A Stock Phrase commonly used when a character complains or brags about something, to which another character disregards their comment by saying something around the lines of "Don't tell me about X. I Wrote the Book on X". There are two distinct contexts in which this gets used:
Character boasting about their expertise on the subject.
Someone else is commending the character for being well renowned on the subject.
Alonzo Hawk: Since none of your pitiful excuses for men have enough muscle to move a feeble little old lady off her property, I'll go and do it myself, like I have to everything that's important around here.
Lawyer: Now, Mr. Hawk...
Alonzo Hawk: Oh, shut up! We'll start on Number 1 - Harassment! And I wrote the book on harrassment - We'll shut up her phone, turn off her water; we'll sic the Health & Building inspectors on her, steal her dog.
Mrs. Tingle: Who do you think you're fooling? You're so scared I can smell it. Your fear is the most predictable thing about you. You've lived your whole life in fear. Terrified of making a mistake; Scared to death you won't get that A, that ticket out. Afraid you'll never escape your mother and her name tag. Or your father who won't return your calls. Thats why you shunned Luke and every other boy who has ever tried to put his hands on you. You're afraid of getting that bad seed. Afraid of giving birth to a child you never wanted. A child you could only blame for your own wretched existance. Stuck in a small town with a small name. Destined to become that very thing you despise the most. I know all about it, Leigh Ann. I wrote the book! I know you.
Sam Leary: So how come you never gave up on Frank Castle, like everybody else did?
Jake: Because I know what it's like to be given up on.
Sam Leary: Who gave up on YOU?
Jake: Everyone and myself. You know how most cops like to go out for a drink after work? Well, I kept moving on up... to the drink BEFORE work, the drink DURING work, and finally the drink INSTEAD OF work. It got to be a real problem; nobody wanted to deal with it, least of all me. Before I knew it, I was down to cleaning empty shells off the firing range. Then along came Frank Castle, ex-Marine commando with a shiny new police badge, and a request to learn from the man who wrote the book on busting bad guys: me. He helped me get my act together, and the rest is history.
Lilly Dillon: You're working some angle, and don't tell me you're not because I wrote the book!
[[folder: Literature ]]
Literal for Mr Slant, the zombie-lawyer in Discworld.
Inverted in the second Harry Potter book, when Hagrid complains that Lockhart (who did write the book on dealing with magical pests[[hottip:*:Although not the book on magical creatures, that was Newt Scamander.]]) insisted on giving him advice despite the fact it wasn't anything he didn't know.
Guinan: Oh... Then let me just say that... our relationship is beyond friendship, beyond family. And I will let him go. And you must do the same. There can only be one Captain.
Captain William T. Riker: It's not that simple. This was his crew. He wrote the book on this ship.
Guinan: If the Borg know everything he knows, it's time to throw that book away. You must let him go, Riker. It's the only way to beat him. The only way to save him.
From the episode "There Might Be Blood" of Gossip Girl:
Blair Waldorf: Please, I wrote the book on distracted self-centered mothers. My mom has never met a single one of my teachers, she regularly forgets my birthday, and she only comments on my appearance when she has something to criticize.
Monica: Look, Larry, honey, I wrote the book on Section Five, and I know that you don't have to wear your hat unless you're in the kitchen.
Larry: And where is your hat?
Monica: It's in the kitchen. I'll go get it.
Larry: And there's the two points.
Phoebe: Hey, you should really read that book you wrote.
In the episode "The Reunion Job" of Leverage, Larry Duberman (or Doucherman as people called him in high school) wrote the book on Database Security... I mean he literally wrote the book on Database Security.
The Community episode Competitive Wine Tasting has a professor who wrote a book on Who's The Boss. He then proceeds to try to shoehorn his opinion on Abed, but it turns out Abed knew more then he did.
In the Series Finale of Star Trek: Voyager, a future Starfleet instructor introduces Admiral Janeway as "the person who, literally, wrote the book on the Borg."
Storekeeper: This fella never went to school. He grew up in the hills, but he wrote the book on homemade bait. 'Course it's just a bunch of scribbles 'cause he never went to school.
From the episode "The Simpsons Spin-Off Showcase" of The Simpsons:
Moe: Hey, I don't need no advice from a pinball machine. I'll have you know, I wrote the book on love.
Grampa: Yeah - "All Quiet on the Western Front".
Spoofed on Futurama, "How Hermes Requisitioned His Groove Back"
Number 1.0: Don't quote me regulations! I co-chaired the committee that reviewed the recommendation to change the color of the book that regulation's in. We kept it gray.
Five hats means that five tropers think it is ready to publish.
You are saying that you think this draft is ready to be published. That means the description is not ambiguous,
it doesn't duplicate an existing trope, there are at least three examples, and the title makes sense.
Is that what you meant to do?
You are saying this draft has a ready-to-publish hat it does not deserve and you are taking it back.