* Manny tries to impress a girl the entire episode to no avail. Then, he saves her from a deflating moonbounce and THEN goes back in to save her balloon animal. THEN he tells the camera that she called him three times that night and he thinks she is smothering him.
* "This is one clown who's going to KICK YOUR ASS!"
* Santa punching out a Jerkass caroler
--> '''Cameron:''' [[BrokenAesop What about forgiveness?]]
--> '''Santa:''' You were nice, he's naughty
* Haley's BatmanGambit to win the "no electronics" contest. She really isn't as dumb as she seems.
** Successfully pulling an IndyPloy KarmaHoudini after Alex catches her dead to rights faking having a job.
* Cameron's "the sticks were in the wrong hands" drum solo.
* Gloria sandbagging Jay's attempt to get out of a shopping day with Pepper.
* Phil confronting Jay about his constant deriding of Phil's masculinity, saying he's proven it many times over, and if Jay still has a problem that Phil married his daughter, that's on him.
** Made so much better by Jay finally giving Phil a nod of respect when he wasn't looking.
* Phil walking a tightrope seven feet off the ground.
* Alex tearing down the Christmas tree salesman when he (supposedly) insulted Mitchell.
* Mitchell tackling the guy who stole Haley's money.
* Alex: "You have your fans, I have mine. And one day, your fans are going to work for my fans."
* Luke's TheReasonYouSuckSpeech to Haley and Alex about how they're both equally bad sisters.
* Luke and Phil guilt-tripping the realtor who stole Phil's listing.
* Gloria wrecking Haley's plan for a degenerate party while also getting Manny to loosen up. "Two birds, one bullet."
* Almost everything Jay does in the Disneyland episode. Anything that isn't a MomentOfAwesome is a CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming.
* Claire's punishment for Haley getting drunk at the prom: getting her to drink a bunch of gross stuff blended together on the pretense of it being a hangover cure.
* Phil, after playing the nice parent opposite Claire for Haley's whole life, finally explodes at her when she's arrested at a frat party and doesn't even apologize to them. Then he storms out, and Claire follows to get him a well-earned waffle after he's had nothing to eat all day.
* Phil beating Jay in a boxing match, releasing all his frustration he had with him about not respecting him.
* Phil taking of his and all his kids problems that day just like Michael Corleone in ''TheGodfather'' while he becomes godfather to Jay and Gloria's new baby at his baptism.
* After a whole episode of Alex's new band being talked down as a dull classical music group, it turns out they're some kind of ''alternate rock'' band, in which Alex's cello playing fits perfectly, and she even sings.
* Cam turns on "The Dancing Waters" at the end of "The Wow Factor". Which then becomes doubly awesome by becoming a CrowningMomentOfFunny when they realize the water intakes are sucking in the goldfish, then spraying them all over the lawn.
* Phil, Claire and Cam finally selling the house the latter two fixed up at the end of "Flip Flop", with Phil getting to stick it Gil Thorp in the process.
* Alex setting off fireworks at her grandmother's funeral, with a lighter the grandmother stole from Paul Newman.
* After Cam and Mitchell [[ItMakesSenseInContext accidentally give Lily too much money as the Tooth Fairy]], they hatch several unsuccessful schemes to get her to give the money back, eventually getting Haley to dress up as the Tooth Fairy. When that plan fails as well, Haley manages to manipulate Lily into returning the money by convincing her that if she keeps it, Santa will see what she did, all without missing a beat. Pretty quick thinking for the less intelligent of the Dumphy sisters.
* Phil and Claire were attempting to reschedule the kids' summertime activities to give themselves more time alone at home. But they first needed to get all three to agree without knowing the true reason. Phil goes to Alex and uses a combination of sympathy and her fear of ending up like Haley (lounging around the house with no goals in life) to get her to switch. He then tries to sweet-talk Haley (who was going on a beach trip with friends), who immediately guesses the real reason for his request. She attempts to leverage Phil with more concessions... but then he shuts her down completely with a threat to cancel her trip altogether, making her appear as the "uncool friend" and eventually ending up like Alex. Haley immediately backs down. Awesome in that Phil changed tactics without missing a single beat and outmanuevered Haley, who thought she had been holding all the cards in the deal. And using both sisters' rivalry against each other? Priceless.
* Phil, Luke, and Manny successfully reassembling an antique Apollo 13 model.
* Haley revealing that all the time she's been spending in her room taking selfies has actually been [[spoiler:setting up a clothing business that's already making a bunch of money.]]
** And in another episode not long after, she gets to put the photos she's been taking in college into a special exhibit, [[spoiler: and even manages to sell one.]]
* Haley again, stepping up to the stage to accept her father's award at the realtors' banquet, then effortlessly seguing into doing his jokes and ''then'' telling everyone what an awesome dad he is (making it a CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming as well).
* Mitchell standing up to his jerkass boss in "Truth be Told".
* Haley yet again in "Express Christmas." She and Claire go to Target to buy presents; while Claire waits in the insanely long checkout line, Haley goes to use her considerable shopping skills to track down the last things on their list. The final item is a ladybug nightlight for Lily, but another man grabs the last one on the shelf before Haley can. She immediately [[ShowSomeLeg undoes a button on her blouse]] and starts walking over to him, but the man starts talking to his boyfriend on the phone, ruining that plan. What does Haley do next? She [[BavarianFireDrill follows an employee to the break room,]] [[PaperThinDisguise puts on a red shirt, khaki pants, and nametag]], then approaches the man and claims to be an employee, offering to bring his items to the register. She then quickly drops off the last items for Claire and heads off to change again. No one is the wiser.
* "The Day we Almost Died": A newly confident Phil goes to a house where Gil Thorpe is pitching a sale, exposes Gil as a sleazebag in front of his prospective clients, and hands the couple a list of legitimate realtors to use, as well as the number of an attorney to sue Thorpe once his promises fall apart. Finally:
-->'''Phil''': Oh by the way, if you ever speak disrespectfully again about my wife, I'll kill you. (beat) Sorry, that sounded like a joke. I will ''actually'' kill you.
* "Connection Lost" is told completely in video chats on Claire's computer. ''And it works.''
* A minor one, but when Mitchell and Cam mistakenly think someone is in Lily's room, Cam [[PapaWolf immediately jumps out of bed, grabs a baseball bat, and rushes to the baby's room, ready to kick some ass.]]
-->'''Cameron:''' ''It's go time!''
* Manny "accidentally" kissing Haley. He shrugs at the camera, implying he planned the whole thing.
* Haley ''and'' Andy getting jobs, a fashion stylist and Phil's assistant, respectively.
* Gloria being able to [[ItMakesSenseInContext shoot a sippy cup with a pellet gun]] ''without looking''.
* After an episode of Mitch and Cam failing to get Lily in good graces with her school's AlphaBitch, Lily herself simply tells the girl to shut up, instantly making her the popular one.
* In "Phil's Sexy, Sexy House", Haley, after departing Phil's client's house, runs back inside, leaps into Andy's arms, and they passionately kiss.
* When a rival sauce maker steals Gloria's recipe and beats her to the patent office, Phil saves the day with his knowledge of real estate, finding several illegal modifications to the woman's house just by looking in the front door and blackmailing her into pulling the ripoff sauce.