Line #42 Quotes/GuideDangIt


1	[[AC:Music]]
2	->''Don’t be discouraged, just read ''Magazine/NintendoPower''\
3	Or call the [[UsefulNotes/NineHundredNumber Nintendo Power Line number]]\
4	Or just get the {{strategy guide}}''
5	-->-- '''{{Music/Brentalfloss}}''', "''[[VideoGame/DragonQuest Dragon Warrior]]'' WithLyrics"
6
7	[[AC:Video Games]]
8	->...Space Quest IV'' will give you hours of frustration unless you have this hintbook. Want to know [[SolveTheSoupCans how to get the dog into the hanging basket? Want to find out how to attach the melon?]] Buy this hintbook and it all becomes obvious.''
9	-->-- ''VideoGame/SpaceQuestIVRogerWilcoAndTheTimeRippers'', in-game item description
10
11	[[AC:Web Animation]]
12	->"Think of the game like ''[[VideoGame/DrJekyllAndMrHydeNES Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde]]'' for the Platform/{{NES}} for example. Everybody should play this game if you want to get into game design. It's a perfect example of doing nothing to teach the player about its limits and goals. Nothing in this game seems to make sense. Stuff happens at random, people hurt you, some people don't, you walk backwards as Mr. Hyde, and ''I'' don't know! ...Just play this game for two minutes and you will understand how poorly you can teach a player how to play your stupid game."
13	-->-- '''[[WebVideo/GameGrumps Arin Hanson]]''', ''WebVideo/{{Sequelitis}}'' review of ''VideoGame/MegaManX''
14
15	->"This is one game where there's officially no shame in looking up the FAQ."
16	-->-- '''''WebAnimation/ZeroPunctuation''''' on ''VideoGame/{{Minecraft}}''
17
18	[[AC:Web Original]]
19	->'''Iolo''': Remind me again why we're doing any of this?\
20	'''Steve''': Obviously, [[FetchQuest to get the jawbone so that we can teleport to Monk Isle and get me a spellbook.]]\
21	'''Iolo''': But there's no way you would have ''known'' that Erstam had any such thing, or that it could get you there. You just arbitrarily decided we'd go look for the Mad Mage!
22	-->-- LetsPlay VideoGame/UltimaVIIPartII: "[[http://lparchive.org/Ultima-VII-Part-2-Serpent-Isle/Update%2026/ Moonshade]]"
23
24	->''So, this section is just bundles of fun. There are giant puddles of water all across the area. Some of them will electrocute Snake when he walks in them. Some of them won't! How do you tell which is which? Walk in 'em. If Snake goes flying and loses some health? It's electrified! If he does not? You're good to walk through it. That is...literally the only way to know. If you're lucky, there might be a big machine next to the water for an indicator. But 95% of the time there's no such luck. Not even the clichéd electrical currents arcing on the water or anything video gamey like that.''
25	-->--'''LetsPlay/TheDarkId''', [[http://lparchive.org/Metal-Gear-Ghost-Babel/Update%2027/ Let's Play]] ''VideoGame/MetalGearGhostBabel''
26
27	[[AC:Web Video]]
28	->''"Enter a magical world where the only limits are your imagination--and constant references to the wiki to figure out how everything works."''
29	-->-- '''WebVideo/HonestTrailers''' on ''Minecraft''
30
31	->"A game should hold your hand a little bit to show you what the fuck you're supposed to do. Even ''VideoGame/DarkSouls'' does that!"
32	-->-- '''Noonum''' in [[https://youtu.be/wZjSXwxQbjM his and Tehsnakerer's Let's Play]] of ''VideoGame/HuntDownTheFreeman''
33
34	->"The townspeople don't help that much. They might as well just say, ''[='=][[{{Tagline}} Get the Power! Nintendo Power!]][='=]''"
35	-->-- '''WebVideo/TheAngryVideoGameNerd''' plays ''VideoGame/ZeldaIITheAdventureOfLink''
36
37	->"Presently, this information can ''only'' be obtained by watching my Website/YouTube videos. That's poor game design."
