Child Marriage Veto YKTTW Discussion

Child Marriage Veto
(permanent link) added: 2010-10-10 12:59:36 sponsor: Xzenu (last reply: 2010-10-23 16:42:27)

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A daughter (or son) gets married off by her father, but refuses. Her refusal is eventually accepted, with or without a lot of conflict & drama, so that she is free to remain single or marry her true love.

The child may be adult or underage, the trope covers the entire spectrum from the nicest forms of Arranged Marriage to Old Man Marrying a Child.

For works where the child wishes she had refused the marriage, see Rape Is Okay If You Are Married.


Anime and Manga

  • In Fiddler on the Roof, the main protagonist is Tevye, the struggling patriarch of a poor family. Managing to marry his oldest daughter off to the wealthy old man Lazar makes him very happy at first. Sure, he doesn't even like the guy - but Lazar has money and social position that will guarantee that his new wife will never have to starve. When the girl finds out about her upcoming marriage - and this is after the deal has been made and the men in the village has celebrated it - she takes it very badly. Tevye takes pity on her, sparing her from the marriage. But in this society, letting the wife-to-be have a say in the matter is so shameful that he have to make up a cover story to fool people that it was his own idea to change his mind.
    • She later marries the man she loves. Lazar attends the wedding, and makes two things clear. First that he doesn't resent her for rejecting him, second that he will never forgive her father for letting her reject him. Tevye had promised his daughter to Lazar, and breaking this agreement by letting his daughter have a say in the matter makes Tevye a man without honor as far as Lazar is concerned.
  • In Space Balls, King Roland never has to back off from his demand that his daughter shall marry a prince. Sure the horribly boring Prince Valium was the only prince left in the galaxy, but it turns out that the hero is actually also a prince. Problem solved.

Live-Action TV
  • In the flashbacks of LOST, Sun is very reluctant when her father shove her into a arranged marriage with the son of one of the father's business partners. After a little while she opens up and falls in love in with the guy... but then HE vetos the whole thing. It turns out that he already have a girlfriend, it's jsut that he havn't dared to tell his family about it.
  • The Babylon 5 episode "The War Prayer" had this with a couple of Centauri, each arranged to marry someone else, but wanting to marry each other.

Real Life
  • Many arranged-marriage systems do in fact allow for vetoing, rather than being forced marriages. (Sort of like parent-selected life-long blind dates). As the intro already says, there's a spectrum. (For example, situations where no legal power prevents children from marrying whoever they please, but it's still a cultural no-no, shameful for the parents and/or the children.)
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