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1[[quoteright:325:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/Best_of_Carly_Simon_1190.jpg]]
2->''You're so vain, you probably think this song is about you.\
3You're so vain, I'll bet you think this song is about you don't you? Don't you?''
4-->"You're So Vain"
5
6Born in UsefulNotes/NewYorkCity and now one of the most famous residents of Martha's Vineyard, Massachusetts, Carly Elisabeth Simon (born June 25, 1943) is an American SingerSongwriter who hit it big in the 1970s with a string of pop/soul hits with a blues sensibility.
7
8Simon's father Richard was co-founder of the Simon & Schuster publishing house. Her older sister Lucy is also a singer and musician, and the two of them started out performing together in the '60s as "The Simon Sisters" before Carly went solo. She was married to Music/JamesTaylor for a number of years, and they had two kids, Sally and Ben, who are also musicians (who in fact got their start singing backup on Mom's 1987 album ''Coming Around Again''); she's still close friends with James' brother Livingston.
9
10By far Simon's most famous song is "You're So Vain", a bouncily sarcastic hit about an egotistical male friend with a penchant for homewrecking and globetrotting hedonism. Considered the UrExample of the CelebrityBreakUpSong, [[WMG/YoureSoVainTheories speculation has been rampant for four decades]] about who it's about, but Simon has only publicly revealed three letters of the man's name: A, R, and E[[note]]which leaves out the man most assumed it was, Creator/JackNicholson[[/note]]. She has told a few people, including TV exec Dick (Rich'''a'''rd) '''E'''be'''r'''sol and Creator/HowardStern, but to everyone else, there has been a long list of speculated men, including Music/{{Mick J|agger}}'''[[Music/MickJagger a]]'''[[Music/MickJagger gg]]'''[[Music/MickJagger er]]''' (who sang backup on the song), [[Creator/WarrenBeatty W]]'''[[Creator/WarrenBeatty ar]]'''[[Creator/WarrenBeatty r]]'''[[Creator/WarrenBeatty e]]'''[[Creator/WarrenBeatty n Beatty]],[[note]]Fair enough. On November 18, 2015, she admitted the second verse is about him "but he thinks it's the whole song!"[[/note]] guitar builder D'''a'''ni'''e'''l A'''r'''mstrong, and record exec D'''a'''vid Law'''r'''ence G'''e'''ffen [[note]]Geffen has been openly gay for a very long time, but the rumor is that Simon was jealous of his professional favoritism towards his friend Joni Mitchell.[[/note]]. Even '''R''''''a'''ymond Dougl'''a'''s D'''a'''vi'''e'''s has been mentioned as a possible. Simon has openly said it is not about her ex-husband J'''a'''m'''e'''s Taylo'''r''', but did once joke about it being about D'''e'''ep Th'''r'''o'''a'''t (aka W. M'''ar'''k F'''e'''lt). [[note]]She apparently got the idea for the apricot scarf from Creator/NickNolte, who has only two of the required letters -- Nichol'''a'''s Nolt'''e'''.[[/note]] In 2015 she finally revealed that each of the three verses is actually about a different man, and the second one is Beatty, but she still intends to take the identities of the other two to her grave.
11
12Won an UsefulNotes/AcademyAward for "Let the River Run" for Creator/MikeNichols' ''Film/WorkingGirl''.
13----
14!!Tropes associated with Carly Simon include:
15
16* TheCameo: Music/JanetJackson sampled "You're So Vain" in her 2001 song "Son of a Gun," with Simon also contributing new vocals to the track. The result was Simon's first Top 40 single in 15 years (and her last to date).
17* TheDissTrack: Her song "You're So Vain" is a bouncily sarcastic hit about an egotistical male friend with a penchant for homewrecking and globetrotting hedonism. After several decades, Simon finally admitted that the song is at least partially about Warren Beatty. She would later allow it to be adapted for an anti-Donald Trump ad during the 2016 election campaign.
18* GenreBusting: Her songs are all over the map, with elements of rock, pop, easy listening, and soul in various ratios.
19* HypocriticalHumor: The fact that "You're So Vain" is written in the second person means that logically, whoever "you" is, it ''is'' "about you". That doesn't mean it's not vain to assume you ''are'' that person, though... (unless [[TakeAThirdOption it's really about three different people]].)
