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14[[quoteright:191:[[Webcomic/{{Precocious}} https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/nodynamite.png]]]]
15
16->''"If somebody you knew, whether they were a criminal or a window washer, constantly talked about "the rules", you would never want to hang out with this fuckin' nitwit, would you? You're washing the window and the fucker says, 'Rule #1. No streaks.' What an annoying dude. Get him away from me."''
17-->-- '''[[http://outlawvern.com Vern,]]''' reviewing ''Film/TheTransporter''
18
19He's in a dangerous or uncomfortable situation with other people who are less experienced or trustworthy than him, and he wants to make some things clear. So he bluntly declares a numbered list of "rules" for the situation. Beginning, of course, with Rule Number One, and following it with Rule Number Two, and so forth. The implication of setting out these rules, and providing a semblance of structure by numbering them, is that they are resolute and unquestionable, and that breaking these rules will lead to dire consequences.
20
21Given the nature of storytelling, expect these rules to be bent or outright broken at some point before the story is done. Often quite [[DramaticIrony ironically]].
22
23Another situation is conveying advice or admonishments, such as with the MentorArchetype or OldMaster. In this case, the rules could be "don't use the DangerousForbiddenTechnique" or "always believe in yourself." They are likely to include RuleZero: "I'm always right."
24
25One version of this trope [[MemeticMutation became so popular]] that 90% of these will be StockShoutOuts to ''Film/FightClub'' -- "Rule Number One of [X]: ''You do not talk about [X]''" and/or "Rule Number One: [Y]. Rule Number Two: '''[Y]'''!"
26
27ThereAreNoRules is an inversion, although that itself is sometimes called "Rule #1" nonetheless. This can then be subverted by having other rules follow which are actually restrictive.
28
29The ThievesGuild most often has each of its members adhere to certain numbered rules.
30
31For the [[Literature/{{Discworld}} other]] Rule Number One, see OldMaster.
32
33Characters who live by The Rules are obviously on the Lawful side of CharacterAlignment, but there's nothing stopping them from being LawfulGood or LawfulEvil. In fact, expect the latter from the ObstructiveBureaucrat who can cite any Rule that justifies him/her not doing anything remotely reasonable or helpful.
34
35See also ThingsYouAreNotAllowedToDo.
36----
37!!Examples:
38[[foldercontrol]]
39
40[[folder:Anime & Manga]]
41* The Manga/DeathNote has a ''lot'' of rules, but the one that's best-known is the first: "I. The human whose name is written in this note shall die."
42* There is to be no [[FantasticRacism discrimination]] between humans and robots in the ''Anime/TimeOfEve''.
43[[/folder]]
44
45[[folder:Comic Books]]
46* In a ''ComicBook/{{Batman}}: Black and White'' story, titled ''Rule Number One'', an unnamed young man training under Batman, likely one of the Robins, thinks about how many rules Batman has, but he can't remember if rule number one is no guns, or no killing. And when his motorcycle is stolen, Batman tells him about another rule number one: Never leave the keys in the ignition. He concludes that there are a lot of rule number ones in the vigilante business.
47* ''Comicbook/GuardiansOfTheGalaxy2020:'' Blackjack O'Hare's one rule - no Rocket Racoon '''ever'''. Naturally, seconds after he declares this, he finds out he's been contracted to kill Rocket Racoon.
48* ''ComicStrip/KnightsOfTheDinnerTable'': B.A. is fond of quoting the first rule of ''[=HackMaster=]'', which is "The GM is always right!".
49* In an issue of Alan Moore's ''ComicBook/WildCATsWildStorm'' run, one of the [[ComicBook/StormWatch MERCs]] says: "Rule number 1: Don't @#$%& us. There's no Rule number 2".
50[[/folder]]
51
52[[folder:Comic Strips]]
53* ''ComicStrip/FoxTrot'' has [[https://www.foxtrot.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/ft150913fontclub.png this]] strip spoofing the ''Fight Club'' meme by having rule #1 as "Do not talk about Font Club" and rule #2 as "Do not use Comic Sans".
54[[/folder]]
55
56[[folder:Fan Works]]
57* In some of [[https://m.fanfiction.net/u/2016983/Maudlin_Mush Maudlin Mush]]'s ''{{Series/Emergency}}'' stories, Joe, Kel and Dixie discuss and think about Rule Number One-don't get emotionally involved with cases- when helping Johnny recover from his many injuries. In one story, Kel says that Rule Number One was 'demolished' or something along those lines, and another time, he thinks to himself that "maybe Rule Number One was just a suggestion'. They're not ashamed to help a friend when he needs it, rule or no rule.
58* In ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12188150/1/Like-Grains-of-Sand-in-the-Hourglass Like Grains of Sand in the Hourglass]]'' Tonks mentally quotes Mad-Eye Moody's Auror training rules when in an applicable situation. The few which are given range from Rule 0[[note]]''In some battles - and most wars - you have to accept sometimes that the best possible outcome is simply not losing.''[[/note]] to Rule 122.[[note]]''You can look a gift horse in the mouth, but be prepared to be flattened by the fist flying out of its gullet.''[[/note]]
59[[/folder]]
60
61[[folder:Film -- Animation]]
62* ''WesternAnimation/{{Aladdin}}'''s Genie.
