Created By: Earnest on June 28, 2009
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Glass Unicorn/Porcelain Kitsch

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Up for Grabs. Staple of grandmotherly old women in fiction (with doubtless a basis in real life).

They will have a stand, sometimes an entire Trophy Room dedicated to delicate little figurines. When someone wants to persuade her to do something, they just need to threaten the porcelain puppy. If they want to sweet talk her, they'll compliment the miniature moose. If children are about, many will be broken, and thing's will get much worse.

Some will keep them just for fun, but others will become obsessive collectors either due to emotional/mental instability (they make her happy since she's all alone). Expect their myriad glossy, dead eyes to peer into your soul and scare away most visitors.

Community Feedback Replies: 12
  • June 28, 2009
    Master Hand
    Variation: In Homestuck, John's dad is obsessed with clownsharlequins and the house is covered with harlequin pictures and, yes, figurines. He was given a restraining order by the cast of Cirque de Soilel. Rose's mum, on the other hand, is obsessed with wizards. In Problem Sleuth, Nervous Broad has a collection of "fancy Santas".

    I think I'm getting too much into MS Paint Adventures.
  • June 28, 2009
    Unknown Troper
    Is "compliment the miniature moose" a euphemism for something?
  • June 28, 2009
    Amazingly Enough
    In Tennessee Williams' play The Glass Menagerie, Laura, a young, introverted woman who is shy due to a physical disfigurement, is obsessed with her collection of glass animals.
  • June 28, 2009
    Earnest
    @UT: Do you want it to? We could always make something up and start a new pop culture craze that pointlessly confuses people.
  • June 28, 2009
    blackcat
    • In Charlotte Mc Leod's novel Exit The Milkman one of the characters has a huge collection of porcelain.
    • In an episode of The Suite Life Of Zack And Cody it is revealed that Arwin's mother collects owls.
    • My great uncle's ashes are in this huge weird above ground indoor cemetery (what the hell would you call that?). The hallways are lined with glass cases that hold an endless collection of Hummel figurines and other collectables that are in memory of a whole bunch of dead people. In one room there is a complete and gigantic recreation of the painting The Signing Of The Declaration of Independence also in memory of the dearly departed. I completely forgot about that until this minute.
  • June 28, 2009
    Master Hand
    Are you talking about a mausoleum, by any chance?
  • June 28, 2009
    foxley
    Annie Wilkes from Misery has a collection like this. (In the novel at least. I'm not sure about the movie.)
  • June 28, 2009
    CastingCrowns
    On King Of The Hill, Hank's mom Tilly and her elderly friends are obsessed with getting to see a glass miniatures museum. It turns out Tilly is obsessed with them because they were the only thing that made her feel better during her divorce from Hank's father.
  • June 28, 2009
    SweetMadness
    Sylar's adoptive mother in Heroes collected snowglobes, and she definitely was more than a little cuckoo.
  • June 28, 2009
    blackcat
    @Master Hand: Yes, that's it. I couldn't think of the word.
  • June 29, 2009
    random surfer
    In As The Southern Belle Tolls (a parody of The Glass Menagerie) The Laura collects glass swizzle sticks.
  • June 29, 2009
    Unknown Troper
    In the film "About Schmidt" Warren Shmidt's wife Helen collects little Hummel figurines to the displeasure of Warren. Later in the film Warren visits a museum full of them and has to admit they aren't all so bad. Warren and Helen are both in their late sixties, and Helen is depicted as grandmotherly though technically not a grandmother.
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