Line #12 Quotes/Mythbusters


1	!''Testing in three! two! one!''
2
3	!!'''Adam Savage'''
4
5	->''[[IRejectYourReality I reject your reality and substitute my own!]]''
6
7	->''Am I... missing... an eyebrow?'' (Yep.)
8
9	->picks up small fragment of cement truck ''Well, ''there's'' your problem!''
10
11	->''Failure is'' '''''always''''' ''an option on Mythbusters.''
12
13	->''Gravity, man... it's not just a good idea, '''it's the law!'''''
14
15	->''If I had any dignity, that would have been humiliating!''
16
17	->''So I think [[ConfusingMultipleNegatives my faulty wiring of the faulty wiring is no longer faulty, so that it's correctly faulty]]...''
18
19	->(in his Film/JamesBond villain voice) ''Is everybody ready for '''diving?'''''
20
21	->[To Jamie:]''The only thing that differentiates you and me from [[WesternAnimation/BeavisAndButthead a couple of 14 year old pyromaniacs]]...'' (knocks on blast shield) ''...is ballistic glass.''
22
23	->[To Camera]''Why? Because secretly, you've always wondered. And that's why we're here.''
24
25	->''[[PunctuatedForEmphasis I Love...Consistent...DATA! HAHAHAHA!'']]
26
27	->Points to a .30-06 round ''This kills you.'' Points to a [[{{BFG}} .50BMG round]] ''This kills you and everyone else in the room!''
28
29	->''Today's forecast: (pops an umbrella open) Seventy percent chance...of science!''
30
31	->(after being slapped by Jamie) ''Holy bleeping bleepity bleep!''
32
33	->(After their lead balloon goes... up like a lead balloon.)\
34	''I tell you, that might be ridiculously impractical, but, you know, if someone says it's impossible, '''we just take it as a challenge! Busted idiom!'''''
35
36	->(in a terrible French accent) ''Today on Mythbusters, we have my two favorite things: red meat and high explosives!''
37
38	->(Thermite-coated cloth suddenly burns fast and brightly) ''Dude-[[Literature/TheBible eronomy]]!''
39
40	->(First water-walking test; to Jamie) ''Come, Silent Walrus! Let us storm the castle! [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking I will put on my safety gear]].''
41
42	->''We often learn at the end of an episode of [=MythBusters=], everyday objects can, in fact, be made lethal [[SpaceWhaleAesop if Jamie builds a gun to shoot them]].''
43
44	->''Get me the Jack Russel Terrier urine. '''[[SarcasmMode That]]''' [[SarcasmMode oughta do it.]]''
45
46	-> ''(As their model Hindenburg accidentally catches on fire) Man, these things are ALWAYS catching on fire! ...That is the textbook definition of "irony," kids.''
47
48	-> (Holding up two bottles of explosive ingredients with {{Pixellation}} over their names) This ingredient is made of Blur. Ha. And this has some Blur too. Blur is very dangerous; you don't want to mix Blur with Blur.
49
50	-> (On taking candy from a baby) These babies are crafty. I think we can outsmart them.
51
52	-> (As their arrow machine gun breaks down for the umpteenth time.)\
53	''Arg! Bleck! [[{{Angrish}} Wackem treggy wackum boogum barsher...]] BLEH! [[CallBack Fudge! Babies! ...Baby hippos!]]''
54
55	-> (After they ''finally'' complete a successful test of said arrow machine gun.)\
56	''I'm gonna go eat something that was living!''
57
58	-> ''This is the point in the day, which we've come to many times, where we start to go "[[StuffBlowingUp What else do we have that's flammable in the truck?]]"''
59
60	-> ''I just had another one of those "[[CatchPhrase what the hell are we doing?!]]" moments'' (numerous occasions)
61
62	-> (While Jamie is painting something) ''[[BulletproofFashionPlate White shirt. Black paint.]] That is what being fearless is all about.''
63
64	-> (After shooting a car-mounted paintball machine gun) ''You SO wish you were me right now.''