63-->'''Genie:''' Rule number one: I can't kill anybody, so don't ask. Rule number two: I can't make anybody fall in love. Mwa! You little punim there. Rule number three: I can't bring people back from the dead. It's not a pretty picture. I don't like doing it!
64* Phil from ''WesternAnimation/{{Hercules}}'' has a whole list of rules for being a hero.
65-->'''Phil:''' Rule number six: When rescuing a damsel, always handle with care.\
66'''Phil:''' Rule number ninety-five: Concentrate.\
67'''Phil:''' Rule number ninety-six: Aim.
68* ''WesternAnimation/IceAgeDawnOfTheDinosaurs'': "Rule number one: Always listen to Buck!"
69* ''WesternAnimation/MonstersInc'':
70-->'''Yeti:''' Rule number one out here: ''Always''... no, ''never'' go out in a blizzard.
71* The Miramax cut of ''WesternAnimation/TheThiefAndTheCobbler'', when the thief is on a tightrope.
72-->'''Thief:''' Rule number one: Keep your eye on the wire and have feet like a monkey. Rule number two: It's always good to wear underwear when you're up this high, otherwise you could attract a sizable crowd. That brings us to rule number three.
73** He can't remember rule number three.
74* In ''WesternAnimation/WreckItRalph'', the most important rule in ''[[ShowWithinAShow Hero's Duty]]'' is "Never interfere with the first-person shooter!".
75[[/folder]]
76
77[[folder:Film -- Live-Action]]
78* Inverted in ''Film/BabylonAD'' where it's Sister Rebeka who gives the rules to badass mercenary Toorop before the LiveActionEscortMission, the last of which is "No foul language." Toorop gives a not-quite amused smile and immediately breaks the rule.
79-->'''Toorop:''' You listen to my one and only rule. Don't fuck with me. Or I'll leave you standing in the middle of nowhere with nothing but your ass to sell to get back here."
80** When their relationship loosens up a bit, Toorop admits that Rule Number One for a mercenary is [[RealMenCook learning how to cook]].
81* ''Film/FightClub'':
82** "The first rule of Fight Club is - you do not talk about Fight Club."
83** "The second rule of Fight Club is - you '''do not''' talk about Fight Club." Just in case you were curious. [[spoiler: Because he doesn't want the ending spoiled. That's right, he was talking to YOU LOT.]]
84* ''Film/{{Fluke}}'': Rumbo (Samuel L. Jackson) delivers a variety of Rule Number Ones throughout the movie as a catch phrase.
85* In the film ''Film/{{Goodfellas}}'', Henry learns the two most important things in life:
86-->'''Jimmy:''' Never rat on your friends and always keep your mouth shut.
87* ''Film/TheGumballRally'':
88-->'''Franco:''' Remember the number one rule of Italian racing.\
89''[Franco grabs the rear view mirror and breaks it off of its mount]''\
90'''Franco:''' What's-a behind me is not important.
91* ''Film/JamesBond''
92** ''Film/YouOnlyLiveTwice'' has Tiger Tanaka, the head of the Japanese secret service, introducing Bond to his harem of Japanese beauties who proceed to bathe him while Bond is relaxing in an onsen.
93--->'''Tanaka:''' Rule #1 is never do anything for yourself when someone else can do it for you.\
94'''Bond:''' And #2?\
95'''Tanaka:''' Rule #2: In Japan, men always come first, women come second.\
96'''Bond:''' I might just retire to here.
97** ''Film/LiveAndLetDie''. Bond seduces the virginal Solitaire for information (citing Lesson No. 1: no secrets between lovers) only to find out she doesn't know much about what the BigBad is up to on his IslandBase. So Bond is determined to go look for himself and makes it clear that she's coming with him. "Togetherness is Lesson Number 2." Solitaire asks coyly if there's [[ComeBackToBedHoney time for Lesson Number 3]] before they go.
98--->'''Bond:''' Certainly, darling. [[DoubleEntendre There's no point in going off half-cocked.]]
99* ''Film/TheKarateKidPartII'':
100-->'''Mr. Miyagi:''' Aha... here are the Two Rules of Miyagi-Ryu Karate. Rule Number One: "Karate for defense only." Rule Number Two: "Always remember Rule Number One."
101* ''Film/TheProducers'': There are two cardinal rules to being a Broadway Producer...
102-->''Rule 1:'' Never put your own money in the show.\
103''Rule 2:'' '''[[NoIndoorVoice NEVER PUT YOUR OWN MONEY IN THE SHOW!]]'''
104* ''Film/{{Scream 1996}}'': Randy Meeks's rules to surviving a scary movie, with Rule Number One being, [[SexSignalsDeath "you can never have sex"]].
105* ''Film/StarshipTroopers'': "This is for all you new people: I only have one rule. Everyone fights. No one quits. You don't do your job, I'll shoot you myself. You get me?"
106* In ''Film/SwordOfGideon'' (1986). The first rule given to the protagonist by a Mossad firearms instructor is always use a DoubleTap when shooting someone. "''Fumph-fumph'' never goddamn ''fumph!''"
107* ''Film/TheTransporter'':
108** The eponymous "transporter" Frank Martin has three rules: 1) don't alter the deal after it's been made. 2) No names. 3) Never open the package he's been asked to transport. All his troubles start when he breaks the third rule and finds the "package" is a BoundAndGagged young Asian woman. As a result, he ends up breaking the first two rules as well.