38	-->-- '''[=YandereDev=]''', "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tNaM97tgHUM Let's Examine]] VideoGame/{{Hitman}}"
39
40	->"I tried so many things to stop or survive his tornado thing, and none of them worked. Wanna know why? It's because you're supposed to run all the way to the end and crouch, and Sub Zero automatically grabs onto this ledge. There's nothing there to convey that you have to crouch at the end. No hints, no clues, nothing. That's cheap, and fuck this game for doing it."
41	-->-- '''WebVideo/ProJared''', [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-CwSrRK39Uo review]] of ''VideoGame/MortalKombatMythologiesSubZero''
42
43	->''If you take the normal route and not the secret one, you'll get the insult of your life. You'll see Joi fall into a trap and DIE! You'll see "Voce perdeu", translating to You lost. So after all that shit you went through, it turns out you lost. You can get a good ending, though it's invisible. It's hiding behind an invisible door over some lava. How are you supposed to guess that?!''
44	-->-- '''LetsPlay/{{Levelengine}}''', reflecting on the 2012 version of O Ninja Negro in his [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bvJ2DYQ36Qo list of worst Super Mario World hacks]].
45
46	->"Now I don't know HOW you're supposed to figure this out..."
47	-->-- ''[[LetsPlay/HCBailly HC Bailly]]'', using one of his catch-phrases.
48
49	->"It's where some critical piece of information is obscured or the game neglects to even provide to you in the first place. In this case, it was the jellyfishing contest...you've literally caught every jellyfish in a whole freaking area, but the counter always says 84 and the guy says he wants ''100'', and he's all the way back at the beginning of the level, so you don't want to backtrack all the way there for ''nothing!''"
50	-->-- '''[=LambHoot=]''' on ''VideoGame/SpongeBobSquarePantsRevengeOfTheFlyingDutchman''
51
52	->"They went absolutely loopy-loo, stuck in the loo with these boxes! The same applies to the hidden gems, where I managed to find 36 of them by myself, which I am proud of. But then I couldn't find the one on Shipping Error because that defies all common sense and doesn't give you a single hint about it, and [[ThatOneLevel Run It Bayou]]. Which doesn't only hide a switch crate ''there''[[note]]Behind a nondescript barrel that blends into the scenery[[/note]], of all places, but then expects you to go back and figure out that the new crates that you're supposed to stand on are over ''here''[[note]]so far off-screen that you have to slide/double jump at just the right angle to reach them[[/note]]! '''''How in the screw-shaped bums''''' did anyone figure that out without a guide?!"
53	-->-- '''WebVideo/{{Caddicarus}}''' on ''VideoGame/CrashBandicoot4ItsAboutTime''
54
55	->"However, after years of getting killed by that same Werewolf, I found out you can actually kill it. What the hell? How was I supposed to know that you're actually meant to run into the Observatory, flip the circuit breaker outside, run back in, open the dome, lure it into the dome and crush it to death? How the hell was I supposed to know that? The answer is: I didn't! I had to look it up on [[https://vtmb.fandom.com/wiki/The_Enemy_of_My_Enemy the wiki]]!"
56	-->-- '''WebVideo/SsethTzeentach''' on the infamous Werewolf encounter in ''VideoGame/VampireTheMasqueradeBloodlines''
57
58	->"But unfortunately, [[VideoGame/Persona1 this game's]] a bubbling cesspit of actual evil. I mean, this is a game you can pick up right now and not realize there's a pile of [[OptionalPartyMember missable party member options]]. The most plot-important missable party member requires an extremely specific set of decisions that no one without a guide is getting, and the story [[StoryBranching features two distinct routes]], which again, following the basic game directions, you never know existed at all. It's absurd; incredible for replayability, cool feature, totally absurd. This is the kind of game you play with a guide."
