Line #21 Recap/MysteryScienceTheater3000S05E03SwampDiamonds


1	[[quoteright:359:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/0503s.jpg]]
2	[[caption-width-right:359:"I need to know what ''not'' to do on a date."]]
3
4	[[quoteright:359:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/mst3k_swamp_diamonds.jpg]]
5	[[caption-width-right:359:"Ooo, Swamp Diamond..."]]
6
7	Films watched: ''What to Do on a Date'' (short) and ''Film/SwampDiamonds''
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9	Joel and the 'Bots were less than impressed with Connors' pseudonym "Touch", which was his nickname when he played NCAA basketball.
10
11	''What to Do on a Date'' is a [[TheFifties 1950s]] educational short which stars the awkward Nick, who wants to go on a date with popular girl Kay, but can't think of an activity for them to do. The short gives him (and by extension, the teens of the time watching) a list of activities he could invite Kay to, including swim meets, weenie roasts, bike trips, and "scavenger sales."
12
13	The episode is available in the Gizmoplex [[https://www.gizmoplex.com/mst3k/season:5/videos/mst3k-098-swampdiamonds here]].
14	!!The Segments:
15
16	[[AC:Prologue]]
17	* Instead of helping Joel crunch numbers, Tom and Crow re-enact the ''Series/{{Star Trek\|TheOriginalSeries}}'' episode [[Recap/StarTrekS1E24ThisSideOfParadise “This Side of Paradise”]].
18
19	[[AC:Segment 1/Invention Exchange]]
20	* Dr. Forrester and Frank demonstrate the U-View, a TV that displays a picture-in-picture scenario of what you could be doing at any moment... if you weren’t watching TV. Joel and the Bots present the [[Creator/AndrewLloydWebber Andrew Lloyd Weber]] Grill, which they use to burn the scores of his musicals, and even some that he didn’t write or compose.
21
22	[[AC:Segment 2]]
23	* Inspired by the short, Tom desires to ask Gypsy out on a date. Joel and Crow ponder whether or not he's making the right move.
24
25	[[AC:Segment 3]]
26	* Tom calls Gypsy to ask her out. Despite having his nerves get the best of him and resorting to saying “please” over and over, Gypsy begrudgingly agrees to go out with him.
27
28	[[AC:Segment 4]]
29	* Joel and Crow arrange a scavenger sale for Tom and Gypsy’s date. Joel makes a ''lot'' of sandwiches and Crow makes a move on Gypsy while Tom’s distracted.
30
31	[[AC:Segment 5]]
32	* Tom is confident that the date went well, but a call to Gypsy has her say that she just wants to stay friends. Tom’s broken heart is worsened when Joel reads a letter from a couple who are getting married. In Deep 13, Frank also wallows in heartache when the U-View shows him turning down a romantic encounter with Creator/MichellePfeiffer because of his love of ''Series/{{Baywatch}}''.
33
34	!!The ''[=MST3K=]'' treatment of ''What to Do on a Date'' provides examples of...
35	* BigNo: When the main character, Nick, looks at a list of events he could take Kay to for their date:
36	-->'''Narrator:''' "Would Kay enjoy a bike trip?" [''switch to a close-up of the list''] "Or a weenie roast?"\
37	'''Joel, Crow, and Servo:''' "Nick, '''''NO!'''''"
38	----
39
40	!!The ''[=MST3K=]'' treatment of ''Swamp Diamonds'' provides examples of...
41	* CallBack: To the "to live like the hu-man" speech from ''[[Recap/MysteryScienceTheater3000S01E07RobotMonster Robot Monster]]'', when riffing [[Creator/RogerCorman the Cor-Man's]] name.
42	* CatFight: While the female fight scenes were almost certainly made with this in mind, Crow and Servo definitely play along with it in their commentary.
43	-->'''Crow:''' You usually see this kind of stuff on pay-per-view!
44	* DidntThinkThisThrough: Billie, upon finding the diamonds, tosses them up in the air and coos, "It's raining diamonds!" Half of them fall into the swamp, but none of the characters seem to care. Tom Servo mutters, "''Not'' a good idea."
45	* ExpoSpeakGag: During Servo and Gypsy's date at the scavenger sale Joel and Crow set up:
46	-->'''Tom:''' [[YeOldeButcheredEnglish Huzzah, fair maiden! Your prince have procured an elixir fit for only the fairest of the fair!]]\
47	'''Gypsy:''' [[FlatWhat What...?]]\
48	'''Tom:''' Uh... Joel brought us a couple of Cokes.
49	* ForcedPerspective: With the TV dominating the foreground between them, there's a quick joke where Frank and Forrester each reach out impossibly long arms to pass the remote to each other.
50	* TheLongList: All the names "Touch" Connors might have taken:
51	-->Thrust, Jab, Fudge, Crunch, Blast, Smidge, Shout, Batch, Scrod, Flake, Wink, Sploot, Pinch, Probe, Wing, Snake, Jab [again?], Grunt, Flink, Branch, Snake [again!] Pitch, Pat, Hal, Snake [yet AGAIN!], Snack, Slap
52	** In the Rough Cut, the crew adds more, sometimes saltier, names for him.
53	--->Fritz, Poop, Splayed, [[YiddishAsASecondLanguage Tucchus, Putz]], Klutz
54	* RunningGag:
55	** Referencing Phil Harris, Curt Gowdy, ''The Gun in Betty Lou's Handbag'', etc.
56	** Servo's narration during the many, ''many'' tracking shots of the swamp from the boat: "As we left the clam flowage that day..."
57	* SophisticatedAsHell: Invoked by Servo at Vera's EvenEvilHasStandards moment:
58	-->'''Vera:''' Nice kid! Sell her man right down the river!\
59	'''Servo:''' ''(in bad {{Joisey}} accent)'' Yeah, some women have no class!
60	* SpotTheImpostor: When the girls are saying what they plan for the future, Servo has Lee say, "Well, I hope to make Detective... oops!"
61	* TakeThat: The [[Creator/AndrewLloydWebber Andrew Lloyd Weber]] [sic] Grill, useful for burning Mr. Webber's [[Theatre/{{Cats}} vari]][[Theatre/StarlightExpress ous]] [[Theatre/{{Evita}} scores]]... and [[Theatre/{{Chess}} one]] co-written by Creator/TimRice and "those guys from Music/{{ABBA}}."
62	* TakeThatAudience: In-universe, The U-View provides the user a glimpse at all the fantastic and wonderful things they could be doing right now... [[ForWantOfANail if they weren't sitting at home watching themselves on television, that is]]. Both Frank and Dr. F quickly become depressed at seeing their ideal lives (though Frank gets distracted again), and Clay bitterly decides to watch more TV just to forget it.
63	* ThisIsGonnaSuck: When Joel sees Roger Corman's name in the credits he groans, "Oh, this is gonna go down hard, guys."
64	* WholePlotReference: The host segments follow a plot about Servo asking Gypsy out on a date, in a parody of the episode's short. It also serves to {{deconstruct\|ion}} the short's [[UsefulNotes/DwightDEisenhower Eisenhowerrific]] ValuesDissonance.
65	----
66	->[[TheStinger "Sssshhhut up!"]]

Context Recap / MysteryScienceTheater3000S05E03SwampDiamonds