109** In the sequel Frank has a Rule #4 which is "Never make a promise you can't keep." He promises to protect his young charge; when the boy is kidnapped, the BigBad informs Frank he's going to have to break that rule. [[IGaveMyWord Fat chance.]]
110* ''Film/Twins1988'': The rules of a crisis situation.
111-->'''Rule 1:''' Don't move too soon.\
112'''Rule 2:''' If you choose to bluff, you must be prepared to have your bluff called.\
113'''Rule 3:''' Duck.
114* ''Film/{{Zombieland}}'' has Columbus' list of 32 rules for surviving the ZombieApocalypse.
115-->'''Rule 1:''' [[IndyEscape Cardio]].\
116'''Rule 2:''' DoubleTap.\
117'''Rule 3:''' [[CampingACrapper Beware of bathrooms]].\
118'''Rule 17:''' [[KnowWhenToFoldEm Don't be a hero]].\
119[[spoiler:'''Rule 17:''' [[DareToBeBadass Be a hero]].]]
120* When a drunk Carl gets into a bar fight in ''Film/YesMan''. "First we need to set a few ground rules. The first ground run is... There are no ground rules!" [Throws a surprise punch hitting a bystander instead of the guy he's in the fight with.]
121[[/folder]]
122
123[[folder:Jokes]]
124* A common gag sign at workplaces:
125-->'''Rule #1:''' The boss is always right.
126-->'''Rule #2:''' If the boss is wrong, refer to Rule #1
127[[/folder]]
128
129[[folder:Literature]]
130* ''Literature/TheActsOfCaine'': Matthew Stover's Caine has three rules. They really boil down to "I'm the boss and can kill you to maintain this authority", and serve more to operate as a [[BadassCreed coercive threat than as a code of behaviour]]. If he ever asks you "What's Rule Two?", then you are in '''[[PreMortemOneLiner deep shit]]'''.
131* In ''Literature/AliceInWonderland'', the King of Hearts reads out Rule Forty-two: "All persons more than a mile high to leave the court."
132-->"Well, I sha'n't go, at any rate," said Alice: "besides, that's not a regular rule: you invented it just now."\
133"It's the oldest rule in the book," said the King.\
134"Then it ought to be Number One," said Alice.
135* ''Literature/ACivilCampaign'': Miles Vorkosigan's cousin Ivan, critiquing someone else's covert op that almost failed miserably: "You play games like that with the big boys, you'd better make damn sure you win, Miles says. Rule One. And there is no Rule Two."
136* In ''Literature/DirkGentlysHolisticDetectiveAgency'', Richard is breaking into his girlfriend's apartment when he receives a mysterious phone call describing "the rules of breaking into an apartment". Rule number one is "never answer the phone". It continues in much the same vein, including the caller saying Richard would see him if he looked out the window and then, as Richard sees a distant flashbulb go off, explaining Rule four is "Never stand where you can be photographed", and:
137-->'''Caller''': Rule five ... Are you listening to me, [=MacDuff=]?\
138'''Richard''': What? Yes. How do you know me?\
139'''Caller''': Rule five. Never admit your name.
140* ''Literature/DreamPark'': Al the Barbarian, leader of one of the competing teams in ''The California Voodoo Game'', has a Rule Number One for live-action adventure gaming:
141-->''"Something in the next shadow is waiting to eat your face."''
142* ''Literature/GarrettPI'' gives us Morley Dotes's Rule #1: "Never get involved with a woman crazier than yourself."
143* ''Literature/TheGreatGreeneHeist'': Jackson has a set of rules for his HighSchoolHustler antics. Rule #1 is "No matter how simple a job looks, always plan before you act. A poorly constructed plan usually yields undesirable results." It's a rule Jackson is good at sticking to.
144* During ''Literature/JourneyToChaos'', Nolien remembers that the 1st rule of healers is "do no harm", [[NiceJobBreakingItHero right after his status buff drives his teammate to monsanity to defeat a swarm of monsters]].
145* From ''Literature/MassEffectRevelation'':
146-->"I have two rules I follow," Saren explained. "The first is: never kill someone without a reason."\
147"And the second?" Anderson asked, suspicious.\
148"You can always find a reason to kill someone."
149* ''Literature/{{Sharpe}}'': Richard Sharpe has three rules for the men who serve under him: 1) Don't get drunk without permission. 2) Don't steal unless it is from the enemy or you are starving. 3) When it is time to fight, fight like bastards.
150* From ''The Middle of Nowhere,'' the second volume of David Gerrold's ''Literature/StarWolf'' trilogy, trainee Apprentice Engineer Robert Gatineau discovers through multiple encounters that Rule #1 is "Whatever your superior officer says it is."
151* In Terry Pratchett's novel ''Literature/ThiefOfTime'', the elderly martial arts master Lu-Tze often reminds people about Rule One. Unfortunately for them, not everyone gets the message. Rule One is: "[[MuggingTheMonster Never act incautiously when confronted]] by a [[OldMaster little bald wrinkly smiling man]]!" Then there's Rule Nineteen, which is "Never forget Rule One, and ask yourself why it was invented in the first place." As you can probably guess, Lu-Tze is the reason Rule One exists, and you should ''never'' let his [[BewareTheSillyOnes silly tricks]] or [[ObfuscatingStupidity his habit of feigning helplessness]] make you forget Rule One.
