Burly Detective Syndrome YKTTW Discussion
|Burly Detective Syndrome|
Referring to a named character by their description, not nameBetter Name Needs Examples Needs Examples Up For Grabs
[Stratadrake thinks this has been collecting dust long enough; Up for Grabs. May still need a better title though.]
Glancing upward, the alluring complexion noted the stalwart giant as he rapidly approached. A faint glimmer sparked from the pair of deep blue ovals of the amorous female as she motioned toward Grignr, enticing him to join her. The barbarian seated himself upon a stool at the wenches side...A form of Purple Prose where a writer replaces a characterís name not with a pronoun but a descriptor, usually in the form "the [adjective] [noun]," such as "the burly detective" (as the Turkey City Lexicon calls it, in a nod to the Mike Shayne series). It's often done by an author to avoid a sense of redundancy when having to refer to the same character repeatedly; an occasional change of address can break up a potentially endless stream of "Bob said"s ("Bob did", "Bob was", etc.) and provide some variety. However, it must be used sparingly -- an author who never refers to the character the same way twice is doing the audience no favors. Addressing a character in too many different ways at once distracts from the flow of reading, and at worst, the audience might think these labels refer to different characters rather than the same one. The naming equivalent of Said Bookism. Also known (in the MLP:FiM fandom) as "Lavender Unicorn Syndrome", after the series's protagonist lavender unicorn Twilight Sparkle.
Examples:Since this is considered Bad Writing, please avoid using it to complain about fanfics you donít like or their authors. Literature
- The fantasy novella ''The Eye of Argon'' is full of this, as seen in the page quote.
- Writers of the ''Mike Shayne'' series tend to refer to the eponymous detective as "the burly detective" and "the red-headed sleuth," inspiring Turkey City Lexicon to coin the term.