skepness Man Beauregarde.
* MyOwnGrampa - He is the kid of Business Man and Skepkitty, who is the kid of himself and Jenny Weasley.
* ParentalSubstitute - He considers Robot and Roslalonde to be his parents, and even takes on their last name. Although Robot and Roslalonde do not reciprocate, they did go to a mission where they ''pretended'' to be his parents.

!Bertha Boombooms

->What are u lossers doin here?

Portal High School's AlphaBitch (with Marissa outright naming this trope, albeit as "Alfa B**[=**=]"). She is introduced as one of the main antagonists of ''THE KILL OF SNAPE''; however, Wheatly quickly puts her to her place once he reveals her much more sinister plans.


* BackstabbingTheAlphaBitch - She is eventually [[DrivenToSuicide driven to sewiside]] by Wheatly.

!Gobo Fraggle

The new principal of Hogwarts after Dumbldeore's death. [[spoiler:He turns out to be the main villain of ''THE KILL OF SNAPE'', being responsible for ideas such as turning Wheatly to a robot, and sewing all other Hogwarts students into a [[Film/TheHumanCentipede Hogwarts Centipede]].]]

!Iggy and Huey

Snape's goons. After Wheatly and Jenny leave Hogwarts, under Gobo Fraggle's rule, they go completely insane and end up molesting Hogwarts pretty bad.

Like Sweary Guy, they are also from a rather obscure work of fiction. However, Doombly hasn't named it yet.



![[WesternAnimation/InsideOut Riley Andorsen]]

At the age of 12, she already managed to make up her name. In her mind, Sadness broke the Headquarters' console, giving Riley "emoshun powers", with which she absolutely wrecked her own iteration of the Hunger Games.


* ArtisticLicenseGeography - Rather than being from Minnesota and moving to San Francisco, she is actually from Chicago and moves to District 12.

![[Characters/UndertaleSans Sans]] and [[Characters/UndertalePapyrus Pappyras]]

The skeletons that used to belong to Atlas and P-Body, as according to Marissa's logic, skeletons have independent personalities from the flesh and blood (or metal, in this case) surrounding them. They are quickly recruited by Skepkitty while he is forming his falmer army.



Return to [[FanFic/{{ITSMYLIFE}} ITS MY LIFE!]].