152[[/folder]]
153
154[[folder:Live-Action TV]]
155* In ''Series/TheAndyGriffithShow'' episode "The Big House", Barney Fife lays down the law for two new inmates at the jail:
156-->'''Barney:''' Now, here at the Rock we have two basic rules. Memorize them, so that you can say them in your sleep. The first rule is: Obey all rules. Secondly, do not write on the walls, as it takes a lot of work to erase writing off of walls.
157* ''Series/BuffyTheVampireSlayer'':
158** "The first rule of Slaying: Don't die!" Buffy breaks this one ''twice'' and is still around to be scolded by Giles.
159** In "Real Me" Buffy states the Rule Number One of living in Sunnydale is "[[MustBeInvited Do not invite blood-sucking dead people into your home!]]" Buffy [[RomanticVampireBoy breaks that rule too]].
160* Unproduced 2008 TV pilot ''Captain Cook's Extraordinary Atlas'' [[http://tvwriting.googlepages.com/pilotschool (available here)]] mentions three rules that were followed by Captain James Cook when exploring the more fantastic areas of the Earth, and that were supposed to be followed by subsequent "navigators".
161* Harry taught ''Series/{{Dexter}}'' a code to control his psychopathic tendencies. It had whole sections to make sure he only went after bad guys, but as he tells [[spoiler:James Doakes]] toward the end of season 2 in response to the suggesting that he turn himself in, Rule Number One was always Don't Get Caught. According to Harry, that was the point of the whole endeavor, keeping Dexter alive; thus it's the first rule. [[spoiler:Of course, no one wants anyone, even oneself, to know that he's turned his adopted son into a gory weapon of his own vigilantism. Not that it's cut-and-dried.]]
162* ''Series/DoctorWho'':
163** "[[Recap/DoctorWhoS24E4Dragonfire Dragonfire]]": The Doctor welcomes a new companion:
164--->'''The Doctor:''' Do you fancy a quick trip around the twelve galaxies and then back to Perivale in time for tea?\
165'''Ace:''' Ace!\
166'''The Doctor:''' But, there are three rules. One: I'm in charge.\
167'''Ace:''' Whatever you say, Professor.\
168'''The Doctor:''' Two, I'm not the Professor, I'm the Doctor.\
169'''Ace:''' Whatever you want.\
170'''The Doctor:''' And the third... Well, I'll think up the third by the time we get back to Perivale.
171*** In the ''Literature/DoctorWhoNewAdventures'' novel ''Set Piece'' Ace, seemingly left with no choice but to kill the Doctor to save the universe, flashes back to this conversation (and occasions when the Doctor had to make similar decisions) and decides that the third rule — ''her'' rule — is "No-one deserves to be sacrificed".
172** In the new series, the following is said to companions, not that they ever listen:
173--->'''The Doctor:''' [[Recap/DoctorWhoS28E4TheGirlInTheFireplace Rule One: Don't wander off.]]
174** In "[[Recap/DoctorWhoS29E8HumanNature Human Nature]]", the Doctor leaves a set of 23 numbered rules for Martha to follow while he's transformed into a human and unaware of his true identity. In actuality, there were only about five instructions in the script (as Martha fast-forwards through most of them), and David Tennant [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dsGzSz0KyNI hilariously ad-libbed dialogue for the skipped parts]].
175*** In the original ''[[Recap/DoctorWhoNewAdventuresHumanNature Human Nature]]'' novel, the list the Doctor gave Benny only has nine rules on it. The five Tennant actually gives are there, including [[DoesNotLikeSpam the one about pears]].
176** River Song's personal Rule One is "The Doctor lies." It turns out [[spoiler:she was given that rule by the Doctor]], along with Rule 7: "Never run when you're scared," Rule 27: "Never knowingly be serious," and Rule 408: "You should always waste time when you don't have any. Time is not the boss of you."
177** The Doctor's friend Franchise/IrisWildthyme has "Wildthyme's Law Rule Number One", which changes every time to something pertinent to the current situation. Among other things, this rule has been "Grab the nearest bottle and hope for the best" and "A girl never knows when she may need to get the party started."
178** In [[Recap/DoctorWhoS38E1E2Spyfall "Spyfall"]], the Doctor tells her companions that the first rule of espionage is "Trust no-one." Given that the Doctor is a natural rulebreaker, it's not surprising she forgets the rule and gets in trouble. The trope is amusingly lampshaded later on.
179--->'''Yaz:''' Ryan, you're panicking. Rule 1--no panicking.
180--->'''Ryan:''' I thought Rule 1 was don't trust anybody?
181--->'''Yaz:''' Rule 1a, then. [[BreadEggsBreadedEggs No panicking while you're not trusting anyone.]]
182* ''{{Series/Emergency}}'' In "The Promotion", Roy and Dixie discuss 'Rule Number One': Don't get emotionally involved with the patients. The ep showed how hard it can be to keep to this rule, given what first responders see in their work.
183* ''Series/TheGirlsGuideToDepravity'' is all about a set of rules for women in dating and sexual situations. Even the women who are following them know they're fairly dangerous.
184* ''Series/InterviewWithTheVampire2022'':
185** Lestat de Lioncourt and Claudia's [[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x8o550g?playlist=x7zezf "Vampire Rules" promos]] contain a set of rules that fledgling vampires should abide by and facts that they should know.