20* LastNoteNightmare: "That's The Way I've Always Heard It Should Be", already a rather dark and cynical AntiLoveSong, ends with her voice echoing off very eerily.
21* LyricalDissonance: This is very close to being one of Simon's signature songwriting techniques; her very first hit, "That's The Way I've Always Heard It Should Be", is a song with seemingly happy lyrics about beating the bad relationship odds, but a mournful, ''extremely'' ambivalent tune that indicates the singer doesn't really expect to come out on top. "Anticipation" (written about a fling with Music/CatStevens) has a distinctly triumphal tune but the words are about pre-first-date jitters. "Better Not Tell Her" sounds like an angry rant from a jealous ex, but it closes on a desperately sad and lonely note. "Jesse" is a deliriously happy song about wanting to see a man who is absolutely no good for her. "You Belong To Me" is a jazzy, sax-laden, almost seductive song about a woman who's terrified of losing her cheating lover. "All I Want Is You" is an uptempo soft-rock song with lyrics that could be interpreted either as the narrator finding quarrels with her lover sexually arousing, or being a brainwashed abuse victim suffering from Stockholm Syndrome. And then there's her cover of "Eensy-Weensy Spider", which serves as a reprise of the title track on ''Coming Around Again'', which is a song about a frustrated housewife living her life in a fog... [[MindScrew and it has her kids singing backup]].
22* ParentalLoveSong: The "Love of My Life" song was written in dedication to her children.
23* PopStarComposer: For a Franchise/WinnieThePooh movie, of all things.
24** Before that, she wrote and performed the theme song for ''WesternAnimation/TheLittleTwins''.
25* TheReveal: She's only given up clues about who the song "You're So Vain" is about. [[spoiler:On November 18 2015 [[http://www.ew.com/article/2015/11/18/carly-simon-youre-so-vain-verse-warren-beatty she revealed the second verse]] is about WarrenBeatty, meaning [[CompositeCharacter the other verses are about other men]] as well.]]
26* SelfTitledAlbum: Her 1971 debut.
27* SexySurfacingShot: The "You Know What To Do" music video has a shot of her dramatically surfacing out of the water in a MaleGaze shot after a swim at a pool, and then a similar shot occurs as she climbs the ladder.
28* SlapSlapKiss: Her minor 1988 hit "All I Want Is You" seems to be describe a relationship that is built on this, with lyrics that suggest the narrator finds sparring (at least verbally if not physically) sexually arousing. She also declares she doesn't want a polite, timid man "who tiptoes upstairs."
29%%* StatuesqueStunner: Stands at 5'10".
30* SurvivalMantra: "I haven't got time for the pain/ I haven't got room for the pain/ I haven't the need for the pain/ not since I've known you". Played with, as the song isn't defiant at all -- it's actually a mushy thank you note.
31* TakeThat: "You're So Vain", of course. Also "Better Not Tell Her", in a much more tragic vein.
32** Was on the receiving end of one from ex-husband Music/JamesTaylor. She gave him an ultimatum: cut back on his recording and touring to spend more time with her and the kids, or their marriage is over. The title of Taylor's next album? ''Dad Loves His Work''. They were divorced soon after.
33* ThemeTune: "Nobody Does It Better", for the Film/JamesBond film ''Film/TheSpyWhoLovedMe''. Includes a TitleDrop and some cutesy innuendo about "keeping all my secrets safe tonight".
34%%* ThirdWheel: "Two Hot Girls"
35%%* TooMuchInformation: "We Have No Secrets"
36* UnstoppableMailman: In the wake of the September 11, 2001 terror attacks on New York City and the Pentagon, the United States Postal Service [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qe_bIf0rbE4 released a commercial]] featuring Simon's song "Let the River Run" that reassured the nation that, despite everything that had happened, the people of the United States could still count on them. It's actually pretty heartwarming.
37* WordSaladLyrics: The famously cryptic "I had some dreams, they were clouds in my coffee" from "You're So Vain". She's explained that she took the imagery from an incident where she saw reflections of clouds in her cup of coffee on an airplane flight, but has left the metaphorical meaning of the line open to interpretation.
38* {{Yandere}}: Played with in "You Belong To Me" and "Better Not Tell Her", which could quite easily be about the same relationship, a decade apart. In both cases, there's begging, denial, and anger, but in neither one does the singer tip over into AxCrazy. There's some heavy SanitySlippage in "You Belong To Me", though.

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