65
66	-> (After a car going over a cliff fails to explode) ''[[RealityIsUnrealistic Reality makes a crappy special effects crew.]]''
67
68	->''[[AppliedMathematics Science + Beer = Good]]''
69
70	-> (After confirming the Drain Disaster myth, standing behind a manhole cover with a "2" on it) ''Well, if there's one thing everyone knows they can expect from a [[ToiletHumor sewer explosion]], it's that [[{{Pun}} number two is gonna fly into the air.]]''
71
72	->''Remember, kids, in order to perform science, you need [[FunWithHomophones patience... patients]] willing to be subjected to dangerous experiments.''
73
74	->''Remember, kids, the only difference between screwing around and science is writing it down.''
75
76	-> (Wearing a auto racing fire suit and carrying a climbing axe) ''Here comes chaos!''
77
78	-> (As Jamie is polishing a homemade wrecking ball in the background) ''Jamie [[UnusualEuphemism wire-brushes his balls]] every morning.''
79
80	->(Jamie's attempt to recreate AirVentPassageway is... [[WithCatlikeTread not going well]].)\
81	'''Adam''': Why, Thor, the god of thunder, is trying to enter my building!\
82	'''Tory''': Somebody needs to check that air conditioner!
83
84	->(Wearing a [[TinfoilHat tin foil mask/helmet]] as Jamie {{MacGyver\|ing}}s a [[RayGun heat ray]] out of a microwave) ''I wouldn't say Jamie's an EvilGenius. I'm not sure he's evil and I'm not sure he's a genius...''
85
86	-> (After inhaling a mixture of tobacco snuff and powdered [[BrandX drink mix]] to induce a trackable sneeze:) ''Ohhh... it's irritating, '''and''' sweet and fruity!''
87
88	-> (After blowing up a trombone caused the police to stop by and see what was going on) ''I think any day when we do something that brings the cops flocking to us, but then they have to let us continue what we're doing, is the'' perfect ''Mythbusters day.''
89
90	-> (After receiving Buster's ballistics gel replacement in 22,000-foot Fall)\
91	'''Adam''': ... And, his name is Ted as in bus''ted''.\
92	'''Narrator''': Or, as in exploi''ted'', detona''ted'', and annihila''ted''
93
94	!!'''Jamie Hyneman'''
95
96	->''Our DeathRay doesn't seem to be working. I'm standing right in it... [[EpicFail and I'm not dead yet.]]''
97
98	->''It always brightens my mood when we get to break out the sledgehammer.''
99
100	->''[[ItMakesSenseInContext Quack, damn you]].''
101
102	->''Jamie wants [[StuffBlowingUp big boom!]]''
103
104	->''When in doubt, [[StuffBlowingUp C-4]].''
105
106	->''Judging by the bucket, I'd say we've only got [[ShapedLikeItself a drop in the bucket.]]''
107
108	->''It was the lard that did it.''
109
110	-> ([object] has just been blasted to smithereens]) ''[Object] went away.''
111
112	->''What's the matter? Haven't you ever seen somebody work on a car with an axe?''
113
114	-> [Referring to a myth only available as a bonus on the website]: ''It involves [[NoodleImplements a portable music player, Grant, and an onion.]]''
115
116	-> [standing in front of a washing machine filled with ball bearings rattling '''very''' noisily, shouting at the top of his lungs] ''So far my neighbors think it's cool to be next to the Mythbusters.'' [points at the dryer] ''That could change.''
117
118	-> ''Steak in a dryer with ball bearings actually did really tenderize the meat. Of course, there were problems because it, like, tenderized the dryer itself and it fell apart but, you know, if you get over that you've got a tender steak.''
119
120	-> ''Don't open your mouth [in that pond]. It's like an au jus of duck poop.''