186*** Lestat's list:
187---->Rule 1 -- [[DisposingOfABody Cleanliness is key.]]\
188Rule 2 -- Live off the blood of the living.\
189Rule 3 -- Let the food come to you.\
190Rule 4 -- [[WeakenedByTheLight Stay out of the sun.]]\
191Rule 5 -- [[{{Telepathy}} Vampires can read minds.]]\
192Rule 6 -- Suck it.
193*** Claudia's list:
194---->Rule 1 -- Your maker can't hear your thoughts.\
195Rule 2 -- No secrets between family.\
196Rule 3 -- Human food tastes like chalk.\
197Rule 4 -- Don't overindulge.\
198Rule 5 -- Don't eat cops.
199** "[[Recap/InterviewWithTheVampire2022S1E6LikeAngelsPutInHellByGod Like Angels Put in Hell by God]]": Louis de Pointe du Lac and Claudia impose several conditions that their vampire father Lestat must follow in order for him to be accepted back into their family. Viewers don't get to hear the first three requirements.
200--->'''Louis''': Rule number four.\
201'''Claudia''': Kill [[TheMistress Antoinette]].\
202[...]\
203'''Claudia''': I'm not your child anymore. That's rule number five. I'll be your companion, your sister.\
204'''Lestat''': It's not as simple as choosing a new family configuration. "Now I'm your cousin." "Now I'm your aunt." I am your maker!\
205'''Claudia''': But not my uncle or my daddy. I'm your sister or that's the door.\
206'''Louis''': Rule number six. No lies, and that includes lies of exaggeration and of omission. For instance, if you can fly, tell us you can fly.
207* In ''Series/TheITCrowd'', "the first rule of ''Street Countdown''... [[SubvertedTrope is that you really must try and tell as many people as possible about it]]. It's a rather fun game and the more people you tell about it the better."
208* ''Series/LittleLunch'': In "The Joke Competition", Atticus announces that the first rule of the joke competition is that everyone must tell a joke. This is also the second and third rules.
209* In one of the most well-known ''Series/{{MASH}}'' episodes ("Sometimes You Hear the Bullet" - the show's first WhamEpisode and its GrowingTheBeard moment), Henry Blake tells Hawkeye:
210-->'''Col. Blake:''' All I know is what they taught me at command school. There are certain rules about a war. And rule number one is young men die. And rule number two is, doctors can't change rule number one.
211* ''Series/MontyPythonsFlyingCircus'' reads out the faculty rules of the Philosophy Department of the University of Woolamaloo:
212-->"Rule one - no pooftahs. Rule two, no member of the faculty is to maltreat the Abbos in any way whatsoever - [[NotCheatingUnlessYouGetCaught if there's anybody watching]]. Rule three - no pooftahs. Rule four - I don't want to catch anyone not drinking in their room after lights out. Rule five - no pooftahs. Rule six - ThereIsNoRuleSix! Rule seven - [[OverlyLongGag no pooftahs]]. That concludes the reading of the rules, Bruce."
213* ''Series/{{NCIS}}'': Gibbs' various rules, cited by the characters throughout the show. A flashback revealed them to have been inspired by his future wife on the day they met. Kate and Ziva both requested that Gibbs write the rules down, only to be told that most of the rules are for day-to-day tasks. Rules in the forties are reserved for emergencies.
214** TWO rules are apparently number one (and two rule number threes), likely due to an oversight on the part of the writers, although later confirmed to have been intentional. This was lampshaded when the female version of Gibbs from CGIS told [=McGee=] HER rule number one and suggested he write it down. [=McGee=] replies that rule number one has been taken, twice. The other one was inherited from Mike Franks, Gibbs' boss when he first became an NCIS Agent. Mike Franks told Gibbs that he didn't need a list of rules; he only needed "Three Golden Rules". It has not been revealed which of the rules are Gibbs' and which are Franks, nor has the second Rule Number 2.
215** In one episode, other main characters remember Gibbs's rules through flashbacks, note that some of the numbers get taken more than once, or that two different number rules say the same thing, and start wondering if Gibbs just makes them up on the fly.
216** Two episodes have shown Gibbs updating his rules:
217*** "Rule 51" is about the titular rule "Sometimes, you're wrong."
218*** "Rule 91", Mark Harmon's final episode as Gibbs, is also about the titular rule, which is an addendum to Rule 11 "When the job is done, walk away" which admitted to having following - "When you decide to walk away, don't look back".
219** [[LabRat Abby Sciuto]] has her own Rule 1: Don't lie to Abby.
220* ''Series/{{Porridge}}'': According to Mr. Mackay, there are only two rules in Slade Prison. Rule number 1: Do not write on the walls. And rule number 2: Obey all the rules. What's strange is that in the same scene he brings up a rule against more than three prisoners congregating in a cell.
221* ''Series/{{Psych}}'': In "Scary Sherry: Bianca's Toast", Gus has very specific rules for going in the abandoned mental institution.
222-->"I will not enter a room first. I will not enter a room last. I will not investigate any suspicious noises or go looking for a fuse box. And you will not, under any circumstances, leave me by myself without a weapon of some sort. Do you understand and agree to my terms? "
223* In ''Series/RedDwarf'', Kryten would often quote the Space Corps Directives, with a number each time. Rimmer would try to do the same, but get the numbers wrong; for example, quoting Directive 34124, which Kryten informed him was "No officer with false teeth should attempt oral sex in zero gravity."