59	-->-- '''[=KBash=]''' on "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vdcNCGArE64 The Most Punishing Persona Games]]"
60
61	->"When you get stuck, you're not sure if it's because you missed an item that you need, [[TalkToEveryone or because you need to talk to everyone in town again in case one yields a new dialogue option]], ''or'' because [[NPCScheduling you simply have to wait for it to get dark before anything can happen]]. I ended up just fruitlessly circling the town, reclicking all the same places I'd been before, talking to the same six people in the same order, and then going to sleep to make it change from day to night. It's like a depression simulator!"
62	-->-- '''WebVideo/JennyNicholson''' on ''Literature/TheVampireDiaries ([[TheProblemWithLicensedGames 1996 Game]])''
63
64	->"In the older [[Franchise/FireEmblem FE]] games, deserts are treasure troves filled with the relics of a bygone era that will greatly aid your army if you find them. So... how ''do'' you go about finding these treasures? Well, first, you're going to need a guide, because I have no idea how, on Elimine's green Earth, they expected people to find these things without one. Maybe it was a plan to sell more strategy guides, which, from a business perspective, makes sense, but is incredibly scummy from all others."
65	-->-- '''The Omni Blade''', "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=08xzEDSKssU Top 10 Worst Fire Emblem Maps]]"
66
67	->'''[[VideoGame/PaperMarioStickerStar Kersti]]:''' You don't happen to have any friends who can fly that far, do you?\
68	'''[[https://www.youtube.com/Charriii5 Charriii5]]:''' Uhh, not that I can think of. Not in this game. I don't THINK we've met anyone who can fly us up there. The only characters I can think of that can fly are Kamek and Bowser Jr., but why would THEY help us get up there? Where would I even find them? ''[[{{Beat}} (beat)]]'' ...Wiggler. The “friend that can fly me up there” is Wiggler. A character that I would have NO IDEA metamorphosized into Flutter unless I came back to visit him. And why the FUCK would I do THAT? I was taught that Wiggler could walk through poison, not fucking grow WINGS and FLY. Rewatching my footage, I paid attention to EVERY DAMN THING Wiggler said that would imply that he would become Flutter and the ONLY thing even CLOSE to him implying that he would undergo ANY sort of change, is him saying that he was going to eat a bunch of leaves and grow even MORE. This is after Kersti compliments him on growing PSYCHOLOGICALLY, not BIOLOGICALLY. I... do not understand how we were supposed to know this.
69	-->-- "[[https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qPmncDJBE2w&pp=ygUWY2hhcnJpaWk1IHN0aWNrZXIgc3Rhcg%3D%3D Everything Wrong With Paper Mario: Sticker Star in 39 Minutes]]"
70
71	->''"Oh... my... God. This is so '''easy'''! [[TakeThatAudience I mean, it's not like people would struggle with this for, like, twenty years, right? I mean, I figured this out in five seconds!]] How '''stupid''' do you have to be to not figure out that you go up and down? Up and down, remember, looks like a D-pad or some shit! Up... '''and down!''' I mean, seriously, if you die on this thing, like, play a new video game, maybe you-- maybe you should just not play video games in general if you can't figure out something this simple!"''
72	-->-- '''Franchise/SonicTheHedgehog''' on the '''[[VideoGame/Sonic3AndKnuckles "Barrel of Doom"]]''', [[https://youtu.be/2dZJFeepstU?feature=shared fandub]] of ''Webcomic/NotEnoughRings''
73
74	[[AC:Real Life]]
75	->''To get anywhere in ''VideoGame/HuntDownTheFreeman'' you need both a walkthrough and [[ObviousBeta a list of glitches]] handy. It’s that broken and obtuse.''
76	-->-- '''[[WebVideo/{{Jimquisition}} Jim Sterling]]''' [[https://twitter.com/JimSterling/status/969428742589288448 Tweet]]
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Context Quotes / GuideDangIt