121
122	-> ''It's just another lovely day at the bomb range. The birds are singing, rabbits are hopping about, and soon there's gonna be a big explosion.''[[note]]the matchhead cannon[[/note]]
123
124	-> (In reference to the soda-can firing rig balanced on his shoulder) ''[[ICallItVera I call it my little]] [[{{Pun}} pop gun.]]''
125
126	-> ''Sometimes... You just need a little extra lubrication.''
127
128	-> [After using two tanks to pull apart a couple of interlaced phone books] ''I just wanted to make a phone call.''
129
130	->''It's like your ass is one with the target.''
131
132	->'''Adam:''' ''Gimme a countdown.''\
133	'''Jamie:''' ''2, 3, 1. fires chicken cannon''
134
135	->''Unfortunately, humans are big heavy things, usually, and so when you're using them as projectiles, it takes a lot of energy, and it takes a heck of a lot of work.''
136
137	->'''Jamie:''' ''[While Adam is digging a hole in the background]'' Adam doesn't know it yet, but he's digging his own grave.
138	->'''Adam:''' What was that?
139	->'''Jamie:''' Nothing! Keep digging!
140
141	->'''Jamie:''' (About to detonate an explosive) ''Buh-bye!''
142
143	->(Blueprint for "10 Pounds of Poop in a 5-Pound Bag".)\
144	'''Jamie:''' Well, I've always heard it said, "ten pounds of BEEP in a five-pound bag".\
145	'''Adam:''' So have I, but because it's a family show, we can't say BEEP.\
146	'''Jamie:''' Well, can we say crap?\
147	'''Adam:''' Apparently we ''can'' say crap, but only twice in an episode, and we just did.\
148	'''Jamie:''' Awww, [[SoundEffectBleep crap]].
149
150	->''I always enjoy seeing Adam in pain.''
151
152	!!'''Kari Byron'''
153
154	->''These will explode, these will melt, this will kill you -- [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking this is great]].''
155
156	->''As I ''am'' six months pregnant, I will be wearing a bulletproof vest. Protecting for two, you see.''
157
158	->''Our blast zone is set up way, way, way over there. But we've decided to come really, really far back to make sure all Mythbusters, big and tiny [=[points to very pregnant abdomen)]=], are perfectly safe.''
159
160	->''[[ItMakesSenseInContext Do we want to talk about why I just got hit in the head with a thumb?]]''
161
162	->''If we're wrong about this, we're going to have a'' '''''really''''' ''bad day.''
163
164	->''High-explosives and electricity. Wooo!''
165
166	->''I think the idea of talking to your plants is some foolish, hippie, crystal-gripping nonsense...''
167
168	->(Carried Away. The Build Team is having difficulty coming up with an estimate on how long it will take to inflate all the needed balloons.)\
169	'''Narrator:''' Eventually, they call the rocket scientist, and she came up with just under four hours.\
170	'''Scottie:''' God, I used to be a ''teacher''! The kids are gonna be like, "Oh my god, she can't even do ''math'' any more!"\
171	'''Kari:''' (to camera in a hilarious Southern drawl) I ain't never been one for book learnin'!
172
173	->'''Kari:''' What does it mean when [crocodiles] hiss?
174	->'''[[FluffyTamer David Kledzik]]:''' When they hiss, they feel a little threatened, cause you're getting a little bit too close to them, cause they're kind of unhappy with your presence right now.
175	->'''Kari:''' (''Kari's eyes get very large'') They're ''unhappy?''
176
177	->''Science gets more fun [[RhymesOnADime when I get a bigger gun!]]''
178
179	->(Screaming at the top of her lungs at a straw brush held against a rotating clay pot) '''''YOU CRAZY KILLER!'''''
180
181	->(While Tory is trying to separate a bullet from its shell... with his teeth) ''Your mom is in my head right now, and she's telling you: '''[[TooDumbToLive Don't do that.]]'''''
182
183	->'''Kari:''' Now, go on--go back to whatever you're doing--I have an incredibly busy afternoon of stuffing dead birds into sexy lingerie ahead of me.\
184	'''The Narrator:''' [[ARareSentence Now there's a sentence you don't hear very often...]]