224* ''Series/RobocopTheSeries'' had an episode featuring Murphy's old partner, a cop with a set of rules amounting to "no vigilantism". When said cop was brainwashed, Robo brought him back by making him say his rules. A minute later, he was [[RedemptionEqualsDeath killed with a rocket launcher]].
225* ''Series/TheSlammer'': According to Mr Burgess there are two rules to Dance Club. Rule number 1: You must dance! And rule number two: No fizzy drinks near the stage!
226* ''Series/{{Spaced}}'': ''Film/FightClub'' is parodied in "Robot Club":
227-->'''Robot Club Leader:''' Gentlemen, welcome to Robot Club. The first rule of Robot Club is, you do not talk about Robot Club. The second rule of Robot Club is, YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT Ro? wait, I? got that wrong. ''[Unfolding a crumpled up piece of paper and pushing up his glasses]'' The second rule is, no smoking.\
228'''Tim:''' Why aren't we allowed to smoke?\
229'''Mike:''' Shh, we're not allowed to talk about it.
230* ''Fetch with Ruff Ruffman'', during Season 1's first episode, Ruff makes it very clear he doesn't want Studio G to ever be called "The Garage" as it makes him feel insecure.
231* ''Franchise/StarTrek'':
232** The Ferengi are immensely fond of quoting Rules of Acquisition.
233--->First Rule of Acquisition: Once you have their money, you never give it back.\
23433rd Rule of Acquisition: It never hurts to suck up to the boss.\
23545th Rule of Acquisition: Expand or die.\
236Unwritten Rule of Acquisition: When no appropriate rule applies, make one up.
237** [[PlayingWithATrope Played with]]: the first Rule of Acquisition was presented as #162 - to create a demand for #1 through #161, and according to Quark's vision, they're only rules because the "Guidelines of Acquisition" doesn't have the same selling power. A complete list of the rules (canon and non-canon) can be found [[http://memory-alpha.org/wiki/Rules_of_Acquisition here]].
238** Ensign Robin Lefler, who appeared in one episode of ''Series/StarTrekTheNextGeneration'', "The Game", had "Lefler's Laws", a list of rules she made up for herself. She still uses them when she becomes a main character in ''Literature/StarTrekNewFrontier''.
239** The [[AlienNonInterferenceClause Prime Directive]] is the Federation's Rule Number One.
240** PlayedForLaughs in ''Series/StarTrekEnterprise'' when our heroes are headed to Risa for shore leave and Trip wears a Hawaiian shirt that nearly makes T'Pol's ears bleed:
241--->'''T'Pol:''' If you're wearing that to impress the women on Risa, you may as well stay on board.\
242'''Trip:''' Rule Number One: You gotta be seen to get noticed, and I plan on gettin' noticed.\
243'''Archer:''' Don't say she didn't warn you.
244* ''Series/ThunderInParadise'': Spence & Bru [[RunningGag continuously]] quote different "rule[s] #2" at each other, but never get around to mentioning Rule #1.
245* A short-lived BBC sitcom called ''Series/WorldOfPub'' had "Drink Club", where prize-winning hard drinker Raymundo Rinaldo Rivaldo (played by Peter Serafinowicz) trains others in the art of drinking, but spends the entire first session reciting the 82 rules of Drink Club. The first ''nine'' rules of Drink Club are... well, guess. The tenth rule?
246-->'''Raymundo''': The tenth rule of Drink Club is: you do not talk about ''Film/FightClub''. It is a terrible film with a stupid TwistEnding. Rivaldo will not have it mentioned!
247[[/folder]]
248
249[[folder:Pro Wrestling]]
250* Wrestling/{{Progress Wrestling}} has as stated by co-owner Jim Smallman and the fans in attendance at the start of every show - 'Don't be a dick!' Also, if it's your first Progress show 'It's your round.'
251[[/folder]]
252
253[[folder:Sports]]
254* In football, there is an old rule. Rule One says that the referee is ''always'' right. Rule 1a is a law that says if the referee is ever ''wrong'', refer to Rule One. In other words - put up, shut up and don't argue.
255[[/folder]]
256
257[[folder:Theatre]]
258* In ''Franklin's Big Adventure'', a stage show based on the ''Literature/{{Franklin}}'' television show and books, Franklin is seriously weirded out by the seeming oddness of the museum-guide, Carbunkel, who presents herself as a "highly respected professional guide person" and among other things presents a list of rules for the museum visit with the help of a group of singers, in the middle of a song she's singing herself.
259-->'''Miss Carbunkel:''' But before we make our way beyond those doors, there are a few things we must all be aware of.\
260'''Vocalists:''' ''Rrrule number one!''\
261'''Miss Carbunkel:''' Stay together. We can't have you youngsters running all over the place.\
262'''Vocalists:''' ''Rrrule number two!''\
263'''Miss Carbunkel:''' Don't touch anything! The museum is filled with old and very delicate objects that haven't felt the warmth of a human hand in thousands of years. And...\
264'''Vocalists''': ''Rrrule number three!''\
265'''Miss Carbunkel:''' When I say "JustForFun/{{hello}}," I want you to say hello right back at me!
266[[/folder]]
267
268[[folder:Video Games]]
269* ''VideoGame/ConkersBadFurDay'': In the 'Heist' multiplayer:
270-->'''Don Weaso:''' Rule number one: My way, or 'he's a dead mother(bleep)' way.
