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Context Quotes / Vexxarr

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1->'''Vexxarr:''' Hey! The biting sarcasm is ''my'' bit. Wound my pride with your own material, bucko.
2
3->'''Vexxarr:''' You will ''not'' drive me mad! Do you hear me? I refuse to be a resident of your tiny circle of madness! I refuse!
4
5->'''Vexxarr:''' Well, thank you ''so much'' for turning my vague, formless paranoia into a concrete and palpable ''psychosis!''
6
7->'''Vexxarr:''' I finally get to the punch line, and turns out it's ''me.''
8
9->'''Vexxarr:''' And you would, wouldn't you? You'd just keep heaping on the abuse until there was nothing left [of me] but a slimy mark on your lab counter.\
10'''General:''' Vexxarr, that's untrue and you know it.\
11'''Vexxarr:''' It...it is?\
12'''General:''' Absolutely. Our budget won't allow that level of thoroughness. Best we could manage would be a small green lump.
13
14->'''Sploorfix:''' I don't know how I can ever thank you...\
15'''Minionbot:''' No need... mischief is its own reward...
16
17->'''Minionbot:''' Do you ever tire of being wrong?\
18'''Vexxarr:''' No. It has a unique charm each and every time...
19
20->'''Vexxarr:''' Okay, who are you, and which unjust god must I appease to make you leave?
21
22->'''Vexxarr:''' Ah, Sploorfix! I was hoping you could settle an argument for us. Minionbot thinks it is more painful to be boiled alive than to be flushed into open space...\
23'''Spoorflix:''' It's not my fault! I had to let them in!
24->'''Vexxarr:''' I understand completely. Okay, off to the airlock.
25
26->'''Vexxarr:''' Well... there's nothing I can think of that might add to the inherent level of comedy orbiting that statement...
27
28->'''Sploorfix:''' Well, we did save an entire species from gruesome slaughter.\
29'''Vexxarr:''' [[SiliconBasedLife Rocks eating other rocks?!]] That's not slaughter, that's erosion!
30
31->'''The Foss:''' We merely use these crude vessels to interact with subcreatures such as you!\
32'''Vexxarr:''' ''Subcreatures'', eh?\
33'''Foss:''' What is... er... that thing?\
34'''Vexxarr:''' Behold a sand wedge. I use it to interface with irritants such as ''you''.
35
36->'''Vexxarr:''' Nothing for it but to meet my Maker. Let me get my list of complaints...
37
38->'''Vexxarr:''' When you are aboard an alien construct of uncertain design and purpose, you touch ''nothing!'' You have no way of knowing if a lever could vent the atmosphere into space, if...if a switch could activate flesh-eating nanobots. Until you have studied everything, you have to assume that this station's single purpose was to isolate and destroy you personally! Do you understand?!
39
40->'''Sploorfix:''' This way you can work together against a common enemy. It's what Vexxarr would have wanted...\
41'''Minionbot:''' Error! Vexxarr would have held out for a bargain unethically weighted in his favor.\
42'''Sploorfix:''' Fine. It's what he would have wanted if he weren't ''evil''.\
43'''Minionbot:''' Well, so long as fairies are dancing on pins...
44
45->'''Vexxarr:''' My hate for you is so large that freighters give it right-of-way at commercial spaceports.
46
47->'''Vexxarr:''' It's like the universe says "SEE THAT HOPE OVER THERE? THAT'S FOR SOMEONE I ACTUALLY LIKE. DON'T TOUCH IT. IN FACT, LET'S PUT YOU OVER HERE WHERE YOU CAN'T EVEN SEE IT." And then it says "WOULD YOU LIKE SOME FIRE OR CARNIVOROUS ROBOTS TO GO WITH YOUR SPIRALING ABYSS?"
48
49->'''Minionbot:'''I have finally reached the point in time where the questionable logic of my methods becomes too great to ignore.
50
51->'''Vexxarr:''' And when, exactly, were you planning to tell me?\
52'''Minionbot:''' The very second after not telling you ceased to be funny.
53
54->'''Vexxarr:''' Well, life is just nature's way of teaching you to embrace disappointment.\
55'''Engineerbot:''' Then... what does that make ''death?''\
56'''Vexxarr:''' Vindication of methodology.
57
58->'''Tact-o-tron:''' Look... we've learned a ''lot'' from our failures. Nothing else can go wrong.\
59'''Vexxar:''': That's ''insane''! Something else can ''always'' go wrong!\
60'''Tact-o-tron:''' Incorrect. ''All'' error has been corrected.\
61'''Vexxarr:''' Then explain ''this''!\
62'''Sid:''' Hello... I am a sandwich.\
63'''Tact-o-tron:''' What does that prove?\
64'''Vexxarr:''' That failure arrives in infinite variation.
65
66->'''Vexxarr:''' With great power comes the joy of misuse and reckless overapplication.

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