185
186	->(After a small scale test of Fireworks Man goes wrong) ''I also learned something about myself. And that is that when in danger, I will use a co-worker as a human shield.''
187
188	->''Now remember: The safety word is "Run!"''
189
190	->'''Grant:''' OK, but instead of a bathtub, we should do a TOILET! You know, like how you used to throw cherry bombs down the toilet in high school.\
191	'''Tory:''' Yeah, well, I wouldn't know anything about that; I was too busy studying chemistry.\
192	({{beat}})\
193	'''Kari:''' [[OutOfCharacterMoment ...What is this? Opposite land?]]
194
195	->''It's really strange when you have a job where you spend all day doing things your parents told you never to do.''
196
197	->(After Adam gets a severe electric shock) ''Did you feel God?''
198
199	->''Now what would be a really good pump-action shotgun to go with my outfit?''
200
201	->[sniffing cigarette-smoke saturated shirt] ''I smell like... Bingo Night in some... French foreign cinema kind of... old lady bar.''
202
203	->''Remember the Hwacha? Well, we're going to Hwacha them. So watch-a this!''
204
205	->[VERY distressed] ''What I want to know... is why I... am a grown woman... and boys are still trying to make me eat bugs!''
206
207	->[after busting the myth that girls don't pass gas] ''Can I take the microphone out of my butt now?''
208
209	->''I promised my mother I wouldn't do the dangerous stuff anymore... sorry, mom.''
210
211	->''Okay, my toast? My toast ''always'' lands buttah side up.''
212
213	->(to Tory) ''Are we ever going to have an episode where you don't hurt yourself?''
214
215	->(Blueprint Room setup for Antigravity)\
216	'''Grant:''' Have you ever thought it would be cool to control gravity?\
217	'''Kari:''' (putting a "Pyramid Power" model on her head) Wooo, great, another one of ''these''!\
218	'''Grant:''' OK, look, there's a lot of credible research going on all around the world. There's a Russian scientist doing a lot of cool things with superconductors, NASA, the European space agency... are all interested.\
219	'''Kari:''' Yeah, that just pretty much proves that there's nutjobs and fruitcakes all the way to the top.
220
221	-> ''Sometimes you get to blow stuff up. Sometimes you drive in circles with the air conditioning off.''
222
223	->(While climbing down a building on a rope made of human hair.)\
224	'''Kari:''' I see split ends.\
225	'''Tory:''' You should have used conditioner!\
226	'''Kari:''' They're ''split ends''!
227
228	->(Prep work for Cannonball Chemistry. Kari takes off her safety gear and speaks to camera with '''very''' mussed hair and dust-covered clothes.)\
229	''Yeah, I really like working in TV... I think it's the glamour, the clothes... ({{beat}}) Makes me feel really pretty.''
230
231	!!'''Tory Belleci'''
232
233	->''You know, watching Kari dig this hole and knowing that I'm going to be buried up to my neck in it, it's kind of like watching her dig my grave... I hope I don't regret saying that.''
234
235	-> ''OK, all set to go here. Glasses are set up, car's ready, paramedics are.....nowhere to be found.''
236
237	-> ''I see injuries in my future.''
238
239	-> '''Tory:''' Frank, why are you standing so far away?
240	-> '''[[DeadpanSnarker Frank Doyle:]]''' Because I want to continue to live.
241	-> '''Tory:''' So the next question is, why am I standing so close?
242
243	-> '''Tory:''' Let's play charades! \
244	(Grant begins to act out charades, but breaks down laughing) \
245	'''Tory:''' Two words. Sounds like? \
246	'''Fire extinguisher in a fire:''' BOOM!
247
248	-> ''Cool, [[ItMakesJustAsMuchSenseInContext we get to torture yogurt]]!''
249
250	-> (standing in a bull ring, wearing a red jumpsuit) ''I'm starting to think this is a bad idea.''