271* ''VideoGame/GearsOfWar'' has only one rule (or Golden Rule, if you wish): ''Take cover or die.''
272* In ''Videogame/Injustice2'', courtesy of Black Manta:
273-->'''Black Manta:''' First rule: Don't leave loose ends.
274* ''VideoGame/MarkOfTheNinja'': Right at the start of the game:
275-->'''Ora:''' Rule number one: [[TryNotToDie Don't get me killed]].
276* ''VideoGame/MassEffect2'': While on Omega:
277-->'''Aria T'Loak:''' Omega has no titled ruler and only one rule: Don't ''[[PrecisionFStrike fuck]]'' with Aria.
278* ''VideoGame/StarWarsRepublicCommando'': There are quite a few the Commandos quote on occasion.
279-->'''Scorch:''' Rule #1: Kill 'em before they kill you.\
280'''Scorch:''' Sev, did that corpse give you a nasty look?\
281'''Sev:''' Rule 17...\
282'''Scorch:''' We know, always make sure they're dead.\
283'''Scorch:''' Rule 23: Never pull sentry duty on an empty stomach.\
284'''Scorch:''' Sev, hey, I thought you were invincible.\
285'''Sev:''' Rule 39: Never say no to bacta.\
286'''Scorch:''' One's an anomaly, two's a trend. Rule 89, Boss.
287[[/folder]]
288
289[[folder:Webcomics]]
290* Charlie's Rules for his Archons in ''{{Webcomic/Erfworld}}'' include:
291-->'''Rule #3:''' We are in the business of solving problems for our clients.
292-->'''Corollary:''' Creating problems for our clients creates business.
293** ...but there's also an all-purpose loophole:
294--->'''Rule #19:''' Charlie's rules need to be bent sometimes.
295--->'''Corollary:''' Most of the time Charlie's rules don't need to be bent.
296* Zeetha of ''Webcomic/GirlGenius'' considers the first order of business for any princess to be acquiring an imposing battle axe.
297* In ''Webcomic/KnightsOfBuenaVista'', the first rule for encounters is to never take their eyes off the map. Thus they have to improvise fast when their {{player character}}s are fleeing wolves and then realize almost too late that their sled is headed for a cliff.
298* ''Webcomic/NoNeedForBushido'' has "[[http://noneedforbushido.com/2009/comic/342/ Ken's rules to fight'n]]":
299-->'''[[TheBigGuy Ken]]:''' First, in battle yer either killin' or dyin'. So whatever you do, don't ever stop ''not dying.'' Second, [[ThereAreNoRules we don't have time for stupid rules]]. So stop just standing around ''like a buncha idiots,'' and start '''beat'n the crap outta each other!'''
300* ''Webcomic/TheOrderOfTheStick'': [[http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0617.html here]]. Nobody leaves the Thieves Guild of Greysky City, except in a casket. Vampires can't even leave in one of those.
301* ''WebComic/{{Precocious}}'' has so far subjected the kids to two numbered rules.
302** [[http://www.precociouscomic.com/archive/comic/2010/10/12 Rule #1]]: [[spoiler:No dying!]]
303** [[http://www.precociouscomic.com/archive/comic/2009/07/29 Rule #4]]: [[spoiler:No dynamite.]]
304* ''WebComic/SchlockMercenary'':
305** The ''[[WritingAroundTrademarks Seventy Maxims of Maximally Effective Mercenaries]]''. Rule one: Pillage, ''then'' burn. (It's important enough that Schlock makes a point of stating- once- "If they burn all of the best stuff, I'm going to be ''very'' unhappy.")
306** [[http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2012-12-24 The first rule of AI kill switches is "don't talk about the kill switch"]]
307* ''Webcomic/StandStillStaySilent'':
308** Given in one of the [[EncyclopediaExposita info pages]] is ''"The First Rule for survival outside of the safe areas: If you come across a Beast, a Troll or a Giant, do not run or call for help but [[{{TitleDrop}} stand still and stay silent]]. It might go away."''
309*** We have yet to see an example of anyone following this rule in practice: Emil in particular usually does the exact opposite, probably with good cause. One can however imagine Lalli practicing the rule on his unseen solo excursions. However, at the beginning of Chapter 7, a cat does follow this rule to hide successfully from an infected dog. [[spoiler:For a while.]]
310** Sigrun also mentions the number one ground rule [[http://sssscomic.com/comic.php?page=236 here]]: "We stay together!". What's funny is that moments later she completely dismisses that rule, even forgetting saying that at all.
311* ''Webcomic/TRULifeAdventures:'' Don't tell Jack anything. [[spoiler:Revealed when Jack found out it exists.]]
312* ''WebComic/{{xkcd}}'': [[http://xkcd.com/703/ The first rule of the tautology club is the first rule of the tautology club.]]
313** [[http://xkcd.com/922/ The first rule of talking to me about movies is do NOT talk about Fight Club.]]
314** [[http://xkcd.com/878/ The second rule of model train layouts: No nesting]].
315[[/folder]]
316
317[[folder:Web Original]]
318* From ''Toys/{{Bionicle}}: Federation of Fear'':
319-->'''Carapar''': Rule number one: [[DoNotTauntCthulhu don't annoy the giant, tentacled monster!]]