251
252	-> ''You know you're onto something when your ''small-scale'' involves dropping cars from a crane!''
253
254	-> ''It's getting dangerous here on [=MythBusters=]. And that's how we like it.''
255
256	-> (About Creator/BenjaminFranklin) And we killed a dead president! \
257	'''Grant:''' [[Funny/MythBusters He was never president...]] \
258	''[Grant and Kari walk away, not quite holding in their laughter.]'' \
259	'''Tory:''' Wasn't he? ...Dammit.
260
261	-> ''Apparently, I am close to the size of the ballistics dummy, therefore I have to go and shop... [[WholesomeCrossdresser for a bra.]] Once again, making my family proud.''
262
263	-> ''Hey, it's working...what the heck?''
264
265	-> ''Black powder and duct tape? That doesn't sound like science, that sounds like a family reunion!''
266
267	-> (after Kari screams "TORY!" at another piece of straw held against a rotating clay pot) ''That was a good one, Kari! Now I know what it would be like to be married to you.''
268
269	-> ''We're popping popcorn with lasers!''
270
271	-> '''Kari:''' Your idea of a safe stop is to '''shank me'''?!\
272	'''Tory:''' [[ComicallyMissingThePoint Well, more]] [[DistinctionWithoutADifference like harpoon you.]]
273
274	-> ''Am I excited? You better believe I'm excited! We just made a giant moose out of rubber, and now we're going to crash cars into it!''
275
276	-> '''Adam:''' [[LargeHam LET'S PILLAGE!]]\
277	'''Tory:''' I don't know if that's legal in California…
278
279	-> ''(During the ''Jaws'' episode, Adam obtained two of the actual yellow barrels used in the film)'' \
280	'''Adam:''' So he ''(the owner)'' says the only things we can't do are burn 'em, blow 'em up, or lose 'em. \
281	'''Tory:''' Has he '''watched the show?'''
282
283	->''Awww, it's a cute little bug...[[DoomyDoomsOfDoom of death!]]''
284
285	->''(Playing on the doomed piano) and we're gonna light it on fire!''
286
287	->''[[IfIHadANickel If I had a nickel]] for every time I've been [[GroinAttack kicked in the nuts]] on this show, I could retire.''
288
289	->''So we're back here at New Mexico Tech. You know, the school where you can get a degree in'' '''[[StuffBlowingUp blowing]] [[SoundEffectBleep BLEEP]] [[StuffBlowingUp up]].'''
290
291	!!'''Grant Imahara'''
292
293	->''This is [[WhyWeCantHaveNiceThings why we can never have anything nice]].''
294
295	->''It's like sewing on a button... [[{{Dissimile}} except this button is tongue-shaped, and made out of meat]].''
296
297	->''You know what they say: Safe exploding is good exploding.''
298
299	->''I love those two words: "Bomb robot".''
300
301	-> (Adam is working on a grappling hook, and is firing it at the wall. He misses repeatedly) ''Now all we have to do is work on the 'hitting the wall' part.''
302
303	->'''Tory:''' Do you even watch any sports? \
304	'''Grant:''' [[ActorAllusion Robot combat]]. ([[{{Beat}} Pause]]) It's a sport!
305
306	-> [To Tory] ''This next myth is really fun! It involves you hurting yourself.''
307
308	-> ''HWACHA!!!''
309
310	->[To Tory] ''You've had '''stupider''' ideas.''
311
312	->''I'm going to [[WhenAllYouHaveIsAHammer make a robot]], [[TheAllSolvingHammer of course]].''
313
314	-> ''Don't forget to do the science!''
315
316	-> ''And now for something completely gratuitous.''
317
318	-> ''If there's a [[CirclesofHell circle of hell]] for people who destroy beautiful cars, that's where we're going.''
319
320	-> ''Leather: It's great for fashion; not so good for artillery.''
321
322	-> (Lampshading WireDilemma while installing an RC rig in a car.)\
323	''Now, which is it... the brown wire, the other brown wire, or the '''other other''' brown wire?''
324
325	-> ''Decapitation hazard, everybody.''
326
327	->("Knock Your Socks Off" revisit. Tory has just proposed testing shaven vs. unshaven legs in the hunt for the best-case scenario socks.)\
328	'''Grant:''' Are you volunteering your bare legs?\
329	'''Tory:''' I don't wax my legs.\
330	'''Kari:''' [[MeaningfulLook Not yet you don't!]]\
331	'''Grant:''' Ooh, hey! (''rings a steel pipe like a bell'') Round 1!
332
333	-> ([[ItMakesSenseInContext While operating a bicycle pump attached to a large array of soda bottle rockets]]) "I'm pumping as fast as I can!"
334
335	!!'''Scottie Chapman'''
336
337	->''Let's egg him on until he hurts himself. That's always fun.'' (seconds later, Tory tries a bicycle jump and faceplants on asphalt)
338
339	->[Presenting a car's driveshaft to Jamie] ''For you: One nice, greasy part. Guaranteed to get [[BulletproofFashionPlate your shirt]] dirty.''
340
341	!!'''The {{Narrator}} (Robert Lee)'''
342
343	->''"Who ''are'' the [=MythBusters=]? Adam [[FunPersonified Savage]] [[OddCouple and]] [[TheComicallySerious Jamie]] [[DeadpanSnarker Hyneman]]...between them, more than thirty years of special effects experience. [[ForScience They don't just tell the myths -- they put them to the test!]]"''
344	-->-- OpeningNarration
345
346	->''Adam has to act like this... It's in his contract.''
347
348	->''...Adam puts out the Mythbuster Yodel.''
349	--> 3 copies of Adam sing "FIRE IN THE HOLE!" in sequence to form a chord.
350	->''Okay, Adam, now you're just really taking the barbershop thing too far. Just press the detonation button, will ya?''
351
352	->''When it comes to ramping it up, there's one location guaranteed to find the dial marked "Awesome," turn it to eleven, rip it off, and run away laughing.''\
353	''The lesson here is obvious: Don't hold loaded guns in exploding rooms.''\
354	''Ah, Jamie's high school days. Practicing football! Growing facial hair! And drinking cardboard.''
355
356	->''Oblivious to all warnings, Grant and Tory set the scene, then get dressed for success: sombreros, boots, and bandoliers - a desperately clichéd battle looms between the tragically uncool, the undeniably hot, and these two idiots.''
357
358	-> (After Grant made a bet that he'd eat his multi-tool pouch if his safety system fails) ''Coming up next, we learn how Grant likes his multi-tool pouch prepared!''
359
360	-> ''Ladies and gentlemen, it's been a blast...not to mention, a pleasure.''
361
362	!!'''Sgt. J.D. Nelson'''
363
364	->'''Grant:''' But we have a backup piano we ''can'' explode. What do you have for us?\
365	'''J.D.:''' What I think you need is the "[=MythBusters=] Concerto in [[StuffBlowingUp C-4]]".
366
367	->(upon seeing a bucket filled with [[MoreDakka one million matchheads]]) ''You guys have '''way''' too much time on your hands.''
368
369	->(shortly after the above) ''If this '''does''' go off'' [while we're here]'', [[BuffySpeak then it is time to de-ass the area with the quickness]].''
370
371	->(while [[ItMakesSenseInContext digging in a one-story house filled with popcorn to bury some high explosives]]) ''I don't think they taught me this in bomb school...''
372
373	->(upon seeing Jamie's metal sphere contraption for painting a room with explosives)\
374	''Congratulations... after all these years, you finally made the [[Franchise/StarWars Death Star]].''
375
376	->(J.D. preps a C-4 explosive, but Jamie is unsatisfied with its appearance and re-shapes it to look like a cartoon bomb.)\
377	''I have no doubt in my mind [[WesternAnimation/WileECoyoteAndTheRoadrunner you're gonna get that road runner this time]].''

Context Quotes / Mythbusters