320* [[VideoGame/SuperSmashBros First rule of]] UsefulNotes/FurryFandom: [[http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/442158 You don't recover]]
321* During the ''WebVideo/GameGrumps'' episode of ''Dennis the Menace'', Mr. Wilson explains the rules of Buttball to Dennis ("Seeing as you're already in my basement...")
322-->'''Rule number one:''' Never tell your parents.\
323'''Rule number two:''' NEVER TELL YOUR PARENTS!
324* The CouchGag on No Rolls Barred's Board Game Club is this, "where the first rule of Board Game Club is [a silly, off the wall rule]".
325* Rule34, one of the RulesOfTheInternet. As mentioned in the [[Franchise/StarTrek Ferengi Rules of Acquisition]] example, above, 34 was the first one created, the rest followed afterward. Another famous one with its own page is Rule63.
326* JustForFun/RulesOfAnime.
327* In the series ''[[WebVideo/IsaacArthur Science and Futurism with Issac Arthur]]'', a running gag whenever Isaac discusses military applications of future technologies is *every* rule is the First Rule of Warfare.
328* Website/TVTropes Wiki has Administrivia/ThreeRulesOfThree.
329* Website/{{Tumblr}}'s Rule #1 is "Don't Post Anything From Tumblr on Website/{{Facebook}}."
330[[/folder]]
331
332[[folder:Western Animation]]
333* In ''WesternAnimation/AdventuresOfTheGalaxyRangers'', Doc has a list of reasons explaining why he is sorry he became a Galaxy Ranger. He only quotes [[DrivesLikeCrazy when Goose is driving]].
334* Parodied in ''WesternAnimation/{{Archer}}'', when Archer is teaching Cyril how to be an agent - ''every'' rule is "Rule Number One".
335* ''WesternAnimation/BatmanTheAnimatedSeries''. In "Sins of the Father", Batman has taken on a new member of the Bat-Family: Tim Drake.
336-->'''Bruce:''' You work with me, Tim, you follow the rules. Rule No. 1: you give me everything you've got. Rule No. 2: Then you give me more. And Rule No. 3...''(Tim lunges only for Bruce to take him down)'' *I* make the rules.
337-->'''Dick Grayson:''' ''(WalkInChimeIn)'' Watch out for that last one, kid. It's a killer.
338* ''WesternAnimation/DragonsRidersOfBerk'': In "Live and Let Fly", Hiccup establishes a secret 'Dragon Flight Club'. The first rule of Dragon Flight Club is "There is no Dragon Flight Club". This confuses the twins no end.
339* On ''WesternAnimation/FamilyGuy'', Peter recounts the story of his ancestor, Moses Griffin, who led the Hebrews out of Egypt. His Rule Number One: Shut the hell up.
340* ''WesternAnimation/TheFairlyOddParents'': In "Kung Timmy", when Timmy faces Francis in a kung-fu fight and rides a tetherball to deliver the final blow, he uses this for a PreAssKickingOneLiner.
341-->'''Timmy:''' You forgot the first rule of Kung-Timmy, Francis: ''What goes around comes around!''
342* ''WesternAnimation/TheGrimAdventuresOfBillyAndMandy:''' In "To Eris Human", Eris shows Mandy how to spread chaos and gives her the first rule: "''Everybody'' is a target." This motto gets [[IronicEcho turned around on her]] at the end, when Mandy tricks her into kissing Grim in a darkened theater, mockingly stating "First rule, Eris."
343-->'''Mandy:''' First rule: ''I'' rule.
344* Wolf from ''WesternAnimation/KipoAndTheAgeOfWonderbeasts'' keeps a list of Rules on the Surface that comes up regularly as a running gag. Or she's just making them up as she goes... Briefly discussed when Kipo wonders if the rules are actually numbered in that order.
345* ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'': As [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Evans_(producer) Robert Evans]] told himself when working on ''Film/{{Chinatown}}'''s sequel ''Film/TheTwoJakes'', you must never forget Hollywood Rule Number One: [[Recap/TheSimpsonsS11E19KillTheAlligatorAndRun kill Homer Simpson.]]
346* ''WesternAnimation/StarWarsResistance'': In [[Recap/StarWarsResistanceS1E11Bibo "Bibo"]], the trouble caused by the title character causes Yeager to institute a new rule for his employees:
347-->"Yeager's Rule #7: No pets."
348[[/folder]]
349
350[[folder:Real Life]]
351* The [[http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-492449/Police-discover-Mafias-Ten-Commandments-arresting-Godfather.html Sicilian Mafia]].
352* The 36 Oaths of the Triads.
353* The grocery store Stu Leonard's has a sign up near the entrance that reads as follows:
354-->'''Rule #1''': The customer is always right.\
355'''Rule #2''': If the customer is ever wrong, see Rule #1.
356* Rule number one on the streets: No Snitching.
357* Rule Number One of Holes: When you find yourself in one, stop digging.
358* Rule number one of combat: Don't get hit.
359* [[UsefulNotes/UnionsInHollywood SAG-AFTRA]] has its [[http://www.sagaftra.org/production-center/globalruleone Global Rule One]][[note]]"No member shall work as a performer or make an agreement to work as a performer for any producer who has not executed a basic minimum agreement with the guild which is in full force and effect."[[/note]]
360* Rule Number One of first responder work (fire, ems, police) is sometimes said to be "don't get emotionally involved with the cases". Of course, it's easier said than done, but they do learn after a while.
361[[/folder]]
362

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